


Paradigm Shift

by Elebelle



Category: InuYasha - A Feudal Fairy Tale
Genre: Action/Adventure, Angst and Humor, Drama, Explicit Language, Explicit Sexual Content, F/M, Gen, Graphic Violence, Minor Apperance of Original Characters, Romance, Short Chapters, fast updates
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2020-01-09
Updated: 2020-02-07
Packaged: 2021-02-27 14:20:34
Rating: Explicit
Warnings: Graphic Depictions Of Violence
Chapters: 26
Words: 90,337
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/22188508
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Elebelle/pseuds/Elebelle
Summary: The total destruction and reforming of all notions. As if it wasn't enough that everything is changing, and she's noticing things that she overlooked before; Kagome's heart is in pieces, too. Hunting shards is harder now. Walls are closing in. She begins to feel edges fray. Voices, glances, touches, chances. Shift. Maybe being shattered is the best thing to ever happen to her.
Comments: 13
Kudos: 27





	1. Crack

**Author's Note:**

> Disclaimer: I own no part of the Inuyasha universe and all that is contained therein.

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Summary
> 
> In which the world is viewed anew as all preconceptions are destroyed and remade. As Kagome watches Inuyasha disappear into the line of trees that surround their latest campsite; something shatters. Others are left to pick up the pieces before they are lost and attempt to repair what seems to be broken beyond hope.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> DISCLAIMERS:
> 
> I do not now, nor have I ever claimed ownership in any way of any aspect of the Inuyasha 'verse.  
> I do not own the image that has been used for the story icon; it is available through public domain copyrights in a google image search.  
> I write for fun, personal enjoyment, creative outlets, and to try to bring some sort of positivity to the day of anyone reading. NOT for any sort of payment.  
> These disclaimers apply to all subsequent chapters in Paradigm Shift.
> 
> … … …
> 
> Intro Notes:
> 
> I'm basing ages loosely on the basic timeline of events in the series that is provided by timetoast dot com – it puts seven years between Kagome's first venture into the past and the cannon ending, with a three-year gap where she doesn't visit the past.
> 
> This is the premise I'm working with –
> 
> It took four years for Kagome to break and then fix and do away with the jewel. Accordingly, if she was 15 on her first visit, four years pass in the past, making her nineteen when the jewel is completed and disposed of.
> 
> Then the three-year gap before she goes back to marry Iunyasha in cannon- making her twenty-two.
> 
> Somehow, in some way, cannon says Kagome is eighteen when she marries Inuyasha. Hmmmmmm.
> 
> That aside, If you divide up seven years between the 193 episodes; each episode spans about ten to fourteen days.
> 
> This story begins between episodes 77 and 78, making Kagome 17, with a birthday quickly approaching.
> 
> … … …
> 
> Posted 1.8.2020
> 
> Edited 2.3.2020
> 
> 7.1.2020
> 
> … … …

Paradigm Shift

Chapter One: Crack

**_ … … … _ **

_At one point or another in our lives, there comes a moment of revelation. There are many such points in a lifetime but the first one is always the most memorable, for it is the hardest to struggle through. Who and what you become after any such revelation is different than who and what you were before- in a basic and fundamental way. Though it may not seem so while in the midst of the process, the destination is worth the journey._

_However._

_Before a revelation can be reached, a paradigm shift must first occur, and before that paradigm shift; destruction._

_No part of what makes someone who they are; morality, personality, opinion, belief- none of those fundamental aspects can be altered or grow on their own. This is the purpose of the revelatory process._

_Pain will be the usher of destruction into the spirit that holds a person together._

_That destruction makes way for the seeds of personal growth._

_Those seeds then flourish and remake the core of a person. This is the paradigm shift; the newness that settles slowly inside of a soul. Aspects of a person that are familiar, but different._

_Of course, there must always be a catalyst for pain- a seemingly innocuous moment that paves the way for pain and all that comes with it, and after it._

**_ … … … _ **

From her place at Kouga’s side, Kagome watched the events unfolding before her with an air of disbelief. The whole situation was impossible to her. Sure, she’d seen some pretty off-the-wall stuff in her time here in the past, but this was just weird. Not to mention the jarring feeling that comes with a situation this anti-climatic.

While all of the drama and anxiety of the battle had fizzled out, there was at least one person who was still full of anxious energy.

"Well, are we still fighting or what!?” Inuyasha shouted at the quartet of youkai.

He didn't really care about all the family crap they had going on. So what if their leader or dad, or whoever the ugly bastard was, had tried to kill them? They could join the club as far as he was concerned. He hadn’t met someone yet who didn’t have a messed up family.

Right now, Inuyasha was impatient. With his one-track mind, all he was able to think about is that he wanted all this crap to be over. With the so-called-battle over, he could separate Kagome and Kouga. He just knew that the damn idiot was as smug as he always was, having Kagome right next to him and his _affection_. All the better if he could just be on his way now; without having to worry about dragging out yet another fight and wasting even more time.

This whole thing had taken way too long already. They had more important things to do. Inuyasha wanted to leave and get back to the search for the remaining shards. Quickly. He fought down a startled twitch as one of the panthers replied softly, grawing him out of his thoughts.

"No, no more fighting. Not today. We shall return to the Western Lands. Tell Sesshomaru that won't you?" She stared up at the moon with a thoughtful look on her face that Inuyasha couldn’t be bothered to care much about.

Still, he couldn’t stop himself from following her gaze toward the accursed orb in the sky. The hateful circle of light that dictated his whole life. He scoffed as he looked at the moon, baring his teeth toward its face. It just doubled his bad mood. What was so great about the moon anyway? With a scoff, he sheathed Tetsusaiga and tore his eyes from the unreachable foe.

"We're not really that close." He muttered in response as he jumped down from his perch, walking toward Kagome, Kouga, and the rest of the onlookers.

Villagers and defenders alike had approached the area as the great panther leader fell in defeat. Kagome watched and listened to the exchange from amongst the nearby crowd. She rolled their words around in her mind for a while until she could pinpoint the part that had sparked the unease she felt. Her eyes widened as she went over the short conversation in her mind. Implications were coiled under the words that the panther youkai had spoken. Those implications, or at least the possibility of them, and what they could mean coursed through her and the barely-there gasp she sucked in went unheard.

Her eyes darted sideways to glance at Kouga, who stood close by her side, even as she gathered the words to voice her concerns. She swallowed around the forming question on her tongue, taking in the lips that she could see had drawn together tightly. It seemed like she wasn’t the only one concerned about the words that had been exchanged.

A quick look ahead toward the approaching Inuyasha told her that her hanyou friend wasn’t bothered by it… but still… something felt off. She reached over and laid her fingers gently against Kouga’s arm to get his attention.

"Uh... Kouga?" She whispered quietly.

He flashed her the same familiar, winning smile that he always had ready for her… but she had already seen his face etched in apprehension and his body tensed. He took in her expression and his smile slipped away, dark eyebrows pulling together in concern.

"What's wrong, Kagome? Are you hurt?" He gave a cursory glance over her body, even going so far as to grasp her soulders and twist her this way and that, searching for any signs of injury. The surface examination and a few sniffs of her scent told him that she was physically fine, so he met her fearful gaze with mild confusion.

"Kouga, The Western Lands… isn't Sesshomaru Lord of the Western Lands?" Her voice was quiet but urgent, and she leaned just a little bit closer to Kouga as she spoke.

That same apprehension that she had seen on him before flashed across his face. It was gone in an instant and he smiled gently at her before looking ahead, but she had known him long enough to be sure that it had been there. He cleared his throat and looked away from Kagome, pretending to be interested enough to watch Inuyasha's approach. A touch of frustrated bemusement colored her concern, but faded when Kouga responded.

"He is." Came so softly from Kouga's lips that if Kagome had not been so intent on his reply, she would have missed it completely.

Looking at the other youkai and humans that surrounded the two of them; it certainly seemed to her as though not even Kouga’s wolves among them had overheard. That, or they simply didn't care about the conversation. She couldn’t imagine that a few words between her and Kouga would be interesting to anyone that knew them, not in light of all that had just happened. She nearly laughed through the seriousness of the situation, thinking that any of the wolves would probably have perfected the art of turning them out by now. They probably just figured Kouga was flirting with her again.

Kagome fought with herself, trying not to get distracted by her want to dive right into the usual clean up that came after a fight like this, her scattered thoughts, or her own tendencies to want to avoid any conflict. Everyone around looked worn; none with serious injuries, but most with minor ones. The humans had to be pretty rattled if nothing else. Satisfied that there was no concern of imminent death, her gaze fell on Kouga's face once more. He looked just as worn and just as tired as the rest. She _was_ relieved to see that he seemed to be free of any injury. Not that she should be surprised by that.

Her teeth clamped onto her bottom lip as she followed his gaze to Inuyasha. Watching the stubborn and often crass _whatever he was to her anymore_ come closer, a tremor of determination shot through her and she stepped forward stiffly. He was only a few steps from them as she plucked up the gumption to confront him.

"Inuyasha!” She shouted. “I know you don’t like your brother-“ She ignored Kouga’s surprised twitch at her sudden yell, and the following snort of laughter at her words.

"Half-brother!" Inuyasha corrected sullenly.

Kagome rolled her eyes at the predictability of it.

"Ugh! You don't have to like him to tell him what-“

"I'm not his messenger or his keeper, Kagome! What am I supposed to be telling or not telling him, anyway!?"

Kagome’s next retort was silenced by Kouga’s interjection.

"You're not fit to be anyone's keeper, mutt." Kouga’s calm, soft voice and accompanying sly, teasing smirk were directed toward Kagome, even though his words were meant for Inuyasha.

To punctuate his declaration, Kouga broke eye contact just as quickly as he had initiated it and swiftly wrapped his arm around Kagome's waist; drawing her roughly into his side. Kagome closed her eyes in exasperation. Not that she wanted to provoke an argument with Inuyasha right now, but she didn’t exactly want to listen to this one either. She’d heard it enough that she could practically mouth the words before Inuyasha and Kouga spoke them.

So she let out a small sigh and showed an immense effort at self-control; fighting through her impatience. She looked at Kouga's hard grip on her waist and silently began attempting to pry his fingers, methodically, one by one, from her waist.

"Get your hands off of her, wolf!"

Another unseen eye roll from Kagome.

Kouga, on the other hand, smiled brilliantly at Inuyasha and opened his mouth to reply. The taunt died on his lips, face scrunching up in momentary confusion and mouth parted tp speak as he felt small, soft fingers on his own. He frowned down at Kagome and observed her intent mission to pry his hand from herself.

This wasn’t like his Kagome. She usually responded to these fights between the two of them in a more docile manner, just letting them do as they would until they decided whether they would try to land a few blows or not. A muscle in his jaw twitched as it occurred to him that her actions were most likely due to her concern over the panther’s declaration to head west.

With a measured calmness, and not once removing her eyes from her task, Kagome softly threw out her own words. She didn't care at this point if they were for her own peace of mind or if she wanted Inuyasha or Kouga to respond.

"Why don't I ever get consulted in any of this? I’m not just some _thing_ to be claimed, you know.” She wiggled one of her fingers under Kouga’s hand. “Besides.” A second finger. “It's not even the most important thing right now." Kouga flinched minutely, knowing that Kagome wasn’t going to let this go.

"What's that supposed to mean?" Inuyasha snapped at her, leaning his face into arm's reach.

Kagome shot him a glare. After thinking about it for a second, she gave Kouga a matching glare, thinking about how he didn’t have to antagonize Inuyasha at every chance he found, but did it anyway. The glare faded into a strained smile of thanks as his grip reluctantly dropped from her side.

"Inuyasha, if you're not going to tell Sesshomaru about something that could be really important, then I'll go tell him about it myself." With that, she turned on her heel and began picking her way through the crowd. “If he kills me then it’s your fault, though.”

Sesshomaru was a wildcard, as far as she was concerned. He seemed to switch back and forth between helpful and homicidal without warning.

 _‘Hopefully he’s in the mood to listen to me.’_ Kagome thought. _‘Maybe he’ll just leave me alone when I tell him about it. I’m not even worth the effort, right? Not alone, anyway. Yep. That’s me. Silly human girl, nothing to see here.’_

Kagome looked around at her surroundings, setting out in the direction she thought she had seen the inuyoukai go.

‘ _Hey Sesshomaru… you know those guys you were fighting? Yeah. They want to follow you home.’_ She hoped she still had time to catch up to him. Well… that and that he didn’t _actually_ feel particularly homicidal right at the moment. ‘ _That’ll go over well. Hm. “Hi Sesshomaru… the panthers you were just fighting are talking about living with you.” Ugh. Whatever. I’ll figure it out.’_ Her lip found itself clenched between unforgiving teeth once more.

Kouga’s eyes followed Kagome as she walked away, paying no mind to Inuyasha until he watched rapid steps closing the distance toward Kagome. That aggressive posture definitely got his attention. When Inuyasha’s arm shot out toward his Kagome, closing in a vice-grip on her upper left arm, his eyes narrowed, his knees bent, and his right foot scraped across the dirt and gravel as it slid forward. He watched Kagome's face contort and her eyes clench together in shock…and pain.

A growl rumbled up through himself as he snapped. With barely a thought, Kouga struck quick and hard. He closed the distance and twisted his body, landing a knee in the other man's midsection.

Inuyasha curled around the impact and tilted his face toward the wolf prince, answering one snarl with his own and releasing Kagome in the process. Before Inuyasha could retaliate, both Kouga and Kagome were gone in a spray of dirt.

"That damned wolf." He muttered to himself, regaining his breath and bounding after the two; knowing that Kouga would be much faster than he was. His anger was amplified as he realized how much time he might spend tracking the two of them if Kouga decided to take Kagome anywhere far. He didn’t have time for this shit. He needed Kagome so that they could all get back to hunting down the rest of the damned Shikon shards.

**_ … … … _ **

Kagome struggled to catch her breath as her feet touched upon the ground again. No matter how many times her friend whisked her away to parts unknown, she never could get used to having the wind stolen from her lungs as she was unceremoniously snatched from the earth and carried at such a speed. She bent over and placed her hands on her knees, drawing a few deep breaths and cutting a sharp glare at Kouga.

"Kouga!” She began with a scolding tone. “Why…” She trailed off mid reprimand, catching sight of the figure of the Western Lord in the distance. “Oh." A smile lit her face up. “Oh! Thank you, Kouga.”

Kouga glanced over his shoulder, looking behind himself at Sesshomaru, and then gave her a sheepish smile. He reached one hand up to tug at the strap that bound his hair, just a little nervous. He hadn’t given this much thought. He just wanted Kagome away from that idiot Inuyasha and he knew that Kagome wanted to go see Sesshomaru… so that’s where he took her.

"You're my woman!" He proclaimed loudly. His grin only widened when he received another cutting glare. He ignored it and barreled ahead. "Since you’re my woman, it's my job to make sure you get the things you want… and honestly,” Kagome watched as the lighthearted expression slipped from Kouga's face as his words took a more serious turn. “You're right that he should know about this."

His words quelled the anxiety she felt about her actions and she felt a little less ridiculous for being so hard-headed and soft-hearted over a few simple words.

“Thanks, Kouga.” She saw Sesshomaru's steps come to a halt as he, no doubt, heard them talking. She gave him a wry smile. “Am I just being stupid?”

“You’re not. A bunch of youkai that were obviously not fans of his just told everyone that they were going to head to the west. He's the Lord of those lands. The west happens to be where me and the other wolves live now, too. I suppose that you could say it’s my problem too."

Kagome's sight focused in on the regal inu-youkai as he turned sharply. She might not have been able to see it from this distance, but she could feel Sesshomaru’s stare zero in on the two of them; obviously now intrigued by Kouga's words.

Kouga turned from Kagome, looking across the distance to meet Sesshomaru's eyes. He didn’t shout when he spoke. He didn’t need to. Kagome was sure that Sesshomaru could hear the words from that far away just as easily as she could hear them right by Kouga’s side.

"Lord Sesshomaru.” He said. “We bring news that may be of importance to you."

The normal cold impassiveness that Sesshomaru was known for met his words from very very close, very very quickly. Kagome even felt some of her hair flutter. Sesshomaru said nothing, but she could almost convince herself that his pale face showed a slight hint of expectation.

She was spared barely a flash of a glance by the golden eyes that were so similar to Inuyasha's amber ones. She steadied herself and tried her best to project confidence as she brushed the length of her arm against Kouga’s to reassure herself. She knew that he could protect her if their most reluctant of allies turned violent… or at least run away really _really **really**_ fast. She felt an answering pressure against her arm and shoulder as she was readily given the reassurance that she sought.

"The panther tribe announced their intent to return to your lands, just after you left the battle." It was succinct and monotonous. The delivery shocked Kagome, making snap her gaze to Kouga. She had never heard such a lack of emotion in his voice. "Their leader told Inuyasha, directly."

Sesshomaru gave a curt nod to Kouga and began to turn from them.

"I give my thanks to you for bringing this to me."

"Respectfully, at first, I didn’t think enough of it to come see you.”

Sesshomaru's breath was exhaled sharply through his teeth and he spun on his heel, taking two quick strides to her friend. The open look of anger on Sesshomaru’s face made Kagome's blood freeze and her vision blur as adrenaline rushed through her system. She disn’t understand the instant anger, the sudden aggression, or the reasoning involved. She also didn't realize she had lifted her hand toward Sesshomaru's chest until the full intensity of his angered gaze landed on her. A growl sounded from what seemed like everywhere to her ears, but in reaity issued from somewhere low in Sesshomaru’s throat, before Kouga spoke; possibly saving her from at least a good maiming.

"Kagome is the one who insisted that you be made aware of this."

His words were rushed and they were laced with Kouga's frantic emotions once again. Kagome's relief at that small familiarity did little to dispel the fear in her. She had not been such a direct recipient of Sesshomaru's wrath before. It was unlike any other confrontation she had yet experienced. It was pretty uncomfortable considering that he had tried to melt her with acid when she was just in the way, once.

"Remove yourself from my person at once, miko, or I shall remove you myself." Sesshomaru snarled; a scant breadth of space from her.

Kagome jerked her arm from its place on his chest with haste, slightly dizzy. Her blood was competing to flush her cheeks in embarrassment and rush from her complexion in horror.

Sesshomaru straightened himself to his full height, turning his body to fully face her. He stared down at her for moments before giving her the same curt nod that he had previously directed at her friend.

Polite and collected or not…

Scary.

She tasted a small hint of copper from the piece of lip she so habitually abused and winced as they both drew in a long breath.

They stood in silence for what she thought was far too long. Finally, Sesshomaru turned away from them with a quiet chuckle.

Kagome let out the breath that she didn’t realize she had been holding, only to hear Sesshomaru call back the others that he regularly traveled with. She traded worried looks with Kouga, not really understanding why Sesshomaru would be calling his companions over to them.

"Miko."

Kagome was quickly becoming tired of the title.

"Kagome! My name is Kagome." Even as she slapped her hands over her mouth and screwed her eyes closed, there was heat and defiance in her tone that always seemed to pop up at the wrong time; both youkai gave her sharp, scolding looks once she pried open one eye.

"Miko. Up." Sesshomaru demanded.

She huffed and looked at him where he stood by the two-headed dragon-like beast that was so often with him. She landed er slightly panicked look on Kouga’s face.

"Lord Sesshomaru, why-“ Kouga started.

"Quiet, wolf."

A tug on Kagome's skirt had her crouching down and smiling for Rin. She hadn’t even seen the little girl walk over to her.

"You should do what Lord Sesshomaru says."

She gave Kagome her brightest smile, and Kagome's thoughts spun as she attempted to reconcile these events with what she knew. She stood again and took a few small and hesitant steps forward, all the while attempting to justify her compliance to herself. This little girl spent lots of time with Sesshomaru and she didn’t seem afraid. Sesshomaru had just helped them fight the panthers and their creepy deadish former leader. Uh… Sesshomaru might not be as scary as he seems once you get to know him? As she felt her feet once again leave the ground abruptly and without her consent, she rethought that last one.

Kouga could not repress a growl at hearing Kagome's alarmed shriek when Sesshomaru swept his arm under Kagome to bend her knees and carry her over, depositing her roughly onto the beast. He was answered with a fiercer growl and a gaze struck through with red, the face so close to his own that he could feel the other's warm breath on his skin. _‘Okay. Sesshomaru isn’t in the mood to deal with apprehension or indecision.’_ Kouga thought as he lifted his hands and held out his palms.

As soon as it happened, it was over. Kagome was seated on the bearing beast, Kouga was silent, and Sesshomaru was walking past Kouga, leading the dragon away with Kagome atop it, Rin trailing behind trough the long grasses and wildflowers.

"I wish to speak with Inuyasha." His calm baritone informed them, and he continued his path back toward the village they had all just left. Kouga followed at the dragon’s side, his fingers laid across her own on the leather saddle.

Well… they were going to head back to the village after talking to Sesshomaru in the first place. Kagome lifted one shoulder in a shrug and sent a nervous smile Kouga’s way. Might as well go with it at this point.

**_ … … … _ **


	2. A Different Sort of Confrontation

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> So this is my first ever experience as an author here at AO3. I'm pretty hyped about this chapter notes thing. I've never liked that FF.net makes it so that you have to include any notes in the actual body text. 
> 
> Posted 1.9.2020  
> Unedited

Paradigm Shift

Chapter Two: A Different Sort of Confrontation  
~~  
"Kouga!" Kagome's whisper was soft but with a frantic edge.

Their eyes met. He looked away but tightened his grip around her fingers on the saddle.

"Kouga!" She leaned down closer to his head.

She saw a muscle in his jaw twitch. He heard her teeth grind.

"What?"

"What's going on!?"

"I'm not sure, Kagome. My guess is we're going to find your group."

"I clearly remember saying that not moments ago." Sesshomaru interjected, causing the other two a small startle.

Kouga continued to walk alongside her after that. He wouldn't look at her again, despite her furious whispers or her nails prodding into his temple. She was worried though. This was all so surreal to her, and her friend's refusal to acknowledge her right now, in this strange situation, was anything but comforting. She couldn't tear her eyes from that persistent twitch in his jaw.

The distance that the wolf prince was putting between them stung her heart with hurt, and she felt an answering sting begin to make itself known to her in her eyes. She shut them tightly and dropped her head to her chest, proceeding to slip her fingers out of Kouga's grip. She was scared. How could he be like this right now? She knew he understood that she was afraid, knew that they both understood, knew they could smell it on her. She'd spent enough time wandering about the country to understand that the youkai could smell things like that.

Kouga's grip only tightened on her fingers as she tried to pull away. He set her palm flat on the leather, drawing his own fingers away only enough to lace them between her own before settling his own palm on the saddle in a larger, rougher mirrored version of her hand.

The gesture was small, and Kagome wasn't sure if she should be comforted or angry with him for it after the way she felt he had been treating her in the past few moments. Her world still felt upside down, spiraling away from her grasp on everything she thought she knew about the two powerful men, but at least that confusing gesture drove away the panic that had been threatening to suffocate her.

The stiffening of white, silken-clad shoulders went unnoticed by them both. Sesshomaru could smell the traces of her tears as they welled up, and he could hear her breath come unevenly as she held it in an attempt to keep them from spilling over. His hand closed in a near-fist before relaxing again and, though the small gestures had been the only indicators that he noticed Kagome's distress at all, he still heard the pounding of Rin's small feet as she ran to his side and grasped a tiny handful of his sleeve.

He heard the sharp intake of the girl's breath and tilted his face to her. Before she could say whatever she would have, the silk fell to his elbow from the weight of her grasp on it's end as he lifted a slender finger to his lips in askance for her silence. His ears were treated to a small giggle as she met his eyes and smiled. He curled his fingers backward to brush against the child's small, soft wrist for only a moment, the gesture hidden by the volume of the sleeve.

Though the Miko seemed to possess somewhat more a modicum of manners, now, Sesshomaru allowed a miniscule tilt upward of his lips as he thought on how much more discreet and mannered his child was in comparison.

Only his eyes moved to the girl as she tugged once on the fabric she held, and he noted the small frown she gave him whilst tilting her head back at the miko. Eyes still on the small thing that could somehow ask so much more from him than he would give any other; he spoke.

"You have no need for that nonsense, miko. If I were of mind to harm you at this time, it would already be done." Another titter lifted to him from his elbow.

"Surely by now, you realize that I keep no patience for foolishness."

Kagome's mind blanked at the reality that Sesshomaru…was trying to quiet her fear..? It took her a moment to process it completely before responding.

"Thank you."

A pause.

"And I'm sorry." She left off the excuses and reasons that she could have used to justify her maelstrom of conflicting emotions. She knew that they all could understand that this was a bizarre circumstance.

"There is no need of apologies, miko, nor of thanks. You have done me a service tonight, despite our… somewhat tumultuous past. It is I that should offer my own thanks to you."

Slightly chagrined at that, Kagome gave a snort of air at the whole of it all. At that moment, as different as night and day though the two were, their faces reflected each other in humor; though neither could see the other one.

The exchange had done a lot to quell her anxiousness and she squeezed the fingers that were still laced with hers, trying to relay to Kouga something of that. There was an answering pressure from him, but a lingering look at his features still gave her pause. His jaw was still clenched and his brows furrowed; mouth set in a hard line of anger.

Maybe she had taken the pestering a bit far while she tried to pry answers from him. Kagome had no time to dwell on that regret as Sesshomaru came to a halt and lifted one ear toward the left of them. He gave her a look that she couldn't interpret, turned it on her friend, and then settled it back on her before crouching down.

Sesshomaru released his fingers from around Rin's wrist where they had found purchase and had tightened briefly. He locked eyes with the miko again before steeling his decision. He curled the girl into his chest and, once her small hand grasped his armor, lifted her with more delicate attention than Kagome or Kouge had thought him capable of. In a blink, he had settled the girl in Kagome's lap on the dragon, grabbed Kagome's left arm, and wrapped it across Rin's chest. He pressed Kagome's flesh into the girl as he stared into Kagome's face with a hard look for heated moments.

"Do not leave..

His eyes moved to hers before going back to the child's face once more.

"Do not leave Kagome, Rin."

"Yes, Lord Sesshomaru!" Both of her own arms came up to curl over Kagome's one.

Another seconds long look into Kagome's eyes.

"Ah-Un!" He shouted commandingly as he drew Tokijin and turned from them. Kouga was by his side, poised for battle, before Kagome could blink. She had no time to respond to Shesshomaru or Kouga, had no time to question them, and had to fight down a shriek of surprise as the dragon's legs bent and released, propelling the three of them into the sky. They floated backward away from where the other two were apparently readying themselves for a fight.

She could sense no part of the Shiko jewel but for her own, and hugged the girl close to her, now wrapping her tightly with both arms.

She wished desperately for her bow and arrows, before feeling the soft flyaways of Rin's hair at her neck. Kagome pressed a cheek to the top of her hair and gave her another brief squeeze as she realized that she would have only moved from her to help the others if the fight seemed to be turning badly out of their favor, anyway.

She did this to a lesser degree with Shippou but, unlike the kit, the girl in her arms was, as far as she was aware, completely without any defenses of her own to protect herself.

Her eyes widened as a thought struck her and rang through her mind.

"Sesshomaru knew that I would keep you safe, Rin, didn't he?"

She felt the girl's smile on the skin of her forearm before she drew it away to answer Kagome.

"Lord Sesshomaru always knows best."

With that, she wiggled her way down into Kagome's embrace.

They watched as the creaks of branches and rustle of leaves finally reached their human ears. It was odd to feel defended by Sesshomaru with even any amount of fierceness, but she thought that maybe she was beginning to numb to the sensation of it even after the short few minutes that they had their strange conversation and even stranger walk.

He guided Rin to turn in her arm and lay her head against her own chest as she hardened herself to protect her temporary charge, and faced the line of trees to await whatever foe would soon be upon them all.


	3. Perspectives

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Posted 1.10.2020  
> Unedited

Paradigm Shift

Chapter Three: Perspectives

~~

The noise was deafening as it echoed through the air. Sesshomaru had easily blocked the determined swing of the much lager weapon, despite its size. Not half as deafening as the shrill scream that left Kagome’s lungs.

“INUYASHA!” She screamed his name and reached one arm out toward where the hanyou was sliding roughly across the terrain, having been propelled backward by the force of Sesshomaru’s counter swing.

Inuyasha sprung from the dirt easily as he heard her voice. He heard the urgency in her tone and nothing else, and then he saw Kouga standing by Sesshomaru’s side. The little logic that he could have used to understand what was going on before him fled in an instant in the swirling mix of that urgent scream, the blow that had flung him out of reach, and the sight of the wolf poised for battle.

Feet pounded quickly over the grass as he lunged again. Inuyasha’s swing barely missed Kouga as he saw the approaching slash of Tetsusaiga and buckled his knees in a crouch.

“We trusted you, wolf! I TRUSTED YOU! I trusted you with her and you took her to him!?”

A brief snarl left Sesshomaru in his offense at the implication that he was suddenly regarded as an enemy once more. He sheathed his sword regardless of it. Kouga had no time to reply as he spent his energy on dodging Inuyasha’s attacks.

 _‘this situation is spiraling further and further out of control and getting more and more surreal.’_ Kagome thought as she watched the scene in rising horror. Sesshomaru’s claws began to glow with a bright green flare as he raised them to intensify the fight.

“No! Stop!” She yelled.

Either none of them heard her over the sounds of their struggle, or none of them were willing to listen. Rin’s head turned from her chest to watch the proceedings with wide eyes. As she watched Sesshomaru’s knees bend in preparation to meet Inuyasha in the air, desperation clawed at her throat and tears once more stung at her eyes. She clutched the precious child in her arms closer to her and covered the girl’s ears as she drew in a breath so deep that it made her lungs ache.

“INUYASHA! SIT!”

The sight of a streak of red and white plummeting from high in the air to the ground below him made her want to shut her eyes, but she couldn’t. She stared in an exhausted half-in-shock state as the impact brought a massive _thud_ with it.

Even as Kagome became aware of her rapid breaths, and the thought that she might be beginning to hyperventilate crept somewhere in the back of her mind, she took in the sight of the aftermath. She gave a flinch at the damage that was caused by Inuyasha’s impact. She watched Kouga; with one hand across his ribs and the other covering his mouth in mirth. Sesshomaru’s impassive gaze at them both, passing quickly as he turned to her. She could almost imagine him lifting a sculpted eyebrow at her in humor, though he was too far away for her to make out a clear expression on his face. Rin’s shoulders shook in her grasp, and as Ah-Un landed once more and began walking toward the trio, there was an unmistakeable swish to and fro of his tail.

His gait was smooth and unconcerned as Sesshomaru turned his back on the others and made his way to Kagome, Rin, and Ah-Un. He came near enough to the two atop the dragon that Kagome felt the brush of cool silk along her thigh and knee. She gave a small shudder at the sensation in her state of heightened senses from the adrenaline.

Their lips parted at the same moment and closed in unison in the next.

Her smile was strained but genuine, knowing that he would wait for her to speak first. She reached timid fingers out to him and a whispered “Thank you, Lord Sesshomaru.” Left her. The title was foreign on her tongue, but she could see the approval of it in small lightening of the shade of his eyes. Unbidden, the thought of how expressive his eyes were and how similar that was to Inuyasha.. and how that seemed st startling somehow, that he could be similar in any way to his half-brother in such a personal way; so different from just a similarity of the color in their eyes or the color of their hair. That slight shift in color, just a shade lighter than the typical deep gold of Sesshomaru’s eyes made her feel like she’s glimpsed some well-hidden secret that he kept; a secret that spoke of what might lay inside of him- the same way that Inuyasha’s eyes betrayed his emotions, his heart… his soul to her so often. She blinked and the moment was broken. “And I’m sorry about Inuyasha.” She said in a louder, but ragged voice.

Kagome still held Rin in her arms, and her head flipped back and to between Kagome and Sesshomaru as the silence stretched. She slid her far leg over Ah-Uh’s back, thankful that her modesty was preserved by the child in her arms. She could feel the fabric of her uniform skirt bunch precariously around her thighs, sliding far too high on her flesh than she was comfortable with at this proximity to Sesshomaru. She could still feel the caress of silk sliding over her skin as she repositioned herself with both legs before his chest.

She was also hyper-aware that though her undergarments and more personal areas may be covered by Rin’s small presence; her little body also left her in a position that felt just as, if not more, exposed. Legs spread to accommodate the girl, and knees now pressed softly into the chest of the man before her. Unbidden, she felt her face flush and her ears heat at the sight she must present to him. Her breath caught in her throat as he reached forward and slid his large, clawed hand very briefly across the top of her hip, over the small of her back, and to her other side. He gripped her waist tightly and pulled her flush to that hard expanse where her knees were just moments ago; the quick slide of the leather saddle burned the back of her thighs as the sweat on them made her legs stick to the saddle. She barely registered that in her surprise.

He jostled her once to adjust his hold, and gripped her thigh now, Rin cradled between them as he finished dragging them off of Ah-Un’s Back. The entire process and the intimate touches that were used sent a spark of something shooting straight through her as Sesshomaru crouched down and her feet touched the ground. She lowered Rin out of her arms moments after, giving a small cough into a fist against her lips as she broke eye contact. When he spoke, she couldn’t face him again as she heard his slow intake of air near her, knowing that he could smell the effect he had wrought from her traitorous body.

“You have no need to apologize for my errant half-brother, nor do you have need to thank me, yet again, for anything.”

With her face still directed toward where Kouga was now sitting on the field, waiting for Inuyasha to move, she fought another shudder at the undertones that came with the octave drop in his voice. Her eyebrows drew together and she forced her head up to look at him, nearly backing up a step at the intensity in his face.

“For Rin. Thank you for Rin. For trusting me to keep her safe.” She paused and bit at her lip. “It means a lot to me that you would.” And her eyes left his face again.

“It was- He hesitated, needing to choose the right words to impart his message accurately. “It is indisputable that you protect fiercely, Kagome.” The sound of her name on his lips for the second time made her breath hitch. She wondered if it felt as foreign in his mouth as his title had felt in hers. Then the flush in her face deepened as her hormones attempted her to be distracted by the fact that she was thinking of his _mouth_ at all. “I have experienced first-hand your fierce nature when you are determined to protect someone.” The near miss of an arrow shooting by his ear flashed before her eyes and she grinned.

“I guess you have, huh?” She was unprepared for the rise in the volume of his voice as he called, “Rin” firmly. The girl halted immediately at his call. “Do not go any closer.” Rin had been only a dozen steps from them, walking in the direction of Kouga’s bored interest with Inuyasha’s still prone form.

He turned from Kagome and walked to Rin’s side. She thought she may have heard a whisper of _you are welcome_ as he did so, but she thought that it could have easily have been her imagination. With the moment gone, whatever it had been, she moved in the same direction and passed the pair, coming to sit by Kouga as he watched Inuyasha.

She grimaced as she looked at the hanyou. His face had turned, cheek resting on the ground, but otherwise hadn’t moved from where he had hit the earth. His eyes bore into her with a furious expression. He finally rolled over onto his back and sat up, facing away from them.

“You wanna tell me what the hell is going on?”

“I _told_ you that I would tell Sesshomaru what happened after he left, myself!”

Inuyasha spun on the ground to face her.

“You didn’t have to let the wolf attack me and then carry you off somewhere! What was I supposed to think!”

“He does it all the time Inuyasha! He’s never hurt me before! Why would he start now!?! Why can’t you just use your brain for once and _think_ before you start swinging weapons around!? Idiot.”

He only glowered at her.

“It was important!”

“You couldn’t have known that!”

“She could, actually. She asked me about it.” Kouga interrupted.

“Stay out of it!” Inuyasha yelled back.”

“Leave him alone, Inuyasha! UGH! Just! You! SIT!”

The force was much smaller this time, but it didn’t stop Kouga from snickering at the second faceful of dirt that Inuyasha was getting. The mirth only made her bristle further as she balled her fists at her side and turned from them.

Rin was still a ways off, her and Ah-Un sitting on the grass, the dragon looking quite content with the small scratches on both of his snouts. Sesshomaru had just stepped up to take a post on her other side, eyes passing over first her, then Kouga, and landing on Inuyasha.

“You would have withheld information that could mean the outbreak of an uprising in my lands?”

Inuyasha huffed.

“How utterly thoughtless of you, Inuyasha. I doubt you even took a moment to think of what the actions and words of the Panther Tribe could have meant. For all we know, it may even be stirrings of intent to war with my lands.”

“If it’s all that damn serious, then why are you still here?”

Kagome could hear the clatter of stones as Kouga kicked his foot out across the dirt before standing. When she looked, his face was drawn again, and a glare was directed at Inuyasha.

“Jaken is fit enough to carry the warning to my lands. Measures will be taken to prepare heightened defenses.”

The silence after that was almost tangible. Sesshomaru turned and gestured for Rin and Ah-Un to approach now that he was sure there would not be another clash between himself and Inuyasha for now.

“We will be accompanying your little band.” He declared.

An indignant look at his back from Inuyasha.

“What do you-

“I will be as well.” Kouga spoke up.

Inuyasha gaped at them both.

“What do you mean you’re coming with us!? Like hell you are! Either of you!”

“Inuyasha….sit” And Kagome closed her eyes.

“We should go back to the village and find the others, check on the villagers too…” She suggested. Kouga gave a nod, and Sesshomaru a hum of agreement.


	4. Wants

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Posted 1.11.2020
> 
> Just to ease minds, I want to throw a few things out there.  
> -This is not a harem !!omg kagome can't decide and every guy wants to be with her!!! type of fic  
> -Nom I'm not going to reveal what the end pairing is going to be. I think it ruins the story if you know from the beginning. I REALLY hope this doesn't put anyone off from reading it.  
> -IT WILL NOT BE INUYASHA WHO ENDS UP WITH KAGOME  
> Yeah. So there's THAT  
> but that's all I'll say on the matter of pairings.
> 
> I'm really loving where this is going so far. I'm literally posting as soon as I finish writing these. (Sorry for typos, mistakes and the like. I'll fix them later, I swear) I'm not sure 100% myself where it's going to end up, but I've never had any writing just flow out of me like this before. It's fun.
> 
> And I can't remember what else I was going to say here, because whew. Someone grab some ice; this chapter is kinda steamy.
> 
> Please enjoy.

Paradigm Shift

Chapter Four: Wants

The unlikely group, sans one fuzzy-eared bad temper, made their way toward the village in silence. Once they were within sight of it, Kouga told them that he would meet back up with them before they left again. At Kagome’s inquisitive look, he told them that he wanted to talk to the others of his tribe that had come there with him, and inform them of his new plans to travel with Kagome and the rest.

To her immense relief, it looked at though Miroku and Sango had made short work of checking on the welfare of the villagers. The excitement of the day had her feeling pretty worn down already, though, by the look of the sun the evening coolness was still a few hours away; meaning nightfall and sleep would be even further.

An armful of kitsune and the tickle of Kirara’s fur on her ankles later, and Kagome was smiling again; the stress of the day seeming lighter for now.

With the people of the village seen to, bumps bandaged and spirits calmed, All of them set out again in a haze of awkwardness. Miroku had taken the new additions to their group in stride, and Sango didn’t ask many questions. Kagome knew that the other woman would talk with her later about it, though. Whenever they found shelter with a place to bathe for the night.

They traveled until the light began to wane and Kagome could barely keep her eyes open. Completely bellying the distant attitude that Kouga had projected since his and Kagome’s initial conversation with Sesshomaru- he was the first to notice her exhaustion and demand that they stop for the night.

With Inuyasha still missing from their company, there were no protests.

They walked a short distance more, until Sesshomaru told them that he could hear the distinctive airflow of a large cave and running water nearby. He led them to a small crevice in a rockface that was mostly hidden by underbrush and branches. It was a tall, jagged, and narrow entrance, and the floor of the cave was rather treacherous with fist-sized rocks littered about it. The ground soon leveled out and the entrance widened, though. The first cavern that it opened into was moderately sized around, and domed high above their heads. There were a few off-shoots that Kouga, Sesshomaru, and Kirara inspected for a while to check for any dangers before they settled in to rest for the night.

Though the path from the cavern to the entrance was utterly straight, barely any light seeped into the area from the opening. Kagome knew that soon, they would be cast in total darkness here. She smiled to herself as she thought of the surprise she had brought with her from home in case they stopped somewhere like this. It had been a gift from her mother when last she had gone through to the other side of the well.

Sesshomaru has left Ah-Un at the cave entrance. He was quite obviously not going to fit through the small space to come in with them, so he was charged with guarding the temporary abode.

Everyone settled in their own way. Kagome passed around a small stash of bed sheets that she had crammed into the bottom of her bag. They were thin, but would provide either a barrier between skin and stone, or skin and air. Whichever each person decided to use them for.

Sesshomaru and Kouga refused her offers, but the rest gladly accepted the sheets and thanked her. She missed her sleeping bag.

Over the years, she had done her best to limit what she brought to the past with her. The weight of what she had brought with her as supplies up until a few months ago had become both a hindrance and a cause of pain for her. Her back and shoulders ached just remembering it.

Rin and Shippou made quite the adorable picture, snuggled together and sharing their sheets as they chatted softly about their separate experiences traveling with their typical company.

Kagome tugged off her shoes and sighed in relief at the feeling. She tucked then against the wall by her pack and dug out a sizeable bottle of shampoo/bodywash. It was probably the biggest thing that she had with her, minus the surprise she had brought for everyone. It just wasn’t in her to do without her hygiene though. She also pulled out a detergent bar that she could wash her clothing with, wrapped in layers of brown paper. It was another gift from her mother, who had found the laundry bars by chance during a shopping trip. Her first thought had been of her daughter, of course. The second had been the thought of the many replacement uniforms that she had needed to buy Kagome over the years.

Sango smiled widely at the appearance of the bottle and stood to join her. They shared smiles, and Kagome approached Sesshomaru.

“Uhm.”

He turned to give her his attention from where he sat with his legs stretched out before him on the ground.

“I was hoping-“ She tucked her hair behind her ears. “I was wondering if it would be alright for us to take Rin to bathe?”

He peered behind her at the slayer, and then nodded his consent; motioning Rin to join them. The girl dropped to her knees by his hip and he rested his hand on her hair.

“Would you like to join the women to clean yourself, Rin?” She nodded eagerly and he tilted his head in acquiescence. Rin bounded up and over to Sango, grasping her hand as they made their way to one of the passages in the cavern wall.

“You said the stream was this way, Kouga?” Sango asked, pointing at one of the mouths.

“Yeah. It's not far. It’s pretty cold though. Smells like it comes down fresh from high in the mountain.”

Sango nodded and the two kept walking, eager to divest themselves of the layer of dirt and grime that covered their skin. As she pivoted to join them, Kagome felt a firm grip on her ankle. She looked back and Sesshomaru had leaned over, stretching his arm across his chest to halt her. She opened her mouth to ask what he was doing, but he spoke before she could.

“She stays with you in the water, Miko.”

Kagome nodded and he released her.

~~

“Wow, Kouga wasn’t exaggerating even a little.” Sango winced as she dipped a hand in the shallow water.

“Well. We’ll be quick then.” Kagome told her with a smile. “What I wouldn’t give for a hot spring right now though. My legs are so sore.”

“Oh, I completely understand, Kagome.” Sango watched as her friend reached her hand out to Rin and the girl came to her side.

“We should wash our clothes first.” She told Sango and Rin. “You can borrow my spare nightshirt, Rin.” Kagome held up a soft pink shirt to her small frame. “Well, it’ll be a touch short, but it’ll do.” They traded smiles. “At least you can use the sheet I gave you to keep your legs covered. I’m sure it’s big enough to totally wrap around you, you little thing.”

Rin stifled a giggle in her palms as Kagome reached out and tickled her sides.

“Thank you, Lady Kagome!”

The title gave Kagome pause for a second and she told Rin that she didn’t have to use it. The woman gave a soft snort and the girl replied with an energetic, “Okay, Lady Kagome!”

She stood as the other two removed their clothing, and placed her clean underwear, comfy shorts, and two worn shirts on a dry ledge. Sango’s white underdress joined them. She wore it as a barrier between her slayer outfit and outer clothing, but it was fairly comfortable to sleep in and would have to do since they were going about bathing quickly. Their clothes wouldn’t have time to dry enough to put back on, tonight.

They made short work of washing and rinsing their garments, and even short work of washing themselves. Kagome let out a gasp as her thighs hit the water, and ran her hands over the back of them. There were a few scratches on the backs of each of her thighs, and the skin was slightly welted with irritation. Being slid from that saddle must have caused more friction than she had initially thought, and she vowed to rethink her choice of clothing to bring to the past with her from now on. Rin was never more than half an arm’s length from her side. Hair and important parts were washed and they all stepped out of the water shivering.

Sango leaned close to Kagome as they made their way back to the group and whispered a hasty, “We’ll talk as soon as we can get some time alone.” Kagome nodded and smiled at her.

The men of the group all looked toward them as they entered the cavern. Sango gave Kagome a significant glance when they all noticed that Inuyasha had rejoined them, and was sulking a bit apart from the others, arms in his sleeves before his chest. He didn’t look at them once.

She didn’t try to go to him this time. Instead, she placed the bar by her shoes to dry, and placed the bottle back in her bag, drawing out a tube of ointment for her abused thighs, with only a brief look of annoyance directed at Shessomaru. His eyes were closed and his head rested against the wall behind him. She didn’t know if he was asleep or not, but he definitely didn’t catch the cross look that he was the recipient of. Kagome debated on whether to be irritated at that or relieved. She settled somewhere in the middle. She was still rather wary of the powerful inu-youkai. Their interactions today confused her more than they put her at ease in his company. Too many hostile memories, maybe.

She also pulled out a plastic dome, about the size of one half of a basketball. It had little cutouts of stars, and suns, and various phases of the moon on its surface. She cleared her throat and walked to the center of the room, placing it on the ground and flipping a switch to make the batteries bring it to life.

The cavern was filled with slow swirls of blue light as the black plastic dome circled the bulb inside, encased in white plastic. The designs bounced about the cave walls and she looked at each face as they watched the designs glow and fill the space with a dim light. It wasn’t much, but there was just enough light coming from it to illuminate them so that they could see each other as they would under a bright moon.

They all looked mesmerized. Especially the children. Kirara pounced around the place, trying to pin down one of the little suns as it traversed the walls.

“This is beautiful, Kagome.” Miroku’s soft voice said. He was looking right at her, and she made sure her things were pressed firmly together where she was in a squat before the projector. His eyes didn’t leave hers until they closed and he leaned against the wall again.

She could see the questioning looks from Sesshomaru and Kouga, but didn’t much feel like addressing whatever concerns that they might have about her contraption right now. She stood with her tube of ointment in hand and walked back over to her own little spot in the cave.

Sitting tenderly on her spread-out blue cotton sheet and bending her knees, she tried to rub the ointment into the soreness on her skin, but couldn’t seem to get it coated completely. Tube in hand, she looked at sango, but the other woman was already asleep.

Her gaze traveled to each member of the group in turn, thinking of asking for help. Poor Rin and Shippou were already snuggled into the crook of Sango’s knees and their eyes were drooping closed as she watched. Miroku was totally out of the question. She definitely didn’t need to give him the opportunity or the permission to cop a feel. The same could be said of Kouga. Inuyasha was out. Sesshomaru was so far from being an option that she shook her head frantically as she looked at him. She thought better of the idea and just put the ointment back in her bag and settled in for some rest. The lights really were beautiful. She glanced at Miroku again and smiled. Sometimes… sometimes his compliments were really sweet. When they weren’t horrifyingly suggestive, anyway.

The dim, spinning light threw his face in and out of shadow, highlighting his handsome face, and she couldn’t help but smile at the sight. As calm and collected as he tried to appear in the waking hours, it was contrasted in his sleep when real calmness stole over his features.

She yawned and rested her head on her arm as she drifted off to sleep herself.

~~

It seemed like no time had passed at all when Kagome stirred from slumber.

There was a pressure that was insistently making itself known to her, and she wanted nothing to do with it. As much as she tried to ignore her bladder, she knew it wouldn’t make it go away.

She groaned as she sat up. The stone was not the most comfortable place to sleep. A small flashlight was retrieved and she hoped that her bare feet didn’t make too much noise in the acoustic space as she made her way down a passage to relieve her bladder.

~~

Finished, and rinsed as well as possible with a fast dripping trickle of water from the ceiling of the passage she had gone down, Kagome longed for the comfort of toilet paper and indoor plumbing.

Once she made her way back, Kouga was standing, back leaned against the wall of the same passage, only steps inside and away from everyone else.

“Sorry. Did I wake you?” She asked.

“The light. Those lights are pretty handy, you know. Would you tell me how you made them if I asked really nicely?” He stepped away from the wall with a sly look and took a few steps toward her.

She smiled and shook her head at him, arms behind her back and bouncing on the balls of her feet.

“We should get back to sleep, Kouga. I’m sure morning isn’t too far off.”

“Actually, I was hoping to talk to you for a minute.”

She glanced behind her and wrinkled her nose.

“Okay, but not here. Gross. Let's go down by the stream.”

He nodded and they made their way toward the water and the now mostly dry clothing that they women had laid out on dry stones.

It didn’t take Kagome long to regret her decision, though. She had already been almost unbearable cold, and the air by the water had dropped in temperature significantly. She shivered.

“What did you need to talk about?” Her head turned to him.

Her face scrunched up in distaste at the sight of his darkened expression.

“And what’s with the angry face, huh?” Sleep had put his treatment of her yesterday out of her mind, but seeing the expression painted on his face woke her enough to feel the offense at it again. “Did I do something to annoy you, or what?” She huffed at him.

He worked the muscles in his jaw a few times before pacing in front of her.

“No.” A pause and a glance at her. “Yes. No. Kagome.” He took in a deep breath and shook his head to clear the muddled thoughts.

“Kouga..”

“I wanted to apologize.”

“Oh.”

“I don’t want you to think that I was being callous to you, Kagome.” He stepped close to her and took her free hand in both of his. They were warm.

“Weren’t you though? I was pretty freaked out today and you wouldn’t even look at me! And that face!”

“Kagome, I

“What did I do to deserve being pushed away like that? I’m your friend!”

He tugged her hand and caught her as she stumbled, holding her to his chest.

“It wasn’t you, Kagome. I was..” He exhaled sharply and continued, “I didn’t like you seeing me that way.”

“Then you shouldn’t have acted that way!” She pushed at his stomach, where her hands were pinned against him. He drew back, but not much.

“No. I mean… with Sesshomaru. All _submissive_ to him like I was.” She stopped pushing against him, a little shocked. ‘ _he was embarrassed.’_ Then she remembered the _yes_ he had mixed into his answer a second ago.

“Wait. So why did you say yes too? When I asked if I had upset you.” His hands drifted to her hips and he pushed her back from him at arm’s length and searched her face.

“Kouga? What did I do?”

“It... It wasn’t really _you_ or” He stumbled over the words. “Well. It _was_ you.” He tightened his grip on her hips and looked down into her eyes. “most of it was me being annoyed that the mutt gets away with so much that he doesn’t deserve.” He released her and resumed pacing, his nose pinched between his thumb and forefinger. “Not all of it though.”

“I’m confused, Kouga. So you were annoyed at me because you were annoyed with Sesshomaru and Inuyasha?”

 _“NO!”_ He hissed at her. He shook his head and bent over to place his hands on his knees.

“Then what!” Her patience was wearing thin now. She was tired and confused and the stressed, faux-whispers they were trading so as not to wake anyone else were frustrating.

“I get that you were embarrassed having to defer to Sesshomaru, Kouga. I get it. I do understand though.” She bent to look into his face and placed her palm on his shoulder. “You have to be, if you live in his lands, right?”

“Yeah…”

He straightened up and she followed.

“It’s not just that though. It’s worse because _he_ doesn’t have to be.”

“Inuyasha?” He nodded at her, his eyes screwed shut.

“Especially when it’s a formal conversation like we had with Sesshomaru. There are these _rules_ … it’s just _expected_ that people act a certain way around him” Kagome rubbed small circles on his shoulder as he spoke. This is probably the most personal talk they had ever had, and she was learning more about him, personally than she ever had before. Small glimpses of who he really was under all the bluster and flirting.

“The damn dog doesn’t even care about what he has. Sesshomaru just _lets_ him act the way he wants.”

“Not all the time” She replied with a half-hearted laugh. He graced her with a smile for it.

“Maybe not. He still doesn’t deserve it. Or appreciate it.” He turned to face her fully again, taking a step to bring them closer. Kagome’s smile faltered a little as he invaded her personal space again. He did it every time he saw her, but it wasn’t something she ever got used to; from anyone. She liked her bubble, thankyouverymuch.

“Or want it, from what I can see. He takes it for granted.” He reached out too quickly for her to avoid his arms reaching around to rest on the small of her back and pull him flush to his chest again. He laughed nervously, standing tiptoe and bracing herself with her hands on his forearms. She was leaning away from him some, trying to put what distance she could between their chests.

“Uh. Kouga?” Another nervous laugh and she patted his arms with her hands. “Little bit close.”

He ignored her and went on.

“Like you, Kagome. He doesn’t deserve you.” She stilled and relaxed in his arms, lowering herself back onto level feet and reaching her arms around him in a hug.

“Maybe not.” She whispered.

The rumble in his chest at that reply made her jump.

All of a sudden his hands had slid from her waist and he had bent, gripping her thighs and lifting her, pressing her back to the wall. Her eyes widened like a deer in the forest and her breath caught, her hands pushing against his shoulders as he buried his face in the crook of her neck, his soft rumble spilling over into a real growl. It was soft but it was very real and it scared her a little.

“Kouga.” She smacked at his shoulders with her palms and pushed at them, but he didn’t budge a centimeter.

“And then he comes in, sword swinging at me like he has to _rescue_ you from me. Like I’d _actually ever hurt you!”_ She felt his breath on her neck, warm. His words in her mind. His hands on her thighs, just a bit too high for her to be totally comfortable… if anything about this position he had her pinned in could be comfortable. She felt vulnerable. Then she felt his lips on her collarbone.

A deep, jagged sigh spilled from her mouth and her head rested against the wall. A jolt of fire ran through her body and he growled again, short this time, before she felt another kiss on her throat under her chin.

“Kouga.”

He gripped her legs tighter, and pressed her into the wall just a little more.

“Kouga. Stop.”

His hands slid up her legs just a tiny bit more. Dangerously close to more intimate waters.

“Kouga! Kouga, stop!”

“I could smell you Kagome.”

She felt like all of the blood in her body had rushed to her face.

“I could smell you when he pulled you down from the dragon.”

“Oh.” She whispered

“I can smell you now, too.”

He pressed closer to her, pressing his chest to hers and drawing one of her legs around his hip.

“Kouga!” She was starting to panic a little now, as if she hadn’t done enough of that yesterday.

“Put me down, Kouga!” Even she could hear the tremors in her voice.

He shuddered out a hot breath across her chest, and another lick of fire went through her body.

“I don’t want to, Kagome.”

“Please. Please, Kouga.” She didn’t want to cry again either, but she thought she was going to. Her breath hitched and her eyes crinkled as she pressed them closed as tightly as she could manage. _‘not like this, oh please, not like this.’_

Maybe it was her tears, or her pleas, she didn’t know. His grip went slack and he lowered her to the ground to stand on her own. She darted out from between him and the wall, hand to her chest and vision blurry in her fright as she tried to catch her breath. She watched him place both forearms on the wall and lean heavily on them, panting.

“I’m sorry, Kagome. I’m sorry.” His head shook back and forth and came to a stop as he laid it against the wall and slammed both fists into the rock. They made tiny cracks splinter out around his hands. “I’m so sorry. I should have never-“

Silence.

They didn’t move and the only sounds that could be heard were their breaths, anything but calm; loud in the little cave with the little stream.

 _‘Well, I’m not cold anymore.’_ Kagome thought absurdly.

“Kouga? It’s okay. Look at me?”

“It’s not! It’s not okay! I could have… I almost… _I wanted to_ ” She didn’t need him to clarify.

“ _Fuck, Kagome._ I can _still_ smell you.”

“I’m seventeen Kouga. And healthy. _Of course_ I’m going to react when a guy touches me like that. Not being able to hide it at all is pretty embarrassing though.” This time it was him who laughed. Deep and slow, laced with the heaviness of the moment.

“Doesn’t help me any, Kagome.”

“Well… it’s not really meant to.” Her smile was crooked and strained, and he couldn’t see it anyway. “It’s just supposed to… let you know I guess. I’m not as naive as I used to be to the ways of men, you know.

He spun to face her swiftly, an intense look in his eyes. Took one step closer but no more.

“Then you’ve..? With? You’ve…”

His eyes pleaded for her to understand, and to not refuse him an answer.

She shook her head. “No, but I know enough about it. I’m a virgin, not an idiot.”

His eyes widened as she blushed and looked away.

“I’m sorry, Kagome.” He repeated.

“It’s okay. I can’t even imagine what it’s like for a youkai.” She gave him a hesitant smile but still wouldn’t meet his eyes. “Just.. don’t scare me like that again, okay? I..” Her voice wavered and her lip trembled for a moment before she gathered herself. “Just don't, okay?”

He nodded and swept his hand back toward where he suspected the morning light would be wakening their comrades soon.

As they walked, a respectable amount of space between them, he whispered, “I was jealous yesterday.” And she replied, “I know.”


	5. Assumptions

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I've been reading over what I've written so far, and I'm excited about how much room there is to flush out the chapters later. I probably won't do it until I have the whole thing written so that I don't lose interest, though.

Paradigm Shift

Chapter Five: Assumptions

… … …

Kagome and Kouga sat outside, watching the sun come up and put the color back into the world. They each leaned against one of Ah-Un’s thick necks, the dragon youkai’s presence between them was a welcome barrier just then.

They didn’t speak, and they couldn’t meet each other's eyes, but it was a comfortable silence; for the most part, anyway. Kagome couldn’t prevent the flush across her nose and cheeks as her thoughts raced, and Kouga couldn’t prevent the periodic shifts between the want that he remembered feeling and the shame that he still felt at his would-be actions.

He would sneak glances at her face every few seconds, but avert his eyes when she turned to return the gaze. ‘ _this woman can forgive almost anything.’_ He thought. _‘I don’t deserve her any more than Inuyasha at this point, do I?’_

… … …

Eventually, the sounds of their companions beginning to stir reached them and lured them back inside. Sheets were folded and shoved to the bottom of Kagome’s bag. Odds and ends were gathered and readied for moving on. Idle chit-chat was exchanged between members of the group as they rubbed the sleep from their eyes.

Kagome had a grand time teaching Rin about toothbrushes and how to use them. Tinkling laughter echoed through the place as the little girl discovered the sensations of minty past on her gums and tongue, and the fresh feeling in her mouth after she finished. Shippou seemed entranced by her. Kagome felt a bit strange without his usual clinging to her, but she smiled to herself at their innocent intrigue with one another.

Turns were taken as they all took care of morning necessities, down in the passage that Kagome had used that night.

The women changed back into their traveling attire and bent double in laughter as Rin clutched her little dress to her naked body and, with no hesitation, ran full-tilt to the larger cavern to implore Sesshomaru for help dressing. She held the clean thing out to him in excitement; showing him how nice it looked now that it was fresh. She even went so far as to ask him to smell how nice the scent of Kagome’s soap was.

The regal youkai, somehow, still managed to look totally composed at her actions; utterly ignoring the amusement of the others in the air. Kagome especially noticed how deftly he dressed the girl with what was obviously a well-practiced routine. She turned as he shrugged it onto her arms and their hands worked together with ease to close the front and tie the green obi around her. _‘as though she’s his own daughter, and always has been. I’ve never thought of him as the dad type before.’_ It made Kagome’s eyes linger, and she wasn’t the only one.

Inuyasha seemed transfixed by his brother’s ease with the girl. He had scarcely moved from the place Kagome and Sango had seen him sitting after they had bathed the previous night. His eyes didn’t move from the domestic scene even once as it played out.

Kouga almost seemed startled at the image of the fearsome lord and his gentleness with the dainty human.

Sango’s glanced at them a few times, but her expression was as guarded as it always was unless she was alone with Kagome, and her face was unreadable.

Miroku politely kept his gaze from the ongoings, acutely aware of his reputation with them all and the girl’s age. That was one thing that he refused to have anyone ever think of him.

Kagome reveled in the quiet serene of the rare atmosphere and bent to lift her bag to her shoulder by the one strap that wasn’t frayed enough to threaten to separate from the bulk of her bag. _I really need to get a new backpack.’_ She startled and gasped as Sesshomaru’s warm palm closed over her fingers on the fabric, and she didn’t protest as her slack fingers slid out from under his when he lifted the burden from the ground. Her eyes were looking at him questioningly, but he gave her no answer as he carried the worn, yellow bag with him to the mouth of the shelter.

… … …

They walked for only a few minutes before Kagome jogged to Sesshomaru’s side and tried to keep pace a step behind him as she dug a handful of granola bard from her bag; he had easily secured it to Ah-Un’s saddle. It was by no means a hindrance to the strong dragon.

She made her way to each member of the entourage, offering them some breakfast as they began their trek in search of rumors of the shards. It was definitely an interesting sight, watching the most recent members experience the new and unusual food that she gave them.

… … …

Miroku saw the tension in Inuyasha’s shoulders as he walked a few paces ahead of them all, and idly wondered how long it would take until something or other set him off at someone. His money was on either Kouga or Sesshomaru, though past experience told him that it could easily be Kagome. His thoughts lingered over the behavior and undertones of them all in the chaos that this new dynamic was introducing to the group.

None of it bothered him much. If nothing else, he was adaptable. He’d had to be adaptable for most of his life; with his family’s, unorthodox though it was, task of finding and eliminating the evil man who had cursed their line.

He’d spent his younger years adapting to the life of an orphan even though he hadn’t been one at the time, then as he first began to enter adolescence as an actual orphan, the training he experienced to control his holy powers, taking up his family’s task for himself, and finally finding companionship with these friends.

Adaptable and observant. Those were qualities in himself that Miroku took pride in; even if most people only saw the more amorous part of his personality. Observing them all, he noted the unusually scarce attention that Kouga was giving Kagome, and thought on the snippets of a conversation that he hadn’t meant to overhear in his sleeplessness that night. Thoughts that led him to peek behind himself at where Sesshomaru led Ah-Uh a small distance behind the rest of them.

He took in how Sesshomaru walked at a pace that accommodated Rin, Shippou, and Kirara as they played in the lush grasses at the side of the dirt road they traveled. The youngest members of them were busily plucking the prettiest flowers from the long green blades, and picking out the most interesting stones to show each other as the little cat bounded around them in her task to terrify as many small bugs as she could manage to.

Distracted with watching the peaceful and happy actions behind him, his chest bumped into a smaller form and a mischievous mood overtook him, easily apparent on his face. _‘observant to one focus at a time, at least._ He chided himself.

Each of his arms came up to wrap around the shoulders of Sango and Kagome, placing himself firmly between them. He gave them each a grin to cover his clumsiness. He had meant to walk into them. Of course, he had. Yes.

“How lovely you both look in the morning light!” He spoke. “More inviting to gaze upon than even the beautiful wildflowers.” He leaned his face too close to Sango’s and inhaled deeply. “More deliciously fragrant than even the most glorious rose.”

He chuckled as they each pushed at his sides to move him from his proximity so close to them; completely nullifying each other's attempts. He didn’t budge. He _did_ slide his hand down Sango’s shoulder to her elbow and his wrist down Kagome’s similarly. The rings of his shakujo chimed delicately from the movement where he gripped it loosely in that hand.

He felt them both stiffen under his suggestive attentions. He watched Inuyasha’s steps falter for a moment before they sped up uncharacteristically. ‘ _he’s usually yelling at me by now.’_ Miroku kept the frown at Inuyasha from his face with great effort.

He decided to stir things up a touch and removed his touch from the women, clasping them both on his staff behind himself.

“Ah, such a shame that you could not indulge in the warmth of a spring last night.” He leaned in between them. “Though I suppose not _everyone_ was cold in that cave last night.” Kagome’s eyes widened as she felt his breath on her ear. Was he suggesting…? Had he been awake to hear..?

“After all! How grand it must be to not be so affected by the elements! Inuyasha is a very lucky man!” Kagome’s breath left her in a whoosh, only to catch in her throat with his next words and the fleeting brush of his hair on her neck as he leaned between them with a falsely innocent look.

“Kouga and Sesshomaru, too, of course.” She forgot to breathe for long moments as she looked out of the corner of her eyes at him and saw him doing the same to her.

“Perhaps one of you lovely ladies would consider sharing your warmth with me to ward off the chill, tonight?” His head swung between their faces fully, awaiting their response; though he already knew what was in store for him.

“In your dreams, monk!” Sango sped a few steps ahead and spun to land an open-handed blow across one of his cheeks.” He stood and left the space near Kagome and feigned hurt.

“Why, dear Sango! I would never suggest anything inappropriate! I merely offer a solution that would ensure our comfort! You and Kagome would both be welcome, of course! Anything to keep up our health! Such a shame it would be for one of us to fall ill in our travels.” He paused as Sango resumed her place by Kagome’s side, walking close behind them now.

“Of course that’s all you’re suggesting.” Her tone was thick with sarcasm and disbelief.

“I must admit that I’ve heard skin-to-skin contact to be the most effective in such situations!”

He knew it was coming, but it still stung his skin as two small palms connected forcefully with his face. He carried on smiling with false innocence despite the stinging, but he said nothing further.

Sango took hold of Kagome’s wrist and they sped up to increase the distance between themselves and him. He let the grin slip from his face with nobody watching him, and concentrated on their hushed voices at they talked.

“ _Can’t believe-“_

_“Yeah… Miroku-“_

_“Kouga.. join us?”_

He saw Kagome smile at Sango.

_“He… but… think he’s feeling… out. …me too… course.”_

They laughed. Miroku saw how forced Kagome’s laugh was though.

_“What of Sessho… he… us… not…”_

_“Don’t… maybe… yesterday… was strange.”_

Miroku lifted an eyebrow at the snippets of Kagome’s answer. Was she talking about yesterday after the battle and her mysterious disappearance with Kouga, or was she revealing some reason for why Sesshomaru had stood so intently at the entrance of the small cavern with the stream in it last night with his eyes narrowed into its depths? He was eager to puzzle out what interest the youkai lord had with whatever conversation had been taking place last night near the water.

He left the girls to their chat and slowed his pace until Kouga had passed him. He finally fell in step at Sesshomaru’s side, whistling a merry tune as he did.

He wasn’t spared a look from the imposing figure, but he just _knew_ that his actions must have stirred some amount of curiosity. Usually, he could out-wait anyone in this situation. He would wait and wait until the silence had stretches someone’s patience too thin and they snapped out some comment or question at him. He somehow felt that this wouldn’t work with the youkai lord.

He lifted a gloved hand to his lips and cleared his throat, gathering his word carefully.

“So.”

This time he did receive the smallest of glances from the other man.

“I’ve noticed that you’ve been remarkably…gentle… perhaps even _familiar_ with our innocent little miko.”

It took silent minutes for him to receive a reply. He had almost given up on attaining one.

“You are either very bold or very foolish.”

Miroku only smiled at him brilliantly.

“One cannot help but be curious.”

“They say that curiosity killed the cat.”

“Ahh, Lord Sesshomaru. Perhaps it is a good thing that I am not a cat.”

Sesshomaru gave a small grunt at that. They walked in chagrined silence once more, for a long time. Miroku had almost forgotten his little poke of fun until Sesshomaru finally countered it.

“You may be no cat, but you certainly make enough trouble to uphold the reputation of one, don’t you?”

Miroku began whistling his tune again and didn’t reply, but he felt a sort of pleased mood settle over him. Here was someone who recognized his actions for what they were; in some measure, at least. It pleased him mostly because, after all, it takes one to know one, doesn’t it?


	6. Moments

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Posted 1.12.2020  
> Unedited

Paradigm Shift

Chapter Six: Moments

… … …

The days passed over the next two weeks in a relatively mundane blur, aside from the occasional heated or confusing or strange… moments. At least… they might be mundane if she compared them to the whirlwind of _unusual_ that had preceded this leg of Kagome’s adventures in wonderland.

Moments of…

Some days that ended with Inuyasha pushing them all to go further than they could handle, even as darkness was beginning to set upon them. Sesshomaru ignoring him and announcing that he would not force Rin any further on those days. Sango thanking Sesshomaru quietly for the relief.

Inuyasha talking quietly to Sango as they prepared rabbits that Inuyasha had hunted for dinner one night. 

Rin riding on Kouga’s shoulders one day when she was exhausted from nightmares. Sesshomaru’s intently watching of them. Kouga’s terrified expression as Rin tells him of her nightmares. Wolves. Rin’s unexpected insight as she looks behind her at Sesshomaru, and her quiet whisper of, “Everyone changes, you know.” As she wrapped her thin arms around his head from her spot on his shoulders and _squeezed._

The broken wheel of a traveler’s cart and Kouga’s glance to Kagome before he lifts it up to inspect the broken rod that held the wheels together. Miroku’s gaze and his calmly explaining that it would be a simple fix. His hand on the old farmer’s shoulder; offering some sort of reassurance. Inuyasha bounding off to find a suitable replacement. Miroku securing the new axle and testing it for the man. The blood on one hand from a sharp piece of wood. How he refused to call attention to the wound even though she knew that he knew that they all knew about it.

Kouga’s regrowing confidence in her presence, and his small, hesitant touches on her elbow or shoulder. Him walking closer to her again.

All of the small things that spoke of how they were all becoming accustomed to each other. The newness of the group expanding wearing off as they settled into a fresh comradery.

… … …

On one rather miserable spring morning, rain persistently falling around them in a lazy manner, A small contingent of human soldiers marched toward them on the wide road that they were traveling.

It seemed significant, somehow, to Kagome that the whole group moved off to one side of the road instead of parting down the middle to make way for the men.

The youkai of the group all tensed when the men ground to a halt before them. Even little Shippou stood a step before Kagome in warning, and tiny flames licked at Kirara’s small paws where she stood vigilant at Sango’s side; threatening to reveal her larger form in Sango’s defense. The little flames grew as the men all faced Sango and knelt.

“Are you the Taijiya, Sango and her traveling companions?” One man at the head of the soldiers inquired of her. Sango only blinked owlishly at the man.

Kagome bent at the waist and peered around Inuyasha’s body at the scene. She saw how Miroku lingered over Sango’s astonished expression, and how his fist clenched tightly on the shaft of his Shakujo before he stepped toward the kneeling man.

“We are indeed Sango’s comrades.”

“We have come on behalf of our clan lord to secure the services of the Taijiya Sango.”

“Perhaps we should speak of this in a more comfortable setting, then?” Miroku proposed, looking over them all and bringing attention to the rain and mud. He caught Kagome’s eye as she watched him and shot her a smirk and a wink.

 _‘He’s definitely up to his normal tricks.’_ Kagome thought. _‘I suppose it’s a pleasant change from ominous clouds and exorcisms in convenient villages.’_

The men stood and, at a gesture from the man who spoke to them, began marching back the way they had come from.

“If you follow us, our compound isn’t far ahead.” Sango followed them with a curious look, her eyes silently asking the rest of them to go along with this. Kagome didn’t miss how Miroku took up the post at Sango’s elbow.

The trek was silent, but the man wasn’t lying when he said that their compound wasn’t far. They reached tall wooden gates around the next sharp curve of the road. A small path curved off to one side; presumably leading around the girth of the compound and it’s imposing walls. The main road led right up to the great doors.

A rope was tugged, and a head was poked over the top of the gates, and the gates were heaved open from inside.

Ah-Un was housed in the stables- near the end and safely away from the horses, where the soldiers assured themselves that their mounts wouldn’t be devoured. The rest of them were lead to a long, low building. It was the largest of the small array of structures inside the walls. They were shown around a covered walkway and into a side door, where they entered the building into what was obviously a receiving room for guests.

Shelves lined one wall and were filled with a selection of shoes; some drenched, others damp, and some enticingly dry. The man took his leave of them to fetch the man who had summoned them all, and they were left alone in the hall to divest themselves of wet footwear and muddy socks.

A small wooden tub was filled with water on the wall opposite the shelves of footwear with a stack of towels beside it, a bin of overflowing dirty towels was on the other side of the tub. They took their time ridding their feet, ankles, and calves of caked, half-dried mud. They were grateful for it.

When the soldier returned, he led them to yet another room. This one contained a single, long, low table and they knelt together at it along one side.

“What the hell is going on, Sango?” Inuyasha asked testily.

“How should I know!?!”

“Well, they asked for you! By name!”

Sango huffed, but any reply she may have given was forgotten as the door slid open to admit a tall, handsome man dressed in fine cloth. He only had eyes for Sango, and the smile he gave her was wide and genuine.

“Sango. It’s been far too long.”

“Uhm…”

“You don’t know him?” Kagome’s tone was part incredulous and part teasing as she knocked her elbow against Sango’s side.

“Uhm…” The man looked slightly irritated, but it gave way to weary acceptance in no time.

“I suppose you ought not to remember me. After all; it was nearly six years ago, and we were both children then.” He knelt across from them with almost as much grace as Sesshomaru possessed. “My father employed yours… and you.” His eyes looked far away as he spoke. “There was a youkai giving us much trouble at the time.”

“I do remember! The boy with the runny nose! Kuranosuke!” That same irritation and the same acceptance of Sango’s manner.

“Well. Yes. I suppose I was much different, back then.” Sango hummed an agreement. “I never forgot you though. So confident, so sure, so deadly… so beautiful.” Sango’s cheeks colored prettily at the compliment.” I knew at once that it should be you that I called upon when we were threatened once again.”

“You’ve called us to exterminate a youkai?”

“Yes. I hope your…” He glanced at the rest of them. “…Friends… don’t take offense?”

Inuyasha closed his eyes and put his nose in the air. Sesshomaru lifted one brow at the man. Kouga chuckled. If Shippou and Kirara had been listening to the conversation then they didn’t acknowledge the backhanded welcome.

 _‘Are the formal motions of this man’s false politeness so alluring to Sango that’s she’s being taken in by him so easily? Surely she hears the insults he offers?’_ Miroku’s eye twitched as Sango answered; skipping over his mentions of the powerful youkai in their party without pause.

“We’ve defended many villages from attacks in our travels, I’m sure that we could help you out with little inconvenience.”

“You will be compensated generously, I assure you.” He set a bursting pouch of gold coins halfway between them. Everyone's expressions mirrored each other in disbelief. It was a large sum that this clan lord offered them. Perhaps more than they had received from other villages in months, combined. Sango waved her hands wildly.

“That’s far too much!”

“You cannot refuse, my dear Sango. Your time is easily worth much more than this.” She folded her hands on the table and fixed her eyes on them to hide another flush.

Kuranosuke rose and opened the door, gesturing for them to follow him out of the room. Two servants waited demurely in the hall to greet them. They bowed as they waited for instructions.

“Aki,” He gestured the smaller of the two women closer. “Will show the women and children to one of the guest rooms on the northern side of the house. Chiyo,” The other woman stepped around him and settled near Inuyasha’s side without looking from the floor. “Will show the men to a room on the eastern side.”

“This is unacceptable.” Sesshomaru’s deep voice rang clear and commanding in the enclosed space. The two servant girls startled at it.

“Oh?” Kuranosuke’s tone betrayed his insulted demeanor at the announcement. Sesshomaru was a lord himself, and wouldn’t be intimidated by anyone, they all knew. Kagome’s fingers grazed his elbow and stayed there, from where she was completely dwarfed and hidden from sight behind him. They lingered softly, pressing the silk of his sleeve onto his skin with the barest hint of pressure. Sesshomaru’s elbow bent into her palm and across her wrist. He reached up to casually move his long hair behind him to cover the action and the strands tickled across Kagome’s nose.

“I will not have my ward separated from my side at night in such an unfamiliar place.”

Kuranosuke skimmed over Sango and lingered on Kagome from where she had peeked her head around Sesshomaru’s bicep. The crisp coolness of his garb felt pleasant on her cheek. She tried to ignore it. The agitation in his powerful aura caused his hair to curl some adventurous strands across her neck and arms, wrapping themselves around her back to tickle at her skin. She tried to ignore that too. She tried very hard, she really did. She was aware that Sesshomaru wouldn’t miss the shiver that ran through her.

“This youkai girl is your ward?” Kuranosuke looked amused.

“She must be quite powerful to appear so human. Only her attire and her eyes give her away.”

Kagome could hear the jingle of the rings as they bounced around the finial of his staff. She could just imagine him snickering into his hand. Inuyasha was sputtering and Kagome gaped at him.

Sesshomaru just stepped sideways to shield her from view again and his response startled her.

“Yes. As is the human child, Rin.” She scurried to his side and latched to the fabric of his hakama.

“Two wards, then.” The sarcasm was apparent to them all, but Sesshomaru chose not to raise the tension any further. “Very well, then. I will show you to a third room, personally.”

“Hang on. You can’t just-“ Inuyasha’s yell of outrage probably should have been expected, really.

“Silence, whelp.”

“You bastard! There’s no way-“

“Inuyasha,” The smooth tenor of Miroku’s voice interjected, hoping to stall whatever explosive fight that this was quickly escalating into. “Surely you wouldn’t object to Lord Sesshomaru keeping his _wards_ with him. He placed himself at an angle in front of the hanyou, effectively cutting him off from both Sesshomaru and Kuranosuke. “After all. In our travels, it is no different from when we make camp for the night. He _protects_ them, and it’s only right that he do what he thinks best for their _safety_ here too. He’s always a perfect gentleman to them and I’m sure that it will be no different than our sleeping arrangements in the elements. There’s no need to fret just because walls are separating them from us instead of trees.”

Inuyasha only grunted and turned to walk away.

“Fine. They’re his problem. I’ll find you all later.” Inuyasha removing himself from their company was becoming an increasingly common occurrence. Miroku gave Kagome a sly, suggestive waggle of his brows before smoothing his countenance and pivoting to smile calmly into the silence.

… … …

Kagome’s heart was pounding so hard against her chest so frantically that her throat felt like it was rhythmically constricting. Like she was being choked by it. Her knees felt weak, and the only thought that she could manage was a timid, **_‘what’_** She didn’t see the worried look that Sango gave her. Nor did she catch the hard line of Kouga’s mouth. Miroku’s lurid playfulness hovered in her mind, though. **_‘what’_**

She was still fairly numb as they all arrived at Sango, Kirara, and Shippou’s room. The little fox hopped to her shoulder and whispered in her ear. “I’ll be fine with Sango! Don’t worry, Kagome!” Sango squeezed her in a tight hug, probably trying to reassure her.

 _‘Things are getting weird again. Really weird. Just when I thought the weirdness was over. Really weird. Very weird. This is weird. And uncomfortable.’_ Kagome avoided looking at Miroku again as he was shown to the room that he would share with Inuyasha on a different side of the building. Only a few doors down from that one is where Kuranosuke gestured that she would be _sleeping with Sesshomaru_. **_‘No!_** Staying. _Staying with Sesshomaru. And Rin!”_ She was grateful to have a place to lay her bow and quiver. Even more grateful to have a cushion to plant herself on heavily.

Until Sesshomaru took the one next to her and just _sat there watching her._

Rin had wandered to a window in the room and was going on about the gardens that she could see outside, but the chatter of what the flowers looked like and their pretty color descriptions faded from Kagome’s attention as she turned her head. She fixed her eyes somewhere in the middle of his chest.

The silence between them only amplified the rushing sound of her blood in her ears.

“Kagome?” His voice only made her even more nervous.

 _‘What_ happened? _What’s_ happening? _’_

“Kagome.” His voice was more forceful this time. When she still didn’t say anything, he turned more fully to her and gripped her cushion to make her face him as well. She blushed as she let out an undignified squeak.

“Lord Sesshomaru…” She trailed off, not really knowing what to say. He sighed.

“Surely if you were so adamant about me using your name those weeks ago, you can do me the same favor?” This line of conversation wasn’t doing _anything_ to dispel her nervousness. She could feel that she was almost vibrating with it. “In private.” He amended. ‘ _Private.’_ She gave a single laugh at that, strangled though it was as her nervousness clashed with a tinge of amusement.

“Lord Sesshomaru!” Rin bounded to him and tugged on his collar. The sight was now familiar to Kagome, but it never failed to seem out of place, considering how he normally presented himself. Her amusement did rise some.

He unfolded himself and let Rin tug him to the window, pointing her arm and index finger through it and at the garden beyond.

“May I go to walk in the garden?”

“Hm.” He looked outside, bending slightly to do so. “Wait.” He said. He strode past where Kagome still sat stiffly and then through the door. Soon after, he reappeared with Sango and Shippou in tow. Rin’s eyes lit up and she hurried to Sango’s side, clasping her hand. Sango gave her a gentle look and nodded to Sesshomaru, glanced at Kagome’s back with worry, and walked off with both of the children.

Sesshomaru reclaimed his seat near her. Kagome cleared her throat before finally finding her voice.

“Is Sango taking them to the gardens, then?”

“Hm.”

“That’s nice. They’ll like that.”

“She has my permission to take Rin to bathe, as well.”

“Ah. That’s good.”

“Hm.”

Silence again. She took long, deep breaths to try to steady herself. She was _not_ calm enough to be ready for it when the pads of his fingers under her chin forced her head to tilt upwards. Though her face was in the right positing, her eyes stared defiantly off to one side. His fingers shifted to grasp the sides of her jaw.

“Surely you understand that I would do nothing inappropriate or untoward to you.” She stubbornly kept on denying eye-contact. She couldn’t stop the heat in her body from rising, though. “Think!” He demanded. His grip tightened. “Surely you heard the Monk’s words?” She didn’t realize that she had any blood left in her body that wasn’t already residing in her face and ears, but she felt faint when she discovered how wrong she was. To her utter mortification, a groan snuck its way past her lips.

Sesshomaru laughed and dropped his hand to his knee.

“His _words_ , girl. Not his _insinuations._ ” All of the breath left her at once. _‘What was it that he said? Something about sleeping arrangements? No! No…safety. Oh. Protection. Oh.”_

“I see that you are beginning to grasp the meaning behind my actions?” She was still horribly warm, and the heat that had settled in her refused to abate even as embarrassment replaced her previous nervousness.

“You want to… protect me?”

“Of course. Did you believe me to have other intentions?” He extracted one leg from under him and stretched it out beside her. His knee was bent near her shoulder and her head whipped sideways to look at it without her consent. As her eyes followed his leg slowly back to its origin, she swore to punish them. _“No no no. Bad eyes. Bad. I should carve you right out and find better… behaved… ones… …yeah”_ She redirected her scrutiny from his lap, back to his face. ‘ _Oh..my... He. He’s_ smirking _at me.’_

Sesshomaru made for quite a picture, his leg in that position, his mouth curved on one side into that smirk, leaning back on his arm like that.

“Uh.”

He shifted himself and moved his face very near hers, running his thumb down one side of her face. Another one of those groans stole out of her.

“Uh.”

He stood and moved away from her, deftly removing the armor and placing it in one corner of the room; next to her bow, she noted absently.

“No need to fear for your purity, Kagome. I have no plans to take advantage of” He looked over his shoulder to her. “your” His gaze swept across her. “attributes.”

“Oh.” He sat with his back to the wall under the window.

“I must admit to being gratified with your reactions to me. I may not wish to partake of your body but I am a man, after all, and the smell of you is welcome to my senses. I don’t mind coaxing it from you, do you?”

 _‘Am I actually having this conversation with Sesshomaru? I’d have to do more than make a noise or two for it to be considered a conversation, I guess… Oh crap. I can’t believe I made_ those _noises. Embarrassing!’_

Sesshomaru's eyes mercifully closed, and he rested the back of his head against the wooden panels behind him.

“You should find the bath house, _Kagome,_ I’m _sure_ you’re still feeling rather… _dirty.”_

She scrambled up and nearly stumbled in her haste to flee.

“Of course!” She hated how high her voice sounded.

“Of course.” She hated how deep his voice sounded, too.

… … …

With the door closed behind her, and a few steps away from it, _and him_ , she braced herself against the wall with one hand; the other clutching the fabric of her shirt over her pounding heart. Too late, she caught a glimpse of purple and black in the frame of a door near her. She moved away from the wall and clasped her hands behind her back. She tried very hard to pretend that nothing _strange_ had happened.

Miroku, however, was grinning in a way that reminded her of the Cheshire Cat. The full force of that grin was directed at her as he openly observed her from his post with one arm resting on the wood above his head. The thumb of his free hand pushed his bottom lip up over his grin, and his ankles were crossed. Overall, he looked entirely smug.

“Mhhmmm.” He hummed at her and turned to re-enter his own room. He closed the door softly and slowly behind himself, and she could hear his amused rumbles from behind it.

_‘Kami help me, I don’t know which one of them is worse. I’m not sure if me and Sango can handle so much of that kind of behavior. Down the rabbit hole we go.”_

The bath house was blessedly warm, and blessedly empty when she stepped into it.


	7. Intrusions

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Posted 1.12.2020  
> Unedited

Paradigm Shift

Chapter Seven: Intrusions

… … …

“It’s so quiet without everyone else”

“It is, but we’re not prisoners, Shippou. We don’t have to stay here in the room until night, and wait for the youkai attack. Sango picked the kit up under his arms and settled him onto her hip.

“Maybe we can explore!”

His enthusiasm drew a long, warm laugh from her.

“I’m not sure exploring someone else’s home is a good idea. They might be offended.”

“Well, what else is there to do?”

“Oh, I’m sure that we could find something to eat

“Inuyasha would be so mad if we ate without him!” His mischievous look wasn’t missed by Sango, but she continued without mentioning it.

“Or maybe find somewhere to wash up?”

“Can Kagome come with us?”

A knock on the frame of the door interrupted the conversation, and when they opened it to see Sesshomaru on the other side they were concerned.

“Is Kagome okay?” She asked. He tilted his chin up at her.

“Taijya. Kit.”

“Ahhmm…Sorry. Hello, Lord Sesshomaru. Is there something you need?”

“Rin would like to walk in the gardens-

“Oh! Oh! That sounds really fun!”

Golden eyes fixed an impatient look on the kitsune and he burrowed into Sango’s side.

“Rin would like to walk in the gardens, and I would ask if you would accompany her.”

“That sounds nice, Lord Sesshomaru.” She looked down at Shippou and he nodded energetically.

“I would also ask that you bring your weapon along.” The implication wasn’t lost on her.

“Ah. That sort of accompany. It’s no problem at all. I’m honored.”

“Yes. As you should be. I have some… matters to discuss with the miko, and prefer some privacy to do so.”

“Don’t let Miroku’s lecherous suggestions bother you, Lord Sesshomaru. He’s always like that.”

“Hm.”

“Should we go with you to fetch Rin?”

“Yes. You will keep her to the area of the gardens that I can oversee through the window in the room that we were provided.”

“That’s fine.”

When they stopped at a door and Sesshomaru opened it for them, Sango was only stopped from going to Kagome’s side by Rin quickly joining her and claiming her free hand. She hesitated. Lingered. Took in the tension in her friend’s back and shoulders, and the way her hands gripped the cushion under her so tightly.

She turned to walk Rin and Shippou to the gardens to play. She’d seen Kagome defend herself before, and Sesshomaru hadn’t shown hostility to anyone other than his brother.

… … …

Damn him, but he was curious. Miroku peered at Sango’s retreating back… and the lovely way her hips swung as she walked away. He left his Shakujo atop the futon that he had already set out and readied, and slipped from his own room His bare feet padded, as quietly as he could manage, to the third door past his own. He crouched down. He wondered why Sesshomaru hadn’t closed it more than halfway.

_‘Oh-ho! I have a co-conspirator, I see.’_

Miroku and Sesshomaru met eyes over Kagome’s head when he peeped through the opening, and Miroku wished he had the same level of self-control that the taiyoukai did. He had to pinch his nostrils together to keep his laugh from coming out and giving him away.

Sesshomaru glanced down at the obviously overwhelmed woman, and back up to Miroku. He gave the monk the barest of tilts sideways of his head, and Miroku pinched his nose harder. _‘Like an inquisitive dog. An inquisitive dog youkai.”_ He drew both lips together between his teeth and held his breath for a moment before exhaling as quietly as he was able.

Miroku put his thumb under his chin and pushed his own head upwards, then pointed at Kagome’s back. He was glad that Sesshomaru took the suggestion easily. He listened as the other man assured Kagome that he wouldn’t _attack_ her. _‘I’d ravish her if she were available.’_ He thought. _‘Damn me again, it really is fun to have a partner in crime.’_

When Sesshomaru mentioned him and his underlying teasing from earlier, and it drew a pretty noise from the woman in the room, Miroku felt the sound travel through his body in a streak of lightning. His fingertips tingled at it. Sesshomaru might be doing the teasing right now, but the idea that it was _his words_ in her mind when that delicious note left her… _‘My words, and my voice.’_ The thought of it pleased him.

And then, oh.. then her voice. He heard the tremble in it that his words had caused. She asked hopefully if he were offering protection. _‘My what naughty thoughts must have been in your mind to cause such dubious beliefs, Kagome. I never would have thought it of you.’_

A pang of hot jealousy washed over him as he watched the other man stretch his body so provocatively for Kagome’s perusal. _‘It’s been far too long since I’ve had a woman’s gaze upon me in that manner.’_

Miroku caught Sesshomaru’s hint as easily as Sesshomaru had caught his own hint moments ago, and when one stood, the other did as well. Miroku was only slightly disappointed that their game had ended so quickly. It had been a fun game, none-the-less. He couldn’t deny himself when the idea struck him, and he struck a salacious pose in the frame of his own doorway. It wasn’t long before Kagome rushed through, into the hallway. He guessed that he was using his full week’s supply of self-discipline to keep from outright laughing at the expression she wore as she became aware of him watching her.

He swept a satisfied look over her, from head to toe, and when he had his full he locked eyes with her. Hers were rather wide in astonishment as he hummed at her knowingly.

Once he closed his door, he hoped she would move quickly past his room; he didn’t think he could hold back the full force of his laughter for very long. As he waited for footfalls, the sound began to tumble from him. He was glad for the hurried steps as his laughs rose in volume.

When his door slid open and he turned to find Sesshomaru there, he absolutely shook at the self-assured look on the pale features of his recently acquired friend. _‘I never would have thought **this** of him either. Amazing, what you uncover about someone’s personality when you travel together.’_

They exchanged a mirthful look when Mikoku joined him in the doorway. They both looked down the empty hall where Kagome had fled, and wore the same mirthful expression.

When Miroku, recovered from his laughing fit, waved his hand into his room in an invitation, he was glad that Sesshomaru joined him. The door was closed behind them and they sat on the floor together.

“How precarious a position you coaxed me into with the girl. Did you know that she would react so readily to the attention?”

“I did not, but I admit that I had hoped she would.”

“Hm.”

Miroku nodded.

“You realize, of course, that I have no true intentions of pursuing her?”

Another nod.

“Hm.”

Sesshomaru laid flat on the floor, his arm cradling his head and one knee bent- reminding Miroku of the position that Kagome had so recently found herself in. It drew a snort from him in his place by his friend’s chest.

“Do you?”

“What?”

“Do you intend to pursue her?” Miroku watched the wood paneling of the walls and Sesshomaru watched the rafters in the pause.

“I’d never really considered it before.”

“Hm.”

“Kagome is full of love and light. She’s very innocent. That’s part of what makes teasing her so enticing.”

“Indeed. Toying with her so adamantly would be rather cruel, considering that.”

They both sobered.

“It would, yes.”

“Perhaps not so intensely, again.”

Looking down, Miroku understood the hard gaze that Sesshomaru was giving him in that moment. This was a man who, while indulgent in his own amusement at times, would protect the ones he considered loyal to him without mercy. He swallowed hard.

“Of course.” At Miroku’s answer, Sesshomaru stood and made his way to the door.

“Of course.” He replied to the monk.

They understood each other.

… … …

There was a tiny red butterfly on Rin’s nose, and she stared at it cross-eyed as she held her breath.

Sango was sitting in the grass in the gardens near her as Shippou watched the earthworm in his palm try to escape. The Koi swam nearby in a pond, filling the air with the sounds of rippling water interspersed with little splashes.

Rin _ever so slowly_ reached up a hand, one finger extended from her fist, fully intent on prodding the butterfly. It fluttered away while she was still halfway to its delicate wings. Her small breaths came in gasps as it faded from sight amongst the colorful flowers, and she giggled at Sango before skipping to Shippou’s side and lowering herself to the place in front of him.

Shippou scooted forward to her until their knees bumped and held out his hands for her to inspect.

Sango levered herself up, using Hiraikotsu as a brace to lean on. She circled the two little ones, eyes and ears alert for any dangers; fanning out to the edge of the enclosed space and listening at the low stone walls, peering into Sesshomaru’s empty room through the window, before going back to them again.

“You have my thanks, Taijiya.”

Sango turned in a full circle with Kiraikotsu at the ready, and relaxed at she spotted Sesshomaru perched lazily on the rooftop above the window she had just looked through.

“It’s eerie the way you can completely hide your aura like that.” She replied _‘and your movements, and your scent, and your appearance.’_ She added to herself.

“Rin.” He stood and walked off the edge of the rooftop, landing with a soft bounce on one foot. His stride toward Rin was uninterrupted by the fall.

“Lord Sesshomaru!” She stopped before him and proceeded to regale him with adventures of fuzzy caterpillars and lovely butterflies. He quieted her with a look, and she bounced on her toes happily.

“I am glad that you enjoyed the garden, Rin. Come. It is time for you to have a warm meal.”

“Oh! I’m hungry too! Can we go with them, Sango?” She scooped Shippou into her arms and walked with the other two to bring their questions to a servant.

… … …

Kagome spotted a few plain white yukata folded neatly on a chair near the large, inviting basin. She sighed happily, feeling most of the tension leave her body, and made short work of peeling her dirt-stained school uniform from her body.

She cringed for a moment at the sound of bubbles rising from the water. _‘They must have just heated it.’_ She thought. _‘I might have to wait for the wood to burn down some before I can get in and bathe.’_ Her eyes spotted a dozen or so twine strings hanging from the rafters above the tub and followed them down to little bunches of herbs that were commonly used as soap in this era. She stood on tiptoe to reach up to where they hung, one hand braced on the edge of the wood encasement.

Movement caught her eye below her and she shrieked in surprise and frustration. _‘Oh no, not again. Why do I keep ending up in these positions?’_ The water sloshed against the sides and spilled out over the top, soaking the purple lace of her bra and underwear. The black silk butterfly that hid the front-clasp dripped water onto her ribs and she scrambled for one of the white yukata and hurriedly put it on. She spun to face the closed door and grasped the handle with one hand, covering her eyes with the other; even with her back to the water.

She had only pulled the door open a crack when a large, tanned, clawed hand fell on it above her head- the weight forcing it to close it again.

“Mmm. Don’t leave on my account, Kagome.” Kouga’s voice was far too close to her ear which meant that his body was far to close to her back, and she stubbornly thought of anything other than the fact that he would have to be naked to be in the water.

The hand slid from the door, and she heard a tell-tale series of splashes from behind her as he lowered himself back into the warmth.

She flung the door open, hitting herself in the shoulder with it as she rushed out. As she turned to slam it closed, the sight of Kouga’s broad chest and shoulders, dripping with moisture, burned itself into her memory. He had one hand on the wooden edge of the basin and was leaning on it, the other hand on his hip, and a wicked gleam in his eyes.

_‘It’s because there are too many of them now. That’s why. There were two men in the group and now there are four. Far too many! I’m outnumbered!’_

Her forehead landed forcefully on the outside of the bath house door, and she heard his throaty laugh from inside.

“Don’t worry Kagome. I’ll restrain myself.” It was muffled but clear through the wooden barrier.

_‘Yep. He’s the big bad wolf, I’m little red riding hood, and he wants to eat me.’_

“I promise that I won’t bite, Kagome.” It echoed her thoughts entirely too well, and she groaned loudly in frustration.

The door opened and she stumbled in with only half a second to curse herself for keeping hold of the handle. She fell hard against his slick chest, her hands sliding down his sides from where she had tried to steady her footing. Those strong hands found her shoulders in an almost painful grip as a familiar rumble traveled up through him to her ears. He pushed her a step back from him and held her shoulders briefly to let her stand properly on her own, then slid his hands to her upper arms and squeezed them gently.

He let go of her and turned his own back, tying the yukata closed. She could hear his heavy breathing as he tried to hold himself together.

When he was sufficiently covered, he laid his damp palm on her cheek and looked at her seriously.

“I hope that I didn’t scare you again.”

She shook her head.

“Just startled. I didn’t see you when I came in.”

“That’s good then. I don’t want to scare you.”

“I know.”

He leaned over and pressed a lingering kiss to her hair, inhaling her scent deeply as he did so. As he slid by her and out through the door, she thought. _‘Yep. Too many males.’_

She poked her head out the door to make sure he had gone- she was drawn out of the steam by something else entirely. A slender white youkai had flown above the treetops before diving back down again. Shinidamachu.

‘ _Kikyo.’_

The thought of the undead priestess was enough to quell anything in her, and she went back inside numbly. As she lowered herself into the warm bath and began to methodically scrub her hair and body, she wondered if the Shinidamchu… and Kikyo… were the reason that Inuyasha has been so distant… and so absent, lately.


	8. Shift

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Because so much can happen in a single day.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Posted 1.13.2020  
> Unedited

Paradigm Shift

Chapter Eight: Shift

… … …

The cool spring air of the afternoon felt nice on his heated flesh as Kouga walked around the main house’s covered walkway. He clenched the bundle of green and white fabric in his left hand. Little flecks of dirt fell from it and onto the floor as he did so.

He spotted Sango and Sesshomaru, with Shippou and Rin in tow, talking with one of the house servants at the corner of the walkway as it turned around the house, he hurried his pace and found himself standing with them quickly.

“Thank you, Aki.” Sangos turned her head to Kouga and then back to the girl.

Aki nodded, eyes downcast and hands cradled gently before her. Sango turned the way that Kouga had come from and took in his damp, plain, white yukata. She pointed in the general direction and looked at Aki.

“Bath house that way.” She received another nod.

“Kitchens that way.” She pointed through the wall to the side of them and received another nod.

“Night soil closets on the other side of the gardens?” Another nod.

“Thank you again, Aki.” Another nod.

“Nice to know where everything is for the night.” Kouga patted the servant girl on the shoulder with one hand. She flinched away from the touch but didn’t move away otherwise. “Glad I stumbled in on you the conversation.” He gave a roguish grin.

As footfalls sounded, they all looked around the corner to the approaching figure of Kuranosuke.

“Ah! Sango! I’ve been trying to find you. I would appreciate the chance to speak with you privately.”

Sango turned back to them. “Could you take Shippou, as well? I’ll catch up soon.” Shippou already had one of rin’s hand in his own. Sesshomaru nodded as she turned from them and made her way to the clan lord’s side. They left the shade of the walkway’s cover and stepped along an inset series of large, smooth stones that curled away through the gardens and on toward a small bridge. It hovered over a thin stream that had been carved out of the grounds; it carried water to the small koi pond.

Sesshomaru faced Kouga with a lifted brow and looked pointedly at the hand that he had hidden behind his back. Kouga’s roguish grin was back in a flash and her brought Kagome’s clothes into view. “I ran into her at the bath house.” Sesshomaru’s eyes narrowed. “She was coming in as I was leaving. I figured I’d get her clothes washed. I think she’ll like it.”

“I can take care of that for you.” Aki’s small hands laid over Kouga’s curled fingers and the fabric. He relinquished it to her. “If there is nothing else, sirs?”

They didn't say anything and she hurried away to her task.

Kouga made to continue on his way to his room, and was brought short by the chill in the taiyoukai’s voice and the bruising grip on his shoulder.

“Your life is forfeit to me if you force your… affections… on her again.”

“I understand.”

Heaviness washed over them.

“I did apologize.”

“Not nearly enough.”

“I know. There’s no way that I could ever apologize enough for that.”

“Indeed.”

The air thickened as the hand left him.

“I didn’t realize that you saw us.”

“I did not. I heard enough to know that you were too… occupied to notice my attention.”

Kouga hesitated, and when he spoke his words were slurred into the hand that covered his weary face.

“You would have stopped me.”

“Of course.”

“Good. Thanks.”

He heard the trio continue on their way, and something in his chest faltered. _‘Just because she forgives me doesn’t mean that I’ll forgive myself. It doesn’t mean that anyone else would forgive me either. Or that they should.’_ His feet felt glued to the spot, but he moved one foot and walked on, much more sedately than before, toward the receiving hall and onward to his room with the two other men.

… … …

When the door slid open sedately and Kouga entered the room, Miroku was still sitting where Sesshomaru had left him. His contemplations were interrupted by the gruff hello from the wolf.

“Welcome back. Perhaps you can point me toward the bath as well?” Miroku picked at his robes uncomfortably.

“Kagome’s using it right now.”

“All the more reason!” His enthusiasm was tempered by the remembrance of a hard golden stare, but he did his best not to show it.

“Keep your hands to yourself, idiot.”

Miroku wondered at the tiredness in Kouga’s voice. He watched as Kouga took brought one of the mats from against the wall and set it out for himself. His curiosity was piqued.

“Is there something or your mind, my friend?” He patted his hand on the floor beside himself.

Kouga heaved a great sigh and took the offered stretch of floor.

“You could say that.”

“Care to talk about it?”

“Sesshomaru is pretty pissed.”

“Ah. With you?” Miroku cast his look sideways at the other.

“Yep.”

“And how might you have earned his ire?”

Kouga flinched and looked away.

“Would it have anything to do with our Kagome?”

“How the hell did you know that?” The surprise and suspicion coated his features as his blue eyes bore into violet.

“Ah. It seems that Kagome’s wellbeing is a popular subject today.” He stood and retrieved his Shakujo from its perch. “This wouldn’t be concerning a certain cave with a certain stream in the middle of a certain night, would it?”

Kouga blanched at the question.

“Who the fuck else knows?”

“I’m fairly sure that I was the only one awake to observe Lord Sesshomaru’s actions.”

“Just his, huh?”

“I may have caught a word or two.”

Kouga grimaced at Miroku’s feet as they stepped closer to him.

“What?”

“Oh, just something about you being upset at her.”

Kouga fell backward onto the floor gracelessly.

“And something about jealousy. Her telling you that she knew.”

“I guess it’s all that holy monk training that makes it so that you can keep your heartbeat and breath steady enough to pass for being asleep, huh?”

“Maybe.”

Miroku slid the door open and had one foot over the threshold.

“Don’t bother her, Miroku. I mean it.”

“Wouldn’t dream of it, dear man.” His eyes danced with amusement as he left. He didn’t close the door.

… … …

“I could never quite forget you, Sango. As I grew up I knew that when I took a wife, I would be sure that there would be more than duty between us. I want a woman whom I can love and who can love me in return. Your face is the one that has always been on my mind during those thoughts.”

“I’m flattered, my Lord.”

He took her hand and tugged her toward the railing of the little bridge. They stared into the water rushing by them for a moment. He still had her hand in his where they sat, joined, on the red polish of the wood.

“Please, Sango. You don’t need to call me Lord. Just Kuranosuke is fine. Or whatever else you might wish to call me.” He released her hand, and turned toward her; leaning on his elbow as he watched her face. “Husband, perhaps. I have, admittedly, dreamed of the word in your beautiful voice.”

Sango raised her hands to her cheeks as they warmed. _‘So charming.’_

“Well, you see…”

… … …

Miroku jumped, more than he would have admitted to, as hands were laid on his back and a voice sounded in his ear.

“Ah-Ha! Gotcha!” He looked over his shoulder at his assailant and frowned at the mock whisper. He didn’t miss the hint of purple on her chest that could be seen through her damp yukata.

“And what, exactly, have you _gotten_ me for, Kagome?”

“I just _knew_ you had feelings for Sango! Now here you are spying on her!”

Miroku shuffled a little backward from the woman. It was awkward to do while crouched down like this behind a cluster of reeds near the bridge. _‘Buddha preserve me, I’ve seen that gleam in her eyes before. She’s planning mischief.’_ He turned back around to watch the backs of the two figures again, hoping he didn’t miss anything important.

“… obligations. Other people that I have to take care of and things that I need to see through.” Sango was saying. In her mind, she thought _‘Like Kohaku. Rebuilding what might be left of my home. Finding and **killing** Naraku.’_

 _‘Maybe one of those other people is Miroku.’_ Kagome wondered.

 _‘She won’t leave Kagome’s side while Naraku is out there.’_ Miroku knew.

He rolled his shoulders uncomfortably at the persistent warmth coming from Kagome’s hand on his back as she listened with him. He shifted, and her hand slid over to rest fully on his left shoulder blade as she shifted with him. ‘How innocent your touch is, Kagome.’

He wasn’t used to women touching him so familiarly without his guidance. Kagome did it every now and then; a smile and a brush of her fingers on his hand when he fell into a dark mood, or a hug when they overcame a particularly difficult foe, or a bump of her shoulder on his on clear, sweet days as they walked down some unnamed road.

He knew that she was a very physically affectionate girl; in a way that was the polar opposite of his own physical attentions. He knew that she did not limit her actions to any particular member of their bunch. Every time she did, despite his understanding of those things, it unbalanced him a little.

… … …

“If you wish to travel until your obligations are fulfilled, I would have no objection. I would trust in your fidelity and I assure you that I would be just as faithful to you.”

“You make it sound so romantic, Lord Kuranosuke. It’s not though. What sort of life could a husband and wife expect to have like that?” He hung his head at her words.

“It’s not that I object to you… just… maybe in another life, it could have worked. A simpler life.”

“If you ever change your mind, Sango…”

“You would wait for me?”

“I would wait for you.” He had leaned his face close to hers intently. Her head lifted towards his.

… … …

Miroku felt the wetness through his robes as his knee slipped into the water as he watched them. He looked down at the edge of the stream and tried to back away from it. Kagome’s knee pressed into his lower back as he attempted it, halting his efforts to save himself from a cool dip of embarrassment. She shifted for him, and he shifted with her as her hand came to rest on his own knee. He met her concerned eyes and tried his best to convey his reassurance to her.

When they looked back to the bridge, Sango had lifted herself onto the balls of her feet and pressed a chaste kiss to Kuranosuke’s lips. It was short, and they walked off of the bridge in separate directions.

Kagome couldn’t find anything to say to Miroku, so she rubbed little circles on his back. She settled for simple.

“I’m sorry.”

He stood and she followed.

“For what?” His eyebrows knit together in puzzlement.

“Sango… she seemed happy that he said he’d wait for her.” She waved a hand at the bridge.

“Ah.” Miroku smiled softly down at her slight body, so much smaller than his own.

“She kissed him…” Kagome continued.

“She did.”

“It must have upset you.”

“Not overly.”

“Oh.” She was confused.

“It didn’t?”

He shook his head at her.

“But… you were here watching them, all jealous and sneaky.” She grinned half-heartedly at his antics. It wasn’t the first time she had caught him trying to snoop about.

Miroku threw his head back and laughed sharply. When he finished, he wrapped am arm around Kagome’s shoulders and began to lead them away from the tall reeds. When he caught sight of a few Shinidamachu weaving through the trees in the distance, he spun them both before her eyes could leave his own face.

“Let’s talk in the gardens for a little while.”

“Alright…”

They followed the stream to where it bubbled over stacked stones in a trickling miniature waterfall and fell into the koi pond. Miroku plucked a voluptuous pink lily from its pad in the water and placed it in her hands.

“You have the wrong impression of me and my _sneaking_ , as you put it, this time.” He told her. Her nose scrunched up.

“Are you sure?”

“Mhm.”

“But, Miroku.”

“Yes?”

“You’ve always paid so much attention to her… I was sure that you liked her.”

Miroku chuckled and sat on the grass. He tugged at her wrist and she sat next to him. He laid flat on his back and watched the clouds as he spoke.

“I can’t deny that Sango is very attractive. Her face, her body,” He winked at her. “Her dedication, her strength. These are all things that draw me to her, of course.”

“Why are you guys always confusing me?”

He lifted a brow at her, but she just shook her head.

“Just because I find her attractive, in many ways, does not mean that I am contemplating a future with her.” He chuckled again. “Otherwise, I would be pursuing every pretty, kind woman that I came across.”

“You _do_ pursue every woman you see.” Kagome joined him and laid back to laze in the grass as the afternoon began to fade to evening. She noted in the back of her mind that night, and the upcoming battle, would be upon them soon.

“Perhaps.” She could hear the smirk in his voice without needing to see it.

“You do.”

“Maybe. That still doesn’t mean that I was intending to court her.”

“Miroku! You were always groping her and, and..suggesting..”

He lifted himself on one elbow and peered down at her with that familiar smirk.

“You can’t deny that I’ve done the same to you, Kagome.”

She scowled and pushed at his chest with one hand. He laid back down beside her as she sat up. She twisted around to pin him with her annoyance.

“Not nearly as much, you letcher.”

He sat up as well, and pulled her back to his chest, cradled between his legs, and put his chin on her shoulder.

“Are you telling me that you want more attention, Kagome?”

She struggled out of his grip and scooted back to his side with a hard backhand to his chest. It was forceful enough to draw an _oomph_ from him as he doubled over.

“Be serious, Miroku.” He rubbed his abused chest.

“I’m always serious, Kagome. Just say the word and I am at your mercy.”

“Miroku!”

He reached over and tucked her hair behind one ear, letting the silken tresses cascade over his hand as he did.

“I am not like Inuyasha, Kagome. I won’t put her heart in a difficult position when I cannot offer her any promises.” She glared into the little pond as though she could bring about the demise of the swimming fish with her gaze alone.

“It doesn’t hurt that Sango doesn’t hit nearly as hard as Inuyasha when my hands wander.”

He was pleased to see that he had drawn a small smile from her with that. He fixed his face into his very best blank expression.

“Or Sesshomaru.”

She launched one of the stones near her feet into the pond, scaring the poor fish and sending them scattering.

“What’s that about, anyway. He’s being so _weird._ ”

Miroku bit his tongue to keep his crafted mask up. Her tone was adorably petulant.

“Kagome.”

She rested her cheek on her knees and looked over to him.

“You don’t know why?”

“All I know is that he’s been weirdly possessive of me.”

“I wouldn’t say _possessive_ but I could see how his actions could be interpreted so.”

“Seems pretty possessive to me.”

“It’s more accurate to call him protective.”

“Okay. But why? It’s not like he ever acted to any of us before a few weeks ago.”

“Kagome. You underestimate the implications to his station that came with your warning those few weeks ago.”

“Ugh.”

This time it was his turn to rub circles onto her back. And lower back. And…

“UGH! MIROKU!”

Kagome lept to her feet and threw another small rock that she had been holding at his head and strode away in her temper.

Miroku watched her leave with his fingers pressed to the spot above his eye where it had hit him. _‘I’m not sure if that’s better than a slap or worse. New, at least.’_

… … …

Dim light filtered through the trees. It bathed the two people that stood in a tight embrace below the boughs with a soft glow. The kiss was passionate and long, but any witness would wonder at the lie of it if they looked close enough. Somehow, the participants looked angry, rather than absorbed, with the kiss.

… … …

Back in the room that she would be sharing with Rin, Kagome laid out two mats side-by-side, and a third across the room; under the window. She curled up on one of the paired mats and drew a rough blanket all the way up under her chin.

If she wasn’t going to get any sleep tonight, she was going to take a nap while she had the chance. She was exhausted, anyway. In no time at all, she was resting peacefully.

Not long after, Rin was in the room with her; dragging the third mat to the other side of the empty one and snuggling down on it with a similar blanket; leaving the mat between them empty.

… … …

Silence was the only thing exchanged between Inuyasha, Kouga, and Miroku three doors away. They were all lost in their own thoughts as they waited for dark to come and distract them.

… … …

Sango curled around Shippou and Kirara, her mind and emotions too turbulent to sleep, offering her comfort to the bundles in her arms.

… … …

Kuranosuke stood vigilant in the tower by the gates of his stronghold, soldiers to either side of him, staring out into the distance in anticipation.

Aki and Chiyo folded the freshly washed clothing bundles and distributed them to their owners.

… … …

Sesshomaru trailed his long fingers over the surface of the warm water, his hair swirling about him in the bath; looking ethereal as it flowed sinuously in the small currents created by his hand.

… … …

Red fabric and black strands fluttered in a strong breeze as the sun neared the edge of the horizon.


	9. Hard Truths

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Posted 1.13.2020  
> Unedited

Paradigm Shift

Chapter Nine: Hard Truth

… … …

It was a restless night, waiting for the attack to come. Kagome had woken from her nap a few hours after she had settled in. Blinking away the heaviness in her lids that told her she had most surely nit rested for long enough, She tightened her arms around Rin and Shippou. _‘I wonder when they snuck in here with me.’_

A glance around the room proved them to be alone, and she gently slid out from under the twp precious bundles. She tucked them in snugly and peered into the hallway outside of the door. Empty. She crossed to the window and inspected the garden beyond, as well. Also empty. _‘Wait. What’s that sound?’_ The rustle of silk had been brief, but it sounded close.

She pushed herself up on the window’s edge and braced her pelvis against it, bending outside and trying to squint through the darkness closest to the stretch of the long walls on either side of the house.

Sesshomaru couldn’t resist the opportunity that he was presented with. She looked absurd propped out of the opening like that. Her head was perfectly in place below him, and he tapped it with the toe of his shoe. She nearly tumbled out. As it was, her legs waved wildly inside of the house, while her hands saved her from learning just how Inuyasha felt when she was angry.

“Did you sleep well?” Sesshomaru was sure that she hadn't heard the breath of a laugh as it escaped him. Her answer was rather garbled, and he put his chin on his bent knee to look down at her predicament. The foot that had accosted her head was still dangling innocently from the rooftop.

“Can’t… breathe.” She struggled to right herself and look up at Sesshomaru, but couldn’t manage it. She braced her pride for a topple into the grass. Try as she might, levering herself back inside wasn’t going to happen and she knew it. _‘Stupid gravity. Stupid center of balance. Stupid Sesshomaru’s foot.’_

She let her head fall and hang where gravity dictated, defeated. Her legs stuck out behind her, and she prayed that nobody would come through the door inside.

“Help.” She whispered, knowing that he could hear. The ledge was digging into her lower abdomen painfully.

“Sesshomaru.” She whined his name and he had to force down another little laugh.

“I know you can hear me!”

He stepped off of the roof and let himself land in a crouch by her, pulling back the curtain of her hair and looking into her face.

“What are you doing?” He asked in a monotone.

“This is your fault.” She blew a stream of air into his face. It ruffled his bangs.

“I ought to leave you here for that.”

“You wouldn’t!”

“Hm.” He tugged on her hair and she shifted, threatening to topple to the ground again. She renewed her efforts to keep her arms flexed so that she wouldn’t fall.

“Ugh.”

“Hm.”

“You’re such a bully.”

He scoffed.

“You are. You just found a different way of picking on us.”

“It is not preferable to swordplay and acid whips?”

“Ugh. I’m not sure right now.” She was pretty sure that her circulation was being impeded and she was losing feeling in her toes.

“Can I get up now?”

“If you like.” He released her hair and stood back. She stared helplessly at his knees.

“Sesshomaru!”

“Hm.”

“Help me up!”

When she felt his hip against her ribcage and his arm wrapping around her middle, her relief only lasted until his hand landed on her breast. She balked.

“Stop helping!” He released her quickly.

“My apologies. It was quite unintentional.”

Kagome tried to nod, but it made her head hurt.

“What do you suggest?”

“Grow another arm.”

“That will take a considerable amount of time, I assure you.”

“I feel like my face is falling off.”

She felt his fingers brush her back and a tugging. He’d grabbed a fistful of the white yukata she still wore and was lifting her by it. As she came up off of the wood, her arms and hands flailed at her chest, trying to keep the fabric from sliding off of her. Her legs dragged along the window as she was pulled through it. _‘Great, now I’m dangling in the air instead of dangling out the window.’_

“Bully.”

“I could drop you.”

“Bully!” Her hand pushed against his chest. She swung back and forth a little.

He lowered her to the ground slowly, and she made sure her feet and hands were under her. When he let the back of her yukata go, she climbed to her feet and adjusted it around herself self-consciously.

“You should be more aware of your surroundings, Kagome.” He said absently, looking in the window at Rin and Shippou.

“I heard you! I just couldn’t find you… and I didn’t know it was you…” She rubbed her stomach. “Ow.”

“Where is everyone? I didn’t want to leave the kids alone.” She asked.

“Sulking, I believe.”

His words made her laugh. She rested her palm against his armor for a moment before pointing into the sky.

“It’s really dark now.”

“Yes. If the human is correct, the attack should come presently.” Kagome nodded.

“The girl, Aki, left your clothing in the hall. Rin has already been dressed.”

Kagome looked him over, noticing that his own attire was also free of the layers of mud that they had all trekked through.

“It’s nice to feel clean, again.”

“It is indeed. You should dress. That yukata is not the best choice for battle wear. Not that your typical choice of battle wear is sensible.”

Kagome glared at him and flung a leg back inside the room. She straddled the ledge and tried shimmy through without too much discomfort.

“Do you require assistance again?”

“Don’t you dare!” She pointed at him and finally got into the room, hop-skipping on one leg for a few steps before finding her balance. She gathered her clothing from the hall and stepped behind a tri-fold dressing screen to change. When she came out with the yukata folded, Sesshomaru reached his arm into the room, picked her shoes up from where they rested below the window and offered them to her.

“Thanks.”

The door slammed open, startling Rin and Shippou awake, and Inuyasha filled the frame.

“Inuyasha!” She scolded.

“Come on. Everyone is getting together outside to wait.”

He barely spared any of them a glance as he walked away.

Kagome gathered her bow and quiver, slinging them over a shoulder, and herded the smallest of their company out through the door. Sure enough, all of the rest had congregated near the gates of the compound. She jogged to the group and heard Sesshomaru directing Aki and Chiyo to keep Rin and Shippou on the steps of the main house with them.

… … …

“Perhaps it would be wise to meet the attacker _outside_?” Sesshomaru gestured at the buildings and occupants that surrounded them. They all felt rather sheepish as he leaped over the wall without waiting for them.

“That’s probably a good idea, actually.” Sango agreed. She started up the ladder of the tower where Kuranosuke and the gate guards waited.

“Heh! It’s not like we haven’t waited for them to come to us before!”

“That is true, Inuyasha.” Miroku smiled. Inuyasha looked smug and tucked his arms into his sleeves. “However, many villages have been damaged because of it.” Miroku backed up a few steps and shouted up the ladder where Sango had disappeared. “Have them open the gates for us?”

“They’re already working on it!” Came her reply.

Miroku didn’t lower his head back down as she descended the ladder. He _did_ walk quickly out of reach of her Hiraikotsu one she noticed, though.

The gates cracked open, and they made their way out meet whatever had been terrorizing these people. The dark silhouette rose from the trees with a mighty roar and charged toward the gates. Miroku observed as the thing barreled toward them, and reached a hand inside his robes.

“This is no ordinary youkai.” He said. “See how it moves _through_ the trees?”

Sango sprinted forward and swung her weapon hard, using its inertia to aid her jump into the air. She twisted abruptly and launched the sharpened, curved bone at the bear’s head. It struck hard, and the beast stumbled sideways.

“He’s right.” She said hastily. “Look. Not one tree was disturbed.”

“We have to-

“It doesn’t matter. Hiriahotsu landed on it. It can obviously be fought.” Sango’s voice trampled over Miroku as she reached into the air for her weapon’s return. The others moved away from her as it came close. She caught the strap and bent her knees as the force pushed her back a step.

Sesshomaru was far ahead of them all, nearer to the line of the trees and the bear youkai. He made no move to attack it or defend himself as it lunged at him. A swift jump and he landed closer to them.

Miroku pulled a sutra from the folds of his robes. It had cleared the trees and was only seconds from them, now. Inuyasha gave a great cry and ran at it, the transformed Tetsusaiga trailing along beside him. He shot into the air above its neck and brought the sword down hard, nearly cleaving its head from its shoulders. It fell.

“Well, that wasn’t too hard. It was pretty weak.” Inuyasha walked toward them casually.

“You don’t understand!” Miroku yelled in agitation. “Inuyasha! Move!” A giant paw smashed into the hanyou, throwing him to the right, and he bounced across the ground hard.

Whisps of what looked like shadow or black smoke had woven the bear’s head together as if nothing had happened. They flared around it as it rose back onto its feet slowly, snarling loudly enough to remind Kagome of a train car.

Sesshomaru’s hand pushed at Kagome’s back. “Shoot it.”

“Huh? Oh! Alright.”

Miroku took two wide steps away from the others, coming to Kagome’s side. She nocked an arrow and pulled the bow taut. The beast took one mighty, menacing step forward. Its shoulders rolled as it did, blotting out the moonlight that fell on them. Then another step and Kagome could see Miroku reaching out to her.

“Wait.” He smoothed his sutra on the shaft of her ready arrow. “It never hurts to double your advantage.” He retrieved another sutra and she took aim. A spark of pink lit at the tip of her arrow.

A line of light streaked through the air, across their line of sight, from the right. It exploded and consumed the bear on impact, licking around the massive figure and reducing it to nothing in seconds. In the fading illumination of the arrow, they saw Kikyo at Inuyasha’s side. His head was held in one hand, the other gripping the still transformed sword on his other side.

Kagome ran back through the gates, hair fanning behind her, and came to a stop at the base of the guard tower. Her bowstring was still taut, the arrow pointed at the dirt near her foot. She leaned heavily on a support post of the tower.

… … …

“Idiot.” Kouga spat at the far off figures. Sango turned blazing eyes to him.

“I noticed that _you_ didn’t even move to _try_ to help.” He shrugged in response, looking over his shoulder to the opening of the gate.

“It’s pretty stupid to do anything that the mutt does.” He made his way through the opening, leaving Sango to her irritation. She spun to Miroku.

“If you knew that it was a shade, then why didn’t you say anything!?”

He was calm as she yelled at him.

“Would you have listened?” He asked simply.

… … …

Kouga stood behind Kagome and reached his arms around her. He grasped her wrists in his hands, and gently dragged them together, relaxing her bow. One hand slid down hers to the arrow and took it from her slack fingers.

He was slow and cautious in his movements as he felt the press of her back to his chest with every heaving breath that she drew.

His grasp on her other wrist was steady, and he replaced the arrow in the quiver by his leg. Its strap was hanging her from the crook of her elbow and it swung lightly from its perch there. The now empty hand came back up to join her bloodless knuckles on the bow, gently pushing his fingers under hers and transferring the weapon to his own hand. He dropped it into the dirt behind him.

He brought that hand back again, and pressed his palm to hers, intertwining their fingers as he finally released her other wrist. He squeezed her hand until she had caught her breath, and then released it so that he could turn her into his chest. Her hands came up to wrap around his elbows as a dry sob clawed its way out of her.

He pulled her shoulders closer and put his chin atop her bent head.

“He’s an idiot.” It only made her begin to shake in his arms.

Kouga slanted his eyes and looked at Miroku standing by them when he felt the hand on his shoulder. Miroku gave him a somber nod, and then completely shattered the humble persona as he removed his hand from Kouga’s shoulder, squeezed the air with a grin, and shook a finger at him with an exaggerated frown. Kouga rolled his eyes at him. Miroku gave Kagome a tender look as he strode past them.

“I knew, you know.” Kouga pulled back from her a little, and looked down, trying to catch her eyes.

“Knew what, Kagome?”

“I knew that she was here. I saw her soul stealers at the bath house.” Her forehead hit his chest. If the armor hurt her, she didn’t show it.

“He’s an idiot.”

“I think she’s why he’s been gone so much.”

“He’s an idiot.”

“He’s right, miko. Inuyasha’s folly knows no limits.”

Sesshomaru placed his hand at the small of Kagome’s back and pressed his fingertips into her, coaxing her to turn.

“I will take her now, wolf.” Kouga’s hands went to kagome’s face and he brushed his lips across her reddened forehead. She hugged his waist. Once. Tightly. Then she turned to Sesshomaru’s side and let the hand on her back guide her to the stables and out of sight.


	10. Pressure

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> AN: This story absolutely tortured me last night. I think I was awake, lying there in bed, until three in the morning. Just writing out scenes and progressions in my head, and not being able to fall asleep. It was infuriating, honestly, it was.
> 
> Then, of course, the first thing I did when I woke up this morning was check on the stats for this story. I live for those climbing numbers, I swear.
> 
> Well, not really- they do bring me immense joy though.
> 
> In the five minutes between looking at the number of hits it had gotten, brushing my teeth, and checking the numbers again- it occurred to me that people were reading this while I was scrubbing the nasty out of my mouth.
> 
> It was an exceptional thought for me. An exceptional thought, and an exceptional feeling.
> 
> So I just want to thank anyone who is reading. You all have a special place in my heart. It seems like a small thing. I don’t know any of you. I don’t need to… but the idea that my words might be bringing a little bit of positivity to your day; it’s indescribable.
> 
> Thank you all.
> 
> ~Ele
> 
> ALSO! I said in chapter one that I wouldn’t write any more long author’s notes. I guess I lied about that. I guess it just shows that never is an unattainable ideal.
> 
> … … …  
> Posted 1.14.2020  
> Unedited

Paradigm Shift

Chapter Ten: Pressure

… … …

It was blessedly quiet in the stables. Sesshomaru stopped at the entrance and gestured her forward, but she didn’t move from his side. Her shoulders shook as she tried to repress her sobs. She didn’t do a very good job.

“There is no-one to hear you here, Kagome.” He said to her softly. She hung her head and tears fell from her even as she shook with the stubborn refusal to let any more cries or sobs come from her.

“You’re here.” She replied brokenly. She stood in front of him without looking away from the sodden floor at her feet and reached out one hand to grasp the index and middle fingers of his hand in her fist.

“I am.”

“Why are you here, Sesshomaru?”

He shook his hand slightly, trying to dislodge her from his fingers as he stepped around her and into the stables. He sighed, resigned to being accosted. As he walked, Kagome readjusted her grip so that she could walk with him into the darkness, sliding her hand around to hold his hand properly. He didn’t wrap his hand around hers in return or acknowledge the gesture, but he didn’t try to remove her again, either. They stopped in front of a beautiful black stallion.

“We are here.” He shook his hand again. She gripped tighter, and he sighed. He curled his thumb around her knuckles and lifted their hands to rest on the stallion’s silky neck. He rubbed the back of her hand across its coat. “Because sometimes you need to talk to someone who will not judge you. Who cannot judge you.”

She started as the horse shook his head and snorted at her, but released Sesshomaru and replaced her palm on its neck as it calmed. Her other hand came up to scratch its nose.

“I imagine that your taijiya takes comfort from her feline in the same matter.”

“Kirara is smarter than a horse though. She can understand what Sango talks to her about.”

“Indeed. Ah-Un is very similar in that regard. It stands that they do not have the same capacity to relate to someone in need.”

“I guess.” She stood there for what seemed like seconds but could have been hours, before looking back at his pale figure.

“You didn’t answer my question.” He pointed to the stallion.

“That’s not what I meant.”

Kagome looped her arms around the soft neck of the horse and rubbed her cheek against his.

“Why are _you **here**_?” She asked again. “Why do you care now, all of a sudden? Why did you decide to come with us, like that?”

“You.”

“Me?” She spun to face him, shocked. “What..?” Her conversation from the afternoon before invaded thoughts.

**_“”What’s that about anyway? He’s being so weird” _ **

**_“”You don’t know why?””_ **

**_“It’s more accurate to call him protective.””_ **

**_“”… … implications to his station… …””_ **

“This is about me and Kouga telling you about the panther youkai?”

“Yes and no. My presence with you, here, is very similar to my presence in Rin’s life.”

Her face scrunched up in confusion.

“I don’t get it.”

Kagome felt the stress and excitement of the past weeks weighing in her, and she just wanted to go to sleep for days; alone, in her room. She needed a break from all of this intensity. She just wanted it to _stop_. Everything was so much simpler before she had made that fateful decision to be responsible.

Sesshomaru placed his hand on her back again, steering her to the end of the row and into the last stall. He handed her yellow, worn out, backpack and lifted Ah-Un’s saddle and its burdens onto his shoulder.

Kagome followed him back they way they had come, perplexed.

“Rin came to me while I was injured. When Inuyasha took my arm. I was, as you might imagine, rather perturbed at that time. The wound was fresh and painful. Still, the girl only showed me compassion and kindness; though I did my best to deter her efforts.”

Kagome scrubbed at the itchy, tight skin on her cheeks where her tears had dried, listening intently. She had only known the little girl for a short time, but the story definitely sounded like something she’d expect from her.

“Rin tried to help me in the only ways that she knew how. She was unaffected by the warning of the violence that I presented to her, only seeking to give me comfort and aid.”

Kagome nodded to herself as she listened. They rounded the corner and the main house was in sight. She could see the subject of his story dangling from one of Ah-Un’s steady necks. Shippou was sitting on the other head, laughing at her.

“Kagome.”

She made a noise of acknowledgment, still watching the playing trio and the two servant girls nearby.

“Stop and look at me, Kagome.”

“Eh?” She did as he asked, a little dazedly from her emotional exhaustion. He was a few paces behind her as he forged ahead.

“Rin tried to save my life in the only way that she was able.” Kagome nodded. “You tried to save my lands and everyone who lives in them, and myself, with your warning.”

She gaped at him.

“I…

“While neither of you stopped to consider the implications of your actions, I’m sure,”

**_“”You don’t understand the implications to his station…””_ **

“I do not take those implications lightly. That you would put yourself in the position where you now stand; it demands my respect, my consideration, and my reciprocation. Your message could either prevent or ease dissensions in my territory. It is not an action that I can simply let pass, Kagome.”

Kagome was at a loss for words. As the full impact of her split-second decision seeped into her mind, she was stunned. None of it had occurred to her at the time, or after. She had just latched onto a feeling of _wrongness_ and done her best to set it right.

“Oh.”

“Oh, indeed.”

Kagome dropped her backpack and ran to him, trying to wrap her arms around him in a hug.

Unfortunately, her cheek bounced off of his chest plate, the spikes narrowly missing her.

“Ow.” She still did her best to hug him. “Thank you.” She said.

“Why do you persist to thank me without reason?”

“There’s a reason.”

“I am simply upholding my honor, Kagome.”

She shook her head and looked up into his face intently, and put her little hands around the spikes that had nearly impaled her.

“No! I mean, yes, but… thank you. For making me feel like something about _me_ … is important to someone.”

“Inuyasha….” He sighed. “Is an idiot, Kagome.”

Sesshomaru decided to humor her, and bent over to place his arm behind her knees, lifting her up. She readily took the opportunity and wrapped her arms around his neck.

“You are undeniably infuriating. Rin has never sought this level of physical attention.” Despite his words, his face fell to her neck, and his nose ran back and forth over her skin.

“Yeah, well, you’re acting like a dog so I’m allowed to act clingy.”

“I _am_ a dog, miko.”

“And _I’m_ needy. Deal with it, it’s _your_ problem now.”

He set her down abruptly and raised an eyebrow at her. She giggled.

“So. This all means that you’re going to be protecting me from now on, like Rin?”

“Hm.”

Kagome jogged back to her fallen bag, scooped it up, and ran toward the steps of the main house. She scooped Rin up and twirled her cackling little body in a circle.

… … …

As the sun began to wake and stretch its arms to push aside the darkness, the group tiredly readied themselves to set out. Lord Kuranosuke was warned about the shade, and how it would reappear if given time to regain its strength. He was told about how he needed to find what the bear youkai was using to ground itself and keep itself from true death. He was thanked for his hospitality, and his insistence on payment; though they had not been the one who had rid the compound of the malevolent spirit in the end.

Aki and Chiyo were thanked for all that they had done to make them comfortable.

Sango was pulled away for another private conversation with Lord Kuranosuke.

Miroku was sitting on the steps, leaning against his shakujo and falling asleep.

Kagome, Rin, Shippou, and Kirara were huddled together in the circle of Ah-Un’s legs, covered with a blanket and trying to sleep.

Inuyasha was hiding from the resident healer.

Kouga and Sesshomaru, however, were standing near the gates, talking.

“I’d like to know how you did that.” Kouga said, fixated on Kagome’s relaxed face.

“I did nothing other than tell her the truth.”

“Well, whatever you said to her, it snapped her out of the mood she was in pretty damn fast.”

As they observed, Kagome gave a pleased sigh and pulled Shippou tighter against her chest, turning onto her side. The motion jarred rin, and her she slipped down, ending up almost completely laying on top of Kagome. Kirara slipped off her perch on Rin’s head, jumped onto her back and pawed at Rin’s shoulders before settling at the pinnacle of their little pile.

“I must return to the west, shortly.” Sesshomaru gave his full attention to the wolf as he spoke. “You need to as well.”

Kouga grimaced at the reminder.

“I do need to. The wolf tribes were in an uproar before I left. The western packs are hesitant to accept us into their ranks as easily as I had hoped.”

“Yet you left them?”

“They’ll fight it out and get over it without me there. It’s how we are.” Kouga waved a dismissive hand. “The western prince and I have settled matters and we expect everyone to calm down soon, anyway.”

“That is… reassuring.” The tone in Sesshomaru’s voice suggested that he was anything but reassured.

“You taking Kagome with you?”

“I expect you to inform prince Kazuo that he is to accompany you to the Western Hall.”

“Yeah. I’ll tell him that we’re all gathering.”

“What do you know of the Panther Tribe? As I was aware, they resided near your previous settlement.”

“Not much, really. They kept to themselves. There aren’t many more of them than what we saw a few weeks ago. Maybe a dozen of them in all? They didn’t pick many fights with other clans in the east, but they’re strong. My pack had a run-in with one of them, once. The stinkin’ cat ran off after pissing us off, and then some of them tried to attack us that night.”

“Opportunistic of them.”

“Yeah.”

… … …

They had left Kuranosuke’s compound about an hour ago. It was raining again. After all of the reds and pinks in the sky at sunrise, nothing but grey could be seen above their heads now. When Kagome’s foot sank, ankle deep, into a puddle that turned out to be much deeper than she had estimated and her left shoe filled with water, she reached her limit.

Everything had been non-stop chaos for weeks, she was trying to adjust to too many new shifts in the _normal_ that was her life in this ear, and the people in it. Her body was _tired and sore_ and her emotions had been toppling her head over heels since it all started. Sesshomaru was being _possessive_. Inuyasha was being _distant_. Sango was _preoccupied_ and couldn’t listen to more than her _first_ sentence when she tried to talk to her. Miroku was _Miroku_. She needed a _break._ She wanted _quiet_. She needed a _real bath_ and time to _think_ and _process_ and it was almost her _birthday_ and _graduation_ was soon and she has _worked hard_ to graduate and _it was hell_ and there had been _**appeals** and she **felt** like **hell**._.. and… and… she wanted to _go home._

“Inuyasha!” She yelled, hands balled at her sides.

“What!”

“Take me home!”

“WHAT!?! No way! We haven’t found any shards since you’ve been here!”

“I’ve been here over a month! I want to see my family and I have _things_ to do!”

Sango sighed at the familiar argument, and let Kirara down so that she could phase into her larger form. She didn’t blame Kagome for wanting to go home, she wouldn’t mind a break either. They hadn’t searched non-stop like this in a long time, and she could use some time to make repairs to her suit and armor.

“We could all use some time to get back up to par, Inuyasha. Kaede’s village is only a few days away, let’s just take Kagome home and take care of some things while she’s gone.”

Inuyasha turned to Sango with a glare.

“If she didn’t _leave_ all the time, we’d have all of the pieces by now! Nothing that she has back _there_ could be as important as getting the shards before Naraku!”

The chunk of the Shikon twisted around in Kagome’s fingers as her anger started to fade, and the hurt from Inuyasha’s words washed over her. It felt like he was getting more and more single-minded, focusing in on the shards. Their conversations were few and far between, lately and when they did talk, he was distant or terse with her.

She could understand it a little, what with Kouga and Sesshomaru getting on his nerves, the weather forcing them to stop constantly, _and Kikyo._

She knew that she would never measure up to Kikyo in his eyes. He could barely separate them in his mind. Kagome would always be the one that came _after_. After Kikyo loved Inuyasha and Inuyasha loved her. After Kikyo died. After the jewel. Always one step behind the important things.

“I should pay a visit to Mushin’s Temple. Check-in on the old drunk.”

“I have business in the Western Hall that needs to be attended to.”

Kagome wondered whether she should just have asked Sesshomaru to take her home this time. _He_ seemed to be taking it seriously when he had said that he would protect her. _‘That used to be Inuyasha’s job. I guess that comes after Kikyo, too.’_

She was just too _done_ with dealing with everything right then to work up any indignation when Kouga swept her up into his arms bridal style. The most she could manage was a sigh.

“I can take you home before I go check on my tribe, Kagome. We could be there in time. Less than a day.”

“Don’t even touch her, bastard!” Inuyasha shouted at him. He was ignored.

“That would be nice, Kouga. Thanks.”

“You will stay with your family for at least two weeks while I am in the west.” Sesshomaru’s matter-of-fact speech patterns didn’t usually bother her anymore, but she’d had just about enough of never having a say in anything. She struggled up in Kouga’s arms enough to glare at him over one shoulder.

“I’ll stay however long I stay, Sesshomaru!”

“No less than two weeks.”

“UGH!” She slapped at her kidnapper until he put her down, and marched herself over to him. She huffed and sputtered and the only thing she managed to get out coherently was a strangled, “BULLY!” Maybe he would have taken her more seriously if he wasn’t so tall and intimidating… or if she wasn’t so small and useless. He bent over her and their noses nearly touched.

“Two weeks.”

“You! AHHHHH! Kouga! Take me home!”

… … …

As soon as her foot crossed the threshold, Kagome was in heaven. Dropping her bag felt like she was just tossing all of the stress from the past few weeks of insanity on the floor. She was tempted to stomp on it. She was swept into a tight embrace by her mother and it was exactly what she needed. Warm and familiar. She sighed into the hug, finally feeling relaxed.

“Hi mama.”

“Welcome home, sweetie.”

“Thanks. It’s good to be back.”

Kagome was forced into a chair at the table in the kitchen, and watched contentedly as her mom bustled about the place. When a bowl a fresh, sliced fruit and whipped cream was set down, her mother dropped into the chair next to her.

“I was starting to worry about you, Kagome! You’ve been gone a long time, this time.”

“I’m okay mama. I think the days just started blurring together and I lost track.”

The older woman nodded sagely and plucked a strawberry from the bowl, mirroring her daughter.

“So what in the world have you been up to for the last five weeks?”

The strawberry stopped on its sinful journey.

“Eh?”

“Oh! That reminds me!” An envelope was pulled from the nearby counter and pushed across the table into Kagome’s waiting hands.

“What’s this?”

“Your diploma came in the mail a few days ago! You made it! All that Higurashi stubbornness.”

“I missed graduation?”

“Oh! No, sweetie. They just mail the official diplomas out early. The letter said so.”

Kagome bit her strawberry in half and chewed as she laid her upper half across the surface of the table. Can’t she escape the heart attacks here, either?

“Wait.. did you say five weeks?”

“Mhm. You haven’t stayed in the feudal era for so long since you were fifteen. Grandpa, Souta and I were getting really worried.”

“Sorry. I didn’t realize it had been that long. I thought I’d been gone for almost four. The days really did blur together with everything that’s happened.”

“Why don’t you tell me about it?”

“After a shower?”

… … …

The loose thread in her pajama pants was utterly fascinating. That’s why she wouldn’t look at here mother sitting there next to her on her big, soft, warm, welcome, clean bed. Maybe she would just fluff this pillow and have mercy on the thread. She’d missed the pillow and it should be feeling neglected.

“You really have had quite the adventure, dear. This Kouga boy is the one that’s been asking you to marry him for so long?”

“Yeah.”

“What does you Inuyasha have to say about all of this?”

“Not much. He doesn’t have much of anything to say at all lately.”

“Ah. His brother is with you now too? I thought you said that they don’t get along.”

Kagome laughed, despite the frustration of trying to tell her mother about what had been happening in the past, without telling her what had been happening in the past. She knew her mom would worry no matter what, but at least she didn’t have to know about the near death experiences and overly affectionate encounters that her daughter went through when she was away.

“They still don’t get along.”

Kagome curled her fingers around the corners of her pillow, not knowing what to say. Or not knowing what she could say without making her mother call someone to drive a bulldozer over the well.

“Well, your birthday is almost here. Would you like to spend it with your friends?”

“But mama! I just got back!”

“Oh, dear. I was… talking about your friends from school, here.”

Kagome flushed and hid her face in her pillow. Nowhere was safe, it seemed. She was doomed to watch everything around her blow up into some alternate reality, and she was helpless to stop it.

Could she even really call Ayumi, Eri and Yuke her friends anymore? How can you be friends with someone who knows nothing about you or your life? Not that she knew anything about theirs…

… … …

Her birthday flew by in no time. It wasn’t particularly happy. Sure, she had a good time being with her family and she smiled and said thank you at all the right times…but …what did it really matter that she was eighteen now? She didn’t get a licence to dive when the time had come around, she wasn’t going to put in any applications for a job, and now she was surrounded by presents from the people that she loved most… all practical for hiking through the wilderness five hundred years ago.

This is where her life had led her?

She wondered whether she would have been happier if she had never pulled that arrow from Inuyasha. What kind of person would she be now? Would she have kept up good grades, stayed at the top of her class, maybe be looking into prestigious universities, now?

Would the stability be worth the boring?

What if she just decided to stay here?

She knew she wouldn’t.

… … …

Graduation seemed empty to her. Mostly, she was just glad that it was over and she wouldn’t have to make up excuses to awkward questions anymore.

… … …

The brand new lavender backpack that Souta had given her was filled up with everything that she thought she needed, and she sat on the lip of the well in a pair of jeans. The heavy boots that Grandpa had given her felt too heavy. Everything felt too heavy.

She shifted and let herself fall into the stream of light.


	11. Breaking Point

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> AN: I’m slightly perturbed by the fact that after my eye appointment yesterday, I was informed that at 28yrs old, I’m being dragged screaming and kicking into “multi-focal” lens glasses. This is apparently a really nice way of saying “girl, tri-focals are just not good enough” THAT part is only perturbing….  
> THEN my eye doc proceeds to offend my very soul by telling me that I should cut down on the amount of time that I spend reading (this covers traditional writing nowadays, I’m informed) OR digital reading ( ALSO includes writing!)  
> No, doc. Just no. gimme the grandma glasses and go away.  
> I did get a bit of revenge at the counter though. The clerk and I talked for half an hour and swapped book titles while he watched in amusement.  
> Don’t mess with my passion, man.  
> *cough* anyways.   
> … … …  
> Paradigm Shift has officially become the longest story that I have ever shared with anyone. I feel really good about that. Best part of it is that I finally figured out how it’s going to end. I’ve never actually found an end point for anything I’ve written. I’m hyped about it. The whole thing is planned out and all I have to do is make the pretty words in the middle.

Paradigm Shift

Chapter Eleven: Breaking Point

… … …

Shippou was bored. His mama wasn’t back from the world in the well yet. Inuyasha was picking on him, and Kaede’s hut smelled like dead plants. Which it was full of. Which was starting to really bother him. So he was sitting in the meadow that surrounded the well. _‘I bet Rin would like this one.’_ The thought cheered him up a little bit, and he hoped that Rin would come back to see him soon. It was fun with her around.

Since his father had died, it had been all blood and fighting and people crying. There were lots of other children in some of the villages who didn’t have parents anymore, either. But he had Kagome. So it was okay.

He touched the petal of the little flower that he wanted to show Rin, hoping with all of his heart that she would be here before it curled up that afternoon.

It was just a morning asagao. They were the first ones of the summer, and once the morning dew had dried up on them all, they would close up for the day. This one was special though.

On the winding vine of purple-speckled white flowers… there was this one. It wasn’t the biggest or the brightest, but it was different.

It didn’t have any little purple speckles on it, it was just plain and white and medium-sized… but inside… there was a miniature asagao. A little one that was bright red and had white stripes shooting out from its center. It was special.

“Ah. Shippou.”

Miroku had come through the tree line, into the little meadow, and was smiling at Shippou as he made his way _very slowly_ toward the kitsune.

“Hi, Miroku. You look tired.”

“That I am, my little friend.” He replied as he readied himself to sit by Shippou.

“Hey! Be careful!” Shippou hunched over the special little flower and bowed his head over it.

Miroku peered over.

“What do you have there?”

Shippou turned his head and glared at the monk.

“I won’t bother it, Shippou.”

He slowly moved away from his precious little plant. He kept one little arm between it and Miroku.

“Don’t touch it! I don’t want it to get ruined.”

“Ooooh.” Miroku sighed. “That’s very beautiful. I’ve never seen one like it before.”

“Me either.”

“Are you protecting it for Kagome?”

Shippou thought about the question for a few seconds. _‘I can keep it for Rin **and** mama.” _He nodded.

“Is she here?” He straightened up and turned his head in the direction of Kaede’s village, as if his violet eyes could somehow find her past the trees and all the way down the path, into the village.

“Not yet.”

“Ah. I had wondered.”

“It’s been so long.”

“Not that long, Shippou. Two weeks, today.”

“I know. It’s still a long time, though.”

Miroku didn’t say anything. He understood what it felt like for the little kit. He missed his parents, too, at times. All of these years later and that feeling never quite went away. He wondered if it ever would.

“She’ll be here soon. Don’t worry.”

“I know.”

“Are any of the others back yet?”

Shippou scowled at his little flower-in-a-flower.

“Inuyasha hasn’t left at all. He’s either been picking on me or fighting with Kouga or bothering Kaede.”

“Kouga is here already?”

Miroku hadn’t expected Kouga to be any earlier to arrive than Sesshomaru. He had heard rumors of tensions in the western lands on his way to and from Mushin’s temple. They had made him worry that neither of the leaders would be joining their caravan any time soon.

“Sort of. He comes and goes every few days.”

“Ah, the luxury of being able to travel so quickly.”

As the morning hours crawled by, Miroku napped and Shippou blasted him with foxfire every time he threatened to roll over too close to the flower. They were eventually joined by Sango; who had a fancy new slayer suit and armor. Shippou told her that he liked the new colors. Miroku snored at her. Kirara laid on his face.

Kaede brought them all a picnic of roasted fish that some of the village men had delivered to her. She stayed with them for a while but she eventually excused herself to attend to her duties as the only resident Miko. There were blessings to give, dog hanyou and wolf youkai to separate, and a new baby was threatening to greet them all soon.

When the sun has risen high above their heads, Sango headed into the forest with Kirara to try and replace Kaede’s supply of fish with some game meat. They had eaten what fish the old woman had been given, after all, and Kaede’s supply of salted, dried meats was always too low.

Miroku was content to meditate under the shade of a low-hanging tree branch that stuck out of the tree line near the well.

Shippou watched his flower.

… … …

“Will we be there soon, Lord Sesshomaru?”

“Rin.”

“Sorry, Lord Sesshomaru.”

She looked thoughtfully into the pile of wineberries that were cradled tenderly in the fabric of her yukata.

“Would you like some berries, Lord Sesshomaru?”

“Stop bothering Lord Sesshomaru, girl!”

Sesshomaru closed his eyes and tried to block out the sounds of their bickering. Between Rin asking _constantly_ how close they were to Kagome’s home, and Jaken’s shrill scoldings; he was nursing a headache. He would be glad once they arrived and he could separate them. Though he reconsidered his chances of gaining relief when Rin squealed in happiness, crawling up Ah-Un’s heads to tug at his pelt as the village of Edo appeared in the distance.

Sesshomaru’s mood only darkened further as they approached. The aerial view provided him with the positions of everyone. Everyone except his willful, new ward. His eyes narrowed. He couldn’t find and fresh traces of her scent either.

As they came nearer and the scattered make-up of the unusual contingent began to head toward the outskirts of Edo, in his direction, he took Ah-Un down. They landed in a meadow where the fading traces of her scent were strongest. He peered curiously into an empty, dry well as he passed it, and left Rin to Shippou’s attentions.

To say that Miroku was… surprised… might just fall short of the situation. He was pulled from his peaceful meditations by a pressure originating from the center of his throat.

When he opened his eyes, he became very _very_ still. The point of an extremely powerful, extremely _sharp_ sword, with an **_extremely pissed off_** Sesshomaru on its other end was making him **_very uncomfortable_**.

“Ah… hah..ha..” He forced a very strained smile onto his face. “Good afternoon, Lord Sesshomaru. Is there something that you need from me? I would be delighted to assist you.”

The point pressed a little closer. He tried to lean a little bit further away.

“Where. Is. She?” The words were snarled at him and punctuated with tiny circular twists of the blade.

“Ah. I assume that you are inquiring after Kagome?” He tried to inch away from that very _very_ sharp point again. “I’m afraid that she has not returned from her home just yet.” When Sesshomaru’s eyes narrowed and his grip on the hilt tightened, Miroku threw his hands into the air in surrender and he hastily added. “We expect her back any time now.”

“When did she leave and where did she go?”

Miroku suddenly remembered that Kouga and Sesshomaru hadn’t been informed of Kagome’s time-traveling abilities. His eyes widened and his face paled.

“Well, you see..” He pointed at the well. Sesshomaru turned to look at it, and then growled deep in his chest.

“Explain.”

“Well, Kagome’s home is here, Lord Sesshomaru. On the other side of that dry well.”

“You expect me to believe that the girl lives at the bottom of a well?”

The smallest bead of red blossomed at Miroku’s neck.

“Ah..hah…”

“Am I to dig?”

Now, normally Miroku was all for sarcasm, but right about now he felt that it was about to be the death of him.

When the red-clad figure came through the trees, Miroku wondered whether he should have insulted Inuyasha quite so much over the years.

“Oi! What do you think you’re doing?”

Miroku sighed with relief, only mentally of course; that sword was still very near and very sharp. He supposed that he should be thankful for the intervention. He would have preferred to be defended a little more enthusiastically, perhaps with Tetsusaiga drawn, but he would take what he was offered.

He really did sigh in relief when Tokijin was removed from his person and directed at Inuyasha.

“Where. Is. Kagome?”

“She’s not here, stupid.”

The space began to close between the two.

Sango and Kouga came into the meadow, talking amiably with one another. Their smiles faded instantly as they took in the agitated dog youkai.

“Inuyasha! What did you do!?”

“I didn’t do nothin’! He wants Kagome!”

“Oh. She’s not here yet, Lord Sesshomaru.”

The pounding in his head doubled and his remarkable restraint began to fade as he was presented, again, with something that he already knew.

“You didn’t tell him?” Sango hissed through her teeth at the sheepish Kouga.

“Well… he was busy.” He coughed into his fist and his eyebrow twitched. “And it’s not got anything to do with the western lands, anyway.”

“Do you have a death wish?”

Kouga wasn’t nearly as concerned with Sango’s incredulous tone as he was with the fact that Sesshomaru was now growling. Loudly. And walking toward him. Slowly. And his eyes were beginning to take on a red tint.

And then the well began to glow with a burst of rainbow light. Then there was a groan, followed by some quiet muttering. And some scrambling noises.

Sesshomaru stared at the well. Tokijin dropped a few inches. Kagome’s hand came up over the lip. Sesshomaru blinked. Repeatedly.

Big blue eyes took in the surrounding chaos.

“Uh. Hi. I’m back?”

“Kouga didn’t tell Sesshomaru about the well.” Sango explained.

“Kouga! You promised!” He refused to meet her eyes. Or Sesshomaru’s.

Sesshomaru put Tokijin back in its place at his side and strode to meet Kagome at the well. She handed him her new purple backpack and lifted herself out, hopping neatly onto the grass.

“Look!” She stuck her leg out toward the annoyed taiyoukai. “I got better battle wear.” She grinned at him unabashedly. He looked down at her jean-covered appendage and turned away. They all watched as he tied the lavender bag to its now customary place on Ah-Un’s saddle and walked calmly into the forest.

“Well!” Miroku said loudly from behind her. “I would say that, overall, that went rather well.” He smiled winningly at them all.

Kagome lifted her fingers to his throat. They came away with a smudge of blood.

“It’s nothing to concern yourself with. Just a small prick.”

“So this is your definition of things _going well_?”

… … …

After Kagome had admired Sango’s new white suit and sky blue armor pieces, scolded Kouga, inspected Shippou and Rin’s little treasure, given Kaede a big glass jar of salt, scolded Kouga some more, argued with Inuyasha, ignored Jaken, hugged everyone, ignored Jaken some more, and scratched Kirara and Ah-Un’s ears, the sun was setting.

… … …

“Aye, child. This should hold most of ye. I’m afraid my own humble home would be far too small to hold so many.”

“I’m sorry, Kaede. I know we sort of invade you on a regular basis.”

“Think naught of it, Kagome. I only fear that it would burst at the stitching if ye all were to stay.”

Kagome peered into the freshly built hut. Kaede had asked her for salt before she had gone back home, but Kagome hadn’t realized that the fist-sized pouch the old woman had already possessed would buy everything it took to build a _house_. And people to build it, apparently. Maybe she should bring salt back more often.

They all fit inside, though Shippou insisted on staying with Kaede that night before the set out again.

**_“”So she doesn’t get lonely, Kagome! We’ll all be gone tomorrow!””_ **

So they all settled in and bedded down for the night, intent on getting an early start when the sun rose.

Kagome, though, drifted in and out of sleep. Her mind was still racing the way it had been before she left and while she was at home. Seeing her family in the future hadn’t helped. Seeing her family here hadn’t helped.

 _‘It’s no use. I just feel… useless.’_ Her thoughts spun around her, only serving to drive her into herself and her doubts. _‘What if I’m not good enough for anyone? I can’t even help in fights that much. Most of the time **someone** ends up having to come rescue me’_

She carefully sat up in the darkness and made her way to the door. If she couldn’t sleep, fine. She’d go sit under the summer stars and try not to think at all.

Except that when she made her way toward the little clearing that held Goshinboku, Inuyasha was already there. He was sitting in front of it, staring at the mark from the arrow that had held him for fifty years.

“Inuyasha?” She sat next to him. He didn’t look at her.

“Hey Kagome.”

“What are you doing here?”

“Couldn’t sleep.”

“Me too.”

Kagome picked at the inseam of her jeans.

“Kagome?”

“Yeah?”

“I’m sorry.”

Inuyasha stood up and walked to the big tree, placing his hand flat against the bark. Kagome couldn’t bring herself to ask what he was apologizing for. There were just too many things that it could be about. Too many things that she knew would make him leave her there if she said anything about them. So she just shrugged.

“Inuyasha?” Her voice was quiet, barely more than a breath, and it wavered with uncertainty.

She wanted to ask… wanted to know…

Probably would never had worked up the courage to even think about the words of her question if she had known that other sleepless people were watching from the trees.

“Will I…” She drew her bottom lip into her mouth as he turned to face her, his face blank. “I mean… will you ever-” The tears welled up in her eyes and she stood, walking to his side and cupping his face in her palms. They warmed as he covered them with his own. “Could you ever… if she…-” And then Inuyasha jerked his hands away as a lone shinidamachu wrapped around them on its way past the Goshinboku.

She was left there with her arms outstretched, hands cupping air in the shape of his face, as he backed away from her and turned.

Dread, deep and heavy, settled through her being. Her heartbeat was loud in her ears. Her hands were cold again.

As she watched him bend to jump into the treetops, _to go to her_ , her body moved instinctively. She ran to him and caught a fist full of his rough haori. Inuyasha turned back to her, something in his eyes that she couldn’t read. Her hand moved to lay on his chest, atop the subjugation beads that he had worn for so long.

When Sesshomaru settled on a branch above her, she didn’t hear. When Miroku stepped around from behind the far side of Goshinboku, he wasn’t seen.

“Please stay.” Kagome whispered against his chest. Her hand curled on his chest, the beads caught up with the fabric and digging painfully against her palm.

“Kagome… ”

“Could you ever pick me, Inuyasha?” She finally asked her question and Inuyasha’s hand came up to cover hers.

The spark of hope that she had held for so long in her heart flared at his touch.

Then he started to move her hand away from him. Her grip slackened for a moment, his haori slipping away, then it tightened even harder than before, clutching only the necklace.

“No! Please! Inuyasha! Please just **_stay_**!” Her head shook back and forth on his chest before he lifted that away from him too. When she looked up into his face, she knew that her words were in vain.

“Kagome… I can’t.”

_‘Can’t stay… can’t pick me.’_

He pushed her shoulders away from him and she stumbled. As she fell, he reached out to her with one hand but only air was caught as his fingers closed.

The necklace snapped.

Beads scattered around them.

Her eyes closed and he ran.

Kagome reached her hand up to wipe away the tears that she couldn’t stem, but when she opened her hand and three pieces of her first connection to Inuyasha fell from her palm and left behind deep imprints, she could only stare.

Leaves rustled as Sesshomaru came to her side, but she curled away from him, turning onto her hands and knees. Her back straightened and she just sat there, eyes closed, kneeling, with her fists pressing hard into her thighs.

Sesshomaru looked over her into Miroku’s eyes. Should they leave her? Should they carry her back into the village? Should they comfort her here? Did she want her friends surrounding her? Did she want them to see her like this?

A loud sob tore from her throat. The two men startled at the sound. It sounded **_wrong_**. Like an echo, bouncing around a room full of brass chimes.

Then she opened her eyes and Sesshomaru took a step back. Miroku stepped forward.

He reached a hand out toward her, eyes wide.

“No.” He breathed.

Sesshomaru's head snapped to him.

“No!” He took another step forward before locking hard eyes to Sesshomaru.

“Go! You have to go!” The panic in those violet eyes urged him to move, and for once the Lord of the West was afraid; because the vivid blue was gone from Kagome’s eyes as she stared at the Goshinboku. A pink light flared around her, and through the haze, her eyes were a glimmering amethyst; tinged with her aura and shining with an ethereal light.

“Sesshomaru! You have to leave! Get Shippou and get as far away from here as you can!”

A pulse of iridescent pink light pushed outward from Kagome’s skin and Sesshomaru hissed in pain. His worried gold eyes met Miroku’s and when her heart beat again, another, bigger, brighter pulse left her. Sesshomaru jumped back to the other side of the small clearing. His skin stung.

“Shippou! And go!”

And he was gone in a burst of pale yellow light that condensed itself down into a sphere.

Kagome finally tore her eyes from the tree and looked after him. Those strange eyes flipped back and to Miroku and he dropped his Shakujo to the forest floor. He took a step toward her, and one of her hands flew out in front of her, palm up, halting him even as his own hand reached out in a reflection of her. The fingers of her other hand clawed into the cold soil.

The pulses were coming faster, stronger now; keeping pace with her increasing heart rate.

Another sob was ripped from her core and her voice was lost to that eerie chime.

He didn’t care. He ran to her and fell to his knees before her. The shimmering pink flames that encased her didn’t hurt him- couldn’t hurt him. He had his own holy energies to protect him. Even as they licked at his skin and grew, he didn’t move. He lifted one hand and very cautiously pressed his palm to hers.

She screamed.

It was loud and unearthly. He thought that if all of the metallic chimes in the world burst into a million shards of glass, then this is what it would sound like.

And as he threaded his fingers into hers and leaned down to look into her terrifying eyes, he heard an echoing crack sound through the night air.

Her back arched and her head flew backward all at once and her heart, and the half of the Shikon Jewel on its chain around her neck...

Shattered.

Her heart stopped, missed a beat as it fell apart, and shards of the jewel were propelled into the air around them. They left behind shallow cuts on his arms and face as they flew outward, carried on a massive wave of spiritual power.

As her eyes closed and she fell into Miroku’s arms, he could feel the energy settle around them. It shimmered on the dirt and leaves like snow, before sinking down into the earth and left behind an overwhelming sensation of purity.


	12. Confession

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Posted 1.16.2020  
> Unedited

Paradigm Shift

Chapter Twelve: Confession

… … …

There’s a place in the time between _awake_ and _asleep_ where you can be part of the everything and nothing of the universe. A moment that goes on forever in an instant and cradles you tenderly in its incorporeal arms. You feel nothing except the _wholeness_ that we fight for and crave every day. It is simple and complex and _perfect_ and everything is _right._

Then that all gets stripped away so fast and so cruelly. There’s that shock of emptiness that floods your existence without it, and your life’s contents spill into you and you’re awake.

For most people, the _after_ that makes up consciousness is something neutral. They have to stretch their bodies to get used to them again. They open their mouths and _inhale_ to try to draw that _something_ back into them. It won’t come, though, and so they sit up and sigh and get ready to go about life; always searching for it.

Some try to recapture it by rolling over and screwing their eyes closed, hoping and _trying_ and _wanting_ for one more embrace of it.

Others turn over and reach out, finding the warmth of another body and they smile. They know that the perfect swirl of _the vast_ is but a moment away. They hold it and they treasure it, and as lips meet they feel reality collide with dreams and even hope can’t compare because they’ve found the moment that surpasses all; they’ve found it and it will never be more than a smile away.

Still, others… others that have found a shadow of what they think might be… could be… they chase it and when it slips away from them and the truth makes them look into that void, they are torn asunder by the realization that it was almost within their grasp. That they had fooled themselves into this all consuming sea of torment by brushing their fingers against what might have been completion. The utter defeat of being so close that they could taste the reason for life only for it to be false… the pain of it makes them curl into themselves upon the realization that the gaping emptiness is still there, was never filled, had never really been close to the truth of it all. Then they cry and it hurts so much that _everything hurts._

Kagome gasped as she was thrown into reality. She folded into herself and her fingers clawed desperately at the skin above her heart. She wanted it _out_ because, on some level of existence, she knew that _happiness_ originated and lived inside of it. As her blunt nails scraped and dug and scrambled for purchase and failed to touch or overcome the _total destruction_ … she cried.

Silently, because it was something in her _soul_. Desperately, because she was hoping that the waters of her life essence might wash it all away.

When she felt the hesitant touch on her cheek, brushing her hair away from her face, she clutched it with everything she had. _‘Don’t let me fall, don’t let it take me, I’m afraid and I’m not ready to give up, but it hurts so much. I need this. Ground me. Distract me. Don’t go. I need you, now. **Save me**.’ _Her soul screamed out.

And she was straddling his lap and clinging to him, wrapping herself around this kindred, answering emptiness that was searching just like she was. Telling her that she wasn’t alone.

The hand slid through her charged tresses. Each strand wavered with the static of her flaring aura and the reaching of her miko abilities. Over and over, and ever so softly, the soothing gesture calmed her and the flood of tears slowed, then stopped. The whispers in her ears became comprehendible and she could feel the steady, calming presence of the other person’s aura wrapping around her own. It quieted the storm and she was aware of other hands on her back, on her forearms. Small arms around her neck, around her neck, and she felt the spinning of her world grind to a halt.

Everything was upside down and inside out and _different_ and she opened bright blue eyes that strove to understand this new view of everyone and everything that she had thought was _constant and unchanging_.

She wavered on the precipice of _everything’s okay_ and _nothing will ever be the same_. She **_shifted_** as her existence **_shifted_** and she knew and she realized that the two were harmonious, and this was _life_ because you have to break apart and see the world from a different perspective when you can’t find what you’re needing from the same, unchanging view that you’ve scoured before.

… … …

“Shhhh. It’s okay. We’re all right here now. I know it’s hard, Kagome, but you have to try to stay calm. We’re here now. We’re here. Shhh.”

It was such a paradigm shifting experience for him, to be in this position and not feel even remotely tempted to _indulge_. This armful of softness and sweetness that was clutching him like a lifeline, and he didn’t even think about _trying_. He clutched her closer and laid his dark head on her shoulder because it had thrown him off-kilter as well.

Never once in his life had Miroku hesitated. This was so different, though. He’d never been here, never had this much sheer _vulnerability_ directed at him. He hadn’t even known that he was capable of _not even wanting_ that high, that rush of pleasure.

So he held her, and he whispered to her, and he calmed her.

As Sesshomaru carded his fingers through her hair. As Rin and Shippou clung to her neck and waist. As Kouga rubbed her back, up and down and in circles. As Kaede laid a wrinkled hand on her forearm. As Sango rested a cheek on her knee and a hand on her thigh.

As his own arms went numb from holding her close, wrapped under and around the joints that connected her arms to her body. He held her and consumed her raging holy energies with his own, calming those too.

She turned her face on his shoulder and looked into his violet eyes, searching. _‘You **are** wanted, and you **are** loved and you **are not** alone’ _They said to her. And as she freed herself from him, she met the same look in the eyes of all of her friends.

“I’m sorry.” She whispered, but she didn’t start crying again. She knew that it would be okay again. As long as they were by her, _with_ her. And she was grateful when soft laughs and deep chuckles sounded all around her. It soothed the ache and she smiled.

“You _must_ cease these apologies for things that are beyond your control, Kagome”

She nodded at Sesshomaru, who had bent down to bring his face into her line of sight. She accepted his hand and let him pull her to her feet. This time, his word settled over her and she vowed that she would _try_ to do as she asked. This _isn’t_ her fault, and she knew that she had no need to be sorry for it.

Then she took a deep breath and expelled it, feeling like it steadied her.

Her forehead crinkled as she took in their surroundings. The light was dim, a small fire was licking at some dry wood, the leaves rustled overhead. Wait...

“Why are we outside? And where are we?” She asked.

“Well…” Sango came to stand beside her and wriggled her hand into her best friend’s. “We couldn’t stay in the village. Or near it really.” She was told.

Kagome’s confusion grew.

“Why?”

“You sort of… purified it. We’re actually a good day and a half’s walk away from the outskirts.”

Kagome’s eyes widened and she looked around at the others.

“Purified…?”

“The youkai among us cannot enter the area.” Sesshomaru told her. “The whole of the area is impossible for us to enter without harm, now.”

She turned to him, aghast. She remembered it… in a vague sort of way. It had felt like she had _exploded_.

“I did that?”

They all nodded at her.

“It seems as though you have come into the full extent of your holy powers. You’ll need to train them, and gain some control, now. I would prefer not to be meet my end at your hands if something happens to upset you”

She let out a little noise that was somewhere between astounded and unbelieving.

“Wait, wait… I was asleep for two days?”

“Almost.” Miroku told her. “Not to worry, Kagome. You were merely spent from the force of the amount of energy you used.”

She barely registered his words as her focus narrowed on the figure that stood on the outskirts of the little camp. The figure dressed in red. With dark hair. With dull human nails. Looking at her out of the corner of his eye. She wondered at the fact that she didn’t feel torn apart when she saw him. It didn’t hurt, she wasn’t angry, she didn’t feel any tears threaten her overworked eyes. She just knew that whatever she had felt for him before was… gone.

Her inquisitive look at the sky, and the full moon that was slowly pushing the sun out of center stage, and then back to his rigid stance left how speechless.

“You’re human. Why are you human?” She asked.

He jerked, startled that she would just… _talk to him at all._

“Uh…” His voice cracked. Whatever turmoil that she wasn’t feeling, he most assuredly was. “I.. uh… I was _there_. When the…” He waved a hand around in a searching sort of way. “Wave? Happened.”

“I… made you human?”

He didn’t say anything, just sort of _looked_ at her. He didn’t know _what_ to say.

“We’re not entirely sure what happened when Inuyasha was caught in the path of your purification.” Miroku told her. “We think maybe… since he experienced the full force of it… it may have purified his youkai half.”

“Is that even possible!?”

“It would seem so.”

“Will he-“ She faced Inuyasha again. “Will you get it back?”

He shrugged and she looked back to Miroku.

“We don’t know.”

… … …

Blood spattered and puddled around her as she hunched into the corner of the room. She should be dead, she knew. So much blood. She wished that she could die, she had wished it for a long time now, but she knew that she couldn’t

Kagura huddled over her sister and tried to do her best to keep Kanna safe. The last time she had dared to look over her shoulder, she had felt ice flood her veins. He was insane. Completely insane.

Rage, burning hot and rampant; careless, reckless. The entire building was turning into little more than a charred graveyard, now.

Gone. It was gone. They were gone. They. Because somehow, some way, the chunk of the Shikon jewel that he had possessed had just shattered like so much fragile glass. Then they were gone. He was furious, and he would find out why this had happened.

Then he would destroy the source of it.

… … …

When they told her what had happened to the jewel, Kagome was much calmer about it than they could have predicted. What was left for her in her own time, anyway?

So she had to start over, so what? It was pretty fitting, after all. The news almost comforted her in some way. Everything was fresh. Different, but just mostly... New. Why shouldn't she take the opportunity to do things right this time? Do things better.

She was a little bit older and a little bit more informed of what the search would be like. This time she had people to help her, people to fight with.

She really didn't see the problem with any of it.

Until she remembered Kohaku... and Mirkou's ever ominous Kazaana.

Miroku who had just held her so tightly when she had climbed him like a tree upon waking.

She wanted to be embarrassed about her reaction when she had woken up a few hours ago. She knew that she really should be embarrassed. But as she watched him sleep from her place on the other side of the dying fire, she couldn't really bring herself to be embarrassed over it. It was rather trivial in the face of the idea that he was so much further away from being rid of the curse.

He was laying on his back, looking calm and content in his sleep. She watched the light of the fire dance and lick at his face, wondering how in the world he had been able to comfort her when she was, realistically, the reason that his chances at a long and happy life had just become so much more unattainable. Where had he found the strength for it? How could he _sleep_ right now when this _had_ to be bothering him?

"Kagome. You're staring"

She jumped a little.

"How long have you been awake?"

"Long enough to wonder why you might be so fascinated with me." He smirked, eyes still closed.

"Miroku?"

"Yes, Kagome?"

"Are you okay?"

He did open his eyes then. She didn't see any surprise in his face, but those eyes. They looked so intense, so piercing, so vivid. She couldn't tell what he was thinking or how he was feeling, and so she just laid there in anticipation while he studied her.

“Miroku…?”

He stood and held out his hand to her.

“If you can’t sleep and need to talk, I’m more than willing to listen. I do, however, suggest that we do so elsewhere. We don’t want to wake the others.”

Kagome nodded and followed him into the trees. They settled a little ways away, perching on the moss-covered trunk of a fallen tree. Miroku crossed his legs under him and laid his Shakujo across his knees, waiting patiently for her to speak as she swung her legs back and forth from her perch.

“I guess I have a little insomnia after sleeping for so long.”

“It looked like a bit more than that, Kagome.”

“Well… I’ve just been thinking about everything that’s happened.”

He nodded.

“It’s just… I thought that maybe it wouldn’t be so bad, you know? Starting over. It was a pretty stupid thought, though. There’s really no way that it could be better like this. I mean, what if Naraku finds the shards first? He’s strong enough with the half that he already has.”

“We’ll find a way, Kagome. We always do. Nothing is certain. We might even defeat him tomorrow.”

Kagome froze. She hadn’t thought of that before. It had never occurred to her that they might be able to defeat Naraku before the jewel was completed. It just always made sense that they would find the shards, find Naraku, somehow take his shards, and then fight him… and hopefully win. In that order.

The thought that they could fight him first awed her. How had she never seen it that way, before? It would be so much simpler, all of it, if he was gone before the jewel was put back together.

“I’d never thought of that.”

Miroku reached over and patted her on the leg.

“So I suppose that means that your thoughts of starting over don’t seem so silly anymore.”

“I guess not.” She grinned at him. He was a little surprised when she clamoured over to him in excitement and mimicked his position, pressing her knees into his and leaning close.

“Miroku!”

“Kagome?”

He leaned back away from her a little bit.

“We have to defeat Naraku before we try to find the shards! That’s what we should have been doing all along! It makes so much sense! Then we can try to find a way to save Kohaku without Naraku controlling him! We wouldn’t be having to deal with all of his traps and attacks all of the time! You’d be safe!”

“Kagome… There will always be som-“ He paused as all of her rushed words finally processed through his mind. “Safe…? You mean the curse?”

“Of course.” When she tried to reach out to the cursed hand, he pulled it out of range. “I was so worried that I had…” She waved her arms around her. “Sped it up.”

“Ah.”

He was growing very uncomfortable, now. He tried to avoid this subject. This is how things were, and with no guarantee of success, he just preferred not to allow himself to have too much hope. He was determined, of course. That much was true, but he held no expectations of any certain outcome. This woman before him had proven to him that it only takes the space of a heartbeat to alter the circumstances of any situation. They might defeat Naraku tomorrow, or he might be consumed by the curse.

Those were only two possibilities in a long list of unknown paths that they could all find themselves on.

“Let me ask you a question, Kagome.”

She tried to tamp down her enthusiasm as his face grew serious.

“You have a unique perspective on time, so this might be something that resonates with you. Tell me, how much do the past and the future mean to you?”

Whatever she had been expecting, this wasn’t anywhere close.

“Well, they’re both important. I don’t think either one is more important than the other.”

“Just try to stay with me, here, okay? Your past shapes you into who you are now, right?”

“Yeah.”

“And your future is an idea of who you want to become, so your desired future is what guides your actions now.”

“That makes sense, I guess. I don’t understand where this is going.”

“Just humor me for a little while longer.” He grasped her hands in his. “It’s important.”

“Okay…”

“So if your past makes you who you are now, and your future is what guides you now; then what is most important?”

“And I’m not allowed to say both?”

He shook his head and smiled at her.

“It’s **_now_** Kagome. Right now. This moment.”

She made a little o with her mouth, not really knowing what to say.

“You have to stop looking for things in the past and things in the future to dwell on. It’s right now that matters. If you never live in the present, then what does your past or your future mean? They both lead to the same place. **_Now_**. I learned as a child that I need to appreciate every moment, and _live it_. You’ve experienced what happens to people who can’t let go of the past.”

 _‘Inuyasha.’_ She thought.

“And you’ve seen what happens when people only focus on a possible future that may never come to pass.”

_‘Sango.’_

She knew that Sango was always struggling with Kohaku’s existence. It didn’t matter to her that he had been dealt a fatal blow- it was the same as how Inuyasha refused to let Kikyo go. They were opposite; Inuyasha only living for a past that he could never truly have, and Sango only living for a future that she wanted to make a reality.

“You’re understanding, I see.”

He brought her hands to his mouth and kissed them softly.

“The past can’t make you happy, you can remember happy times from your past but it's not the same. The future can’t make you happy, only crave to bring that happiness into being. If they both are things that teach you or lead you to this moment- then perhaps we should all understand a little more that right now is what matters. You have to focus on what is right in front of you, every day, without letting the past or the future control _who you are._ If I never let go of the death caused by my family’s curse.. or never thought of anything but how and when I would be rid of it, what sort of life would I live right now?”

“You’d be _miserable._ ” Yet she knew that he was always smiling, always laughing… always making the most of every moment that he could. “But you’re not.”

“I’m not.”

“You’re okay.”

“I’m okay, Kagome. You’re okay, too.”

“I think I might be.”

Sunrise found them both sitting in a content type of silence with each other, just watching the world come to life.

… … …

Unfortunately for Kagome and Miroku, the rest of them wanted to find the shards to keep Naraku from attaining any more of them and gaining any more power. So Kagome found herself walking around the forest near Edo, in circles, rubbing her temples.

She was supposed to be seeing if she could sense any shards in the area since she and Inuyasha had found a few relatively nearby the first time that it had been broken.

But Sango and Miroku were getting on her nerves and she couldn’t concentrate. Which made finding any shards impossible.

“If you say one more thing about my suit, monk.”

“Sango! I am simply admiring the craftsmanship.”

Miroku was walking behind Sango, which always made her rather jumpy, and Kagome took a few steps away just in case that giant boomerang started swinging.

“For example!” Even Kagome knew that the cheerful voice was just a cover.

“Miroku.”

_‘And that would be my cue to just stop and let them get out of range. Safety should come first after all.’_

She entertained that thought of bringing back a history book. One with pictures. So that Miroku would know what was bound to happen to him one day if he didn’t learn to leave Sango alone.

_‘Booooom! Actually, you know what? Maybe Sango will just explode, instead. I couldn’t really see her having the patience to build a bomb that she would consider big enough to obliterate Miroku and his insinuations’_

“It really is wonderful work! Especially the way it clings right….here.”

_‘Wow. All he has to do is talk and get within arm’s reach and… ooo.. that’s gonna hurt.’_

Considering how well Miroku had been treating her, and how much he’d been there for her when she needed someone lately, Kagome decided to intervene before Sango actually killed him.

“You really should at least _try_ to control yourself, Miroku.” She grasped his hand and pulled him back onto his feet.

Of course, she should have known better. When he got into one of these moods he just didn’t know when to quit.

“Miroku?” She smiled at him blindingly.

“Yes, Kagome?”

“What are you doing?”

“Ah! I’m admiring your new choice in clothing as well! It’s much softer than it looks.”

“It is! We should tell Sesshomaru about how nice it feels! I’ll just go and tell him that you would _love_ to talk to him about how soft it is!”

_‘I’m not sure I’ve ever seen him move quite so fast, before.’_

“I’m sure that Lord Sesshomaru would not be interested in something so trivial! No need to involve him at all!”

Kagome just smiled as she turned to go back the way they had come.

“Let’s just head back, guys. I don’t sense any shards around and it’s a long walk.”

The energy that Kagome had unleashed didn’t seem to be dissipating at all. Kaede had told them that it might never weaken. Apparently, things like this had happened before, like on Mount Hakurei. As far as any records show, the weakest incident of them had left the land untouchable by youkai for over two hundred years. Edo’s residents were ecstatic about it. Kagome was uncomfortable.

It didn’t matter to her that none of them knew the reason that she had flooded the surrounding land with the purity. The strange reverent way they treated her had tripled and it made her nervous.

Since Inuyasha had decided that he was going to stay away from it in hopes of regaining his youkai half, she and Sango were stuck with only Miroku’s company. It had been a very trying two days. Kagome really was thinking about bringing a history book with bomb pictures back for Sango.

She eyed Miroku warily as he slowed his pace to match hers, letting Sango’s hurried steps carry her further and further away from them.

“Assuming you don’t turn me in and let me die a horribly painful death by acid, have you given any thought to training your abilities?”

“I wouldn’t really know where to start. There aren’t exactly a lot of real mikos in my time, and there are only two that we really know here. Kikyo would probably rather kill me than teach me, and Kaede didn’t train any more after Kikyo died.”

“There are shrines and temples where you could receive the proper instruction.”

“Sure. That would involve going to one and staying for more than two days, though.”

“Impatience has never been a trait that I’ve seen an abundance of in you, Kagome.”

She scrubbed at her face with her hands.

“It’s not that simple. There’s the shards, and Naraku, and-

“Have you forgotten, so soon, our conversation about living?”

“No, but-

Miroku stopped and grabbed Kagome’s wrist to halt her as well.

“What’s really stopping you?”

“I just… I don’t want to be alone. Even if everyone _did_ want to stay with me instead of trying to hunt down the shards… I don’t even know if a place like that would _let_ them stay.”

“So you haven’t forgotten, after all. You don’t need to make excuses, Kagome. There is no shame in wanting to live and keep the people who make you happy close to you.”

So maybe she wasn’t doing as well as she had hoped at the whole living in the present thing. She would just have to keep trying a little harder. It didn’t hurt that she had someone to remind her. Someone that had seen her in her worst moments, and stayed. Someone that she was starting to rely on enough that she couldn’t seem to keep her doubts and fears from when he asked for them.


	13. To Those Who Wait

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Posted 1.17.2020

Paradigm Shift

Chapter Thirteen: To Those Who Wait

… … …

There are, of course, many aspects of the universe that nobody can quite grasp. As we search and search to fill the void that aches inside ourselves, we are cheated by the universe. That _something_ that we need… it likes to be free, you see. So we can only really catch it when we take it by surprise. But how do you catch something by surprise when it exists to understand you and know you?

You wait for it to come to you.

Sometimes, you have to stop looking and stop searching; just be patient and _believe_. When you stop trying so hard to find the important things- purpose, happiness, love… yourself… that’s the moment when they start coming to you.

… … …

Something was poking her. Right in the middle of her back.

She wasn’t ready to wake up yet. She was _tired_ and it was _early_ but the thing was hard and she couldn’t seem to ignore it. So she rubbed her eyes, reached behind herself, and grabbed it. Her eyes flew open. Then she turned over to look at it.

Sitting innocently in her palm was a shard of the jewel. She didn’t know how it got there but it was there. It was there and it was pink and she couldn’t believe it.

“Sango! Miroku! Wake up!”

Kagome closed her fist around the little thing and scurried over to her friends, shaking them awake. Not something that she would typically dare to do. Sango wasn’t exactly a morning person and she tended to be… grumpy. Yes. Grumpy. That includes minor violence, right? The last time that Kagome had woken Sango too early, she had gotten an elbow in the ribs. The bruise didn’t go away for weeks.

So, of course, Kagome was reduced to placing her foot on Sango’s hip and trying to stay _as far away_ from Sango’s range of destruction.

“Go away.” The snarl was slurred from sleep, but it was still menacing. She pushed on Sango’s hip a few more times, and when she heard the part whine, part groan noise that signaled that the other woman would be aware of her surroundings in just a few minutes, Kagome moved a few feet to the right and grabbed Miroku’s shoulder.

Waking up Miroku was an altogether different sort of perilous. Kagome had only done it one other time in the two and a half years that she had known him. The experience still made her blush, and no one liked to mention it. Luckily, he was usually an early riser and no one had to bother him.

Under the circumstances, it could probably be excused that she had forgotten to be cautious.

That didn’t help her as he sat up abruptly, probably still mostly asleep, with his eyes still closed, even. Two lean arms wrapped themselves around her midsection and his body _twisted_. She let out an undignified squeak as he dragged her over top of him and curled around her with a deep, soft, _moan_ in her ear.

Then he pulled her back snug against his chest and there were _hands_. One wrapped under her ribs and splayed across her stomach. That wasn’t so bad, honestly. A little bit _overly affectionate_ , maybe and his rosary beads dug into her side uncomfortably, but it was rather tame compared to some of his normal antics.

It was what his other hand was doing in his sleep that had her sputtering in his embrace.

Long, agile fingers trailed down her side _seductively_. His palm was flattened against her, applying this soft sort of pressure that made her mind go blank. She gasped against his chest, which only made his mouth curve into a sleepy smile against the skin of her neck.

That evil, evil hand edged further along its desired path, over her hip, before it _dipped_ down to her pelvis and _pushed_ her bottom into him roughly.

His warm breath ghosted over her skin, raising the little hairs on the back of her neck.

Those warm, long fingers continued, sliding across her thigh and _down_ as he curled around her, bending her, so his fingertips nearly came to her knee. _And then_ , then those fingertips _curled_. They pressed roughly into the skin of her thigh as they were dragged back up her body, inching closer and _closer_ and-

“Oh my god, Miroku! Wake UP!”

“Mmmm. Shh. Good dream.”

She started wiggling around, trying to remover herself from that solid heat surrounding her. Which was most definitely a HUGE mistake, because he tightened his hold on her ribs and grasped her thigh and she felt his leg slip between hers as he _lifted_ and pulled her thighs apart.

Even as her vision blurred when he started _pressing_ that leg against her and _rubbing_ , and the back of her head pushed against his collar bone. She was hyper-aware that something else that was _very much not a jewel shard_ was pressing into her back.

She reached out her hand that wasn’t holding onto the jewel shard for dear life and locked her hand around Sango’s ankle and jerked on it as hard as she could.

“Sango! Heeeelp!”

The slayer turned bleary eyes to the two and blinked a few times. Miroku froze against her. She escaped.

Then she pulled her leg back and planted it with a thrust into his stomach, knocking the air from his lungs as she sat across from him with her chest heaving from the experience.

It really shouldn't have brought back that barely familiar fire and setting it to pool in her core when he wrapped _those hands_ around her ankle and calf. His eyes though. He was looking into her reddened face with an expression that was so serious, and so unlike his normal countenance that it pinned her to the spot, making her feel like little flashes of lightning sparked between their skin.

Then Sango’s fist connected with the top of his head and Kagome scooted out of his reach.

“I’m going to go out on a limb here and assume that this is why you warned me to never try waking him up.

Kagome’s voice was too low and too breathy as she answered.

“Yep. That’s why. Yep.” She tried to slowly and discretely close her legs together and hide the dampness that might have just been enough to soak through through the denim.

Miroku stood up between them and smoothed his hands- _‘ohgodthosehands’_ She thought, -down the front of his robes to straighten them. Kagome was thankful that she wasn’t confronted with any _evidence_ of just how he had responded to his exploration of her.

He cleared his throat and looked around for his shakujo, really hoping that he wasn’t about to be maimed for taking such liberties in his mostly asleep state.

“Forgive me, Kagome. I wasn’t fully aware of my actions.”

“Should have poked you awake with that staff.” She grumbled at him.

His mouth cracked into a lopsided grin as he remembered exactly what kind of _poking_ had actually woken him up.

“It’s **_early_** , Kagome. The sun is barely out.”

Kagome shook herself the rest of the way out of her stupor and held out her fist to them.

“I know, but look! A shard! It was just there next to me when I woke up.”

But when she opened her hand it was empty. She didn’t move for a moment or two, and then she was off in a flurry. She frantically searched the ground for the sliver, lifting the bunched up pile of sheets.

“No. No, it was here!”

She couldn’t find it anywhere, though.

“I can feel it! It’s here!”

They spent a while looking for it, but as the awareness of the shard faded into the very edges of her senses, they gave up and started to break camp.

“You must have been having a vivid dream, Kagome.” Sango told her as they set back out toward the perimeter of where her energy had spread. It was still half a day’s walk to the edge where their companions were waiting.

… … …

“What’s that supposed to mean? How do you ‘ _sort of’_ find a shard?”

“She thought she found one when we woke up, Inuyasha. It turned out to just be a dream though.” Sango told him’

“I’m telling you! It was there!”

“It couldn’t have been, Kagome! We looked! For a long time!”

“It was _there_ , Sango! It was…” Kagome’s anger fled and her voice tapered into a whisper.

This was so frustrating. She knew that she had felt it. She had been holding it right there in her hand. She had felt it on her back when she woke up. Her hand hurt and itched from where she had been holding it so tightly. It was real. It had been there. She knew it had been there.

She just didn’t know what had happened to it.

… … …

The rest of the day passed uneventfully. They took to the air, staying just above the canopy of the trees, deciding that they should cover as much space as they could during the day. Staying low would ensure that Kagome was close enough to sense any stray shards. The sooner they could reach the next village, the sooner they could ask around for rumors of anything unusual.

Having Kouga around turned out to be more useful than any of them had thought. He was fast enough to stay on the ground and weave back and forth across the terrain in search of anyone that they could interrogate.

It was pretty boring, overall. Without any shards, now, they weren’t encountering any youkai- not even weak ones- that were trying to steal the insidious little slivers away for themselves.

Meals were more exciting than ever, at least. Having two powerful, full-blooded youkai in their party who preferred to eat fresh- preferably very undercooked- meat, gone were the days of nothing but ramen and granola.

After a few days that held more of the same; boring, quiet, and frustrating- they agreed that in the two days they had spent caring for Kagome in her weakened state, the nearest shards most have been found, snatched up, and carried off by whatever random youkai had escaped and fled the vicinity as Kagome had her little… surge.

The first village hadn’t yielded any strange talk that could lead them to a shard. Neither had the second village.

Having spent the last four or five days on their search, and with the beginning of summer upon them; with the temperature starting to rise, they were all ready to stop when they spotted a hot spring sitting so invitingly in their path.

… … …

Kagome knew that the guys of the group were waiting for her to finish up and let them have their turn in the water, but it was just so relaxing here.

There was a moderately sized waterfall nearby that fed into a little pond. Little but deep, they had discovered. The tiny pond looked like it could barely hold two people, and only if they were shoulder-to-shoulder. From the pond, the smallest flow of water had carved a torrential current that rushed through the foliage and downhill. Fast as it was, the thing was barely wider than her arm from wrist to elbow.

But Kagome had found a perfect little spot on the edge of the hot spring where the stream, if it could realistically be called a stream, had worn away the rock. In a blessedly Kagome-sized swirl where the chilly water invaded the spring, it felt heavenly.

The water was almost exactly the way she would have kept it if she was in her tub at home, and the swirling water around her form was calming and the fast-paced water on her back felt like she imagined the jets in one of those fancy jacuzzi pools would.

So with her wet hair piled on top of her head and secured with a green sprig of bamboo, She hummed in contentment, snuggled down into the water up to her nose.

She was more relaxed than she had been in what felt like years, but was really only about two months, when she felt it. A little tingling at the edge of her senses. Which was very quickly getting stronger. She pulled herself, internally weeping at the need to leave the water, over the smooth rocks and jogged over to her clothes.

“There’s a shard coming! Fast!” She screamed out as she started throwing on her apparel over her soaked skin.

She was standing there, with her underwear astray, hopping on one foot with only one leg covered by her jeans, her damp shirt on backward, and her bra dangling by a strap from her teeth, when the tall foliage parted and Kouga stumbled out of the underbrush onto the bank of the spring with Miroku on one side of him and Inuyasha on the other. Sango, with Shippou on her shoulder and Kirara in her arms, nearly collided with Kouga’s back as he came to a sudden stop.

As she did her best to impersonate a statue, a couple of ridiculous thoughts ran through her mind,-

 _‘That was really fast.’_ and _‘Oh. Huh. I’ve never seen Miroku in just his pants before.’_ and _‘Hey. There’s some silver in Inuyasha’s hair now.’ and ‘Oh look, scandals too. SANDALS!’_

-and several things happened in quick succession.

Shippou launched himself at Inuyasha and covered his face with his little body.

Sango dropped Kirara and reached her arm around Mirou, slapping her hand over his eyes.

Sesshomaru dropped out of _somewhere_ above her, thankfully only giving her a very brief glance, and spread his hand over Kouga’s face, pushing his head back as Kouga tried to take a step toward Kagome with a tortured “Nnggh.”

And Rin ran toward her, throwing her arms wide in an attempt to shield her from view.

“Where is the shard coming from?”

After a lengthy pause as Kagome pulled herself out of her shock, Sesshomaru’s question registered, and she pointed across the steamy air and in the direction of the waterfall.

As sweet as Rin was, Kagome was thankful when Kirara’s large bulk hid her from view while she struggled into her pants.

She was fully clothed, minus the bra hanging from her back pocket and the sock-stuffed shoes in her hand, when Ah-Un meandered through the bushes and poked his heads through the leaves with Jaken on one neck, holding his reins.

“Har far is it?” Inuyasha demanded, pulling an uncompliant Shippou from his head.

“Not. It's coming fast. This way.” She stepped over the miniature river and jogged alongside it toward the tug of the jewel, thankful for the soft, damp, soil and it’s lack of sharp stones on her bare feet.

When Kagome skid to a halt and turned, stunned, and took off back the way they has come from, the others followed in confusion.

“Did it pass us!?” Inuyasha yelled.

“I didn’t see any youkai.”

“Maybe it’s a water imp, Sango! Can you see anything?” Miroku suggested, peering into the stream as he ran.

“It’s not deep enough for that.

Sesshomaru took to the sky in search of their foe.

When they reached the stream’s ends where only a trickle of water dampened the surrounding earth, they saw it.

There was no youkai. It was just _laying there_ , carried away with the current. Sitting malicious and black right there in the mud.

Kagome reached out, plucking it out of the muck, and wrapped her fingers around it with her eyes closed to purify it.

There was a sharp pinch and she gasped and opened her hand.

It wasn’t there.


	14. Confusion

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Posted 1.18.2020  
> Unedited

Paradigm Shift

Chapter Fourteen: Confusion

… … …

“I don’t Know, Inuyasha! I don’t know!”

“How can you not know?! What the hell did you do?”

“I didn’t do _anything_. It was just _gone_. You saw it happen! You were right there! It’s the same thing that happened before! I don’t know!”

The argument had been going in circles for hours. It would drop off and pick back up in lulls, but Kagome was getting tired of saying the same thing over and over again. He never listened to her about anything before now, and he wasn’t listening to her now, and she doubted that he would ever really listen to her.

Everyone had given up on separating them. Prior experience told them that Inuyasha and Kagome would fight until they burned out; no one could really stop them for long, and more often than not anyone who tried would either get dragged into the middle or get lashed out at.

Miroku had mumbled something about meditation and wandered off.

Kouga had gone who-knows-where to just be away from them while they screamed at each other.

Sango had decided that it would be best to remove Rin and Shippou from the whole mess. She had taken them to try and forage up some sort of berries or other edibles for later.

“Just stop, Inuyasha!” She wrapped her arms around herself, just wanting the yelling to end.

“What use is it if you just make them all disappear!?”

Her head snapped upward to him. _‘what use is it… what use am I?’_ The question rang in her ears and she could see him still yelling, but she wasn’t listening anymore. There was a flare of hurt, but it was quickly pushed away by rising anger.

She felt her nails digging into her arms as it built. _‘ **this** is useless. All of it. It’s so different now; when he acts like this.’_

“If I’m so useless, Inuyasha, maybe you should just go get Kikyo to help you and just let me go back home and stay there!”

Kagome felt Sesshomaru’s hand on her shoulder, but she shrugged it off. She knew that he had been sitting there _supervising_ them, and _that_ was its own brand of aggravating. Right now she couldn’t be bothered with that because Inuyasha looked like _he was actually considering_ what she had just yelled in anger.

“You’re seriously thinking about it. I can’t believe you’re seriously thinking about it.”

Sesshomaru’s hand was on her shoulder again, squeezing more insistently this time.

“I…. Kagome. I wasn’t-

But she was sick of the lies and the secrets and the avoidance. She was done and she couldn’t just let it pass anymore by telling herself that she loved him and he was just…Inuyasha. Couldn’t fool herself into thinking that he was just trying to protect her with it all.

“I can’t believe you, Inuyasha. After everything that she’s done to prove that she would take any opportunity to kills us-

“He tried to kill us too, and you let him come with us!”

“I didn’t **_let_** him do anything! He does whatever he wants, and you know it! As if we could stop him!”

Sesshomaru pulled on her shoulder, trying to distract her.

“You **_must calm down_**, Kagome.”

But she was too angry with Inuyasha, now, to pay attention to Sesshomaru.

“Pf!”

“Don’t _pfft_ me! I’m so tired of you always treating me like I’m just some tool to you! _Unless, **of course** , Kikyo _isn’t nearby and you decide to use me as a substitute for her when you want to drop the mask!”

“Oh! Sure! So you decide to just go get _my brother_ to replace me when you-

“INUYASHA! SIT!”

They stared at each other, somewhere between shock and hysteria. They both took a step back from one another. Nothing happened. Of course nothing happened. The necklace had broken… that night. _That_ night.

Kagome felt Sesshomaru’s arm wrap around her waist as she tried to take another step away from Inuyasha and backed into his armor instead.

_‘We really are broken. There’s nothing left to connect us, anymore. We can’t even **talk** to each other.’_

Then she was struggling uselessly against that immovable arm. All kicking legs and swinging elbows and slapping hands.

“Let me go! Put me **_down_** , Sesshomaru!”

She didn’t care where she would go, but she wanted to be _away_ , wanted to put _distance_ between them. Wanted to run from the _wrongness_ of this new reality.

Then Sesshomaru turned and ran, carrying her with him. In an instant, she was being dropped onto Miroku’s lap where he sat in rumination.

“What the hell, Sesshomaru!?”

Kagome was up, out of Miroku’s lap, and glaring at Sesshomaru with everything she was worth.

Miroku was still sitting there, just looking on in astonishment.

Sesshomaru growled, _really growled_ , at her and pushed her chest so that she fell back onto Miroku again. He locked his now pink-tinged eyes onto the monk.

“Fix her! Fix her now!” He snapped.

“ ** _Fix-_**

She began to protest, absolutely livid, but was cut off when Miroku wrapped his body around her, forcing her to curl into a vibrating ball of anger, keeping her contained within his arms and covering her mouth in a steely grip with his hand.

Then she was _drowning_ in him. His aura was _swallowing_ her. Spreading out like wildfire under them and around them, weaving itself into a cage and _compressing her_ and she couldn’t _breathe_.

“Calm _down_ , Kagome. Breathe.” He implored her. “Just _breathe_.” His voice was firm and urgent and she _bit his hand_. He didn’t let her go, didn’t move his hand, didn’t release her from his grasp.

So she breathed. Slowly, deeply.

“Good girl. Just keep breathing.” He told her. “Just listen to me and try not to think. Shut it all out.”

She closed her eyes.

“That’s it. Now fist your hands and then relax them. Focus on that.”

She did.

“Keep doing that. Relax your arms. Good. Good girl. Now your shoulders. Just breathe.”

Miroku moved his hand away from Kagome’s mouth and rested it on her forehead as he slowly uncurled their bodies from the hunched position.

“Shh. Just focus on breathing and let yourself completely loosen. Listen to my voice.”

He pulled her head to rest against his shoulder and then moved it, pushing it into her spine to straighten her back into a straight line.

“Just like that, you’ve got it.”

He looked over to Sesshomaru, who was still standing nearby, watching. He took in the burns that covered face and neck, hiding some of his markings, and he pushed his thumbs into the muscles around Kagome’s shoulder blades.

As he felt her calm completely, Miroky smoothed his hands down and then up across her back, then over her shoulders, across her collarbone, and down her arms where they finally reached her wrists, turning her hands over and resting his palms against hers.

“Okay, Kagome. Now come back to me.”

He pressed his hands against hers.

“Press your hands up and into mine. Mhm. Listen around us. Hear the sounds of the water. The birds. The wind in the trees.”

He felt the answering press against his hands.

“Now come back. Open your eyes.”

So she did. Then she twisted to look at him over her shoulder.

“What was that?” She asked, feeling steadier and calmer than she remembered ever being.

“Guided meditation. I’ve never had to subdue someone both bodily and with my energy before, admittedly.”

“Can I get up now?”

“If you’re calm and you’d like to, yes.”

She lifted herself to her feet, keeping her back to both Sesshomaru and Miroku.

“Well, I’d apologize for my temper, but I keep getting scolded for saying sorry to people.”

“It is not your temper that worries me, Kagome.” Sesshomaru told her.

When she turned to ask what he had meant, the inquiry was forgotten in favor of brushing her fingers over the burns on his face with a tremble.

“Did I do this?” He nodded.

“It will heal. You must train, Kagome.” He pulled her bottom lip from her teeth, gently. “If you were to purify the whole of Japan, then where would I live?”

The teasing tugged a faint burst of laughter from her and she bobbed her head in response.

“For now, I suggest you ask him,” He motioned to Miroku. “to assist you in learning his meditations.”

As worried as he was about Kagome and the situation, Miroku didn’t entertain the thought of refusing her for even a second. While it might not be… ideal… for him to train her, she needed something that would steady her until they found someone who could properly assist her.

“That would actually be wise, Kagome. Our holy powers are not the same, but they do come from the same place; rooted in our emotions. Learning some meditative techniques may help prevent any more flares of that magnitude. I would be honored to help you.”

Kagome had to admit that she was pretty impressed with the results.

The three of them made their way towards the flickering light of the fire and conferred over what needed to happen next. Between the fact that two shards had now disappeared as soon as she had touched then, and that it had now become undeniable that Kagome wouldn’t be able to put off instruction and guidance anymore.

With everyone’s tempers quiet, the unstable nature of Kagome’s maturing abilities was brought back to the forefront of their attention, and they decided to split the group for now. Kouga, Inuyasha, and Sango would search the eastern lands nearby for rumors and leads of the Shikon shards, in hopes of collecting a few while Kagome, Miroku, and Sesshomaru would head to the borders of the western lands where Atsuta Shrine was nestled into the mountains of Sesshomaru’s territories. It was quite a distance away and they would have to backtrack their recent progress; skirting around the edges of the now-sacred land that protected Edo. Jaken would accompany Rin and Shippou on Ah-Un to the safety of the Western Hall.

They would all meet back up in two months’ time, in a village just north of Edo.

… … …

In the dying light, the friends gathered around each other for the last meal that they would share in the long weeks ahead. Right now, with a backdrop of woven purples and reds, Rin was happily bouncing to and fro among the coterie; sharing a story from her travels with Sesshomaru.

She was alight with excitement and had her audience enthralled. Kagome thought that she could grow to be a highly sought after Rokugo, given time. Her friends were rapt with attention as she moved around and through them. Kagome was still too lost in her thoughts to fully focus on Rin’s tale of adventure and it seemed that she wasn’t the only one.

Kouga had moved from his place by Sango, across from her, and settled himself at her side. He tucked her hair back over her ear and leaned in to whisper to her.

“Come with me later.”

Kagome twisted her neck and peered at him, curious but mystified.

“After they all fall asleep. I want to show you something.”

She hesitated. Without any clues other than they would be alone, the idea was daunting for her. The last two times that she had found herself alone with the wolf prince, things had been… heated. Her reluctance must have shown on her face because he smoothed his knuckles down her cheek tenderly.

“I know that I haven’t completely earned back your trust, but please Kagome. I promise not to hurt you.” He laid his hand on her bent knee. “Or… scare you. I promise. You’ll love this.”

It’s not that Kagome was afraid of him or what he might have in mind. She didn’t need his promises of her security, she knew that Kouga wouldn’t hurt her. She was just getting worn out with all of the… ehhem.. situations that she was finding herself caught up in.

Not that her body wasn’t receptive to the attentions, unfortunately. If she was totally honest with herself, underneath the shyness and confusion and uncertainty that came with her inexperience and her personal ideals concerning… _that_ … then more of her than just her body was pretty appreciative of the new sensations. She hadn’t exactly protested much when her mother had dragged her out to the doctor on her last visit to get that _preventative_ shot.

**_“”Kagome. I’m your mother. I was your age once, you know. You were born before I was twenty-one.””_ **

**_“”I know mama, but-_ **

**_“Sweetie. It worried me enough when you were had two good looking men following you around. Now you have four. From your stories, one of them can’t keep his hands to himself, one is madly in love with you and is adamant that you’re going to marry him, one is possessive, and the other is Inuyasha. I know you love him, Kagome. Besides! It’s just in case!””_ **

**_“”Unnnngh. Maaamaa.””_ **

**_“”It would make me feel better.””_ **

**_“”….fine..”_ **

**_“”It lasts three months and you don’t even have to carry anything around!””_ **

**_“”Unngh..””_ **

So Kagome had been pulled along, red-faced and resigned, and gotten a shot in her arm two days before she had poked her head out of the well to find Sesshomaru about to murder her friends.

She could feel her ears burning as she remembered that whole experience. There had been _talking_ and _explaining_ that had both made her feel well informed and humiliated.

She patted Kouga’s hand and gave him a nervous smile and a jerky nod. He scooted a little closer to him and she leaned her head onto his arm as they turned their attention to the buddling little rokugo.

… … …

Later, with the stars shining bright in the dark sky, when Kagome was sure that everyone had fallen asleep, she watched as Kouga rose and gave her a meaningful look before walking into the trees. She rolled herself up in her sheet and curled into a ball, feeling snug and comforted by the little bit of pressure from the tightness of the sheet around her, before discarding the fabric and standing to join him.

She nearly screamed in fright when strong fingers captured her wrist. Heart pounding against her chest, she crouched before Sesshomaru, who had taken to situating himself at her back every night. She glared at his visage as she used her unrestrained hand to smooth down the dark pile of softness cradled in his lap.

She almost lost control over herself, barely managing to keep from laughing as she observed that Shippou had been captured and Rin was using him as a teddy bear.

 _‘So possessive.”_ She thought. _‘No need to wonder where she learned that particular personality trait.’_

“I thought you were asleep.”

“Do you require my presence?” He asked, ignoring her previous words.

She shook her head at him.

“No. I’ll be okay. He just wants to show me something.”

She didn’t realize just how that could be taken until The pale brow lifted on his face.

“Oh! No! I mean… I don’t think so, but really! I’ll be okay.” She laid her hand on his where it still held her other wrist and her face softened.

“If you do, I shall not hesitate.”

“I know. I’ll scream really loud if he tries any funny business.” She said. Then, even quieter, “I don’t think Kouga would ever let himself lose it like that again, anyway. Besides. He didn’t actually hurt me then, either.”

The corner of his mouth quirked upward and he set her wrist free. She stood and took two steps from him, but faltered and turned back, bending over him as his eyes followed her actions.

She brushed his bangs from his forehead and pressed a soft kiss into the moon that she had uncovered.

“Thank you. For caring. Thank you.”

He closed his eyes and pulled his fingers through Rin’s hair as she walked away.

… … …

Kouga was waiting for her about a dozen paces into the forest. He held his hand out to her and she took it easily, twining their fingers together as he led them deeper through the thick, grayscale undergrowth. They stopped before a proud, thick tree that split into two near the bottom. There was a bowl-shaped crevice at the junction of the dual trunk. It would have easily been able to accommodate her- if it wasn’t for the thriving plant that was using the crevice as its abode.

“It’s called the Night Queen.” He told her, pulling her down to sit on his thighs, near his knees, as he stretched out his legs in front of them on the damp layer of the forest ground. He leaned back on his hands as Kagome studied the plant. “It only blooms at night, and doesn’t last for long when it does. It’s really rare, you know.”

He pointed back to the plant when she twisted to smile at him.

“Just watch.”

It took a long while, and the anticipation was starting to get to her, when she noticed the sepals on the large buds start to curl away from tightly coiled white petals. She leaned forward to watch, putting her hands on Kouga’s shins and leaning on them, wanting to get closer but at the same time, not wanting to disturb the plant.

The flowers slowly began to unfurl in a spiral, twisting open as they woke to greet the moon and the two of them.

Then Kagome’s breath hitched as the most amazing thing happened. As the pointed, round, white petals began to open into a cup; framed by longer, narrow petals… the center of the flowers began to glow.

The glow dimmed but was steady in the cradle of the flowers’ cupped middles. It was the most beautiful thing that Kagome had ever seen. Well, it had been. Until tiny little specks of matching light began to float around her and Kouga.

Some of them flitted around quickly and some danced slowly in lazy patterns, but they all gravitated to the blooms. When one of the little orbs would touch the glow of a flower, a tiny spark would alight. Each spark contrasted with the uniform glow of the orbs and the flowers, shooting off in all sorts of different colors.

Kagome wiggled backward into Kouga’s lap so that she could keep her eyes on the enchanting spectacle while she whispered to him in awe.

“What are they?”

He straightened up, moving his hands to hang over her shoulders, and resting his chin on top of Kagome’s head as he answered. Kagome rubbed her dainty palms over his forearms as she waited.

“They’re youkai. I don’t actually remember what they’re called, but they’re just as rare as the Night Queen. I’ve seen the flower bloom once before, when I was a pup and my dad was teaching me how to hunt for the first time, and he told me the stories about the youkai that come to carry the seeds away, but there weren’t any around that night.

His head and arms dipped and rose when she let out a heavy, contented sigh.

“It’s amazing, Kouga. _They’re_ amazing.”

“Mhm. They are, huh?”

“Yeah.”

They sat there and watched for a while before Kagome spoke again.

“Will you tell me the stories?”

He shifted himself into a cross-legged position, letting Kagome’s bottom bounce off of his thighs and onto the ground in the space that opened in his lap. Elbows still on her shoulders, his hands came up to rest on top of her head under his chin and he smiled.

“It’s said that, hundreds of years ago, there was once a beautiful, human princess. Her skin was whiter than snow and gleamed with the light of the moon. Her eyes were the color of polished silver, and her long, white, wild hair could capture a rainbow more easily than a gleaming crystal. ”

Kagome listened intently, eager to hear the tale.

“Rumors of her dreamlike beauty that rivaled the moon reached the ears of a youkai lord who was quickly gaining power and influence. He traveled to her, seeking to find out for himself if the rumors were true.”

Kouga opened his hands and pressed a kiss to her hair before replacing them and continuing the story.

“When he set his eyes upon her, he was entranced. He waited long nights and long days; until he finally caught her alone. She was sat beneath the hanging strands of a willow on the edge of a lake, staring into the reflection of the moon on the water and wishing that she could touch it, envious of its freedom.”

Kagome reached a hand out, slowly, as one of the bright youkai came near and hovered before her. She couldn’t see them, but she could feel its tiny feet on her fingertip and it landed on her. When it flew away again they could both see a tiny glowing seed in the spot that it had stood.

Kouga plucked a long, wide blade of grass from the ground at their side, holding it flat for her. Kagome carefully put the seed on it and watched as Kouga folded and tied the leaf; securing the gift tightly in a neat little grass package for her.

“The youkai lord approached the princess, drawing out her wishes and envies with kind words. He gave a kiss to the girl that rivaled the moon, under the light of that moon that she loved. They fell in love and were set to marry soon after.”

Kagome brought the seed-package to her chest and cradled it there.

“But the youkai lord had been betrothed to another lord’s daughter on the day of their births. Her family claimed to have descended from the moon goddess and she believed that only she had the right to claim the beauty of the moon as her own, and so her anger was two-fold.”

The sparks had stopped now, and the youkai were thinning; carrying their seeds away.

“The youkai lord’s intended mate waited until he was called from the princess on an urgent call from his highest-ranking general. She crept into the room where the princess slept and spirited her away in the night. When the princess woke, she was bound to the middle of a split tree; with the youkai woman’s malevolent presence before her. The princess was told that she would never be allowed to marry the youkai lord. Would forever be fragile and quick to die. Would never be filled with child, and would never see the light of the sun again. Then the princess was cursed by the jealous woman. She became the Night Queen, the flower with the hollow center that would only bloom in darkness, and fade before morning’s light.”

“That’s so sad.”

“The youkai lord heard of the actions of the one that he had been promised to at his birth, and he, distraught, returned as swiftly as he was able to his love’s side. It was as he had been told, and in his grief, his essence expanded around him, lighting the flower at its center and wrapping around the servants that tended the princess. The servants were changed, keeping to their purpose and nature; hardly seen and never quite understood. He could not save her, but he had given himself to her and she would be forever fertile; the mixing of their essences would be carried away every night so that they could bloom and flourish, lighting the night and sharing their love with the world.

Kagome scrubbed the tears from her eyes and pulled Kouga’s arms around her shoulders.

“How long will it last?”

“Not long. It’ll start dying when the youkai that take the seeds are all gone.”

They stayed there and watched until the end, when the flowers shriveled and fell to the ground.

As it fell, Kouga tilted Kagome’s head back so that he could meet her eyes. His look was tender and his touch was light on her chin.

“You’ll never love me, will you Kagome?”

It startled her and she slid from his lap to kneel in front of him, her hands braced on his knees.

“I do love you, Kouga! I always will!”

“But not the way I want you to. Not the way I love you.”

He gathered her hands up between his and rested her fingers on his lips. Her eyes watered.

“I… No, Kouga. Not that way. I’m so sorry.”

“It’s okay, Kagome. I’ve known it for a long time, never could give up though.”

He chuckled and she laughed.

“Stubborn.” She accused.

“Hey! Look who’s talking!”

Another shared laugh.

“I guess I’ll never win against those two dogs, huh?”

Kagome’s face showed her shock at the assumption.

“No! I mean, Yes! I mean. Ugh. Okay, let me start over.”

He stood and tugged her up with him.

“Alright, but tell me while we want if you have to say it. We should get back so that we can see everyone before we separate.”

“Oh. Alright…”

He kept her hand hostage while they walked, unhurried.

“It’s… Sesshomaru and me aren’t… that. I’m not in love with him or anything. Pretty sure he feels that same.”

“You two have a pretty weird relationship, then.”

She smiled and agreed with him.

“Yeah. It’s strange, I’ll give you that. It’s not love though. It’s just…Sesshomaru.” She laughed in bemusement. “I was starting to think that the whole _dogs are perfectly loyal_ thing was a myth, but I think that’s what’s under it. Even if it’s to himself and his word, he’s not going to break his promise to take care of me for what he thinks I did. I just think that neither of us were expecting to be friends, too.”

“You’re maddening, Kagome. You really are.”

She frowned at him.

“What’s that supposed to mean?!”

“It means that you have no idea how amazing you are or how you make people want to be around you, protect you, love you any way that you’ll let them.”

“I’m not all that great, Kouga.”

He stopped and she followed.

“Yes. You are.”

The look in his eyes reminded her of that night in the cave, and it made her squirm; hovering somewhere between wanting to escape and wanting to experience that heat again.

“Kagome?”

“Uh-huh…?”

“Now that you’ve turned me down for good and I’ve accepted it, would you let me have just one thing from you?”

“Hmm?”

He brought his face to hers, so close that his breath ruffled her hair, and stopped. Blue on blue; locked together.

“Kouga.. I don’t… I told you..” Her voice was shaking as hard as the rest of her.

“I know. I’m not asking for anything else. I understand if you say no.”

Then his hand slid over her cheek and pushed into her thick hair. He didn’t try to pull her closer, just rested there, twisting the black silk through his fingers.

Kagome trembled with nerves as she hooked the fingertips of both of her hands over the top of the armor on his chest. His skin was burning on the backs of her fingers and she made up her mind.

She gripped the metal harder as she thought that she liked the idea that Kouga would be her first kiss. After _everything_ and with them both knowing that they would never be mated or married. It was fitting, she thought, that this man take her first kiss.

She wanted to give it to him, gladly, because she did love him in her own way, and she couldn’t think of anyone else that would appreciate the gift in the way he would. Because she thought that, if he wanted it, he deserved to have this gift that she could only ever give once. She knew it would be safe with him. It would live in his heart the same way it would live in hers.

And when she stood up and pressed her lips to his, it didn’t feel like a goodbye. She had known that it wouldn’t It felt like a promise. A promise that they would be closer than any of her other friends could claim to be to her. A promise that they would never abandon each other. A promise that they would just be _them_ , and that it didn’t matter what anyone else thought.

Some friendships might be deep, but theirs would be deeper. Some might be strong but theirs would be stronger, and some might be loyal, but those friendships would never compare to _them_ ,

The kiss was sweet and light, if not altogether chaste and certainly not short.

And as they both closed their eyes, a thin ribbon of pink pushed out from Kagome’s back, above her heart. Unseen, it wrapped around them both, tightened, and passed through Kagome to encase Kouga, settling gently into his skin.


	15. ... ... ...

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Posted 1.19.2020

AN: The flower from the last chapter is a real flower! Granted, I took some liberties and I made up the fairy tale, but it’s real and it’s one of the rarest flowers in the world. It's native to Japan, which works really well. It actually does grow in the crevice of split trees in the wild! Its real name is Queen of the Night.

… … …

Paradigm Shift

Chapter Fifteen

… … …

Kagome was starting to think that she might have some latent masochistic tendencies. Staying up all night, which was quickly becoming some sort of proxy habit, was starting to get painful. In a very real physical way. Nevermind the tripping and stumbling and falling because she couldn’t pay attention through the sleepy haze. No, this _yawning_. It was the worst. Like torture. She couldn't stop yawning. Now her jaw ached and her eyes watered when it happened and she might have swallowed a bug.

“Ahh...Kagome?”

She squinted at Inuyasha when he called her name, blinking rapidly to try and focus her vision.

“Inuyasha? What is it?” The hard tone of voice that she had been trying for had ended up just sounding whiny, tired as she was. She was bemused by the fact that at least it had the same effect that she had been trying for. Inuyasha looked uncomfortable.

He sat down next to her in front of the vines of wineberries that she was stripping and setting into the center of one of her ‘sheet’ things. She’s cut it into four pieces and was methodically piling the berries next to the fiddleheads she had already found. He fidgeted around next to her for a while before starting to pluck the little treasures and drop them on the closest scrap of fabric.

“Inuyasha? What are you doing?”

“Uh. Helping?”

“Okay. Why?”

She yawned widely and sagged her shoulders.

“You look tired.” He was tempted to toss a wineberry into her open mouth, but figured that he was already pushing his luck.

“Way to state the obvious, Inuyasha.

His cheeks puffed up with air as she rolled her eyes at him. The mood was strained as the silence stretched out between them. Kagome was almost ready to tell him to go away when he spoke up again, looking anywhere but at her.

“You know my Tetsusaiga keeps my youkai calm.”

“Obvious, Inuyasha- and random, by the way.”

“No. Just hear me out.”

“Haven’t I spent enough time listening to whatever you want to say to me?”

He flinched away from her.

“I’m sor-

“Don’t! Just _don’t_.”

Kagome started tying up her bundles of food, ready to be away from him.

“This is important!”

“It’s always important, Inuyasha!”

Kagome hauled herself up with the bundles and started to walk away, but Inuyasha was there, in front of here, with his hands in front of his chest in surrender.

“I need you to take it, Kagome.”

“What?”

“Tetsusaiga. I want you to take it.”

She just blinked at him, wondering if she had fallen asleep after all, and was having a really odd dream.

“I was thinking-

“Ooo. A new hobby for you.”

He glared at her. She tried to walk around him.

“Maybe I’ll go back to normal faster, without it.”

She hadn’t thought of that. It sounded like a pretty bad idea though.

“Inuyasha… it might-

“So you’ll do it?”

“You’re- It’s a bad idea, Inuyasha. What if you _do_ go back to normal, but it doesn’t stop? When you’re like that… you could kill or hurt people.”

Inuyasha hung his head, knowing that she was right, and didn’t follow her or try to stop her as she walked away from him.

… … …

Sango was leaning against a tree, bent over, tightening the straps that held her armor in place when Kagome set a sea green package of foraged food by her foot. She lifted her head and smiled at her tired friend.

“Thank you, Kagome.”

“Yeah, no problem.”

Sango laughed at the dramatic flourish that Kagome used to plop down beside her and lean her tired skull against her thigh.

“You look exhausted, Kagome.”

“So I keep getting told.”

Sango reached down and patted Kagome’s head a few times, smiling.

“Maybe you should try to _sleep_ when we all settle in to go to _sleep_.”

Kagome groaned and pressed her cheek into Sango’s thigh.

“Ugh. It’s not my fault, you know. People keep dragging me off to talk. I guess nighttime is the best time to hold a conversation, now.”

“Want to borrow Hiraikotsu to ward off overly talkative friends? If you’re careful, it won’t kill them.”

Kagome laughed this time.

“No, but it’s tempting.”

Sango ruffled Kagome’s hair and pressed her face into her leg in a mock-hug.

“Can I have my leg back? I need to go over there.” She pointed to where her katana and the rest of her clothes were waiting a few feet away. “And get my things.”

“Nope!” Kagome replied cheerfully, wrapping her arms around the leg in question and holding onto it tightly. “It’s my leg now. My favorite leg. It has to stay with me forever so that we won’t be apart and alone with stupid boys.”

Sango’s whole body shook at Kagome’s proclamation as she laughed.

“You’ll have Kirara with you at least! She’s a girl! I’ll have to put up with _those_ two.” She pointed at Kouga and Inuyasha who were apparently trying to stare each other to death.

Kagome squeezed her leg even tighter.

“Yeah but I have to deal with _Miroku_.”

“Yeah, you’re right. I’m not sure what’s worse.”

Sango poked Kagome’s head.

“I really do need my leg though. I’m starting to not be able to feel it.”

Kagome released it reluctantly and Sango crouched down to get closer to her.

“Come on, Kagome. You’re practically my little sister. I know something’s bothering you.”

“Well, we’re all going to be apart for so long.”

“True, but there’s something else, isn’t there?”

“Inuyasha’s a jerk.”

Sango pressed her forehead to Kagome’s.

“I heard. Miroku was telling me about what happened.”

Kagome rotated her head, not breaking their foreheads apart, and looked over to Miroku. He was sitting by a large, flat stone near the trees, angled to face the blank slips of paper that he had laid out on the stone, and she could only see the side of his body and face as he wrote.

“I’m sorry that we all left you alone with him while he was like that.”

“I wasn’t alone. Sesshomaru stayed there. He does that a lot, now; makes sure I’m not alone. It’s okay though. I’m glad Rin and Shippou weren’t there for it. Shippou has seen enough of Inuyasha’s temper over the years, anyway.”

“That’s true.”

“Yeah… What did Miroku tell you?”

“That you almost lost control of your energy again.”

“Yeah.”

“And that he and Sesshomaru had a hard time calming you down.”

Kagome scoffed and pulled away from Sango. They sat close, shoulders pressed together and Kagome rubbed between her eyes with two fingers.

“That’s one way to put it. Apparently, I almost,” She curved her hands around in a circular motion and then down in a straight line to the dirt. “Pchhhhew! Blew them up.”

Sango wasn’t sure what exactly Kagome was trying to pantomime for her, but she got a general idea that it had been pretty bad.

“I burned Sesshomaru.”

Sango stretched her back and peered over Kagome’s head.

“He looks fine to me.”

“Well, yeah, **_now_**. That’s not what I was talking about though. Inuyasha wanted to give me Tetsusaiga.”

“ _Why_!?” The startled whisper made Kagome shake her head as she answered.

“He thinks that it might make his youkai half come back faster. We don’t even know if it ever _will_ come back though.”

“His hair is starting to change back.”

“Yeah, well, hair doesn’t do much good in a fight. I think he feels kinda useless right now.”

Sango tried to stifle a snicker in one hand, but it didn’t work very well.

“What’s so funny?”

Kagome reached across Sango’s lap, plucking up the makeshift bag of wild food and dropping it in the slayer’s lap.

“Nothing, really. Nothing and all of it. You’re sitting here with me, still worried about Inuyasha. Even after everything he’s done and the way he’s treated you all of the time.”

“He’s not all that bad…”

“He is.” Sango waved her hand. “But after all of that, you’re worried and now he’s finally getting an idea of how he always made you feel. It’s a _little_ funny. Even though it’s not.”

One corner of Kagome’s mouth lifted and she snorted at the thought.

“I’m a sucker for hopeless cases, I guess.”

“Well that’s good, or I’d never be here.”

Sango squeaked when Kagome pinched her leg at that statement.

“The thing is… his idea isn’t completely horrible… I guess. I’m mad at him, still, and I didn’t tell him so, but separating him from Tetsusaiga might work.”

“What if he-

“Yeah, that’s what I told him.”

“Then how is it a good idea?”

Kagome looked at Sango from under her lashes.

“Ohh noo!” She drew out the words, lengthening them as she leaned back and lengthened the space between herself and Kagome. “I know that look. You’re about to ask me to do som…” Her eyes unfocused, staring off at nothing while the pieces clicked. “You want me to take it from him.”

Kagome propped her chin on Sango’s shoulder and stared at her ear.

“Just every now and then, to try… you know? It could work. I can’t do it, because what if something bad _does_ happen and I’m half the country away?”

Sango sighed and shrugged Kagome off of her shoulder.

“Pointy chin.” She mumbled. “Fine. Will you be talking to him about it then?”

Kagome’s face scrunched up in dislike at the question.

“Fine. I’ll talk to him about it after we leave.” Sango pinched Kagome’s leg in retaliation and was satisfied with the squeak that she got in return.

“Ha!”

Kagome pouted.

… … …

Many hugs and wishes for safety were exchanged when they were ready to leave the little camp and go separate ways. Kagome hugged everyone twice. Even Jaken and Inuyasha.

Kagome has given the biggest bundle of berries and leaves to Rin, telling her to make sure that they ate well. She and Shippou, as children are apt, were ecstatic at the prospect of something new. Shippou was practically bouncing in his excitement to see Rin’s quarters in the Western Hall and all of the playthings that she had told him were waiting for them.

Kouga had pulled her into a tight embrace, lifting her off of her feet in the hug until she plead for want of oxygen. When he let her go, she had hugged him again, softer this time, and brushed her thumb over one of his eyebrows. They’d shared a secret smile and she told him to keep Sango safe.

Inuyasha had grumbled and wormed away from her first, hesitant, awkward hug; so of course when he turned to walk away from all of the _mushy stuff_ she had launched herself at his back and flattened him to the ground in a crushing hug. She’s whispered in his ear that everything would be okay between them with time and that it was good to be apart for a while. It had made her sore heart ache, but she had needed to say it for herself as much as she had for him. He’d nodded and sat there with his back to them all as she climbed up from the dirt and grass.

Sango and Kagome had twirled around in a small circle and promised each other that they would be safe. Ignoring Kagome’s protests and exclamations, Sango had pulled a small dagger from her own traveling pack and made Kagome take it.

Now, with the three groups having set off in their different directions, Kagome was fighting both her lack of sleep and her tears in order to cling to wakefulness.

It had been decided that Kirara would accompany Sesshomaru, Kagome and Miroku to cut down on their travel time and the chances of Kagome losing control of her powers again. And so she found herself perched behind Miroku while Sesshomaru floated along beside them. She eventually gave up and slept, leaning against Miroku’s back under Sesshomaru’s watchful eyes.

She didn’t stir when they landed to sleep in a quiet meadow for the night, only waking when the sun finally rose the next day.

… … …

Sesshomaru couldn’t decide whether Rain and Jaken’s bickering gave him a worse headache, or this.

“I am leaving. Be finished or quiet when I return with meat and wood for cooking.”

Miroku and Kagome didn’t say anything or look at him as he strode across the meadow and down the nearby hill toward a river. They were more concerned with glaring at each other.

They had agreed to start with Kagome’s instruction in meditation and had spent most of the morning in frustration. They sat cross-legged on the field, with a hand’s width of space between their knees, trying to get Kagome to understand the process.

Miroku had removed and folded his purple kesu and black monsuke,

“It wasn’t this complicated the first time!”

“I can’t do it for you every time, Kagome. That time called for some extreme measures.”

“Well, why can’t you just tell me what to do again?”

Miroku pinched the bridge of his nose and sighed.

“It doesn’t work like that, Kagome.”

“It did!”

“I know it did, but it doesn’t!”

“That makes no sense!”

He shook his head, still pinching his nose, and sighed.

“Well it doesn’t.” Kagome repeated.

She threw her arms in the air and fell onto her back, accidentally kicking Miroku as she found a comfortable place for her legs at his side.

“What I mean is that meditation won’t work the same way when you do it on your own. I wasn’t just guiding you with my words that day. I was using my own aura to calm yours and your spiritual energy.”

“There’s a difference?”

He poked at her hiking boot with the finial of his shakujo as he answered, jangling the rings.

“Of course there is. An aura is the appearance of someone’s soul that those with sacred energies- called reiki- can see.”

“Okay. So why can youkai see auras?”

“The most powerful of youkai can, but not _all_ youkai. They have their own spiritual powers; yoki-jaki. It’s not that different from humans. All humans possess some reiki but not all of them have enough to wield consciously. All youkai have some jaki but not all of them have enough to wield.”

“Okay so… it’s not my aura that flares out when I get all…” She flapped her fands around in the air avobe her face where she was still laying.

“Oh. No, it is.”

“But.”

“Your reiki and your aura both get a little out of control. From the two times that I’ve seen.”

“A little?”

Miroku smiled smacked her stomach with the staff.

“Up! We’re not done trying!”

“I’m still confused!”

“You won’t _stop_ being confused until you _get up._ ”

Kagome grudgingly sat up and arranged herself back into a cross-legged position again. She did glare at Miroku from the corner of her eye and huff at him though.

“Okay, fine. So I’ve got the breathing part.”

“Mhm.”

“And the closing my eyes part.”

“Mhm.”

“Now I’m supposed to… relax…?”

“Yes. Relax your body.”

“Okay.”

She rolled her neck and shoulders, laying her hands on her knees.

“I feel like I’m going to fall asleep.” She said after a few minutes.

“Don’t fall asleep.”

“Then what _do_ I do?”

“Feel for your power- your reiki.”

Kagome opened her eyes and bent over with her head in her arms.

“Ugggh!” She tugged at her hair. “You keep saying that!”

“Because it’s the next step!”

“I don’t know _how_ to do it.”

Miroku sighed and set his shakujo aside, reaching up to push at her shoulders.

“This isn’t going anywhere.” He pushed her back up and she dropped her hands into her lap. “Let’s start somewhere else.”

“ _Kami_ , anywhere else.”

His deep chuckle made her pout sullenly at the grass beside her, one fist pushing at the skin on her cheek.

“Just tell me what you feel when you use your reiki.”

“When I purify a shard?”

He nodded at her and smiled.

“Well… I’m not really sure. Pressure, I guess?”

“Good. That’s good. We can work with that. The pressure comes from here, right?”

He laid two fingers in the valley between her breasts.

“Uh-huh.”

“Then that’s what you need to think about.” He tapped the fingers against her chest twice and then removed them, leaning back and resuming the proper meditative posture. “Just one more time and we’ll stop until tomorrow.”

Kagome wiggled around until she mirrored Miroku.

“Okay, so breathe and relax.” She said, closing her eyes.

“Now remember that feeling and try to call it forward, try to make yourself feel it instead of just remembering it.”

Miroku’s face split in a wide grin when he saw the curling pink flows of reiki rise from all over Kagome’s skin. It was calm and slow, skimming over her like steam instead of the wild flames that he had seen before.


	16. Storms

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Posted 1.20.2020

Paradigm Shift

Chapter 16: Storms

… … …

Kagome’s training had gone easily after the initial struggle. For the most part. There had been rocky patches here and there over the next week. The biggest frustration for Kagome and Miroku was that she seemed unable to reach a full meditative state without her reiki spilling over and across her skin. Without the natural calm that came from being encased in the energy, she didn’t seem able to slow the ebb and flow of her thoughts and her emotions.

While frustrating, Miroku had told her that it wasn’t unusual. There were some people who just weren’t suited to meditation. He just hadn’t met many people who couldn’t, that also possessed the amount of reiki that she did.

Then, of course, there had been the third night of their travels, the night that a poor little rabbit had jumped out of the brush and startled Kagome during a session; which is how Sesshomaru had ended up with only one eyebrow for a few days. The youkai lord had not been terribly impressed. Somehow, his ire just wasn’t communicated as well without the eyebrow.

Kagome found it endearing that he had picked up a habit of running his fingers over the now-regrown hair whenever he thought he wasn’t being watched.

After the first week, things had settled into a routine. They would wake up and Kagome would meditate with Miroku while Sesshomaru watched on. They would eat as they flew, pushing as far as they could before nightfall when they would land to cook whatever they could hunt or forage. There was more meditating, and then sleep; with hygiene mixed in whenever they found somewhere suitable.

Neither Miroku or Sesshomaru had mentioned her refusal to go for a visit with her family when Miroku has suggested it as they had skirted around the edges of Edo’s protected land.

So it was, that nearly three weeks after the large group had split into three, Kagome, Miroku, and Sesshomaru found themselves at the base of the mountain trail that would lead them to Atsuta Shrine.

… … …

“This path will take you to the shrine. There is a split in it, nearly a day’s walk from here. You will take the western side.” Sesshomaru told them, facing the trail and gesturing as he gave Kagome and Miroku the directions.

“You won’t be accompanying us, Lord Sesshomaru?” Miroku asked.

“I shall attend to my business in the Western Hall. I will return to you both, here at the shrine when it is completed.”

The cold look in Sesshomaru’s eyes worried Kagome, but she could imagine the cause. There was still upheaval in his territory, after all. Her cheeks reddened as she realized that Sesshomaru had been kept away from his duties to watch after her for so long.

His hand rested on her cheek, drawing her out of her embarrassment as she looked into his face.

“Train well, Kagome. I expect you to learn control, and to learn it quickly. You will bring respect to my house.”

Kagome’s eyes widened at his words.

“Your house?”

“Yes. You are part of my house, of course, being under my personal protection. It is not simply the west that guards you now, I do that of my own choice.”

Miroku watched on in amusement as the taiyoukai suddenly found himself with an armful of teary miko.

Kagome didn’t know what to say to Sesshomaru. The thought that he considered her _family_ , in the same way that he had claimed Rin, floored her. So she clung to him as tears of happiness escaped her. Sesshomaru detangled her from himself and held her at arm’s length.

“This should not surprise you, Kagome.”

She just shook her head and smiled.

Sesshomaru wiped the tears from her cheeks and bent down to her ear.

“You have a bad habit of not seeing the things that are right before you.” He told her. “You should concern yourself less with trying to be what you think those around you want and look at how they already see you.”

Kagome wasn’t quite sure to make of the words, but she would think on them later. Right now he had just told her that she was important to him in a way that she didn’t realize she could be. And he was _leaving_ right after dropping that bombshell on her; going off to deal with an upheaval in his lands that could potentially be very dangerous for him.

Sesshomaru sighed at her emotional outburst over the whole thing. Being used to her open displays did not make him entirely comfortable when they happened, but he knew what to do when they were directed at him by now.

He scooped her up and let her wrap her arms around his neck as she settled down.

Kagome’s heart soared at the thought of belonging with a real family here in the past. It was so much different than the tenuous strands that had tied her to Inuyasha, Sango, and Miroku for so long. It was a promise of something that wouldn’t fall apart after the journey was over. Something she could hang on to and fight for.

Her fingers embedded themselves in his hair as she clung to him at the feeling of being there and knowing that she would have a place in the west if she chose to stay once the jewel and Naraku were gone for good.

Kagome had always wondered what would happen to her if the well closed to her after her tasks were finished. What she could have to return to if it stayed open and she wanted to travel back and forth through the times. Where she would go if she decided to stay here in the past even if the well would allow her to pass through.

Now she knew that no matter the outcome at the end, there would be someone who would welcome her. She felt like her heart would burst as the feelings coursed through her.

Miroku took a step forward as ribbons of pink reiki wrapped around Kagome and Sesshomaru. He met the surprised golden eyes of the taiyoukai, and called out as they began to tighten.

“Kagome!”

But she just pressed herself closer to Sesshomaru’s chest and neck where he held her aloft. The strands passed through her and settled into Sesshomaru’s skin, leaving behind a trail of eight-point hope stars around his covered left bicep.

Once the reiki had settled, leaving behind the unseen mark, and Sesshomaru had deposited Kagome on her feet, Miroku approached them.

“Kagome?” He reached his hand out to her, settling it on her shoulder lightly. “What was that?”

She looked at Miroku in confusion.

“I’m going to miss him. I’m not allowed to give him a hug now?”

“Not that… you didn’t use your reiki intentionally?”

She looked back and forth between Sesshomaru’s questioning eyes and Miroku’s concerned expression.

“My reiki? …no…?”

She gasped and inspected Sesshomaru, pulling down the collar of his hankimono and running her eyes over the flesh, reaching her hands up and pulling his face down to her level; lifting his hair away from his neck and ears.

Sesshomaru tugged her hand away from his hair and straightened himself up.

“If you are finished assaulting my person, I assure you that I was not harmed.”

“But…” She went back to looking between the two of them. “What…?”

“You did not intend to release your reiki, then?” Miroku asked.

“No. I…uh… I didn’t.”

“As I am unharmed and I seem to be unaffected, I suggest that we continue as planned. You may ask about the occurrence when you meet the residents of the shrine.”

Kagome and Miroku nodded at the suggestion, saying their goodbyes before watching Sesshomaru leap into the air and condense into an orb of light as he sped off deeper into the west.

“Shall we?” Miroku swept an arm toward the mountain path.

“Yeah. Yeah, let’s go.”

So they began to make their way toward Atsuta Shrine, hoping for answers.

… … …

Kagome had done her fair share of hiking and walking and running and climbing over the years, but this was killing her.

“Does it have to be uphill the _whole_ way?” She complained, grasping onto Miroku’s sleeve as she bent over to catch her breath for the dozenth time.

“That’s usually how mountains work, Kagome.” He pressed his lips together and determinedly looked away from her to keep from laughing.

“My legs are burning and my sides are cramping. Can’t we just stop for a minute?”

“You were the one who insisted on making it to the western path that Sesshomaru told us of.”

“Uggggh.”

“It’s not so bad. Look at the view.”

Miroku pointed his shakujo to their right. Which happened to be a wide view of the green hills that surrounded the mountain's base. Animals could be seen in the distance, grazing over the lush hills and valleys. Dotted, far-off villages looked serene and multitudes of fragrant, colorful flowed swept over the cliffside of the trail. The very steep, very long drop off of the trail beside them.

Kagome inched away from the cliff as she looked, backing away until she was pressed up to the wall of dirt on the other side of the path.

“Uh-huh. Yep. It’s very pretty. Why don’t you come over here, Miroku? It’s nice over here. Away from impending death.”

He did laugh, then. He went to her side though, and they kept climbing.

Eventually, they came to the split in the road.

“Ah! See. It wasn’t too far away after all.”

“It had to be over an hour.” Kagome responded as she let herself fall to the dirt, in the shade of an overhanging tree.

“No matter.” He said, walking along the stone that rose up on one side of the western path. “Look here. It’s not much but this outcropping will shield us from the worst of the rain for the night.”

A large tablet of blue-grey stone jutted out from the cliff face above a hollow crevice, tilted at an angle that should keep them dry. It would be a tight squeeze, but they could both fit into the little space if they stood with their shoulders pressed together when they sat.

“Rain?” Sure enough, when Kagome crawled out from under her tree and looked at the sky, the lack of daylight was not indicative of the approaching night, but due to the presence of dark rain clouds blotting out the sun’s rays. “Great. Rain.” She said grumpily.

Miroku handed her his Shakujo as he began lifting moderate-sized fallen rocks to place on the dirt of the crevice. She took it and watched him as he did so.

“What are you doing?” She asked.

“Well.” He lifted and carried another heavy stone. “Rain means water.”

“Okay..” It seemed pretty obvious to her.

“If we’re going to wait here during the night,” He moved a couple more stones to sit on top of his pile, these ones were smooth. “I’d rather not sit on the dirt, which will quickly turn to mud.”

“Oh! That’s a good idea.”

“All done!” Miroku exclaimed, clapping his hands together to rid them of dust.

He took his Shakujo from Kagome’s hands and they tested the stability of the makeshift seat together as the first drops of rain began to fall.

It wasn’t long before the water was coming down in sheets around them, and they soon discovered that while the overhanging slab kept them from being drenched in one direction, it was narrower than it had looked at first glance and their shoulders and sides were unprotected.

Kagome looked over her shoulder curiously as Miroku’s hands grasped her upper arms and moved her in from of himself. She instinctively leaned into him to keep the water pouring off of the overhead rock from soaking her front.

“What are you doing?”

“We will eventually have to sit down, Kagome. Unless you’ve developed a talent for sleeping while you stand?”

“No…” She drew out the word, not liking where this was going.

“Then we should sleep. It’s late and the rain isn’t showing any signs of letting up. I imagine we have a long way to go before we get to the shrine tomorrow.”

Kagome smacked repeatedly at Miroku’s hands as they moved to her hips.

“Miroku!”

And then she couldn’t keep her balance as Miroku lowered himself to the rocks, pressing his fingers harder into her hips and pulling her with him.

She landed hard in his lap and sat stiffly as he wrapped his arms around her waist.

“Is this really necessary…?”

“If you don’t want to get wet.” He told her. “Although…” His hands left her waist to creep along her folded legs.

“Miroku!” She threw her elbow into his chest.

“Ow.” The complaint was laced with silent laughter, and he stilled his hands on her knees. “Do you have to hit me all the time?”

“When you don’t keep your hands to yourself, I do!”

“Mhm.” His breath on her neck as he shook with humor made her shiver. “I’ll behave.” But his voice was deep and throaty and she could feel the sound, through his chest, on her back as he laid his forehead on the junction of her neck and shoulder.

Kagome stilled rigidly at the combination of Miroku’s words and actions. _‘No. He couldn’t.’_ She thought.

But as she thought about the little differences in his playful flirting when they stopped in villages and he would accost any pretty woman he saw, going on in his typical way. Except… remembering it now, looking back on it… she had just taken it with a grain of salt, he was just teasing, of course.

Since they had left Lord Kuranosuke’s compound… he would wink at her over another random woman’s shoulder as he would plead in false desperation for an heir. His eyes would meet hers across the distance when he gave compliments out like candy to the village women.

She could see the casual and unassuming touches on her hair or her shoulder or her foot as they practiced her meditation.

She could the hesitation and the strain in his voice when she would hug him after she had done well and received his praise.

 _‘It’s just Miroku.”_ She told herself, still locked in that unmoving stance, uncertain. _‘That’s just how … he… is…’_

**_“”_ ** _… **not seeing the things that are right before you.“”**_

**_“”… look at how they already see you.“”_ **

Kagome had brushed Sesshomaru’s words away, assuming that he was telling her she shouldn’t have been surprised that he would include her in his little family the way he had expressed.

But what if he was hinting at something else. Someone else?

“Miroku…?” Her voice was soft, low, and her uncertainty bled into her tone, questioning.

She knew that he could feel her heart speed up, and suddenly the hands that found their way to her shoulders, rubbing the tension away from her in a way that had become commonplace, suggested something more. Under the compassion, the loyalty, the playful teasing, the intensity that she had found when she finally peeled away the aloof mystery that had surrounded him; she saw that it was possible.

She wondered if she was jumping to conclusions, wondered if she was just adding meaning to all of his words and actions; meaning that couldn’t really be what she was considering.

“Hmm?” The noise of acknowledgment was unusually clear, the rain and wind and rushing of her heart were all beyond her focus now.

“…nevermind.” She couldn’t ask him if what she was thinking was true. How could it be, after all? He hadn’t changed his attitude to her in any obvious ways. She had to be reading too much into the winks and glances and touches… it was just because Sango wasn’t around right now and he only had her to tease.

He must have caught the tremor in her voice, because his hands stilled on her shoulders and then moved away, hovering at her elbows.

“Kagome?”

 _‘She knows.’_ Miroku thought, and it sent adrenaline rushing through his body.

She barely heard his whisper but she could feel his heart speed up to match her own. She cleared her throat and made a show of watching the rain fall and splash into the puddles around them.

“We… We should sleep!” She said a little too enthusiastically. She couldn’t see or feel Miroku’s jerky nod behind her, or when he leaned the back of his head against the cliff face behind them. She couldn’t tell that he swallowed heavily around the thickness in his throat, or that he closed his eyes and a pained look crossed his face.

She did see his hands tighten into fists before settling on her knees again, out of the rain. She did see the tremble in his hands that matched her own as their hearts slowed and breaths deepened as they fell asleep.


	17. Shift

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Posted 1.20.2020  
> Unedited

Paradigm Shift

Chapter Seventeen: Shift

… … …

Kagome’s world was full of the most wonderful smell. She inhaled it deeply, trying and failing to identify it. It smelled so good, though, and she was so warm and comfortable.

She snuggled down into the warm body.

_‘Wait. Body? Miroku!’_

She pried her eyes open and was met with the sight of a long, tanned neck; stretched out from where Miroku’s head was still resting against the stone behind him where he had relaxed last night.

She had apparently turned in her sleep, propped up against one of his shoulders with her side curled into him and her legs hanging over his lap. His right arm was laying over her knees with his hand hanging limply over her left thigh.

Her left arm was curled between them... and she didn’t want to think of where her right arm was… precariously situated underneath of her. Where she really needed to remove it from. Carefully. Before her forearm or elbow hit something very embarrassing.

So she shifted slowly, dragging her arm out of his lap under her, so slowly, and sagged when she had freed it. Now to escape the arm over her knees and the arm wrapped around her back, his hand tucked between her right hip and his leg.

She knew she had settled on the wrong escape strategy when she scooted down flat, intending to roll out from under his arms and then stand. She wondered if there would have been any realistic way to get away when she felt the sigh and the arm across her knees slide down her legs.

Kagome held her breath, trying not to move so that she wouldn’t rouse Miroku any further from sleep. When his breathing evened out again, she grabbed his hand and pulled it up above her abdomen, settling to flat against his own body. She rolled onto her left side, shouldering his other hand out from under her back and bracing herself on one elbow as she tried to sneak away.

She was jerked harshly away from freedom by his hand splayed over her middle, dragging her back into him.

As Miroku’s fingers found their way under the hem of her shirt and onto her sensitive waist, she blew a frustrated gust of air into Miroku’s knee.

She tried to pull away again but his hold on her was firm. His hand started to move over her side; his fingers brushing the strap of her bra under her arm, and she pushed at his wrist as she struggled to sit up.

That same firm pressure turned her onto her back in his lap and she was shocked to see his fully alert eyes on her. He wasn’t smiling or smirking or laughing.

He couldn’t. This was real, this was serious, and he knew that _she knew_ and he couldn’t stand it if she convinced herself that she was imagining it.

So he watched her as he pressed his advantage, drank in everything about her just in case she pushed him away or told him to stop. Because he wanted this. Wanted her. Wanted everything about her to stay right here in his arms and _be his_.

He wanted to know how her smile felt when it was pressed into his. Wanted her to know how it sent him into bliss when her aura touched his. Wanted to see her surrender and let him keep her.

He was ghosting his fingertips down her ribs. The light touch coupled with that look he was giving her froze her movements. She couldn’t tear her eyes from his.

His fingers kept going as he watched her. His eyes darkened, his lips parted, and a loose lock of hair fluttered in the soft breeze by his lowered head. His touch caressed its way around her navel and she clenched, making his fingers and her skin break apart for a moment before he flattened that hand against her.

He wasn’t ready to let her go yet and he was glad when she accepted his touch, pressing into her stomach to calm her, beg her not to leave yet.

His other hand came around, his bicep flexing against her neck as he bent slightly and that hand grabbed a handful of her shirt. He pulled it up, inch by inch, exposing his hand on her midsection. The sight of him touching her so intimately and the knowledge that he was being so forward; not asleep, not even close, it made her head fall back to expose her throat.

He was almost overwhelmed at the movement, at the sight of that smooth skin laid out for him. He wanted to know what it tasted like, what she would do if he slid his lips over her beautiful neck.

Her back arched minutely as the hand that had been tugging at her shirt found its way to her bare neck. The feel of its weight there and the contrast of his heat and the cool air made her gasp.

He groaned at the sound of her gasp, feeling his eyes dilate as he took in every second of this. He might never get to have her like this again, heaving and accepting and just feeling his touch.

He scraped his short nails lightly over her throat and hooked his fingertips into the waistband of her jeans, tugging them away from her skin gently as he moved his knuckles over her from one side to the other and back again. She was very aware of how close the tips of his fingers were to the elastic band that held her undergarments in place.

Never once breaking eye contact with her, he brought that maddening, wonderful, right hand to her face, rubbing his fingers over her lips.

He knew that he needed to let her mind catch up to her body. He needed to let her make her choices and decisions without him leading her into the oblivion that could come with pleasure.

“Good morning, Kagome.” His voice was impossibly deep and rough, thick with his obvious arousal at her reactions. Knowing that she had seen his intent. Knowing that she hadn’t pushed him away. Feeling how she had responded to him.

Disappointment ran through him as she took the opportunity to sit up and climb from his lap, stealing the heat of her away from him. He let her go, rubbing his palms frantically against the fabric over his own legs.

Kagome stood there, just a few steps away with her back to him. Her nails found their way to the outside seams of her jeans and picked at them as she tried desperately to form a thought. She was consumed by that heat that she had felt only a few times. It pooled in her and she squeezed her thighs together; the pants were suddenly too tight and her underwear were uncomfortable and sodden with that heat.

So maybe she had been right. He had just shown her exactly how interested he really was.

She tried and failed to force down her soft moan as she felt Miroku’s hands find their way between her elbows and sides, pushing her backward but not forcing her to move; just asking if she would. She took that step back and into his embrace voluntarily.

“Are you alright, Kagome?”

She definitely noticed that he wasn’t apologizing or offering platitudes and excuses for his behavior. When she closed her eyes again, his own swam before her; burned into her memory. Inescapable.

She smoothed her shaking hands over the arms around her and nodded slowly.

Then his lips were on her neck in a gentle kiss and his breath was on her ear and then his hair was against her cheek as he leaned around her. There was another gentle kiss at the corner of her mouth and that deep, rough voice so close to her.

“Good girl.” And caught up in the rush that went through her with those two words, words that he had used before and in such a different way, she almost lost herself.

But he was pulling away from her, his arms and hands barely lingering as he did.

When she turned, incredulous, he had retrieved his shakujo and slung her much depleted lavender bag over his shoulder, walking away from her; down the western trail that was supposed to carry them to Atsuta Shrine.

Kagome stood there for a while. Stood there until it registered in her mind that he was far enough down the path that he was going to be out of her sight when he rounded the curve ahead. She jogged across the distance to his side, still not able to really hold on to any one thought, and stared at the side of his face.

She tucked her hair behind her ears and felt them redden as she blushed, but she looked ahead as well and they walked.

… … …

The heated encounter wasn’t mentioned as they made their way to the shrine. Eventually, Kagome relaxed and was asking Miroku questions about what reiki training consisted of.

“I’m not entirely sure what you’ll be doing to train. My own training was scattered and unconventional.”

“What do you mean?”

He smiled at her with a far-off look on his face as he took her hand to help her step over a trickle of running water. If their hands lingered for a little while longer than was strictly needed, then they didn’t mention it.

“When I was seven, my father took me to the place that he trained as a child. My grandfather had taken him at the same age. It’s important for the men in my line to learn reiki control early.”

“Because of the curse?”

Miroku’s hand tightened around his staff and he nodded tightly.

“Yes. We traveled into China, to a shaolin temple. There, I learned the basics of reiki awareness and manipulation. I also learned how to fight; obviously something that I would need in my family’s search for Naraku.”

He grimaced at the dirt path before continuing.

“It was never my intent or my father’s intent for me to become emersed in the shaolin lifestyle or beliefs. I wasn’t tempted by it anyway. My family has been Soto-Zen for as far back as we can trace, and our temple has been passed down through the generations. I never could bring myself to give up the shaolin training pants.”

She laughed and blushed at the winning smile and waggling eyebrows he directed at her as he stuck one leg out from under his robes.

“They do look like they’d be more comfortable for constant travel than…well… nothing.” Kagome agreed.

“Oh, they are. These used to be black, I’ll have you know.”

Kagome eyed the grey fabric.

“How long have you had those!?”

“Since I finished my training in China and came back home. I was fifteen when we returned to our temple here in Japan, and sixteen when my father was taken by the curse.”

Kagome was brought up short when it came to her that she didn’t know how old Miroku was. She stopped in the middle of the widening trail, staring at his back with her head tilted to the side. She wracked her brian, trying to remember any time that the subject might have come up, but she couldn’t think of a single instance. She didn’t even know when his birthday was!

“Miroku!”

He startled and turned, fixing her with his wide violet eyes.

“Yes?”

“How old are you!?!”

He laughed as he turned back around and waved her forward again. Once they were side-by-side again, and walking together, he put his arm around Kagome’s shoulders and drew her into his side.

“It had been two years since my father’s death when we met.”

Kagome did the math in her head. So he was twenty-one. That wasn’t so bad, just three years older than her. Maybe three and a half.”

She ducked under his arm and smacked his shoulder as he laughed at her. Well, that was her intention. He had caught her hand and kissed it before letting it go when she had tried.

Miroku smirked at her blush as she spluttered, clasping her hands behind her back and rubbing the spot he had kissed with her thumb. She smiled, and it was because they could see the torii gate that marked the entrance to the shrine as they came around the last curve of the trail.

That’s why she was smiling. Not at all because her hand tingled and her breath caught where he had teasingly kissed her hand and brought back memories of that morning.

“So… when’s your birthday!?”

“Not far away, actually. Midsummer, just after Sanno in Edo.”

“Oh! But that means you’ll be here at Atsuta for your birthday. I’m sorry you’ll have to miss the festival for me.”

Miroku never got a chance to reply to her, though. As he opened his mouth, he found a knife under his chin. He could see Kagome in a similar predicament to his side. He held up his hands, one flat and the other holding his shakujo as always, seeing Kagome follow his lead.

The two youkai that held them immobile were female, Kagome and Miroku eyed the crescent moon marking on their wrists as the dark-haired one with Miroku spoke.

“What business does a soto-zen monk have at Atsuta Shrine?”

“And what exactly are _you_?” The red-haired one with Kagome added.

“Ah.” Miroku laughed nervously until the knife pressed closer to his throat. It wasn’t lost on him that the last time he had been at the point of a blade, it had been Sesshomaru holding the weapon; and now here he was again, with youkai that bore his crest. “Lord Sesshomaru sent us here.” He faltered as he heard the low growl behind him. “For Kagome.” His staff pointed to Kagome. “For training.”

“This one does have Lord Sesshomaru’s scent on her.” The red-haired youkai said.

Miroku and Kagome were released.

“What sort of training has he sent you for?”

“Reiki control and manipulation.” Miroku spoke.

The youkai glared at him and turned back to Kagome.

“Uhm. Yeah… he needs me to learn to control my reiki, like Miroku said.”

“We can sense the reiki in you, and yet your dress does not indicate your station.”

Kagome tried to stand as still as possible when the two youkai approached her and began sniffing at her clothing. _‘They must be inuyoukai, like Sesshomaru.’_ She though awkwardly.

“And this soto-zen is your mate? His scent is even more heavily on you than our Lord’s.”

Miroku held his breath to repress the laughter trying to claw its way from him at the wide-eyes look and embarrassment written all over Kagome. 

“No! I mean.. no, we travel together. With Lord Sesshomaru.”

The inuyoukai gave each other a significant look as they turned to the torii and waved Miroku and Kagome on to enter the grounds.

“Scandalous.” One of them said.

Kagome’s blush deepened and Miroku finally laughed into his sleeve.

They were lead over the grounds of the shrine, past the gardens and other structures, and into the haiden.

… … …

Kagome had been shuffled into a room and away from Miroku once they had passed through the haiden’s main hall and into the living quarters of the residents. Peroid-appropriate hakama and haiori, matching the attire of their inuyoukai escorts, were thrust at her and she was ordered to change.

She took a moment in the small room to herself, trying to shake off some of her nervous energy.

The fine silk of the clothing surprised her. She was used to seeing Kaede’s miko attire, which was made from rough cotton. This bore the same design that Sesshomaru’s hankimono did, It was red with the pattern of flowers in white around the neck, sleeves, and ankles.

She stubbornly refused to part with her undergarments as she changed.

When she finished, she bundled up her shirt and jeans, cradling them under her arm and holding onto her boots as she slid the screen to the side and left the room.

She was brought into yet another room and hastily made her way to sit by Miroku, across from a slender woman with greying hair.

“So Tatsuo and Seijun tell me that you have been sent here by Lord Sesshomaru for training. We have no miko amongst us, but we are competent enough to instruct you.”

The tension between the three of that made it obvious that this was a formal setting, so Kagome was determined to show respect as she spoke.

“Thank you. I want to make Lord Sesshomaru proud.”

The woman’s eyes narrowed at Kagome and she went over her words in her mind, looking for anything she could have said to upset her.

“For Lord Sesshomaru? For him and not simply for The West?”

“Oh! Yes, of course.”

“There is no _of course_ about it, girl. If you claim loyalty to Lord Sesshomaru, himself, than much more will be expected of you. Does he give you this right?”

Kagome nodded, choosing not to dig herself any deeper by speaking again.

“Then you shall begin tomorrow morning. I am Nozomi. I keep and tend to the grounds and the shrine’s buildings. I also bring news of the happenings, here at Atsuta Shrine and on its lands, to Lord Sesshomaru, myself. Know that I will be watching your progress and telling him of it while you are here.”

With that, Nozomi stood and walked from the room, leaving them alone, but not before Kagome caught sight of a gray tail that trailed behind her. She turned to Miroku.

“Are they all youkai?”

“It would appear so. I was shown to the room that we will be sharing in the living quarters, and around the gardens where _we_ will be training before they brought me here to meet Nozomi and wait for you. If there are other humans around, I haven’t seen them yet.”

“Where **_we_** will be training?”

Miroku gave an exasperated sigh.

“If I’m not training while I’m here with you, they consider me useless and I won’t be permitted to stay while you learn.”

“Oh. Sorry.”

He placed his hand on top of hers on the table.

“There is no place that I would enjoy being more than here with you, Kagome.”

He stood and held out his hand to her.

“I’m sure that they expect us to make our way to our room on our own, since they’ve already shown me where it is.” He said.

One room. Kagome tried not to think of what had happened between them that morning. Or what _could_ happen with them sharing a room. She hoped that there were separate futon rolls for them, at least.

Unfortunately for Kagome, she realized that while there were indeed two separate futon rolls, the size of the room did nothing to abate her nervousness. She was sure that if she laid on her back on the square floor and stretched her arms above her head, she would almost be able to touch the walls in either direction.

She did her best to appease her own modesty as Miroku stripped down to his shaolin pants and juban. She laid down on her futon with her head propped up on her folded modern clothing and inspecting the paneling of the walls. She had to look at him when his black monsuke settled around her. It was still warm and the smell of him invaded her world as she pulled it up to her neck.

“No _sheets_ tonight.” He told her, mischief in his eyes. “They’ve taken your bag to a storage room somewhere. I’m sure that you can retrieve whatever you need from it tomorrow.”

Kagome rolled over to face him as he laid across from her, covered in his purple kesu.

“Thank you.” She whispered.

Miroku reached over the empty space between their mats and ran his index finger over her cheek.

“No need to be nervous, Kagome. I won’t attack you in your sleep.”

That intense, serious look was back. This was so different from what she was used to between them and she wasn’t sure how to act.

“Do…” She broke the eye contact and covered her head in his monsuke. “Should we… talk about it?” She asked. She felt a little silly and a little cowardly hiding _under his clothes no less_ but she couldn’t push the question out with him looking at her _like that_.

“It?” He snorted at the sight of her head bobbing beneath the heavy black fabric and scooted closer to tug it down, uncovering her red face. “ _It_?” He repeated.

She stared up at the ceiling in refusal to resume that intense eye contact, and nodded again.

“You mean this morning when we woke up?” He asked, turning her head to where he was leaned on one hand _far too close to her_ with his legs spread out in front of him. “You mean this?” And his top half was braced on his forearms above her, his hair hanging around his face, _that look_ making her unable to move; unable to so much as blink.

She could feel his chest pressing into her, feel his heat, feel his right hip on top of her left as he twisted half of his body to cover her, could feel her hands on his shoulders even though she couldn’t remember putting them there.

“I don’t know.” She told him. He smiled and moved away, laying back down and covering up again on his own futon, closing his eyes.

“That’s okay too.” He replied

Kagome turned back to the wall, confused and out of her depth as she tried to sleep. She could feel his eyes on her back, but she couldn’t quite connect this Miroku and his advances to her friend Miroku and his playful but meaningless flirtations.

Just when she had finally broken away from Inuyasha, just when she had finally gotten Kouga to understand that she needed his friendship, but not his romantic gestures.

Miroku was supposed to be safe. Obnoxious, but safe. Steady and stable and not making her feel these things.

But she did sleep, eventually, torn between anticipation of beginning her training in the morning and remembrance of what his touch had done to her.


	18. Learning

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Posted 1.21.2020  
> Unedited

Paradigm Shift

Chapter Eighteen: Learning

… … …

The daylight that was streaming into the room was incongruous. It seemed wrong, somehow. Dark waves of hair spilled across a colorful woven rug, and that seemed wrong too. So out of place. It didn’t fit with the insanity, the darkness of the man.

 _‘It could be so easy.’_ Kagura thought. _‘So easy to just kill him right there while he’s asleep.’_ But she knew she was lying to herself. So she stood at the open window, longing to feel a breeze or a gust of air on her face. It seemed that she wasn’t even to be granted that simple pleasure.

“How traitorous your thoughts must be, Kagura, for your emotions to wake me.”

Naraku smiled and it made her skin crawl. That was wrong too.

“How could I betray you while you hold my heart in collateral for my obedience?”

Naraku pushed himself from the floor, coming to stand behind his incarnation.

“You forget that you are born of me, Kagura. I know how you think.” He ran his hand over the side of her neck as he looked out the window from over her shoulder. “I know how you feel, how you long for your independence, how ruthless you can be in your pursuit of what you want. I know because _you are me_.”

His words were a burning venom in her bloodstream, eating away at her from inside.

“Then it’s fitting that I hate myself as much as I hate you.” She spat from between clenched teeth, pulling roughly away from his touch. He laughed at her and it made the hair on her neck and arm stand on end.

“Go. Bring Kanna. I wish to see what Inuyasha and his little company are up to. They have been too quiet lately and I want to know what they do about this _new development_.”

Kagura smiled, then. Facing away from him so that he didn’t see. She was glad that all of his work and all of his plots and all of his manipulations were for nothing, now. How the mighty fall. Naraku was no stronger than herself without his precious Shikon. If not for his possession of her heart, literally holding her life in the palm of his hand, she could have been rid of him already. It would have been the perfect opportunity.

She did as she was told, though, crossing the room to the door to retrieve her sister. When she opened the door to see Kanna’s stoic face looking past her to Naraku, she wasn’t surprised. The pale girl always had an uncanny way of knowing things.

Kagura stepped aside from the frame of the door, letting Kanna pass and make her way to Naraku’s side.

“Ah, Kanna.” Kagura didn’t understand how Kanna could stand there unaffected when Naraku’s hand cupped her face and brought her eyes to his. Kanna didn’t respond to much, though.

“I want you to go to Inuyasha. Do not be seen. Show me what he and his companions are up to.

Kanna turned glided out of the room in silence to attend to her task.

… … …

“NO!”

Kagome winced as Tatsuo’s plain wooden staff connected with her shoulder. The inuyoukai’s red hair bristled as she swung around to point the staff at Miroku.

“I blame you for this! All wrong! All wrong!” She turned back and closed the distance between herself and Kagome. “How will you ever be of use in battle if you have to _sit and meditate_ to call up your energy!? No!”

Tatsuo’s claws dug painfully into Kagome’s skin as she adjusted her stance.

Kagome pressed her lips together, figuring that it wouldn’t go over well if she suggested that Sesshomaru had been the one to suggest meditation in the first place.

“Like this!” Kagome’s left arm was pulled straight out, her hand smacked until she had her palm facing flat out, parallel to her body. Her right arm was bent in from of her chest, palm down, facing the ground.

“Oof” Kagome grunted as the air was knocked from her when Tatsuo hit her chest roughly.

“Your reiki does not come only from here! That is just the most concentrated well of reiki in you. You must _direct_ it. Not just let it run uselessly over your skin.”

Tatsuo threw another glare back to Miroku, where he was working through a series of martial arts exercises under the watchful eye of a bulky male bear youkai. He was sweaty and red from exertion and very distracting.

“Focus!” Tatsuo yelled in her face. “Reiki and jaki are not some physical or tangible _things_ that you need to _feel_ to call on! That way of thinking will only hold you back!” The red-haired woman sighed and took a deep breath before continuing, standing beside Kagome in the same stance.

“Your reiki is **_energy_**. It is always within you. Within all parts of you. All you need to do is tell it to rise from where it rests where you want to use it. You do not need to drag it from your center and _push it around._ You waste your reserves and make it too complicated.”

Kagome nodded at Tatsuo, concentrating on the words.

“Open your eyes! This is not that silly meditation.”

Kagome frowned at that, she _liked_ the meditation. It was calm and relaxing.

“How can you use your reiki to fight if you always have your eyes closed? Feel your stance. Feel your body. Feel your reiki coursing through you; like a river. It runs through all parts of your body.”

Kagome tried to do as she was told, having to fight the strong urge to close her eyes again. The mention of a river helped, and she imagined the feeling of her energy in her chest spreading out through her veins.

“Once you feel it pouring through you, simply extend it. Call it out where you want it to surface. In this case, your palms. Expand the path that it travels naturally to reach beyond your skin. It is _your_ reiki. You are not _its_ body. It does not possess you, you possess it. It does not control you, you control it.”

Red sparks of jaki crawled along Tatsuo’s palms and fingers, thickening around the backs of her hands and crawling up her forearms to her elbows.

“Now you.”

She watched Kagome’s arms.

Nothing happened as Kagome’s face scrunched up in concentration.

“No! You concentrate too much. You concentrate too little. You have to balance it if you want to learn battle reiki! And you must if Lord Sesshomaru wishes it!” Tatsuo’s silvery-blue eyes landed on Miroku again and she growled. She stomped over to where the burly bear youkai was watching Miroku go through the forms.

“Heiji! I’m taking him!”

The man laughed and waved his arm as Miroku with in amusement in his brown eyes at the fiery woman’s disposition.

“We are nearly finished anyway.” He told her. He outright laughed when she began hitting Miroku repeatedly with her quarterstaff, growling in frustration.

“Where did you train!? Tell me so that I can make sure never to send anyone to train there!” Her staff laned with an audible thus on his thigh. “Do you even use your own reiki in battle!? This _useless_ ,-”

Miroku covered his head with his arms.

“Hey! Ow!”

“-self-expressionist,-”

“Hey! Stop it!”

“-meditative, _useless_ channeling!”

Tatsuo grabbed Miroku’s wrist and stalked with him in tow over to Kagome and shoved him to stand by Kagome’s right side, taking back up her post at Kagome’s left side.

“Now! You too! Stances!” She bit out at them.

They both sighed in resignation and bent their knees, moving their arms into place.

“Like a river. Tell your reiki to spill out and over the bank of its natural course. No! Stupid man.”

Tatsuo reached around Kagome’s front and smacked Miroku as his reiki crawled over his whole body in slow blue flames.

“Control it. Direct it. Only your hands! Stop! Eyes open. You cannot block out sounds and distractions. You cannot focus on sounds and distractions. You have to accept the world around you, be part of it, be in it, be aware and observe, allowing the unimportant things to pass through you. Aware and observant, but not filled with the need to pay attention to everything. When you face a foe you need to see your surroundings and know how to use them, but they do not need to take all of your attention.”

The red sparks lit along Tatsuo’s hands and forearms again.

“Eyes open, soto-zen!” She scolded. “Do not roll them at me! I’ll come smack them right out of your empty head!”

Kagome and Miroku’s eyes met out of the corners of their eyes, conveying their mutual exasperation.

Tatsuo dropped her hands and moved to stand in front of them both. She stomped one foot in the dirt and balled her hands into fists as their reiki moved across their whole bodies again.

“No! _No_ no **_no!_** ” She pushed beat at their arms with her staff, making them each take a step back and break their stances while she growled at them again. “Give me your hands.”

They both held out their hands to her. She grasped Kagome’s right wrist and Miroku’s left, bringing them close together so that the sides of their hands touched. Her hand hovered over theirs and her jaki sparked in her palm in the space between.

“Now feel.” She slapped her hand down onto their palms. They both jumped slightly and pulled their hands away, shaking them out. “Do you feel where my jaki touches your reiki? Where it shocks you _inside_ your hands?”

“Yes.” They chorused.

“Good. Only there where you feel it. Where my jaki sits on your skin still. Stances!” She resumed her place by Kagome and they all resumed the posture. “Tell your reiki to cleanse the jaki from your body. Only to cleanse the jaki.”

Miroku got it first, the tiny blue flames licking over his hand and wrist. Kagome smiled at him and watched the reiki dance on his skin.

“Yes! Good! Now you, miko. Ah! Eyes _open!_ ”

Kagome stared at her palm intently, doing her best to allow the rest of the reiki’s flow through her undisturbed, letting herself feel the tingle of Tatsuo’s energy in her palm. She took a deep breath and as she exhaled, she pulled on the desire that she had to _get it right_ , to nullify the jaki in her hand.

The recognizable wisps of pink steam rose up in the center of her palm, right in the spot that the red spark had touched her. She smiled at Tatsuo and Miroku, not realizing how her aura filled her eyes and turned them a clear, bright amethyst.

“Very good, Kagome. Very good control, too. Just in the spot where my jaki was.” She made shooing noises, smacking their thighs with her staff lightly. “Go now. We are done for today. Practice that and we will continue tomorrow.”

Heiji meandered over to Tatsuo’s side as they watched Miroku and Kagome head towards the bath house to wash away the sweat of their exertions for the day.

“You see it too.” Heiji’s deep voice said.

“I do.” Tatsuo agreed. “They could be powerful together.”

“They are already powerful on their own.”

“Yes. If they blend, though… they could make a formidable asset to the west and to Lord Sesshomaru.”

“Oh, I’m sure he knows already. Lord Sesshomaru doesn't miss much. I wouldn’t be surprised if he was encouraging it.”

Tatsuo chuckled and glanced at Heiji before watching Kagome and Miroku as they talked, seeing their smiles for each other as they rounded the side of the haiden, moving out of their sight toward the bath house in the back.

… … …

The bath house was large, Wide and white, arguably a pool more than anything else. If someone were so inclined, they could swim along the perimeter. There was a stone wall jutting up in the middle of the bath, dividing it into two halves. It was tall enough to cover someone’s body if they stood against it, but low enough that they could see over it from the neck up.

If they were as short as Kagome, at least. Sango might have to crouch down to preserve her modesty if she were there.

The wall didn’t reach all the way to the edges of the pool, there were open spaces on each side that would allow someone to swim, if they didn’t mind hitting their knees on the bottom- under the waist deep water, or walk to the other side.

Kagome turned her back and made Miroku get into the cool water first, waiting to hear the tell-tale splash, and making him promise that his back was to the dividing wall before she stripped to get into the other side of the water, settling her back against the stone opposite of him.

The water was relaxing, despite it being unheated, and she heard her sigh of contentment echoed from Miroku through the acoustic room.

“Tatsuo is a slave driver.” Kagome groaned.

“At least you don’t have to do the physical training that Heiji is putting me through. I shouldn’t have mentioned my martial arts history when they asked me about my previous training.”

“She has me do some physical stuff.”

Kagome rolled her eyes at Miroku’s snort.

“Not even close to the same thing.”

“Yeah, but still. My whole body is sore.” She grumbled.

“I could-

“Don’t even start!” Kagome interrupted him. She could _hear_ the mirth on his face. She giggled and sunk down to her chin in the water, remembering Tatsuo’s temper and how she had attacked Miroku.

“Tatsuo really doesn’t like you.”

“Yes, I’m baffled by it.” He ignored her giggles. “My charm has failed me. I must be losing my touch. How tragic for me.”

Miroku swished the water around and splashed it up onto his chest, rinsing the sweat from his skin with a smile.

“Maybe she’s just immune.”

“Ah, well. I find that I don’t mind so much anymore.”

Kagome heard the implications in that statement and felt herself flush as she scrubbed her shampoo into her hair. She ducked under the water to rinse it and grabbed the floating plastic bottle, tossing it over the wall onto his side.

“What happened to living in the moment and enjoying what you can while you can?” She asked him as she heard him move through the water to retrieve the bottle.

“Thank you.” He said, pouring some of the soap into his hand and rubbing it into his chest where he stood with his back to the wall. “What makes you think that I’m not doing those things?”

When Miroku heard the water moving, he chanced a glance behind him. He barely registered the half-a-second view of the expanse of her back, shoulder, bottom, legs, as she wrapped the white cotton yukata around her, silk clothes in her hand. Because the door was closing and she wouldn’t meet his eyes. Because it was possible that he had seen tears on her face.

He turned back around slowly, frowning, his light playful mood overtaken by something painful.

He was quick and efficient as he finished washing. He gathered his own clothing as he donned the same with cotton yukata.

The door closed behind him too. He followed, knowing that she would have to go to their room for fresh clothes. He wasn’t ready to just let her walk away like that. He couldn’t force her to come to him so he would make sure that she knew that he was serious. Make sure that she knew she was wanted. In every way. She would learn that he really could see past the physical. He would show her, teach her, let her learn how beautiful her soul was.

He would let her learn that he wasn’t someone who gave up.


	19. Align

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> AN: Sooo, it should be pretty apparent by now what the end pairing for Paradigm Shift is. While Sesshomaru/Kagome is my all time favorite pairing for fics, like I’ve said; this sort of ran away from me. In all honesty, I’ve been pretty nervous about how it’s going to be taken when the ball dropped and everyone realized the pairing. I know it’s not a popular one. Maybe that’s why Paradigm Shift fell into my head in the first place, dunno.
> 
> The big question for me now is whether or not to post the pairing at the beginning of the story or not. I’ve been reading/writing fanfiction since 2001 and I know that sometimes it’s ruined the anticipation for me, knowing that they would be together in the end.
> 
> Thoughts, suggestions on the dilemma?
> 
> Also, if anyone is curious, a google image search for ‘hopemore eight point star’ will bring up the one that I had in mind for Kouga’s and Sesshomaru’s marks.  
> ...  
> Posted 1.23.2020

Paradigm Shift

Chapter Nineteen: Align

… … …

It felt like the whole world was turning in slow motion for Kagome as she made her way back to her room at Atsuta Shrine. _Their room_. Going through the motions of pulling her thin cotton pajamas from her bag in the corner and dressing herself felt robotic, and her mind was just _blank_. Too many nights of too little sleep and too many days of too much _different_ that brought too much emotional upheaval had been catching up to her for too long and she lowered herself to the floor, cross-legged on her futon, and traced the little pink stars on her blue pajama pants with her index finger.

Her eyes focused back on reality again as they skimmed unseeingly over the other side of the room and fell on the neatly folded kesu and monsuke sitting on top of Miroku’s, _her **friend’s**_ , futon. Her brow crinkled as she looked at it and she moved into a kneel, stretching her arm out over the mat and picking up the clothing.

Kneeling there, with his robes sitting on her thighs, she pinched the fabric between her fingers; just feeling it and her confusion. It was something so uniquely _him_ and she felt torn between crying and laughing as memories of the last two… almost three years went fleetingly through her mind. She let her thoughts wander as the memories came and went, not really paying attention to any of them for more than a second.

She just felt. Her vision was consumed in nothing except that purple fabric, eyes once again unfocused as she concentrated inward. There was safety, companionship, friendship, annoyance, laughter, and just so many other things that all coalesce into what was between them.

The memories slowed as she let her emotions wash over her. She had formed a unique relationship with all of her friends. Each one different and each one unerringly perfect to her. Unwavering.

But now this one was wavering. Changing.

There were so many unknowns surrounding her right now.

When a hand settled onto the back of her head she was startled out of her internal musings; clutching the bundle of robes to her chest with one hand as she scrambled away from the source with a shriek of surprise. She was on her feet before she realized, with her back to the wall, looking at Miroku who was bent over her previous post with a hand hovering midair.

“Don’t **_do_** that!” Kagome said furiously, pointing at him with her free hand.

“Apologies.” Miroku straightened and strode over to her, slowly moving his hand to run over the folds of cloth that she had pinned to her chest. “Are you holding my robes hostage?”

“Oh! Oh. No. Here.” Kagome thrust the bundle into his chest with a glowing blush spreading over her nose and cheeks. Miroku didn’t take them. He just laid his hand on the underside of her rigid forearm and gave her that same serious, penetrating look that terrified her.

“What were you doing?” He asked.

Kagome was silent for a long time as she tried to figure out how to explain what exactly she had been experiencing as she had sat there. As she tried to figure out whether or not she _wanted_ to explain. She felt vulnerable and exposed in her thin, colorful, nighttime attire. Exposed and vulnerable and far too comfortable with his hand there on the sensitive skin on the underside of her arm.

“Remembering.” She finally whispered, looking out through the small window and into the sunset rather than his face. His hand stilled.

“Remembering?”

Kagome nodded to him slowly.

“Remembering. And…” Her forehead crinkled as she thought. “And feeling, I guess.”

“Remembering what?”

“Everything. Every _one_.”

“How so?”

Kagome’s eyes unfocused again, her head tilting to the side as she kept her unseeing gaze on the reds and oranges outside the window.

“Just thinking.” She told him.

“Thinking and feeling and remembering?” Miroku’s voice held a tinge of amusement now as he repeated her words. “That doesn’t make much sense, you know.”

“I know. It’s hard to explain.”

Miroku’s hand traveled down her arm to her wrist, gripping it tightly as his other hand covered hers where his robes were still being pressed into his chest.

“Everything and everyone made you need to confiscate my clothes?”

Kagome’s eyes snapped to the incriminating fabric and then up to his face where their eyes finally met.

“Well…no…”

“No?”

“No…”

When she tried to break the contact, Miroku’s face came closer and moved with hers, keeping their eyes locked together.

“I was… Well. I.” A warm gust of air left Kagome as she struggled against both his inquiry and herself; her embarrassment at being found in such a situation and her hesitancy to admit where most of her attention had been focused as she thought.

“Hm?”

“Well... I was mostly thinking about..” It caught in her throat and refused to come out, though. Her teeth came together with an audible click, still looking into Miroku’s eyes.

“About me?” He asked.

A flood of adrenaline and nervous energy filled Kagome’s body at the question and she was finally able to break the intense eye connection as her eyes pressed tightly together.

“About me?” He repeated the question, quieter, maybe closer but she couldn’t tell because her eyes were still closed. She gave the tiniest nod and it made her overtaxed heart speed up impossibly for the thousandth time since her world had turned on its head.

The back of Kagome’s head hit the wood behind her in defeat as she felt Miroku’s fingers slide under hers and slowly pull the robes out from between her hand and his chest. She dropped her arm as her hand emptied, feeling his warmth slide away from her skin as she did, and she tugged at the bottom hem of her shirt.

“Please look at me, Kagome.”

Her head shook rapidly and she pushed up on the balls of her feet, tilting her head further back and way from Miroku, pressing her back and shoulders into the wood of the wall as if it would suddenly come alive and engulf her and hide her away from this. This powerful, piercing, fervent, excruciating, impassioned, vivid, new reality that had crashed around her so subtly and so suddenly. It didn’t make sense. It had happened so fast and so low and _that_ didn’t make sense.

But she was stilled by the feel of fingers on her cheek, and she did open her eyes. She opened hers and saw his and was lost in this new _everything_ again and she whimpered as she was thrown back into the crashing seas of turmoil that she was trying so hard to escape from.

She lowered herself off of her toes and back onto the soles of her feet, a desperate laugh escaping her at the thought that even though she had found her footing here on the floor of this room, she didn’t think she could find her footing anywhere else.

And yet, against this current of confusion and contorting perceptions of reality, Kagome pressed her cheek into Miroku’s palm and fought to keep her fluttering lashes from closing and fought to wipe the pained smile from her face and wished that something would loosen this steel band that was squeezing her heart.

His thumb traced her cheekbone and she turned her face into him, her lips igniting as they barely touched his open hand with her heavy sigh.

“Why did you leave?” Kagome almost didn’t hear him, lost as she was in the storm. She stared down the length of his wrist, his ar, and finally met those violet eyes once more. “Why did you leave, Kagome?” She could hear the strain in his voice as his face moved just a little bit closer.

“Leave?” Her blue eyes flicked back and forth, trying to grasp onto his train of thought. She registered the kesu and monsuke fall in a messy pile from his other hand. “I haven’t- Oh!” The contact between her face and his hand broke as she stepped toward Miroku and laid her hand on him, the coolness of the white cotton yukata cooling her heated skin. “The bath house! I-” Her other hand came up to rest next to its twin. “That’s hard to explain too.”

“Try?”

“Its just… its just _so much._ ”

The feel of her lips on his hand had been torture enough, but this combination of her hands on his chest and her wild eyes and the closeness of her from that step she had taken forward, it was making Miroku feel like his heart was trying to escape his body; just to be with her.

“Everything’s changed and everyone’s changing and now you’re changing too and it’s all just _so much_.” She said in a rush. She felt the brush of his arms as they came to rest on the wall to either side of her ribs.

“I’m still the same as I ever was, Kagome. I just want you to see more of who I am now. I want to see more of who you are now. We _have_ seen more of each other, now.”

“More _what_ , Miroku? _More what_!?” Her voice broke at the last word, echoing her feeling that her whole world was breaking… had been breaking since the jewel broke… since her heart broke.

“More of what’s in our hearts, Kagome. What we do and don’t share with the rest of the world. More of the parts of the soul and the things that we can’t explain and more of _everything._ ”

“My heart is already broken, Miroku.”

Kagome watched his eyes and face soften. Watched him come closer and consume everything and it hurt her eyes to stare into his, co close, as his forehead touched hers but neither one of them wanted to lose the eye contact anymore.

“Kagome… I’ll tell you one of the beautiful secrets of the world.” Her hands clenched in the fabric they touched. “Hearts don’t break. They hurt, but they don’t break. They hurt so much that you feel shattered, but they don’t really break. It’s impossible. If they broke then there would be nowhere for _you_ to be. Your memories and feelings and everything and everyone and your wants and your desires and your needs would have nowhere to live. So, you see, your heart hurts right now, but it’s not broken.”

Hearing her earlier words spun around in his voice just then stunned her.

Struck her somewhere deep in her soul. In her heart.

And she knew he was right.

She shifted.

And that realization fell into place.

And it clicked.

And the world stopped spinning and changing and it righted itself.

Kagome felt like she had finally touched her feet to the ground after spending too long hanging from the ceiling. It was disorienting but _right_. It was _different_ but _better_. **_And she had survived it_**.

And _he_ had shown her how.

“How do I make it stop hurting, then?”

“Just like any other wound, Kagome. You show everything to someone else and let them help you.”

“Everything?” She whispered the question as she tilted her face to his; touching the tip of her nose to his.

“Everything.” A rush of cold air hit them both as Miroku took a step backward, putting space between them.

Kagome felt a sense of loss as she felt his arms withdraw from her sides and his forehead leave hers and his body move from hers. Then he was moving the other foot backward, was going to take another step away from her, and she cursed herself for making him feel like he pushed her too much, too hard.

So she twisted his yukata in her fists and made him stay still. He was the epitome of shocked at her forceful action, watching her, searching for some sort of answer or hint that would clue him in to what she was thinking.

“Everything?” She whispered again.

Miroku opened his mouth to reassure her again. To let her know that he wanted to be that for her, to have that from her, but when he felt her hands flatten again and start to _move_ … he knew that she understood. He hoped. For everything.

Something passed between them through their locked eyes. It wasn’t words or thoughts, but something made of just pure emotion. Something that can’t be communicated normally. It was lowered lids and parted lips and breath hitched.

“Please” She said.

“Please?”

“Please… don’t move.”

Then he felt her hands shyly, slowly sliding so intimately across his chest. Something between a moan of pleasure and a groan of frustration left him as his head fell forward, his eyes fell closed and he did his best to do as she asked.

His breath felt more like steam than air as his lungs emptied when her thumbs hooked in the collar of the after-bath attire he still wore, because they didn’t stop and she was easing the fabric open where it met; excruciatingly slow.

Exposing his chest to her in the smallest amounts.

“ _Nnnghhh. Kagome…_ ”

“Don’t move. Please.” She repeated.

Her palms were fully rested against his skin now. Softer than silk and hotter than fire and sliding under the cloth and across his shoulders.

“ _Kagome. What…”_

“ _Don’t move.”_

And the fabric fell from his shoulders, cascaded down and folded over the tie around his waist that had kept the garment closed. His chest heaved with his erratic breaths and he flung one arm out, his hand slamming against the wall beside her head as he caught himself.

Still those soft hands explored, spreading that heat over his bare flesh. Want crashed over him. He shook with the effort of doing as she had asked, unmoving. It was the touch of a feather moving over him, so light was her journey downward. Then pressure when her hands flattened under his navel and swept around and up, sliding across his back and around to his stomach again.

Up and up and he groaned in desperation as she moved over the sensitive pink flesh she had found. Softer than she had thought they would be. But she didn’t stop; fingers curling over his shoulders and up his neck.

Then she tugged and he felt his hair fall around his neck until she caught it, twining her fingers into it at the base of his skull.

“Kagome. _You have to stop_. Do you have any idea what you’re doing to me right now?”

His other arm came up, hand resting on the wall on the other side of her head.

She didn't feel trapped at all, though. Just safe. Safe like she had wanted in the first place. Because he had always made her feel safe.

“ ** _Everything._** ” She said.

And they moved. His hands to her hips and he didn’t have to pull because she came to him and molded herself to him. One arm around his back and the other slung over his head, his hair between her fingers, her elbow bringing him down and her up and his arms around her waist pressing them together _closer **more everything**_.

When their lips met it was a lifetime in a moment in a promise of forever. He didn’t end and she didn’t begin and they found perfection in a moment that stretched into eternity.

His teeth found her bottom lip and pulled it into his mouth so he could swipe his tongue over it and she tasted like hope and dreams and promises and her breath filled his lungs when she reclaimed her lip to follow his lead and steal his own lip, his own breath, his own sanity. He gave them to her readily, gave her everything, because it belonged to her now and forever, and he took the everything that she gave him, because it was his now and forever, and they belonged to each other. Belonged to that kiss. Belonged to this shuddering, simmering heat that they were engulfed in.

His fingers dug into her waist when her fingers tugged his hair and her nails scraped his back as he tried to pull her closer. Then they broke apart, clutching each other, gasping, heaving, swimming.

When Kagome found her footing on the floor this time, she knew that she had found her footing everywhere, now. This was right. This was it. This was him.

When Miroku found her hand and pushed his fingers between hers, he knew that he was holding his redemption, his life, and the spark of hope that he thought had died so long ago. This was right. This was it. This was her.

They smiled and didn't need to say anything. 

Miroku stepped back and Kagome followed. She knelt down on his futon and he followed. She laid down and so did he, and they clung to each other. He tucked her head under his chin and she dragged herself close and they wrapped around and into each other, trailing fingertips and tiny kisses, settling into this new perfection. Forever, they had thought. Then the slept, knowing that tomorrow would be more than a new day, it would be a new life for them each and for them both.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> AN: Whew! Now you all know. Thoughts on whether or not I should put the pairing in the beginning of the story or not will now be contemplated >_> carefully


	20. Merge

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Posted 1.24.2020  
> Unedited

Paradigm Shift

Chapter Twenty: Merge

… … …

The second day at Atsuta Shrine went much better than the first as Kagome and Miroku approached their training with a new outlook on everything. The world was now more beautiful and lighter than they had ever experienced before.

Miroku couldn't wipe the ecstatic grin from his face as he sparred with Heiji. The youkai's bruising grip on his left ankle didn't deter him one bit from the practice. He bent the knee of the immobile leg, bent at the waist, and created his own momentum. His right foot flared with blue fire and landed hard on the bear's right shoulder. Miroku continued downward, falling into a crouch right there on his trainer's shoulder, bringing his elbow around to slam into the back of Heiji's head; throwing him off balance.

Miroku followed Heiji down as he stumbled forward. He pushed himself off, using Heiji's back as a springboard when the other man's knee hit the ground. He landed in a smooth crouch a few feet behind his opponent on his left foot, using the inertia from his jump to extend his right foot out and spin his body around to face Heiji with that right leg sweeping the ground, still engulfed in his reiki.

Heiji's pleased laughter filled the air and Miroku's smile widened in response. The burly youkai planted one enormous hand on the ground in front of himself and swung his body upward, seeing Miroku's form from his upside-down position for a moment as he bent his elbow and threw himself into the air, twisting and hurtling through the empty space toward Miroku's crouched form.

Lithe sinew flexed as the bear plunged down at him, barely missing Miroku as he lunged backward a few steps. His arms ignited with his reiki from shoulders to fingertips as he brought his right elbow up and under, landing a solid blow to the soft underside of Heiji's chin; his left hand planting itself, hard, into Heiji's chest as Miroku propelled his shoulder and side into his trainer.

Heiji had to stumble back from the force of Miroku's attacks, but recovered quickly, striking out with his left leg and stepping onto Miroku's thigh, bringing his other leg across Miroku's midsection and forcing him to land hard on his back, knocking his breath from him.

"Better." Heiji said as Miroku let his reiki fade back into his skin and they smiled at each other.

Heiji stood and clasped Miroku's forearm, pulling him to his feet.

"It's been years since I've fought like that." Miroku said as they walked toward a small well nearby and dipped their hands into a hanging bucket to drink.

"Why?" Heiji asked.

"I suppose that I became dependant in battle on the one thing that I despise most of all."

Heiji eyed the fisted hand, gloved and wrapped in beads.

"You'll be dependant no more." Heiji said. "Your previous training is coming back to you easily."

"It is. I must admit that I'm pleased with the results of Tatsuo's reiki training as well."

Heiji laughed as they walked away from the small well and made their way over to where Tatsuo was showing Kagome different stances. He clapped Miroku's shoulder, sending him off balance for a moment.

"So you admit that your temple reiki channeling is useless, finally?

"I didn't say that. It has its own uses. I've come to see the advantages of being able to use it in this new way, though."

"Yes. Lord Sesshomaru taught us well."

Miroku turned widened eyes to Heiji.

"Lord Sesshomaru trained you and Tatsuo?"

"Lord Sesshomaru guided all of us here at Atsuta. We bear his mark with pride and we will gladly go to battle with him if we are ever summoned to do so.

"Why here, then? Why at a Shinto shrine?"

"You think humans are the only ones with claim to the Kami?" Honey brown eyes cut to Miroku's, amused. "Youkai have no miko or monks. So we guard the border of Lord Sesshomaru's land, gladly. Each of us were once no more than a part of a faceless army in the west. He chose us and brought us here. When he first gathered us together, he told us that we may do as we wished with Atsuta and it's lands. We all decided to keep it as it was, happy for the kami at our side while we guard the border. He trained us to control our jaki and trained us to combine it with the physical combat that we already knew."

"Miroku! Heiji! Look!" Came Kagome's excited voice.

They had closed in on Kagome and Tatsuo, relaxing down onto the grass as the two women went through their motions.

Tatsuo walked over to stand by them as they looked on. Kagome stood tall, her hands above her head, looking as if she were about to dive into the sky. Her left leg was extended, toes pointed to the ground at an angle. She lifted herself onto the ball of her right foot and turned slowly, bringing her hands down in an arc to each side and trailing from her foot and hands were rivulets of her reiki.

The energy began to spin with her, encasing her in a bubble of swirling pink; her face bright and her eyes brighter; lit with that now familiar amethyst shine. The bubble lifted her and hovered barely above the ground as she ended with her arms by her sides and her palms turned forward, feeding her reiki into the barrier in a trickle.

"It won't stop anything but energies, though. But it's pretty cool, huh!?"

Miroku went to Kagome and walked around her and the bubble of reiki, looking over them both, impressed and utterly fascinated. He felt the energy tug at him, call him to Kagome's side.

"She didn't have a problem calling her reiki today, so I showed her a few of the ways I use my jaki in battle and told her to try coming up with some of her own. This is what she came up with." Tatsuo pointed at Kagome with a lopsided grin.

"Ah! I wouldn't do that, Soto-zen!" She yelled as Miroku's hand reached toward the swirls of pink reiki with his hand wrapped in blue flames.

All four of them were taken aback as Miroku's hand passed through the bubble easily. He didn't seem to have heard Tatsuo at all. He was entranced.

"When I touched it, it threw me onto my ass way over there!" Tatsuo yelled, pointing a good distance off to the left, to a flattened patch of flowers in the garden.

Heiji put his hand on Tatsuo's shoulder, halting her as she began to move toward them. The two youkai stared in amazement as Kagome's eyes widened and she started to tremble when Miroku's foot found purchase on the inside of the barrier He stood in front of her and hovered above the ground with her.

Kagome and Miroku didn't have any attention left for their surroundings, staring into each other. Their reiki started to crawl over their whole bodies as they stepped close to each other. As Miroku mirrored Kagome's position, their hands joined.

Their reiki began to mix, shooting from their joined hands up and around in spurts and jets of purple energy.

Tatsuo and Heiji moved away from Kagome and Miroku as they watched the blue leap from him, onto Kagome, and start mingling and mixing around her. It expanded, wrapping now around them both, across the rest of their bodies, and they leaned toward each other.

The whole bubble had turned a glaringly bright purple now. It looked less like a bubble and more like a globe of iridescent water. Their clothing and hair whipped around them both inside the orb.

As their lips met, the ball of energy pulsed once. Twice. Their arms came around, wrapping them together, and they started to float higher and higher.

" _What's_ _ **happening**_ " Heiji roared in a panicked voice as Miroku and Kagome continued to rise together into the sky.

"I have no idea! I've never seen anything like this!"

The other occupants of the shrine filtered out of the buildings and across the grounds to stand under the floating couple, wanting to witness whatever was happening.

The ball of energy began to compress into a spinning disc around them, widening and brightening before it shot outward around the with a crack like a whip that was loud enough to make all of the youkai below drop to their knees holding their ears.

Then there was an echoing sound of rushing wind, like a tornado, and the light rushed back to its origin, dragging streaks of pink and white and black along behind it.

Kagome and Miroku began a slow descent to the ground as the reiki settled back into them, with the streaks of pink, black, and white raced around them in the same curves that the, now gone, bubble had occupied.

Their feet touched the ground and as Miroku stepped away from Kagome there was a sizzling and the black streaks turned pink. When the hissing subsided, the orbs of white light slammed into Kagome and her mouth opened in a silent scream as it happened.

She collapsed into the dirt and grass and flowers with dozens of Shikon shards falling around her prone form as she fell unconscious.

… … …

A few miles east of Atsuta Shrine, an unearthly scream tore through the area. When villagers nearest to the source went to investigate, they found only a set of miko garb covered in wet clay, a bow and a quiver full of arrows.

… … …

Tatsuo ran to Kagome, lifted her and then ran again, heading to the little cottage at the edge of the shrine's grounds.

… … …

In a five mile radius around Atsuta Shrine, over a dozen low level youkai could be found dead or injured, having had Shikon shards ripped from their bodies.

… … …

Heiji approached the still figure of Miroku cautiously. He was standing in the same place, still staring at the empty spot where Kagome had fallen.

… … …

Nozomi burst through the door of her home as Tatsuo ran up to her with her arms full of unconscious miko.

… … …

Black boots slid over crimson-stained mud, his eyes bleeding red as he took in the sight of his loyal fallen.

… … …

Crashes resounded through the cottage as the contents of Nozomi's kitchen table were swept onto the floor.

… … …

Heiji touched Miroku's shoulder, but quickly withdrew his arm as Miroku's eyes snapped to his face for half of a second before Miroku bolted, following in Tatsuo's wake and leaving the scattered jewel shards behind him.

The door of the cottage burst open once more, admitting Miroku. He shoved his way between the two youkai women, trying to get to Kagome.

… … …

A massive white dog howled in pain and anger, crushing his attackers underfoot.

… … …

"Stop! You have to let me get to her!"

Miroku was quite a sight, his eyes still tinged the same bright lavender that Kagome's had shone when their reiki had mixed. He was absolutely clawing at Nozomi and Tatsuo and doing a fairly good impression of an inuyoukai growl.

"Let him go to her" Heiji said in his deep, calm voice. "We don't know what's happening, but _they_ might."

Miroku didn't spare the three of them any attention as he went to Kagome and leaned over her, clasping his hands around her face and covering her mouth with his own.

Kagome's back arched dramatically away from the table as the purple reiki rose from their skin like rain going the wrong way. The most astounding sight filled the room as their auras flared, both of them a richer, deeper shade of that same purple, giving the whole process the appearance of water dripping upward on a glass pane.

began to spiral around them once more. The three youkai moved as far away from them as they could, backing into the far wall and just bearing witness.

The reiki spun faster and faster around Kagome and Miroku. Then it began to pull apart, separating into flames of blue and vapors of pink mist as it slowed and found its way back into each of them.

Miroku fell to his knees by the low table, his head pillowed on Kagome's chest and his hands gripping the edge of the wooden surface. He took long deep breaths before he said anything.

"I don't know how. Or why." His voice was muffled as he spoke directly into Kagome's skin, but they could hear him easily enough. "She somehow _mixed_ us together." His next breath shuddered through him, overwhelmed and exhausted as he was now. "Not just our reiki, which should be impossible in the first place. Our _auras._ " One of his hands reached up to Kagome's hair, smoothing it away from her face as he turned his head to look at her, pressing his cheek against the rise and fall of her breast. "When she fainted… we stayed together." Kagome began to stir. "I don't think we completely untangled, either. There's a piece of her still with me. I can feel it." He cupped Kagome's cheek with his hand as her eyes opened. "There's a piece of me in her now too."

The experience shook him, left him both exhilarated and strangely empty now that it was over. He had felt Kagome's very _life_ coursing through his being. He'd seen and felt and lived parts of her life and for a little while, he had felt separated from parts of his own.

"Miroku?"

Kagome's touch on his hand was soft and her eyes were confused as she came to.

" _Kagome._ Are you alright?"

She reached up and pulled Miroku into a gentle kiss.

"Maybe you two shouldn't do that…" Tatsuo said, causing Kagome and Miroku to break apart and look at her. "No offense… but last time you kissed some pretty strange things happened."

Nozomi and Heiji nodded slowly in agreement.

Miroku laughed, but Kagome's eyes were fixed on the doorway of the cottage, beside Heiji's foot. She pointed.

"Heiji? Are those…?" Her hand wrapped around Miroku's wrist as she sat up. He followed her line of sight to a pile of scattered jewel shards that were there, twitching and trying to get past Heiji's foot. As soon as the bear looked down and lifted his boot, the shards flipped end over end or rolled toward the table where Kagome sat. "Miroku?"

"Shards…" He muttered.

"Why are they… moving?"

Miroku's brows drew together and he bent, picking one up and letting it rest in the middle of his palm. As soon as he straightened and turned to Kagome, the thing flew from his hand and stuck to Kagome's cheek.

She tried to pull it off, confused, but there was a prick, like the sting of a mosquito, and a spark of pink lit up on her cheek. Then the shard was gone.

"What the hell!?" Kagome shrieked.

Miroku rubbed a finger over the place where the shard had soaked into her skin.

"You're absorbing them?"

"Apparently! How is that even possible!?"

Kagome leaned over the side of the table to look at the jumping, wiggling slivers as Miroku crouched down.

"Does this look like all of them? He asked.

"No, it doesn't."

"Why would you be calling the shards of the Shikon no Tama, Kagome?" Nozomi had come closer, bending at the waist to peer at the shards over Miroku's shoulder. "I've heard that they corrupt any who possess them."

"Not Kagome." Miroku mumbled, poking at them with a finger. "Her touch has always purified them."

"Yeah. It came from inside of me so…

"Kagome!" Miroku swept up a handful of the shards, standing quickly and dropping them onto her body. "They came from _inside of you_."

"Ouch, Miroku! Those things hurt when they do that! Ooooh! Oh! That makes sense. Sort of." She still glared at him while she rubbed the tingling sensation out of her thigh. "Why wouldn't they have ever done that before, though?"

"You told us when you arrived that your reiki had been fully unlocked recently. Perhaps that is why?" Nozomi suggested.

"What were the other things?"

The three of them looked at Heiji. "There were orbs. White orbs. They went into your body."

Now _that_ sounded familiar. After Kikyo had been resurrected, Sango had described the whole scene to her, telling her that part of her soul had been stolen.

"Kikyo…."

"That would mean that you have all of your soul again, Kagome."

"Kikyo's dead." Kagome said. She leaned over the edge of the table and let her hand hang off, watching the shards stand on their ends in an attempt to rejoin with her body.

"Kikyo has been dead for a very long time, Kagome. Your soul was never hers to take. When she died, her soul was reclaimed by the Buddha."

"Kami…" Four voices interrupted him. He pinched the bridge of his nose.

"Her soul was reclaimed… Kikyo's soul was torn to tattered scraps when she died. She was ripped apart by hate and revenge. What was left of Kikyo's soul only became the first threads in a tapestry. It is everything in between those threads that make Kagome who she is, make her soul so beautiful. Kikyo stole Kagome's soul. It was not hers to take. It hasn't been her soul for a very long time. That's how reincarnation works. You are remade, made better than the previous soul. Changed. Not copied."

Kagome's face was the picture of happiness as Miroku's words settled over her.

"I love you, you know." She whispered to him, bending down a little more and wincing as the rest of the shards sparked and glowed and joined her again. Then she sat up and swung her legs over the edge of the table. She stood and put her hands on his broad chest.

"I love you too, you know." He told her, wrapping her up in his arms. They both laughed quietly.

Heiji coughed into his fist from the corner where the far wall and the doorway met.

"So that means you" He pointed to Kagome. "Called a missing piece of your soul back to you."

Kagome and Miroku nodded.

"And you called the Shikon shards to you, as well." He gestured to the floor. "Because they were part of you, too, in the first place."

Two more nods.

"You also called his" He pointed at Miroku. "Reiki and soul into you." Kagome turned a questioning gaze to Miroku as he nodded to Heiji. "…Because…?"

Miroku smiled down at the woman in his arms and tucked her hair behind her ear as he answered softly.

"Because that's where I belong, too."

Heiji let out a snort of laughter and Nozomi smiled. Tatsuo grimaced.

"So much for thinking that you were learning control, miko!" She shouted accusingly at Kagome. "Too good to be true, of course!" She glared daggers into Miroku.

"You're going to blame me again. Aren't you?" He sighed and closed his eyes.

Tatsuo scowled.

"If you're all done with your chatter, Shoo!" The firey inuyoukai waved her arms at Miroku and Kagome. "Go! Sleep! Tomorrow, you," She stuck a finger into Kagome's shoulder. "Back to basics again! And you!" She glared at Miroku and threw her hands in the air with a huff, marching out of the cottage.


	21. Steam

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> AN: I know I missed one update a few days ago >_> which was because my laundry was threatening to begin attacking me if I walked by it again. However! I missed yesterday’s update because this chapter took me two days to write. It doesn’t seem nearly as long on FFnet as it does on AO3 though.
> 
> … … …
> 
> Also, It is a massive pet peeve of mine that it seems like no one understands the concept of a hymen. Kagome is a virgin in this story, yes. There is no mystical barrier of skin that covers or divides or what-have-you. SO! For those of you who don’t know, and may be surprised or confused by some of the goings-on in my scenes, here’s a short impromptu sex-ed lesson to justify two lines of written conversation.
> 
> … … …
> 
> The hymen is not that different from the weather-stripping on your car window. It’s a thin but resilient flap that spans the upper and side portions of the birth canal- the interior vagina. The first few experiences CAN be quite painful and bloody due to IMPROPER knowledge and care when first becoming sexually active. A woman's inner workings are similar to… say, a rubber band. It’s stiff and unforgiving at first- almost brittle. This is what causes pain for the woman if she is not fully aroused or prepared. During arousal and with some attention, blood will fill the area- both internal and external; JUST like a man’s body. Then, just like that rubber band, once warmed and worked carefully, the woman’s areas become accommodating and yielding, stretching easily to welcome her partner.
> 
> Going back to the weather-stripping example- the hymen itself actually curls and recedes with constant use. Like any other part of the body. If you wear a tight corset every day, your waist will hold that shape eventually. If you pierce your ears and constantly wear earrings, the holes will retain that shape and not seal over. If you wear a wedding band every day, you will eventually have an indent in its shape on your finger. And FUN FACT, just like the rest of the body, if that constant presence is lost, it will return to its previous state. It takes between three to seven years for women to “regrow” their hymen.
> 
> It never goes away, it is not ever broken, and it only TEARS when someone is not doing it right.
> 
> In fact, though women might not realize what they’re feeling, there is a very real and very noticeable sensation in certain amorous positions and angles where the hymen will catch on the indent between the head and shaft of a man’s length. It’s a pretty strange sensation, honestly. Makes a weird clicking noise that can SOMETIMES be audible, but is always felt, and sort of… tugs.
> 
> … … …
> 
> We all know that Miroku is supposed to be experienced and that’s part of him in my fic, so.
> 
> Well, it’s apparent in this chapter.
> 
> SO!
> 
> There’s that.
> 
> Just saying. Peeve.
> 
> *cough*
> 
> And on to chapter twenty-one we go. Again, explicit scenes. As FFnet does not allow full adult content in its terms of service agreement, see Elebelle at AO3 for full content if you are of age for such content. *coughblushcough*
> 
> … … …  
> Posted 1.26.2020  
> Unedited

Paradigm Shift

Chapter Twenty-one: Steam

… … …

Standing outside of Nozomi’s home, Miroku and Kagome looked at each other, chagrined at the actions of the little inuyoukai trainer.

“Did Tatsuo just scold us and send us to our rooms?” There was a hint of laughter in Kagome’s voice.

Miroku chuckled and began to walk along the path that led from the humble cottage toward the center of the grounds.

“I do believe so. We’ve been shoo’d away to bed in the middle of the day by a frustrated parent.”

Kagome grinned and jogged up to Miroku’s side.

“I, however, fully intend to bathe and then enjoy a light mid-afternoon meal.” His tone was playfully haughty and he stuck his nose in the air with a blank face to accent the air of arrogance. Only his poorly repressed smirk betrayed the act.

“Yeah, I don’t think that I could sleep now anyway. Don’t get me wrong, I’m still sore from _yesterday’s_ training.” She made a face and held up her arms, hunching over. “I _stink_ though. Eugh.”

Miroku wrapped an arm around her waist and pulled Kagome into his side roughly. It made her squeal softly in surprise.

“I don’t mind.” He teased, gracing her with that familiar playful smirk.

Kagome smacked his chest with the back of her hand in response, but didn’t move from under his arm. She reached up her right hand and wrapped the hem of his white juban’s sleeve around her finger. They walked like that the whole way to the bath house where Miroku opened the door and gestured her inside with an exaggerated flourish and bow.

Kagome grabbed a fistful of his shirt, laughing, and pulled him in front of her, holding the door open with one foot as she shoved at his back to push him into the building before her. Miroku grinned and tilted his head back to look at her upside down, leaning his weight into her hands and making her laugh even harder. She planted her head into his back and pushed him forward with her hands on his hips. They were both laughing boisterously as they entered the building.

“You’re heavy!” Kagome grunted as Miroku bent his back even more and threw his arms out to the sides.

“I have faith in your strength, my dear Kagome!” He shouted dramatically. “Don’t give up!” He stopped moving his feet to help Kagome as she pushed him toward the massive bathing area. He slid along the floor though, slick as it was from condensation.

Miroku’s almost lost his limited balance and flattened Kagome as she gave his back a great shove and twisted around, letting him fall onto her own back. She crammed the heels of her hiking boots into the crevices of the tiled floor, able to push him forward more easily and quicker.

After only a few steps, Miroku started digging in his own feet, though. Trying to prevent her from pushing him further.

“Kagome!”

“ _Move!_ ” Kagome shouted playfully in between laughs. “We stink! Bath time!”

“Kagome! We’re already-

Miroku’s words were cut off with a loud splash and then Kagome was falling backward, stumbling as she was betrayed by her own efforts to push him along, and another loud splash as they both fell into the water.

They broke the surface of the water, gasping, and Miroku was laughing harder than ever as he saw Kagome scrambling to the edge of the pool and trying to lift herself out. He waded over to her and wrapped his arms around her waist, pulling her back away from safety.

“Miroku! This is silk!” She was bent in two, arms flailing and hands paddling at the water to escape him fruitlessly.

“Now, now. You only have yourself to blame!”

“Miroku!”

“Kagome!”

She pried at his fingers clasped around his forearms, imprisoning her.

“Let me out!” But she was smiling and biting back laughter, herself.

Their clothes floated and billowed about in the water when she was finally released. She huffed and slammed her hand into the surface of the water, splashing Miroku’s face as she waded back to the edge of the pool and pushed herself up, turning and plopping down on her rump, dragging her legs out of the water and staring at her boots in dread.

“It’s going to take _ages_ for my shoes to dry out.” She grumbled in frustration, untying the laces and pulling them off. She twisted and set the sodden boots behind her when she felt Miroku’s fingers on her ankle.

“It was worth it.” He said, smiling and peeling her modern pink socks from her feet. He tossed them near her boots and looked at her as he grasped her ankle and _pulled_.

Suddenly her sopping clothes didn’t matter anymore, because Miroku was hanging her knees over the bends of his elbows and pulling her to him at the edge of the water. Her toes went in and out of the water behind him as it rippled, swishing back and forth from their previous flustering.

Kagome put her hands behind her, leaning slightly on them to keep herself upright as Miroku dragged her right to the very edge and against his upper chest. She flushed when his head bent, eyes still on hers, and his lips pressed against the top of her left thigh.

His hands crept up her legs, bending her knees and lifting her thighs higher- closer to her own body as he leaned forward and hooked his fingers in the top of her hakama. He stilled, not moving, just watching her. She hesitated when his cheek pressed into her inner thigh, searching his serious face, glancing to his parted lips, back to his eyes, seeing him watching for her reaction in askance.

She shifted her weight slightly, bringing one hand around to the ties that held her pants in place, and slowly, gently, pulled at one end of the string; loosening it for him. She bent forward and moved a wet lock of hair from Miroku’s face. Those beautiful, unique eyes watched her carefully as he tugged at the folded silken waistband, loosening it.

Kagome smiled a small smile and pushed up on her hands and her knees that were still around his elbows, lifting herself. Her head fell back, wild dark hair falling behind her and pooling on the tile; save for the few wet strands that stuck to her shoulders and chest, dripping water into the already sodden haori. The silk peeled from her skin sinuously and slowly, exposing her- exposing the thin, blue, lace panties she wore- exposing the creamy pale expanse of her thighs, and sending a rush of warmth through all of her as his fingers trailed along behind the wet silk.

When her hakama were bunched around her knees, Miroku let her legs slip from atop his arms and ran his palms up over her calves and back to their task. He dropped light kisses just above her knee as the hakama were totally pulled away and she was freed.

Kagome licked her lips and fell back onto her forearms, eyes still glued to Miroku’s as he caressed every part of her smooth legs that he could reach.

She was so aware, so utterly drawn to every detail of him as he moved. The contrast of soft and rough across his bare palm where the skin was marred by callouses. The beads of his rosary and the water dripping from his glove; dripping down her skin. The thin but coarse, masculine hair that covered his strong arms.

She sucked in a breath and stilled his hands with one of her own when his fingers slid under the blue lace at her hips.

The fingers retreated to the edge of the tiled floor and he thrust himself out of the water, towering over her. She scooted back to make room for him as his knee settled between her legs, just barely touching her heated core.

Then he was covering her, his knees on each side of her left thigh, his hands on each side of her face, his clothes streaming cold water over her heated body.

Kagome’s hands came up around Miroku’s neck and she walked her fingers over the white fabric, pushing it into her palms and dragging the back of the juban up. When he bent his head forward, she pulled it over and dragged the wet cloth down his arms. He freed one hand and used the other to toss the shirt aside, lowering his lips to hers in a gentle brush of velvet as he discarded it.

He tried to lift his head away to look at her again, but it fell to her shoulder with a groan when she lifted her thigh to shyly brush against the insides of his legs.

Encouraged by Miroku’s reaction to her, she moved her small hands up his forearms, elbows, biceps, feeling him tense and release and twitch under her timid ministrations.

Her fingers brushed over his shoulder blades and down, dipping into the valley between hard muscle where his spine bent, moving down that length and slipping under the waistband of his own pants. Scalding air hit Kagome's neck as Miroku sighed against her; his face cradled between her throat and shoulder.

She mimicked his actions from a few days ago and followed the line of the waistband around his hips, back and forth and back and forth with her fingers on his skin and her palms flat against him and her thumbs hooked over the cotton.

_“Kagome.”_

The sound of her name from his lips, wrapped in desire made her eyes close and roll back in pleasure as she moaned softly next to his ear. Her own voice full of the same desire made his arms pull in, squeezing her tightly and his fingers dig into the balls of her shoulders as if he was clinging to her for dear life.

He fisted his hands in the silk that covered her still, tugging at it fervently.

 _“Off. Please. Take it off.”_ He pleaded, the sound deep and breathy; sending shivers through her.

Kagome wrapped her arms tightly, pulling herself flush against his bare chest in a desperate embrace. When she lowered herself back to the tile, she pushed against him to make him lift away from her reluctantly.

She took the bottom of her haori in her hands and pulled it up, calmer than she had ever thought she would be as inch upon inch was revealed to his hungry gaze. There were twin echoes of satisfaction when he touched the newly exposed flesh; following the path of the silk upward as it was peeled away.

Miroku knew nothing but bliss as the slope of the underside of her breasts were uncovered. He ran his thumb over one of the delicate curves and watched as it swayed with the gasp and following sigh that his touch had pulled from the beauty beneath him.

His breath caught in his throat and need coursed though his whole being when the haori didn’t stop there. A guttural sound vibrated through Kagome from Miroku’s abdomen atop her own. She tugged the haori fully away from herself and pushed it away, back behind her head. Her chest rose and fell energetically as her lungs filled and emptied in short, heavy gasps.

Miroku admired the firm rosy coronas as they tightened and wrinkled, puckering at his attention. He pushed his palm gently over the mound, brushing his thumb against the hardened little bud that called to him. The little bit of self-control that he employed slipped for a moment when his caress made Kagome arch against him, keening with pleasure and the desire for _more_. It made his hand tighten around her breast, squeezing the supple flesh that fit perfectly in his palm. He straightened his left leg, still situated between her thighs, and pressed his hip down into her pelvis; sliding the strength of his own thigh against the heat between her legs.

She could feel the hardness and the throbbing of his attraction pressing against the crook between her leg and pelvis, which sent her arching against him again, making her rub against his thigh once more, driving her to the brink of insanity, begging him to _keep touching her_ with noises that weren’t words- in a language that lovers share through passionate embraces.

His hand released her, moving up and over the swell of her chest, to her neck, wrapping around the side of her throat with his fingers spread wide; thumb and index fingers cupping her jawbone, pinky brushing against her collarbone, pushing her face to the side, making her feel the cold tiles and then his thumb pressing her chin to make her watch as he took the other pert nub into his mouth.

Her hand flew to claw at his on her neck, grasping and squeezing and clutching as he brought her to heights of ecstasy that she had never known were possible. The sight of him watching her watch him, doing what he was doing, pushing her into madness, had her writhing for him. She dug the nails of her other hand into the plane of his back, pulling him to her as if she could draw him close enough to become _part_ of her.

When Miroku’s eyes fluttered closed and he virtually sobbed a moan into her breast, it sent rolling vibrations through them both and her legs fell further apart, her feet sliding back toward her so that she could lift against him. The press and pulse of his length against her barely covered center had her practically screaming with her high-pitched moans while she curled herself around him.

Miroku slipped his bare arm under and around Kagome’s waist, nearly lifting her completely off of the floor and crushing her into himself. He tilted then vertically, letting Kagome’s bottom bounce once and then settle on the smooth tiles as he sat back; kneeling before her. She whimpered into his shoulder with her arms around his neck at the loss of his skin on hers.

Kagome held her breath as a knee pressed past her side, bringing Miroku around and eventually behind her when she dropped her arms from his neck. He unfolded one leg; letting it lay straight in front of them and grasped her hips, bringing her up to sit on top of his other, bent leg- into his lap.

His tongue licked up the side of her throat and caught the lobe of her ear between his lips as he tugged her close. 

“Kagome.” His right arm, the one still covered with cloth and beads, drifted down her body and rested at the top of her blue lace barrier. “May I?” His voice was low, husky, imploring by her reddened ear. “ _Please._ ”

“ _Oh Kami, **yes**!_” And her own hands went to her underwear. She pressed her shoulders into Miroku’s back and lifted herself off the ground, ripping the thin lace down to mid-thigh. She relaxed back onto his leg and tugged his hand back into place combing through the nest of soft curls.

Her urgency and her boldness had Miroku breathing raggedly into her neck in between soft moans.

“Forgive the coverings, Kagome. I need my right hand for what I’m about to do to you.” He whispered into her neck.

“Oh pleasepleaseplease.” Kagome begged, she nodded vigorously and squirmed around in his arms, needing more. Needing him to _touch_. **_Now_**. Lifted her hips, tried to get closer to his touch.

And when those sinful fingers slid over her slick folds, her lungs were paralyzed in anticipation. When her parted her and dipped into her heat, teasing at her opening and making the beads of his rosary glide over the sensitive bundle of nerves, she screamed for him.

Wanton moans and heaving breaths and shudders of pleasure wracked her body when he finally dipped one finger into her.

“You’re amazing, Kagome. Beautiful. Perfect. Stunning.” The words were soft and awed by her ear as he worked her higher and higher and closer and closer to the brink of a completion that she had only ever heard rumors of.

“Come on, beautiful.” He buried his nose in her hair, filling his lungs with the scent of her. “Finish for me.”

She arched and bucked and shuddered at his words, choking back a whimper.

“I don’t want to be finished. Don’t want- Ah! Don’t want it it end.”

He chuckled low and she again felt the sound ring through her own chest.

“Finish doesn’t mean _done_ , my love.”

And the heel of his hand pressed into the mound of curls and his fingers pushed up to the top of her, within her, _inside_ , and touched something _wonderful_ , and she _did_ finish, pouring that warm fluid from inside of her, coating his hand and soaking into his glove as she convulsed around his fingers.

He pushed in and out of her slowly, leisurely, prolonging that peak of her climax as every part of her body tightened with it, caressing her side, her waist, her hip, and back up, over and over in pleased comfort while she came down from the rush. He kissed the corner of her mouth once she had calmed, whispering, “ _thank you_.” against her lips with a smirk.

Kagome’s giggle was a barely-there breathy thing.

“I should be the one saying that, don’t you think?” Her head shifted and twisted and she looked up into his eager expression.

“Absolutely not. I feel privileged to have brought you to rapture.”

She smiled wide at him. The way that he had with words made _her_ feel privileged to be the recipient of such elegant speech. Her train of thought vanished in the next instant as Miroku gave her a sly look and moved his fingers where they were still buried in her.

“ I _did_ say that we weren’t done.” He told her. “I finally have you under me and I’m not done with you yet.”

“Mmmm.” The sound of her agreement urged him into a kiss at her temple. “You know,” She said in a sly tone of voice. “Technically…” Her hand smoothed over his still clothed leg at her side. “I’m not under you.”

Miroku slipped his fingers out of her and tightened his freed right arm around her waist, bracing them on his left hand as he twisted them over abruptly.

“Now you are.” He growled the words and gently lowered her chest to the floor. Her head turned as she went down compliantly, letting the left side of her face rest against the cool surface.

When he pressed his hips into the bare swell of her backside, her back arched instinctively, only succeeding in pushing her harder into his erect length.

Kagome squirmed and wiggled and tried to twist around under him but she was caged by his presence above her; not that she was trying overly hard to escape. That heat flooded her body again as he pushed himself up away from her back and peppered her back with soft kisses.

Miroku pushed himself to his knees, happy that Kagome didn’t try to turn over again, and leaned over with his hand on her hips. He nuzzled the smooth creamy skin of one cheek, smiled against it and then nipped it, drawing a squeak of surprise from her.

“Did you just _bite_ my butt!?”

“Mhm. Did you like it?” He purred.

“I.. don’t know. I was surprised.”

She shivered when he licked over the reddened bite mark.

“Want me to do it again?” His hands on her hips bent her, pulled her soft, sweet flesh into the air; halfway between lying flat and on her knees. When she didn’t say anything, he kissed and licked the spot again. “If you don’t tell me no, I’m going to.”

She remained silent and he bit her softly this time, closing his lips around the spot when his teeth released her, sucking at it and then pulling back to lick it again before straightening and reaching down to tug her panties the rest of the way off her legs.

His hands roamed everywhere they could reach and expletives describing her beauty tumbled from him as he plunged two fingers deep into her, twisting them around with each draw out and push in. Too soon for Kagome’s liking, she was empty again; being guided by gentle pushes and tugs and nudges to lay on her back again.

Kagome reached out quickly and dragged Miroku to her in an urgent, needy kiss. His hands cupped her face as he moaned into her mouth, excited by her exuberance. He moved back down, continuing toward his previous goal once her fingers had loosened from his hair.

Kagome propped herself up on her elbows again, watching him move down her body. Her eyes widened and her thighs smacked together when his line of kisses reached too close to that patch of dark hair, though.

Miroku planted his chin on her raised knee, almost pouting as he looked at her.

“No?”

Her head whipped back and forth frantically. She just wasn’t ready for something that she considered so adventurous yet. She laughed nervously.

“You’re determined to kiss every inch of me, aren’t you?”

Miroku raised an eyebrow at her lopsided smile, answering with a smirk.

“But of course.” He made a show of planting sloppy, noisy, silly mock-kisses all over her kneecap before looking back into her eyes. “I won’t press though. All you have to do is tell me to stop whenever you wish.”

Kagome’s face softened and her heart warmed to match the rest of her. She reached out her hand to him, beckoning him. He complied readily, lining his body back into place over hers.

They just watched each other for a while, touching faces, gliding over contours, just memorizing each other. Once Kagome realized that he had given her control again, was waiting for some sort of signal from her to stop or to keep going, she lifted her left thigh and rubbed it into his hip and side, hoping that was enough to encourage him again.

“Tell me what you want, Kagome. Tell me what you need.”

Her lip hid between her teeth as she tried to overcome her bashfulness and give him an answer to such a straightforward request. Just the sound of his voice, that undercurrent of an unyielding demand wrapped in so much tenderness, fogged her mind and stole her voice.

“You have to tell me, Kagome.” His head nudged her chin up and he suckled at the underside of her jaw. “I have to hear you say it.”

“ _Everything_.” She finally whispered.

“Everything?”

He nipped and bit at her collarbone until her nodding inhibited him.

“ _Yes_.”

He hovered over her again, kissing her gently.

“You’re sure?”

“ _Yes._ ” And she nodded again, gripping his shoulders tightly.

So he pushed himself away from her, rocking himself back onto his feet, still kneeling, and watched her as his hands dropped to the line of buttons at his waist and hips. One by one he slid all five of them apart, waiting for her to tell him to stop, wondering if she was truly ready for this so soon.

She didn’t stop him, though.

So he stood up and leaned down to free the buttons from their place around his calves and ankles.

Kagome found the whole process captivatingly erotic, even as he broke eye contact with her to tend to the _far too many_ buttons on the bottom half of his pants. Nodding to herself in determination, she sat up and reached over, unbuttoning the side that he wasn’t already working on.

Miroku paused when she started helping him. He looked over, but only saw the back of her head as she concentrated on her self-appointed task. He skimmed one hand down her spine with a smile and then returned to his buttons.

Kagome looked up at him, so much innocence on her face, so close to him that he ached. Now it was her turn to bestow a shower of kisses. Her thumbs found purchase inside the waist of the gray fabric and Miroku groaned, resting his hands on her hair, leaning his head back as she _pulled_ , torturously slow, undressing him.

Never in all of his experience had he been with a woman so bold, so forward; even just in actions if not words. It made him want to coax more of this brazen attitude to the surface even as it made him weak with disbelief and awe.

She had him more ready, more wanting, more aroused than he could ever remember being. He stepped away from the cloth as he felt her fingers wrap around his heels, pulling each foot clear of the material.

Her dainty, soft hand wrapped around him and her eyes looked up to his face, not quite knowing what to do next. He lost every shred of control that he had left and she was under him before she knew what had happened.

He could feel the way her legs clenched so hard around his hips in her nervousness. Saw the way she screwed her eyes closed.

“Shh. We don’t have to do this, Kagome. It’s okay.” He rested his forehead in the dip between her breasts and rubbed her side soothingly, trying to calm her anxiety.

“Miroku?” He looked up, placing his chin where his forehead had been moments ago.

“Hmm?” His heart clenched at the welling tears in her eyes. He pushed himself up on one elbow, wiping away the offending moisture. “What’s wrong?”

Kagome covered her face with her hands and her voice was muffled when she spoke.

“Will it hurt a lot? I know it’s supposed to hurt, but will it be really bad?”

“Oh, Kagome.” He pulled at one wrist, tugging a hand down from her face and her other hand followed on its own. “It doesn’t have to hurt at all. I promise.” He kissed her again and moved his hand down to tweak a soft nipple, smiling as she responded. “I promise.” He repeated.

He moved that hand down, searching for and finding that little bundle of nerves that his rosary had pressed against earlier. With light touches there, and fervent licks, kisses, and suckles to each soft rise of her chest, he readied her for him; feeling her warm under his hand and flood with moisture once again.

Kagome gripped the sides of his chest as she felt him press against her. The anticipation and desire took turns pouring fire and ice through her body. She felt Miroku’s hair brush against her cheek and neck as he returned his head to the crook of her neck and shoulder again.

And then he was pushing into her, so very gently, so very slowly, and she felt every inch of him fill her, stretch her, and she was consumed by the feel of it.

“Okay?” He whispered into her skin.

She nodded, panting, overcome with the sensations racing through her body.

When he moved, sliding out of her, she threw her arms around his neck and arched into him with a loud moan. It felt so good, unlike anything she could ever describe, and the fact that it was _him_ and he was _in her_ and _filling her_ overwhelmed her senses.

Then he was pushing back into her again and it was mind numbing. She lost herself and just **_felt_** as he found a rhythm, bringing her up and closer to the peak of elation. The heat of his breath warmed her neck and she felt the clenching of his jaw with each thrust, knowing that he was as lost in her as she was in him. When he pushed himself up on his arms and looked down to watch her, to see just what he was making her feel, glanced down to watch himself move within her and then back to her face with that devious smirk.

He knew exactly how amazing this was for her, she knew that it was just as amazing for him as she watched that smirk fade from his face; slowly being replaced by an expression of utmost revelry.

He showed her so many different ways to find bliss.

Slow, gentle, _maddening_.

Slow still, but _deeper_ and pressing into her so far that he had no room left to enter her any farther.

Fast and shallow, _teasing_ her with the expectation of more.

Fast, deep, hard into her in a way that she never expectation to make her _wanton_ for _more_.

She had to fight through the haze of pleasure that fogged her mind when he stilled, pushing his hand against her hip to keep her from moving as well. He was _buried_ in her, not moving. She could feel every bit of him in her like this. Could feel the pulse that matched his heartbeat, could feel hers in response, could focus on what it felt like to have him stretching her and opening her for him. His breathing was jagged, his whole body shaking above her.

Kagome ran her hands up and down his neck, nuzzled her cheek into his, kissed the skin right under his ear.

“Are you okay?” She asked hesitantly.

“Shh. Don’t move.”

Flashes of their first kiss went through her mind when he said those words, the same words that she had said to him yesterday. She had been so overwhelmed then, needing to control the pace, feeling like she would burst with the excitement of it all. Overwhelmed… Her lips fell to his neck as _mischief_ filled her eyes, unseen. He was _overwhelmed by her_.

She licked the shell of his ear, heard him groan into her shoulder. Moved her hands between their bodies, snaking them around to his back, feeling the jutting on one shoulder where he held her hip down to keep her pinned and unmoving. Felt the sinuous and seductive angle of his back; twisted at the waist and rested on his forearm on the other side in contrast to the extension that pushed his left side above and away from her chest.

Then she reached as far as she could toward his neck with her arms wrapped around and behind his chest, dug her nails into his skin and _scratched_ down that broad, hard, expanse. The mischief in her expression grew when his shaking intensified. _She_ was doing this to _him_.She kissed at the place where his neck curved into his shoulder and _bit down_.

“ _Nnngh. Kagome…_ Oh dear Buddha save me from this woman.”

Kagome didn’t realize that he had any room left to push deeper into her, but he did; drawing a moan from her and causing her to release his flesh from her mouth. She dragged her nails across his back again, around his waist, slid her fingers across his hips and _pushed_ against him, despite the hand pinning her to the floor.

“ _Stop it, woman!_ Or this will be over too soon.”

Kagome grinned at the thought and wriggled her hips against him, arched her spine to pull away, flexed her legs to bring her back flush with him again. Then he was sitting up; kneeling before her, pulling one of her knees up and draping it over his shoulder. Reflexively, she planted the toes of her other foot on his lower leg behind him for balance, pressing that thigh into and around his hip.

And he _was_ moving again. This new position was so much more intense, so much more maddeningly pleasurable. And it _didn’t_ last long. With a few move thrusts, and a final dive into the depths of her, she _felt_ him finish in her. _Felt_ that warmth spill from him and fill her in a very different sort of way. _Held_ him close as he fell against her chest. _Loved_ him as his heartbeat calmed and his arms squeezed her sides. _Rolled_ with him as he tried to move off of her so that she could breathe more easily without his pressing weight.

She straddled him there as he laid on his back, bonelessly and satiated, rubbing soothing circles into the small of her back. She wiggled at the new sensation of him softening inside her. Showered little kisses across his chest as she curled around him.

Kagome squeaked and gasped at the feeling when he lifted her bottom and slid out of her, sitting up with her hands on his chest, smiling widely.

But he was looking at her with concern. She looked down at the feather light touch on her belly.

“Kagome… Do you realize…?”

Both strong hands, so gentle, pressing against that soft spot under her navel. His face was so full of concern and awe and she almost hated the word that she had to push out. Almost regretted the fact that she had to quiet that awe and deny him this.

“Miroku. I…” Against all of her rational judgment, she felt the prickle of tears in her eyes.

“Oh, Kagome… I’m sorry. I’m sorry. I shouldn’t… we haven’t even talked about…

But her hand covered his mouth,

“I can’t, Miroku.” She rushed ahead as his brow furrowed in confusion. “I mean, I can. Just not _right now._ ” He turned his head, freeing his mouth from her hand.

“What do you mean?”

“Medicine. From…” Again she hesitated, waving her hand in the air.

“From home?”

“I… From… the other side of the well.” Her nose crinkled at the oddness of the description. “The future.” _Not_ any less odd. “Uh. From… _there._ But _this_ is home, Miroku. _You._ Here _With you._ ”

Miroku’s eyes closed and he smiled at her words.

“Come here.” So she did, laying back down on his chest as he hugged her so tightly. “Not that I’m complaining, but don’t you think this is all going awfully fast?”

“Not fast when it’s so right.” She mumbled against him.

Kagome giggled in surprise when he lifted his hips and she bounced in his lap.

“Up! Up you go, now.”

“Don’t wanna. Comfy. Happy. Love you.”

He tightened his arms around her again for a moment.

“And I love you, but you do need to move.”

He laughed heartily at her whine.

“Noooo.”

“Yeees.”

“Nu-uh!” She shook her head against him, failing to suppress her own laughter.

His hands left their place around her and she whimpered. Protested again when her pushed himself and her atop him upward, sitting with her in his lap, clinging to him with her arms around his neck and legs around his waist.

“Still not moving!”

He just chuckled and twisted them around. Laughed outright as he knelt on hands and knees over her and she clung tighter, just hanging there without him supporting her.

He sat up again and stood, struggling a little to pull them both from the floor. Wrapped his arms under her bottocks, lacing his fingers together to hold her weight, and moved over to the stairs that led into the water. The ones that they hadn’t had a chance to use earlier.

The sight of their clothes strewn around and his sandals floating in the water both amused him and made him thankful for the yukata that most communal bath houses provided. The shock of the cool water on her skin finally dislodged Kagome from him and she put her feet under her, standing there with her arms wrapped around her middle, exaggerating mighty shivers.

Miroku just kept on smiling and walked backward into the water with one hand held out to her.

“Come on, beautiful. As much as I love the thought of you wanting to keep me inside of you, everyone else who lives here is youkai.” He waggled his eyebrows at her. “Unless, of course, you _want_ them to smell everything we’ve just done together?”

Kagome waded quickly over to him.

“I’m not sure if I’m disappointed or not, now.” He said.

Kagome laughed and shoved at his chest with a fake glare.

Miroku took her Kagome’s hand and led them over to the dividing wall where her plastic bottle was perched. Her eyes weren’t following their progression, though. She pointed off behind him instead.

“Miroku!” Her hand covered her smile. “Your shoes!”

“Shh! They look so peaceful floating there. So relaxed.”

Kagome rolled her eyes and moved through the water, plucking them out of the water and tossing them over to the floor on the far side of the bathing pool.

Miroku couldn’t stop smiling through it all and was gratified to see that Kagome was the same. He grabbed the bottle and went to her, wrapping his arms around her from behind, one hand holding the bottle of soap to her abdomen and the other slipping down between her legs.

Her hand rested on his wrist ad he rubbed her softly.

“You’re insatiable!”

“Hmm. I am. But that’s not what I’m doing.” He shook off her wrist, covering her hand with his and pulling it down to where he had been moments ago. “Feel?”

It was slick, even in the water; slippery. It brought a blush to her cheeks, reminded her of the passion they had just shared. Touching herself like this in front of him, _because he had guided her there_ , embarrassed and exhilarated her. Their fingers worked together to clean their mixed essence from her.

Miroku poured some of her soap into his palm in front of her and then let go of the bottle, allowing it to float there in the water until Kagome confiscated it.

She started as she felt his hands begin working the soap into her hair.

“What are you doing?”

“Washing you.”

It just made her blush more. It felt just as intimate, if not more, than having him bring her so much release. He pulled her head back and worked the soap into a lather, holding his hand out for more and spreading it over her neck, shoulders, and chest when she complied.

Miroku cupped both of her breasts, making her sigh in contentment as he continues to clean her. He lifted her bridal style and carried her to the wall, setting her on the little ledge there, continuing until she was covered head to toe in a white layer of bubbles.

Kagome grinned and hopped down, plunging under the water to rinse all of it away. She surfaced to see him already slathering the soap over himself.

Miroku watched as she made her way over to the stairs and climbed out. He ducked under the water himself and smiled when he made his way out of the water and to the towel she held out for him. He found it both erotic and endearing when she held out the yukata, still unclothed herself, obviously wanting to help him shrug into it. Something about the sight of her closing the thing, wrapping the obi around his waist and tying it for him made him stand half-erect again.

His hand between her shoulder blades brought her close and he leaned over to steal a last taste of her right breast. She was pliant against him, making him want to take her again right there.He let her go when she stepped away to put on her own yukata.

They shot each other heated, knowing looks as they went about gathering their wet attire.


	22. Ruin

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Posted 1.28.2020

Paradigm Shift

Chapter Twenty-two : Ruin

… … …

Somehow, the light of day seemed to make it all seem so much worse. Too many had fallen in this battle. Far too many. Twisted remains and scattered _fragments_ of his loyal fighters littered the ground.

The sight of it was horrific. It wrapped him in the sense of his own failure. Tore at him.

The smell of it was nearly impossible to bear.

They had all been too arrogant, too used to being undefeated. Too confident that they could overcome any foe, any army, any threat to the west. Too sure of their victory… and they had underestimated the sheer numbers of their enemies. Had underestimated Naraku’s cunning.

They had been too arrogant.

He had been too arrogant.

The Western Hall was taken.

“Your impenetrable fortress has fallen, _Lord_ Sesshomaru.” The humor danced in Naraku’s eyes. Frozen fire; the bloody hue of his eyes was fitting. “Your loyal soldiers lay dead at your feet.” Naraku took leisurely stepped across the gore of the massacre, making his way toward Sesshomaru from the other side of the destruction. He tauntingly threw his arms wide, taking a deep breath. “How sweet the smell of victory is. This aroma of death. Although, I suppose you appreciate it much less than I, seeing as this is the stench of your own defeat.”

Naraku’s malicious laughter rang in the air. It was chilling in his passion for torment. This is what he reveled in. He adored seeing Sesshomaru brought so low. This was an absolute joy. This sight of the great dog demon, respected and feared by so many, here at his feet; injured and snarling and utterly at his tender mercy.

“I knew that I would one day have you, Sesshomaru. How the mighty do fall.”

Sesshomaru, brought to one knee with the blood of his allies and enemies alike seeping into his hakama, acidic poison dripping from his claws and into the gore-soaked earth beneath his hand, crimson eyes glaring and a vicious snarl making its way through his bared, half transformed, rows of pointed fangs, could do nothing- _nothing_ to this abomination before him.

Without a thought to his injuries, Sesshomaru leapt over the remaining space between himself and Naraku, swiping his deadly claws through the form and snapping his jaws around the other’s throat.

To no avail.

The form simply dispersed in a cloud of black smoke, reforming seconds later into Naraku’s visage; laughing that cruel laugh.

“Surely by now you don’t think me so foolish as to put myself before you. Even injured as you are. What would be the point of it? There is no need for me to be present, personally.” Naraku gestured behind himself, calling the puppet that lurked in the shadows at the edge of the slaughter near. “After all, you were so easily defeated.”

The white-clad mockery drew near. It held a circular mirror before it.

“See your _kin_ , Sesshomaru. Such a _disgrace_ to your lineage he is. How embarrassing for you.”

Colors swirled about in the mirror, eventually settling into the image of a blood-lust crazed Inuyasha. Sesshomaru stood as his own blood seeped into his hankimono from the wounds he bore. He watched as Inuyasha ripped through the flesh of enemy and innocent; indiscriminately.

“How beautiful it is. If he could be leashed I might have considered bringing him into my own ranks. Ah. What pleasure it gives me to see him so uninhibited. It almost allows me to forget my hatred for him.”

In the mirror, Sesshomaru watched as Kouga engaged Inuyasha. It didn’t last long. The taijiya called out to him; alternately begging the wolf prince to not harm Inuyasha and calling to Inuyasha in vain; pleading for him to stop, to reclaim the Tetsusagia.

Sesshomaru’s red eyes widened in fury and disbelief. How stupid could these fools be; separating his unstable half-brother from their father’s fang? He growled loudly at the sight of the taijiya grasping the sword.

He could not tear his gaze from the scene playing out in the mirror. She would not be able to stop the attack coming her way. She was too focused on Inuyasha. Too occupied by _her friend_ to be aware of her surroundings. Too consumed with swinging her great boomerang in calculated non-attacks. Trying to prevent Inuyasha from advancing on the terrified villagers. Trying to redirect him toward Naraku’s overwhelming swarm of low-level youkai.

It caught Sango totally by surprise. There was a scream of pain ripped from her throat as a massive snake plunged its fangs into her thigh, no doubt filling her veins with its venom. Her curved bone weapon fell to the ground near her as her knees hit the ground. The snake went in for another strike, but was slain before it could further damage her as Kouga tore its head from its body.

The damage was already done.

Even if Sango managed to survive the blow she had been dealt, Tetsusaiga had fallen from her grip as she lost consciousness. Though she had been gathered into Kouga’s arms and taken out of the range of the mirror’s sight; Tetsusaiga had been claimed.

The foolish hanyou had given his trust too easily. The undead miko should never have been allowed to wander the land of the living for so long. Her face was blank, cold, emotionless as she was carried away by her shinidamachu.

“What a wonderous ally Kikyo has been. Anything to destroy the one whom she despises so. What is left of Inuyasha will ravage the lands without your father’s treasured fang. He will not maim. He will only bring death and fire to anyone and anything in his path.” The images swirled on the mirror’s surface again, settling into Sesshomaru’s own face once again. “And it will be known that _your_ blood, _your_ line has no honor.”

The Mirror was held above the puppet’s head and carried away by a saimyosho. The pelt crumpled to the ground, empty; leaving behind a wooden doll wrapped in black hair and the false Naraku dissipated into black smoke once again, carried away on a breeze.

… … …

“I should have known that Naraku would refuse to come to me himself.”

Kagura scoffed at the words that Kikyo spoke.

“Naraku cares for no one. Not even you, priestess. Why would he bother to retrieve the sword from you when he can just send one of us?”

Kagura ripped the Tetsusaiga from Kikyo’s hand, hissing as her hand and arm were burned painfully. She dropped it on the giant leaf that hovered at her side. She wouldn’t let it show that she was unnerved by the other woman. She was unnatural and it grated on the wind wielder. Kagura was of the wind; a force of nature itself. That something so far from natural stood so near her made Kagura’s skin crawl in repulsion.

Her face contorted with disgust and her eyes widened as she watched Kikyo’s retreating back double over with a shrill scream. She climbed into her leaf and rose into the air as the screams continued, cringing away from the fang at her side.

White orbs began to pour from the golem below and Kagura watched in horrified silence as Kikyo reached out to them. That scream kept on. The _mockery_ of a woman below didn’t even need to draw a breath. More emotion than she had ever witnessed from Kikyo was written in the pale clay face. She thought it would have made her less disgusting, but the fear and desperation on Kikyo’s face and the unearthly, tortured, unending screech was so much worse.

Kagura hovered high above, watching as the white orbs fled from Kikyo and she practically _melted_ into a mound of mud and cloth. She shouldn’t be surprised that Naraku would destroy her. He destroyed everything. Everyone. Would destroy her soon enough. She welcomed it.

… … …

Kouga skid to a stop at the edge of the purity that now protected Edo. He stared down into the face of the woman in his arms. She needed help badly. She was fading even as he watched. He had to get her to the old miko in the village. He didn’t have time to search for a different priestess or healer. He wouldn’t even know where to look.

Blue eyes scanned around him. He knew he wouldn’t find anyone nearby to carry a message to Kaede. Even if there did happen to be someone nearby, what then? Any youkai would be destroyed trying to pass over the land. Any human wouldn’t be fast enough.

Sango spasmed against his chest. This was taking too long. He had to do something. His mind raced through his options, but there weren’t many plausible paths that he could follow.

His eyes hardened and his shoulders tensed. He was fast. He was powerful.

Kouga walked backward, away from the edge of the purity. He could do this. Kaede wouldn’t need him to stay and explain. She was experienced. She would know how to heal Sango.

In and out. Fast. Then he could lick his wounds and return to the west. Leave the neutral lands and find Sesshomaru. He had to warn him that the eastern lord had allied with Naraku. Had to warn the west… his tribe.

In and out. Fast.

He took a deep breath and bent his knees. Flared his jaki around himself and Sango.

He could do this.

And he was gone in a whirlwind of dry dirt.

… … …

Rin clutched Shippou in her arms, tears running down her dirty cheeks. At her back, the dead body of one of Lord Sesshomaru’s guards was hunched over, leaning against the trunk of a tree.

He had gotten them out of the Western Hall. Through the passages- the ones that were secret.

Barely.

They had tried so hard to help him once they stopped. Shippou had ripped long strips from the guard’s silk haori. He had used his foxfire to try and stop the flow of blood from the guard’s wounds. Rin had tried to bandage the wounds. None of it helped.

“Lord Sesshomaru will come. He will.” She cried into Shippou’s red hair.

Shippou’s eyes were hard. Harder than a child’s eyes should be. Then again, he had lived much longer than Rin, despite his appearance. Youkai aged much slower than humans, after all. He had seen carnage before. He had. When his father had been killed, he’d seen it. He’d seem Inuyasha and Kagome and the others in battle. This was so much more than he had ever seen though. He hoped that Lord Sesshomaru would find them, he did, but he was unsure.

“We can’t stay here, Rin. They’ll find us. We’re too close.”

“He’ll come! He will!”

Shippou pushed against the girl, trying not to hurt her but needing to get free.

“Rin! We can’t stay here!”

“No! We have to wait for Lord Sesshomaru! He told me to wait for him if I ever got lost!”

“We’re not lost, Rin! We have to go!”

Shippou didn’t know what to do. He didn’t know where Lord Sesshomaru was. He didn’t know where Kagome was. He didn’t know where Inuyasha was. Even if he got Rin to agree to leave the west… he couldn’t leave his mushrooms for Lord Sesshomaru. Even if he _could_ come. They couldn’t risk being followed by the youkai that had invaded the Western Hall. They were lucky that the guard had even thought to take them through the passages.

His own eyes began to fill with tears. What were they going to do?

… … …

Everyone at Atsuta shrine stared into the west. The howl could be heard even there. It pierced the air and walls.

Nozomi stood from the table; all eyes on the fierce lines of her posture. They knew what the sound was. They all knew.

Miroku and Kagome looked around at the youkai that were sat around them, their lunch forgotten as they stood with the rest.

“Lord Sesshomaru is near. He calls for us. He calls for aid. ” Nozomi growled.

… … …

Narrowed emerald eyes pinned the messenger to the floor where he knelt. The scroll in his hand crumpled as he tightened his hand into a fist. The borders of the southern isles had not been threatened in centuries. He would have to send reinforcements to the edges of his islands to protect his people.

It wouldn’t be enough. They would be spread too thin. He’d had no need for a large military force for too long. He had grown complacent in peace with the west. He had not thought that his friend could be overcome.

His tails bristled and flipped in agitation. He shook his mass of wild obsidian hair from his face and turned to the window.

“And so the darkness spreads.”

… … …

“Lord Sesshomaru!”

Rin took off as quick as she could into the trees. The wrong way. Back toward the Western Hall that they had just escaped. She knew the howl could only have been him. No other could have a voice so fearsome that it would travel so far. She had to get to him.

Shippou took off after her, terrified and hopeful.

… … …

Sesshomaru’s massive paw crushed another eastern jacana youkai soldier underfoot. Traitorous birds.

His massive snout scented the area. He must retrieve the pups. They had scattered, fled. Taken away by the guards, away from the bloodshed.

As they should be.

He howled again in rage, snapping his jaws around another treacherous bird, shaking his maw and ripping it in two from the combination of his fangs and the force of his shaking. He let the top half of the disgusting thing roll from his tongue.

Jaki flared around his massive beast form as he shot into the sky, scanning the area around the hall. They were too spread out.

… … …

Nozomi ran loped down the side of the mountain on four legs, the rest of Atsuta’s fighting forces following in her wake. She knew what this meant. She had heard this call before, many many years past when Sesshomaru’s father fought against Lord Ryuukotsusei.

Her eyes bled crimson as she ran, dread filling her gut. Never had she thought that she would relive the fall of the west. Lord Sesshomaru had retaken his father’s lands and reclaimed them from the clutches of the northern dragons long ago.

She couldn’t help the flood of rage at the thought that it had been a mortal woman to bring the downfall of her previous lord, and here they were; with another mortal woman close to their Lord- and the west had fallen again.

Her lips pulled back as she bared her fangs when she felt the flare of reiki behind her. Would they forever be cursed by the presence of these mortals?

… … …

Yellow plumes rose from smooth black feathers as they raised their weapons. This human bred spawn of the inuyoukai knew no pain. He had decimated the few soldiers that Lord Yokuto had sent to take him down. There had been a dozen of them. Only four remained.

They took to the air, watching in savage satisfaction as he crossed the border and stepped onto northern soil. They may not have been able to kill him or contain him but he was no longer their problem. Let the dragons deal with the hanyou beast.

… … …

Kouga stood in Kaede’s home in stunned silence, rigid, looking down at the old woman as she tended to Sango.

“How is it that ye are unharmed?”

Kouga looked down at his hands. They were stained with dried blood. His own. That of Inuyasha and Sango. The weak youkai masses that he had slain in battle. Yet even his wounds from the battle had been healed in an instant.

As soon as he stepped into the borders of the sacred grounds.

There had been pain. Stinging and burning as his wounds knitted together in seconds. Wounds deep enough that he wouldn’t have healed for days. And he passed in a blur over the distance between the border and the village. Unharmed. Refreshed. Only the grime and blood giving evidence of the battle that he had escaped with the injured woman.

“I… don’t know.”

Kaede twisted the wooden dowel in the fabric another two turns, tightening the tourniquet.

“Come here. Hold this steady. I must bleed the venom from her wound and she cannot afford to lose much more blood.”

Kouga stepped over Kaede’s hunched form, crouching to do as he was told. Kaede reached toward the knife she used primarily for preparing herbal pastes and poultices. It was dull, but she had no other. Her hand stilled and she looked over her shoulder, hesitant, as Kouga spoke.

“Let me. I can tell that thing won’t be much help.”

Kouga flicked as much dirt as he could from under the claw of his left thumb and rubbed it around on his pelt to try to get the surface as clean as possible. He set his face, determined, and reached to Sango’s leg, slicing into her deeply from one large hole to the other; where the snake had pierced her.

“Thank ye, Kouga.”

Kaede wrapped her hands around Sango’s ankle and squeezed, pushing her hands along the leg, watching tainted blood seep from the wound.

“Push it down from the top, Kouga. She needs to be rid of it.”

So Kouga kept his grip on the wooden dowel and pushed down on Sango’s thigh with his free hand as Kaede continued pressing the blood and venom upward. Their hands finally rested around the wound, his above and hers below, and they pressed her leg into the dirt floor of the hut, watching with relief as the blood began to flow untainted.

“She will not recover quickly. Whatever vemon that seeped through the rest of her body must run its course. She will be weak from both that and the loss of so much blood.” Kaede stood and retrieved a heavy needle and course thread from beside her herbs. “Keep tight on that wrapping until I close her leg, Kouga.”

He nodded, turning to look down at Sango’s face. The woman was strong. Still, he was glad that she slept for this.

… … …

Kagome’s knuckles were white and her legs ached from gripping the fur on Heiji’s back as he followed after Nozomi hastily. She buried her face down into his brown fur to protect her eyes from the blasting air that stung them at this speed, and her face from the whipping brush. She bled from shallow scratches caused by the plant life in the forest. Her clothes had been torn in places, caught here and there by branches or thorns.

She didn’t care. Her heart pounded with anxiety. She hoped against everything that Sesshomaru was alright.

Heiji had snatched her off her feet and flung her onto his back as they had all bolted into the west from Atsuta Shrine. All of the youkai had shifted into their beast forms to lessen the time it would take to reach Sesshomaru.

She could feel the pulse of Miroku’s reiki behind her somewhere and it was comforting, but she swallowed thickly nonetheless.

… … …

The huge dog dove to the closest group of pups that he could sense, light bursting around him as he plummeted toward the ground.

His black boots hit the ground between the trees and he strode up to the guard standing protectively in front of the three fearful pups. He clapped his hand to the man’s shoulder and squeezed, relaying his approval through his eyes with a look.

“Find as many others as you can. We must gather them and bring them out of harm’s way.”

The guard nodded, spoke softly.

“How many of their parents are left?”

Sesshomaru looked down at the crying pups. His hand left the guard’s shoulder and he crouched to scoop up the children. He let his jaki gather under his feet as he held the last of the noble lines close to his chest. He didn’t look at the guard as he rose upward, intent on finding any others that he could.

“None. Find any you can. Follow the eastern road to the border. I will find you.”

The guard clenched his jaw and nodded, bounding off in the opposite direction as Sesshomaru sped away through the air.

… … …

Kaede wiped her hands on an already much-stained scrap of cloth, head hung low.

“Will she be okay? Kouga asked.

“If she can last through the night and into morning, she will recover.” Kaede dipped the fabric into the pail of water and wrung the excess out, turning to hand it to Kouga.

“…Thanks…”

Kaede glanced down at the cloth as she pressed it into Kouga’s rough palm. She thought nothing of it when she tightened her hand on Kouga’s fingers and his claws pierced her palm in her haste. Her other hand wrapped around his forearm, just above his wrist.

“What be this mark!?” Her tone was insistent.

Kouga looked down at his wrist where the little star he had noticed a few days ago was sparkling dimly with a pink glow. His eyes widened and he leaned down to look more closely at it.

“I’m not sure. It showed up a while back. It didn’t hurt or anything. Figured it was a scar or something.”

Kaede ran her finger over the little star.

“This be Kagome’s reiki. Mayhap this is why ye are able to walk on this land.”

Kaede and Kouga’s eyes met in astonishment.

… … …

Miroku dropped from atop Kirara’s back as Nozomi and Heiji ground to a halt just past the treeline. He barely noticed Kagome slide from Heiji’s back as he looked out over the grounds around the Western Hall in mortification. He felt Kagome’s hand on his back as she took in the sight too.

They couldn’t tear their eyes away from it all until they heard Nozomi’s voice shouting behind them.

“Tatsuo! Head that way! You know what to do! Find them and follow the eastern road!” Nozomi pointed to three other youkai, telling them to follow Tatsuo.

As the rest of the youkai caught up to them, Nozomi directed them in a similar fashion. When they were all headed in different directions to follow Nozomi’s directions, she finally turned back to Miroku and Kagome. They recoiled at the snarl she gave them and the anger in her eyes.

“This is not their doing, Nozomi.” Heiji said, taking a step in front of Miroku and Kagome.

Miroku blanched at his words. Nozomi was blaming _them_ for this chaos? **_Why!?_**

Kagome felt numb. She looked over her shoulder, half expecting to see pristine walls and lush grass filled with summer flowers behind her. It hadn’t changed, though. Nozomi, Heiji and Miroku barely registered as she tried to remember how to breathe.

… … …

Sesshomaru landed again, the three pups still crying and still held tight to the broken pieces of armor on his chest.

“Tatsuo.”

The red wolf was consumed in swirling jaki as she shifted back into her normal form and hurried to stand before her lord.

“Nozomi is here?”

“Yes. She sent us and the others to find any pups that got away.”

Sesshomaru lowered the children into her waiting arms.

“Good. What of the miko and the monk?”

Tatsuo nodded.

“With Nozomi and Heiji at the eastern guard tower.”

Sesshomaru nodded to her, watching as she held the pups close and took off in the direction of the eastern road, three other inu close behind her.

He took to the sky again, heading toward the eastern guard tower and Nozomi. The familiar auras washed over his senses as he approached.

“Sesshomaru!” Kagome yelled as the ball of light expanded and faded to reveal the taiyoukai. She ran to him but stopped short as she took in his appearance with a gasp; covering her mouth with her hands.

Sesshomaru didn’t look at Kagome, but held his bloodied and dirtied hand out to her as he addressed Nozomi.

“How many?”

“We brought as many as we could without leaving the shrine unguarded. Nine groups of four.” She told him.

Heiji stepped forward and Sesshomaru’s eyes met his.

“Take the southeast side.” Sesshomaru told him.

Heiji turned and ran off without hesitation. Sesshomaru turned back to Nozomi.

“The northeast side, Nozomi. We cannot allow any of them to follow us with the pups.”

Nozomi’s jaki flashed and she was a gray wolf again, heading off in the opposite direction.

Kagome was frozen in place, staring at the blood and dirt and _other_ things coating Sesshomaru’s skin and clothes. Even his hair was streaked through with _things_ and his chest plate was nearly non-existent.

Sesshomaru opened and closed his hand, beckoning Kagome to him again. She stumbled toward him, her hand hovering uncertainly over his.

“Travel that way, Monk. You will come upon a wide road; the eastern road. It leads toward Atsuta Shrine. The children of the western nobility that have managed to escape will be brought there. Nozomi and Heiji will pick off any scouts that intend to follow. Aid in the defense of the pups as they travel. We will meet with you before nightfall.”

Miroku’s eyes dropped to Kagome at Sesshomaru’s side.

Sesshomaru looked down at Kagome as well. The blood and grime that covered him was smearing across her own clothes and arms. She was crying. There was something more, though. He leaned down and took a long inhale near her neck. He looked up with narrowed eyes at Miroku.

“We will discuss this later.” He said.

Kagome looked back at Miroku. Her world had become surreal again. Miroku was back in his full monk robes, Sesshomaru was injured and covered in death, the grounds around them were nothing more than a grotesque graveyard. Her free hand reached out to Miroku.

He closed the distance between them, Sesshomaru’s reservations be damned, and kissed Kagome roughly.

“Don’t leave Lord Sesshomaru’s side, Kagome. I’ll see you at Atsuta Shrine when you get there. I’ll be waiting for you.”

He kissed her again, reluctant to leave even as he tore himself away and climbed back onto Kirara to head in the direction that Sesshomaru had indicated.

She couldn’t make any sound leave her throat, a dry, silent heave making her shoulders hunch over as she covered her mouth with her free hand. She could still feel his lips on hers and was near panic now. Everything was happening so fast and she still wasn’t sure what was going on.

Kagome turned back to Sesshomaru, mouth still covered by her hand, horror and fear in her eyes; coloring her scent.

“We will search for any surviving fallen, Kagome. Kaede has taught you well and any who can be saved will need to be tended. I must find any that the Tensaiga will allow me to return to us.” Sesshomaru’s jaki gathered under their feet. “Kagome.” He pulled her closer, disregarding the transfer of gore from him to her. “Kagome! I need you to focus.”

Kagome blinked and shook her head. When she spoke, her voice wavered.

“I’ll do what I can.”

… … …

Even with his speed, even if he didn’t allow himself any rest, it would take Kouga two days or more to reach the western border of the neutral lands. Two or more days to reach his wolves. Three days to reach Lord Sesshomaru at the Western Hall.

Kouga pushed himself harder, faster. He had to get there as soon as he could. Who knew how much destruction Inuyasha could cause in three days?

Damn Naraku. Damn him.

… … …

As the cluster of inuyoukai and Atsuta residents came into view, Miroku tried his best to reassure himself that the kiss he had shared with Kagome would not be their last. He clung to his wavering faith in Sesshomaru’s power and strength. Clung to his faith in Kagome’s ever-growing abilities. Did his best to focus.

He jumped off of Kirara’s back as she touched the ground, surveying the huddled inu children and their watchers. There were more youkai than just the ones from Atsuta. Survivors, he assumed.

“Lord Sesshomaru wants us to begin heading toward the shrine. He will join us there by nightfall.”

Tatsuo stepped out of the throng,

“How fast can that neko fly?” She demanded.

Miroku glanced back at Kirara. If Tatsuo was suggesting what he though she might be, it was a good idea.

“Fast enough. She could carry five or six and one adult.”

“If she can take six, that leaves up with sixteen.”

Miroku nodded.

“Nozomi and Heiji are making sure we’re not followed. We should make haste.”

Tatsuo grabbed up the nearest pup and unceremoniously deposited the girl on Kirara’s back.

… … …

If she could have smiled in this form, she would have. It had been a long time since she had felt so savage. Nozomi’s teeth ripped through the throat of an eastern soldier. Traitors. As the bird fell to the ground, she shook her head and gnawed at the mass of bloody flesh and feathers.

… … …

Heiji stood his ground, standing on two huge back paws as two jacana and one snake closed in on him from three sides. He growled and snapped his jaws. The snake lunged, but it was no match for him. His claws tore through its scales, severing the thing’s head. As his hand followed through in the swipe he changed forms without a thought, swiveling on one foot and landing a kick to one of the birds’ head; sending the traitor to the ground.

… … …

Kagome’s stomach did flips as Sesshomaru carried her over the bodies strewn around the grounds. The moved quickly so they wouldn’t be seen; staying to the outer edges of the battlefield so they wouldn’t be noticed.

They made two passes around the area that they could safely scour. No survivors. No responses from Tensaiga.

She tightened her left arm around Sesshomaru’s. He held her tight against his chest. The fragments dug into her back and shoulders but she paid no attention to it. Her right hand clenched at the fabric over her stomach, doing her best to keep from vomiting.

Finally, they moved into the treeline and away from the horror.

“Without wounded to tend to, we will head toward the wolf dens. From there, I will take you to Atsuta and leave to seek out the bear tribes and then head to the coast. They are not far.”

Kagome turned around in Sesshomaru’s grasp, wrapping her arms around his waist and resting her cheek against his arm; trying not to think about the things that were smearing into her skin.


	23. Aftermath

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Posted 1.28.2020  
> Unedited

Paradigm Shift

Chapter Twenty-three: Aftermath

… … …

Sesshomaru had been right. The wolf dens were just a little farther than Atsuta shrine, albeit in a different direction. The dens were a series of caves that ran along the opposite side of the same mountain range that Atsuta occupied. It took maybe two hours to reach them.

Kagome could see wolves, in both forms, gathering along the range at the mouths of their dens. They watched as she and Sesshomaru approached, some climbing or jumping along the face of the rock toward the largest opening in the center of the caves.

Kagome stumbled a little as Sesshomaru released her when they landed inside the entrance of the cave. The wolves all moved to the sides of the cavern, parting to allow Sesshomaru to pass through them.

Kagome could make out the figure of a man toward the back of the cave. Sesshomaru only took a few steps toward the man, waiting until he moved forward and came to them instead. As he came closer and stepped into the light, Kagome took in how similar he was to Kouga. He had long dark hair. Longer than Kouga’s and in a braid down his back instead of in a ponytail. The same light blue eyes. Very similar in height. This man could have been Kouga’s older brother.

“Prince Kazuo.” Sesshomaru nodded to the man.

So _this_ was the western wolf prince. The one that Kouga had merged his own tribe into. Kagome looked around at the wolves lining the walls. There _were_ a few familiar faces. A couple of the wolved even waved at her.

“Lord Sesshomaru. The worst has come to pass, then.”

Kagome started as Kazuo spoke. Even the man’s voice was similar to Kouga’s, maybe just a little deeper and a little more…wolfy.

“Indeed. The preparations have been finished?”

Kazuo nodded to Sesshomaru.

“They have.” He gestured to one of the many openings in the back of the cave. “Come. Allow me to show you the maps.”

Sesshomaru nodded and began to follow Kazuo deeper into the caves. His eyes didn’t leave the wolf prince’s back as he walked.

“This woman is the Miko, Kagome. She has earned a place in my house and you will treat her as such.”

Kazuo’s chuckle at Sesshomaru’s words did nothing to make her feel better.

Kagome looked around at the wolves nervously. Sesshomaru was going to _leave_ her here? She watched in apprehension as the two powerful youkai disappeared through the dark opening and turned in a circle with a forced smile.

“Uh… hi…”

She just wanted to collapse and process the whole day. First her _summoning_ the jewel shards, mixing her reiki and _aura_ with Miroku’s, getting her _soul_ back… a blush rose across her cheeks as she remembered the bath house and everything that happened after leaving Nozomi’s cottage. Then the rush to answer Sesshomaru’s call and the _carnage_.

It had been a long day.

Kagome dropped her hand back to her side and closed her eyes.

She about jumped out of her skin as a familiar shout echoed through the cavern. She wasn’t sure how many more surprises she could take today.

“SIS!” Twin voices yelled.

And she was being fussed at by two, thankfully, familiar faces.

“Ginta! Hakkaku!”

“We’d hug you, sis, but…” Ginta pointed at Kagome’s clothes.

“You okay? Is any of this yours?” Hakkaku picked at the stained clothes and sniffed at her.

“I’m okay, guys. Just a few scratches. I didn’t even get to Sessh-“ She coughed. “Ahem… Lord Sesshomaru until after most of it was over.”

Some of the other wolves had started moving slowly closer to the three of them, probably curious, but most of them had wandered off.

“Hey! Miyu!” Ginta walked over to one of the wolves that hadn’t retreated. “You got any extra pelts that Kagome can borrow?”

The female wolf came up to stand by Ginta, giving Kagome a look from head to toe and rubbing her head under Ginta’s chin.

“Maybe. She’s kinda tiny.”

Kagome looked chagrined at the comment.

“I’d really appreciate it.”

“Well. If I don’t have anything that fits you, we could trade something for a new pelt and make you something. Wouldn’t have to be a big one or nothing.” Miyu said. “First lets go check me and Ginta’s place.”

Kagome found herself being led away down one of the many off-shoots from the main cavern; Ginta and Hakkaku following behind.

“Hey guys? Is Kouga here?”

“We thought he was with you. Helping Lord Sesshomaru or something.”

Kagome frowned. Hopefully, Kouga and the others were okay. _The others_! How could she have forgotten!? Rin! Shippou!

“I have to see Sesshomaru! _Now_!” She screamed, digging her heels in and trying to wrench her hand out oh Miyu’s grasp.

“Ah, That’s probably not a good idea while he’s with prince Kazuo, Kagome.” Hakkaku said, watching her struggle.

“I have to! The kids! Rin! Shippou! They were at the Western Hall!”

Miyu let her go. Cubs?

Kagome took off back down the passage, heading back the way they had come.

Ginta, Hakkaku, and Miyu all watched her go.

Kagome almost fell on her face as she made it into the main cavern and turned to head into the passage that Kazuo and Sesshomaru had gone down. _How_ could she have forgotten? There was no excuse. They were _hers_.

The passage wasn’t a long one, after only a few feet she could see light ahead.

“Sesshomaru!” She yelled.

Later, she would be thankful that he had already removed the broken armor because she didn’t slow as he came into view at the end of the passage. She crashed into him, wrapping her arms around him with tears streaming down her face.

“Sesshomaru! Rin! Shippou!”

Sesshomaru stepped himself and Kagome a little further from the small fire next to them before Kagome caught them on fire.

Kazuo looked on in curiosity, tilting his head to the side as he observed the tiny human that had attached herself to the inuyoukai.

“This is your powerful miko?” He put one hand on the wide, flat, ledge behind him. Scrolls were scattered across the surface, a few of them unfurled and held open by stones.

Sesshomaru looked out of the corner of his eye at Kazuo and rested his hand on the top of Kagome’s head.

“She is powerful, I assure you. Especially when she is emotional. Quiet.”

He stroked Kagome’s hair a few times and then reached around to tug one of her arms from around him.

“Kagome. Calm yourself. You have been training for barely two days and we are amid many youkai.”

Kazuo hissed as pink reiki began to seep from Kagome’s body and stung at his skin.

“Lord Sesshomaru. Respectfully, control her or remove her.”

Sesshomaru’s brows grew together as Kazuo began to growl in response to Kagome’s rising reiki. It wasn’t hurting him in the slightest. He grasped Kagome’s shoulder and shook her.

“Kagome!” He growled. “Calm yourself. Your kit and Rin will have been gathered with the others. We will see them after we leave here.”

And they would. _If_ they had made it out of the Western Hall before it had been taken.

Kagome sucked in huge gulps of air and they watched her reiki settle back into her skin and her tears taper off.

Kazuo raised a hand to his neck, feeling the burns that peppered his skin.

“I suppose you really are powerful, miko. That hurt.” He looked over Sesshomaru. While injured from the battle, the inuyoukai lord seemed untouched by the miko’s surge of power.

Kagome turned her face out of Sesshomaru’s chest and looked at Kazuo.

“I’m so sorry!” She said. “I… I still haven’t got the hang of controlling my reiki when I’m…”

“Crying?” Kazuo suggested.

“Mostly…”

“If you _can_ get a grip on your reiki, you’d be a pretty damn good friend to have.” He stuck a tanned hand out to her. “Prince Kazuo of the western wolves.” He cut his eyes to the left for a moment. Kagome took his hand, still not stepping away from Sesshomaru. “I suppose the western part isn’t really needed anymore though. Prince Kouga has brought the eastern tribes here, now. We lead together. For the most part.” Kazuo lifted Kagome’s hand to his lips but did a double-take before he kissed it. He decided to give Kagome a wide grin, instead. “Forgive me, I think I’ll wait until you bathe before trying to charm you.

All in all, Kazuo’s mannerisms made Kagome want to laugh. She didn’t. But she could have if she hadn’t been so distraught.

“I would appreciate being released, Kagome.”

“Oh!”

She let go of Sesshomaru’s waist and took a few steps backward. “Ow! Ow ow ow!”

Sesshomaru sighed and watched Kagome pat out the flames on her hakama.

“Clumsy girl.”

“Powerful _and_ entertaing. Quite the find, Sesshomaru.” Kazuo laughed.

Kagome blushed.

“Let her stay. Perhaps this will ease her fears.” Kazuo gestured Kagome closer.

She looked to Sesshomaru, stepping toward the other man when he didn’t say anything. She squeaked as Kazuo lifted her off her feet and planted her on the ledge, causing her to flatted a mound of rolled scrolls.

Sesshomaru sighed again and stepped to Kazuo’s side. All three of them turned to the map that was open on the flat stone ledge.

“As I said. This area here, near the center of the cave system, is where we have decided on. Everything has been taken care of; other than the barrier that will go up once the pups are here.”

“Acceptable.”

Kazuo snorted. He found Sesshomaru’s demeanor rather amusing most of the time.

“We’ll need nine to form the barrier. Here at each entrance from the outlying caverns. Preferably strong. It’s just not do-able to get a barrier up over the whole cave system. Too big. This is the biggest single cavern, and it’s a _bitch_ to get to.”

Kagome got the gist of their exchange, listening closely while trying to lean forward as much as she could off of the pile of scrolls.

“Provisions?”

“Taken care of. They’ll be set up for a couple weeks.”

Sesshomaru scowled at the map.

“That is not a very long window, Kazuo.”

“At least it’s something. It all depends on how many made it out. Could be shorter, could be longer. Any idea how many of yours are coming?”

Sesshomaru glanced at Kagome.

“We are unsure. They are traveling to Atsuta Shrine.” He reached out his arm and tapped a marked passage at the right edge of the map. “They will come through here.”

“When?”

“Tomorrow night.”

Kazuo rolled up the scroll and tossed it to the back of the ledge, turning around and leaning against the stone.

“Counting me and you, if Kouga shows up soon enough, that makes three. Do we have six others?”

“I will go to the bears tonight. Raiden and Yua will undoubtedly bring their clan’s young. The bears will fight.”

Kazou scratched his scruffy jawline with one claw and nodded.

“I have no doubts of that. The bears are fearsome. What of Tadaaki and Naiko?”

“I do not know. They may head to their kin in the southern isles or they may stand with the other clan here in the west.”

“Well, Raiden and Yua make us five.”

Sesshomaru plucked Kagome from the ledge where she looked utterly uncomfortable while she watched them talk. He set her on her feet and turned back to Kazuo.

“Either Heiji or Nozomi will escort the inu pups through the passages from Atsuta.”

“Alright. Six. Three more.”

“You are certain that prince Kouga will be here by the time the rest of the pups arrive?”

Kazuo frowned.

“He should be. You know how fast he is.”

“Kouga was with my other friends just east of Edo about a month ago.” Kagome interrupted in a soft voice.

The two men looked to her.

“Indeed he was. There is no guarantee that they remained that close to the neutral lands, though.” Sesshomaru told her.

“The… neutral lands?”

Kazuo prodded Kagome in the side with a clawed finger.

“You’re just full of surprises, little miko. Powerful, entertaining, _and_ well connected. Rather pretty too.” He leaned close to her, putting one hand on the wall behind her, above her head. “Perhaps I should just claim you for myself.”

Kazuo pulled away from Kagome at Sesshomaru’s low rumble.

“If Lord Sesshomaru would permit it, of course.”

Kagome’s blue eyes flicked between Kazuo and Sesshomaru in agitation.

“I’m not some bartered and traded _goods_ , you know!”

The two youkai smirked at her, making her cross her arms with a huff.

“So we are six.” Sesshomaru said

“Yeah. What about Mori?”

“My general perished in the battle.”

Kazuo’s eyes darkened and his lips drew into a tight line.

“He was a good fighter.”

“Indeed.”

Kagome fidgeted.

“How about the boars and the foxes? I get that they like to keep to themselves, but they might come. They are part of the west, after all. I can send out some of the wolves to head their way.”

Sesshomaru looked toward the ceiling of the little room, watching the smoke from the fire curl up and out through a crack in the rock.

“No. I shall go myself. If they do not join us in battle, perhaps they will come to aid in the barrier’s formation.”

“Let’s hope so.”

Kazuo pushed away from where he leaned on the ledge, snatching Kagome close to his side.

“Later, little miko.”

He laughed when Sesshomaru growled again.

The fire was put out and they made their way to the main cavern in silence. Ginta, Hakkaku, and Miyu, with a bundle of fur and leather in her arms, were waiting at the mouth od the passage. They bowed to Sesshomaru and Kazuo and Miyu grabbed Kagome’s wrist.

“Hey. One of the girls gave me this for you to change into…” Miyu told her.

Sesshomaru looked at her and then at Kagome.

“Quickly.”

Miyu smiled and whispered a quick thanks to him, dragging Kagome back off down the passage they had gone earlier. They stopped a little ways down and Miyu shook out the bundle, holding it up to Kagome.

“It should fit pretty good, actually. Here, get that crap off and let's get you dressed.”

Kagome smiled a little. She’d forgotten how rough around the edges and abrupt the wolves were. It was sort of comforting in a way; familiar. It made her miss Kouga.

Miyu helped peel the ruined silk away from her skin.

“Too bad you don’t have time to rinse off, though.” Miyu said. She turned Kagome around and gathered up her hair into a ponytail, tying it in place with a leather strap. “Here. Let me do that.” Miyu pulled the pelt from Kagome’s hands and flipped it inside-out, tugging on a few hidden straps inside.

Kagome stood there with her arms above her head when Miyu instructed, letting the woman wrap her in the pelt.

“Here. Hold this part while I tie these.”

Kagome nodded and did as she was told.

“Thanks for this, Miyu.”

“Nah. Don’t worry about it! My mate says you’re pack. We look after our own, you know. That crap had to be pretty uncomfortable. Can’t imagine how Lord Sesshomaru feels. He looks pretty rough.”

“Yeah. Believe it or not, everything on my clothes was just rubbed off from his.”

Miyo grinned up at Kagome as she tied the last closure on the side, under her arm.

“Pretty close, huh?”

“Not like that!” Kagome held out her hands in front of her until the pelt started slipping down. Miyu laughed at her and pulled it back up, drawing a flap of leather over Kagome’s shoulder and tying it to the front.

“Either way.” Miyu shrugged. “Can’t really see Lord Sesshomaru letting us dress him up in furs anyway,”

Kagome laughed at the image that conjured in her mind.

“Me either.”

“All done!” Miyu stepped back. “Whaddya think?”

Kagome looked down at herself. The pelt was a short dress, leather from the hips up and fur from the hips down. It barely covered her important parts, but at least it was better than the gore encrusted silk. She really couldn’t wait to see Rin and Shippou and get a bath.

“Thanks, Miyo.”

“No problem. Go on now, before your inu gets impatient.”

… … …

The water in the bath house was tinted pink by the time everyone had rinsed the battle away. The twenty-two inu children had been given beds in the Shrine’s sleeping quarters, and the surviving guards that had gotten them out of the Western Hall were gathered in the garden with Heiji.

Miroku stood among them all in silence. They all stood or sat, just watching the darkening sky, Watching for Sesshomaru.

 _‘and Kagome’_ Miroku thought.

The last vestiges of daylight had faded and it had gotten dark enough that most of Atsuta’s regular residents had headed off to bed themselves; heading back to their beds and sorting out who could share a night with who.

Miroku, Heiji, and the five guards who had survived from the Western Hall were the only ones who remained in the garden by the time Sesshomaru and Kagome finally arrived at the shrine.

With barely a thought to her furry dress, Miroku welcomed the armful of miko he suddenly found himself with. He felt like he could breathe again.

“ _Miroku._ ”

“I’m fine, Kagome.” He stepped back, holding her at arm’s length. “You are too, it seems.” Kagome tugged on the bottom of the little dress when Miroku smirked. “Where did _that_ come from?”

“Don’t even start! We went to see the wolf tribe before coming here.” Kagome looked off to the side. “There weren’t any survivors that we could find on the battlefield…”

“Ah. So Lord Sesshomaru took you along to recover the wounded.”

Kagome nodded slowly. She doubted the sight of that field would ever leave her. Even the thought of it made her stomach turn.

“There weren’t any. Tensaiga wouldn’t even respond to any of them.”

Miroku cupped Kagome’s cheeks in his hands and gave her a chaste kiss.

“You’ll be relieved to know that Shippou and Rin are sleeping soundly in our room.”

Kagome’s eyes lit up and Miroku found himself being led at a jog toward the sleeping quarters by the sleeve of his monsuke.

… … …

Nozomi ceased her furious pacing as the door to her cottage opened to admit Sesshomaru. She crossed her arms and stared at him as he calmly closed it behind himself.

“ _Your_ _miko_ has mated the other human, you know.”

Sesshomaru looked to the empty table behind Nozomi and took in the scattered mess all over the floor.

“I am aware. Did they use your table?”

Nozomi growled.

“Do not push me, Nozomi. You may have served my line for many years, but you know your place.”

Nozomi turned and stormed away from him, kicking away the fallen contents of her table without care. She sarcastically waved her arm at the head for Sesshomaru to sit and folded herself down at a side with her back toward him.

“ _This_ mess was indeed because of _Kagome_. Not for _that_ , though. Much has happened in two days, Sesshomaru.”

He walked calmly to the head of the table and looked down at Nozomi without sitting.

“Explain.”

She pushed her fingers into her hair.

“She is strong.”

“This is not unknown to me, Nozomi.”

She glared up at him.

“Stronger than she _should_ be. The training was difficult for her yesterday, but when she finally caught on… she learned quickly.”

“I fail to see where your concern lies.”

“There was an incident this morning.” Nozomi stood abruptly from the table and walked down a short hall, yelling over her shoulder as she went. “The monk is convinced that this _miko_ of yours somehow managed to connect their very soul’s energies together.”

“Oh?”

“He certainly believes so. The girl formed some sort of barrier around herself. We couldn’t near it. _He_ could though. Managed to actually go _through_ it.”

Sesshomaru lifted an eyebrow at the crashing and bumping sounds coming down the hall.

“She _floated_ the two of them into the air and there was a burst of reiki. It fanned out around them for… I don’t know how far, and then came back, dragging _Shikon shards into my Shrine with it._ ”

Nozomi finally emerged from the hall, thrusting a bundle of blue and white silk at Sesshomaru. A look of disdain crossed his face as he unfolded them.

“These are my father’s.” He said in a cold tone.

“They are. Change into them.” She pointed down the hall. “Unless you’d rather run about in _those_.”

Sesshomaru stared down at the hankimono and hakama in distaste.

“Sesshomaru!” Nozomi took a step toward him and pointed down the hall again. “That was _rhetorical._ ”

Nozomi blew out a frustrated puff of air as Sesshomaru moved down the hall to change, snarling the whole way. When he came back out, he was stiff and obviously uncomfortable and had retained his own long, blood-soaked, blue and yellow obi.

“Stubborn dog.”

“No need to degrade yourself, Nozomi.”

“I meant you! Just as hard-headed as your father!”

Sesshomaru stepped close and leaned his face near to Nozomi’s.

“I am _not_ my father.”

Nozomi bit her tongue to keep from retorting. Sesshomaru straightened himself and leveled an icy stare at her.

“What of the shards?”

“She… absorbed them. The monk went on about it for a while. Ask him.”

“I have seen Kagome lose control of her reiki before. If what you say is true, you should all be dead.”

Though he believed his words, Sesshomaru thought back to the wolf den and Kagome’s reiki washing over him; leaving him unharmed.

“There was something… odd about it. I spoke to the others, and they all agreed. They felt the burst. It didn’t feel like _purification_. It felt like it was… searching us.”

Sesshomaru strode to the door, pausing as he opened it.

“Interesting.” He walked out of the cottage. “Show me where the pups are.”

“Your curiosity is going to be your downfall one day, Sesshomaru.” Nozomi muttered under her breath. She did follow him, closing her door behind her.

… … …

Miroku leaned against the wall and watched Kagome watch the sleeping children on her futon. They were snuggled together adorably, and Kagome had curled herself up on the bare floor in front of them, running her hand softly over their faces every now and then. The three of them made quite a sight.

When he heard soft footfalls drawing near, he slipped out of the room and into the hallway. Nozomi and Sesshomaru were walking through the hall, opening each of the doors where the inu pups slept and looking them over before moving on.

When they reached him, Miroku opened the door for them and let them look in at Kagome, Rin and Shippou.

“This is the last of them, Sesshomaru. I’m sorry.”

“Twenty-two inu pups.”

Nozomi nodded at him.

“And these two.”

She watched his back for a moment before turning to Miroku.

“I shall take my leave of you for the night.” Nozomi bowed and left the room, heading back down the hallway and out of sight.

Miroku closed the door and turned back around. He was met with the sight of Sesshomaru crouching down by Kagome’s head.

“Kagome. Come. You must bathe.”

She shook her head mutely, watching Rin and Shippou still.

“And if they wake to see you covered in blood and dirt?”

Her blue eyes looked up to his.

“You’re right.” She whispered. You should too. Your hair is red. And brown.”

Sesshomaru stood and offered her his hand.

“Come. I will be along shortly.” He pulled Kagome to her feet. “I must speak with the monk.”

Miroku tried to hide his cringe from Kagome, but it was unnecessary. She was utterly subdued as she gathered her jeans and shirt from her bag. She only had eyes for the two small bodies lying asleep in the room.

“I won't be long.” She said, obviously hesitant to leave.

Miroku and Sesshomaru both nodded even though she wasn’t looking at them.

Sesshomaru moved through the doorway and into the hall, watching as Kagome rounded the corner and left his sight. He turned his head and locked eyes with Miroku, taking a step back and expecting Miroku to join him in the hall.

Miroku did, closing the door behind him. He took a deep breath and faced Sesshomaru.

“You once, not long ago, told me that courting Kagome had never crossed your mind.”

“I did.” Miroku tilted his head forward.

“You praised her innocence and purity.”

“I did.”

“And yet she is no longer innocent.”

The undertone of a growl in Sesshomaru’s voice sent a chill up Miroku’s spine. This youkai could kill him in an instant. From the way he spoke, it could very well be an option at this point in time.

“I assure you, Lord Sesshomaru, Kagome is not simply a conquest for me.”

“Oh? You understand better than most what it means that she is under my protection. She will one day, very soon, bear my mark. The mark of my bloodline.”

Miroku felt a bead of sweat drip down his spine.

“I do understand.”

“How long will you stand at her side, monk? Until you grow bored? Until you die?”

Miroku locked eyes with Sesshomaru, his face hard. He gripped the shaft of his Shakujo tightly.

“Forever. I will stay with her forever, Sesshomaru.”

The air in the hall was charged with clashing jaki and reiki. Sesshomaru reached behind Miroku and slid the door open again.

“Know that if you die and leave her alone, I will bring you back and kill you myself; just for the satisfaction of it.”

Miroku felt his shoulders sag as he watched Sesshomaru leave.


	24. Conversations

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> AN: Sorry about the time between updates, guys and girls. I have lovely, wonderful, generous children and they wanted lots of snuggles. They love to share too. So they brought home some pretty hearty lung/respiratory sickness from school. And gave it to me. With my one functioning lung. @_@ Omph. So I’ve been in a mock-come trying to sleep it off.
> 
> Love you all, and thank you for not giving up on me these last few days of web silence. And for the comments while I’ve been so valiantly fighting this internal battle!
> 
> Note the self-depreciative sarcasm lol. None for my readers but lots of eye rolling for myself.
> 
> On to the new chapter.
> 
> … … …  
> Posted 2.1.2020  
> Unedited

Paradigm Shift

Chapter Twenty-four

… … …

The five surviving guards from the Western Hall were gathered together at the far end of Atsuta’s gardens, near to the bath house. It pleased Sesshomaru to note that two of his guards stood quietly in front of the door.

The other three stood at his approach. None of the inuyoukai bowed to him or spoke. Instead, they stood with their sleeveless left arms across their ribs; proudly displaying Sesshomaru’s crest on the back their left wrists.

The mark of his most elite, most loyal fighters. Those who bore his crest at their wrist did not serve him because they served the west; they served the west because they were loyal to him. This was not simply the crest of his bloodline, it was his own mark. Two magenta stripes wrapped around the guards’ wrists, curving around to the backs of their hands; a blue crescent moon nestled between and just above the pointed ends of the stripes.

He knew the two guarding the bath house wouldn’t leave their self-appointed posts. They would do as they saw fit to protect Sesshomaru and any under his protection unless told otherwise by Sesshomaru, himself.

These men bore his crest because they had earned his trust, his respect, and his loyalty just as they gave theirs. It was not often that he had to correct any of his guards’ behavior over the centuries. It happened, of course. There would always be disagreements on methods or interests, but it was rare.

“Mori fought well. Died well.” Sesshomaru announced.

His men shifted in agitation, their jaki flaring involuntarily before they clamped it back under control again.

“You are all that are left of the Western Hall’s fighting forces.” A pause. “One of you will take up his title and his place at my side as General.”

Ranks among the fighters who bore Sesshomaru’s mark were decided upon amongst the fighters themselves. It was just something else that showed his respect and trust in these men.

The fact that he allowed his guards to occupy all of the leadership ranks in his armies didn’t hurt his peace of mind while he traveled.

“I will need to know your decision in two days time, when I will return to the wolf dens from the bear clans.” All of the guards nodded once in acknowledgment. “I want my general at my side when I go to the boar and fox tribes near the southern borders.”

With that, Sesshomaru turned his back to his guards and the bath house. He knew the feel of the youkai leaning against the tree behind him.

“Lord Sesshomaru.” Heiji smiled and strode over to him, unceremoniously gathering the rigid taiyoukai into a crushing hug. “It has been too long.”

Sesshomaru shook out the sleeve of his hankimono and smoothed his hand down the front of it when he was released.

“Heiji.” He shook out his long silver hair. “The greeting of the bear clan is as exuberant as ever, I see.”

“Customs don’t easily change, Lord Sesshomaru.” Heiji laughed heartily. “As you well know.”

“Indeed.”

Heiji stuck out his arm to Sesshomaru and he clasped his fingers around the bear’s forearm.

“If you are heading to my clan, I would come along.”

“As is your right.” They released each other's arms. “I must speak with Kagome before we depart.”

Heiji shot him a grin and started walking backward.

“I’ll just head out if you don’t mind. I’m sure you can catch up.”

“Of course. I will not be long.”

They turned away from each other, Heiji taking off toward the western cliff face and Sesshomaru toward the door of the bath house.

… … …

Sango grimaced as she awoke. Her entire body absolutely _ached_. The worst of the pain was in her leg, but overall she felt like she had been crushed by a rockslide. Groaning and doing her best to keep her breathing steady through the effort and the pain, she sat up.

“I did not expect ye to wake so soon, Child.”

“Kaede?”

“Aye.”

Sango took in the familiar surroundings, her heart beginning to pick up its pace. She couldn’t stay here. Not injured. She swallowed thickly.

“How did I get here?” She peered under the blanket at the dressings on her leg, peeling them back to inspect the damage. “You drained the toxin?”

“Kouga brought ye to me. He has barely left.”

Sango felt a wave of relief was over her. If Kouga was able to bring her, she might not have to worry.

“He helped me to extract the venom.” Kaede gestured to Sango’s thigh even though Sango wasn’t looking at her. “He was curiously unaffected by the reiki that lingers here.”

Sango’s eyes closed and her face contorted.

“The reiki?”

“Aye. Kagome’s spiritual energies still remain.” Kaede turned back to chopping her herbs for the poultice she’d been preparing for Sango’s leg. “Are you not curious, Sango?”

“Not really. I was there after it all happened.”

Kaede smiled softly at her wooden slab where she worked.

“I speak of the wolf prince, Sango. Are ye not curious about his ability to be present in these lands?”

Sango paled, stuttering.

“I… Keade. That is…” She sighed and turned wary eyes to the elder miko. “You know, don’t you? You’re old enough to remember the stories.”

She heard Kaede laugh softly.

“Some. Rumors of stories.” She pointed her dull knife at Sango. “I never expected such rumors to hold any truth, let alone be able to see just why they could be true.” She set her knife on the wooden slab and wiped her hand on a cloth. “It is hard to argue the truth of it, now. I have seen the land affect ye in this state.”

“I can’t stay here, Kaede.”

“Aye. Ye are hardly a threat as ye are, but as ye begin to heal and the jaki rises up to heal ye… it would not be wise to be on sacred ground when your blood activates.”

Sango nodded slowly.

“I expect that the others will be along to collect ye, but I do not know when. In the mean time, one of the village men has agreed to ferry you to another village to recover.”

“I’m so sorry, Kaede. I don’t mean to cause you any trouble.”

“Nonsense, child. I think no differently of ye, youkai blood or no.”

Sango flinched. The taijiya had tried to keep this secret for so long, and she didn’t even have to be awake to betray it.

“Can ye stand on that leg?”

Sango bent the knee of her injured leg, jaw clenched. She nodded.

“I think so.”

Kaede looked at her with an appraising eye.

“Best we allow the young man to aid ye.”

Kaede nodded at Sango and strode through the door, returning with one of the village men that Sango vaguely recognized.

“Hello, miss. I’m Kyou.” He looked her over with concern. “Are you sure that you wouldn’t rather stay here and let Lady Kaede tend you? She’s a great healer…”

Sango glanced at Kaede who was shaking her head slowly.

So her secret hadn’t been shared, after all.

“I, uhm. Thank you, Kyou. I should really get moving though. I hope I’m not causing you any trouble?”

He flapped his hand at Sango with a gracious smile.

“Don’t worry about it! I’m headed to the next village for trade. It’s no problem at all to escort such a pretty woman at the same time!”

Sango smiled at the man’s blush.

“Would you like a hand to the cart?”

“Yes please.”

… … …

You would think that ruling over a bunch of islands would numb him to the discomfort of water travel, but it didn’t. He loathed traveling by water.

There was nothing to be done for it, though. He ran his hands through his wild black hair and closed his eyes.

“I understand that he’s a sea eagle, but why can’t the bastard pick a coastal home? No. He has to live out in the middle of the ocean on that forsaken rock of his.”

He pretended not to notice his men laughing at him quietly.

“We should be near, my lord. Yuuto’s cave should be just around this cliff’s edge.”

“Yes. Then we must sail out into the deeper waters.”

His tails flicked in agitation as his men voiced their humor again.

… … …

The feel of the thick, warm blood dripping from his claws would have probably been satisfying. If he could even comprehend the sensation. Then again, if he had evough conscious thought to be able to process it, he would be himself and probably be disgusted.

Once the birds that he hadn’t already torn apart pushed off into the air, he spared them no thought because he had no thought to spare. He would wander because that was instinct. Keep moving. Keep going.

He chewed at the bird flesh in his mouth. Not hungry anymore.

He looked around himself. No threats.

Still. Something was driving his instincts. There was a scent in the air that put his nerves on edge.

… … …

Miroku scrubbed his hands over his face. He didn’t deserve her. He knew he didn’t. He wasn’t any good for her, he knew that, but he was selfish.

He sat down near Rin and Shippou, hanging his head.

Had he taken advantage of her? Maybe he should have stopped it. She’d been so nervous. She’d been so torn over everything lately. First Inuyasha and the jewel and her heart being broken after so long and so much devotion.

He had definitely taken advantage of her.

He didn’t deserve her.

Sesshomaru was right to be skeptical of his intentions. It’s not like he had ever hidden the fact that he didn’t embrace anything or anyone that might be permanent in his life.

But he felt _so much_ for Kagome. He knew he loved her. How could anyone _not_ love her?

It didn’t matter if he loved her, though. He’d taken something from her that she could never get back.

Would she regret it once her emotions were finally stable again?

He grimaced.

Would Sesshomaru kill him if Kagome decided that she didn’t want him, after all?

Would he be destroyed if she didn’t want him, after all?

He screwed his closed eyes harder together.

He would be.

… … …

When Kagome heard the door open, she scrambled to the edge of the water and peered at the entrance, holding her breath as she let her mouth and nose dip under the water. Little bubbles floated up and splashed fecks of water into her eyes.

White silk and silver hair brought her relief and she pulled her chin up onto the tiles.

“Sesshomaru.” She smiled at him as he plucked a clean white yukata from its place. He tossed it over to her, making her squeak in surprise as it landed on her head.

“Cover yourself, Kagome.”

She pulled the yukata into the water, wrapping it around her more like a towel than a piece of clothing.

“I will be leaving shortly to go to the bear clans. I want you to go with the pups into the caves.”

Kagome nodded.

“Aren’t you going to…” She looked over Sesshomaru’s clean outfit and morbidly caked hair. “…clean up, first?”

Sesshomaru raised an eyebrow at her.

“Well… I mean, isn’t the… smell… killing you?”

“It is not pleasant. Time is imperative where the bears are concerned. They care not for a little gore.”

“A little?”

Sesshomaru crouched down at the edge of the water, looking into her face.

“There will be time to bath in-“ He looked into the pink water with disdain. “-more amiable conditions. Tomorrow. The wolves are hospitable.”

Kagome wrinkled her nose.

“It is pretty gross… I had to get off as much as I could though…”

A clawed finger ran down the bridge of Kagome’s scrunched nose.

“I would not like to see you tainted.” He told her.

Kagome tilted her head to the side.

“I spoke with… your monk.”

She blushed and averted her eyes.

“He has assured me of his intent. I must admit that I am hesitant. Is this what you want, Kagome?”

Still not looking at him, she nodded quickly.

Sesshomaru stood again, looking down at Kagome.

“I must take my leave of you. I will return to the wolf dens with the bear clans in two days or less. They are not far.”

He turned and began to walk away but was halted by Kagome’s voice.

“Could…” She hesitated when Sesshomaru looked over his shoulder at her. “I… nevermind. It’s stupid. I just… nevermind.”

“What is it, Kagome?”

She stared up at him, taking in the immaculant silk and how it made the drying smears of blood on his visible skin just that much more apparent. How it made the gore in his hair and on his pelt look so disquieting.

“It’s just… it just looks so _wrong_ …” He turned fully toward her again. “It’s stupid! Nevermind!”

“Kagome.”

She sighed, knowing that he wouldn’t let it go any easier than he ever let things go when it came to her, now. She should have just kept her big fat mouth shut.

“I was going to ask…” She cringed. “If I could…” She sucked in a deep breath and turned away from his imposing figure. This was so stupid. Why did she even think of it, let alone allow it to come out of her mouth? “ _washyourhair”_ She mumbled.

Everything that came after was a little too loud and a little too rushed. “I tolf you it was dumb! I didn’t even mean to say it! Kami. Don’t kill me, okay? I’m sorry. I shouldn’t-“

Her embarrassing ramble was cut off by the sound of his deep laugh.

“It has been many years since a woman has offered to _wash my hair_.”

Kagome spun in the water, blushing, and putting her back to his amused gaze.

“Grooming is an integral part of inuyoukai culture, Kagome. I am not offended. This is not quite the setting or the relationship that such a thing usually takes place in, though.”

“I’m sorry…”

“No need.”

“It just seems so _wrong_ … I mean… there’s _pieces_.”

Sesshomaru crouched down again and put his hand on the back of her head.

“Do not be embarrassed. There is no need.” He felt her nod under his hand. “Regrettably, I do not have the time to bathe, as I mentioned. I also do not believe that you would be wholly comfortable with myself so exposed in the water with you.”

“Well…”

Kagome peered over her shoulder. He raised an eyebrow at her again, waiting.

“You wouldn’t have to be naked…”

Why oh why couldn’t she keep her mouth shut? She needed to go to sleep. Stupid.

“I am not bathing in my silks, Kagome.”

She turned around the rest of the way, flailing her hand that didn’t hold the yukata onto her body.

“No! I mean… of course not…”

His eyes narrowed as he withdrew his hand.

“You could just..” ‘ _Shut up Kagome. Knock it off. Stop talking.’_ “Lay down…” _‘Oh man. Just kill me now. Sleep. This will have been a nightmare. A really really embarrassing nightmare’_

The blank stare Sesshomaru was giving her only made her mortified at her own thoughts and words.

“Surely you are not suggesting that I… lay on the _floor_.”

Yep. She was going to die of mortification.

“I’m sorry! Just forget it! I told you I was being stupid!”

Sesshomaru stood again and started walking toward the door. To her great surprise, he turned to pick up another yukata and walked back toward her.

“Wha..t?”

He flipped the garment out and it settled on the floor in front of her. When he sat down on it with his back to her, she could only stare. Then he _actually_ laid down, letting his hair fall all around her in the water.

“You will speak of this to _no one_ , understand?”

Kagome nodded quickly until she remembered that he couldn’t see her.

“Of course not! I wouldn’t!”

Sesshomaru waved his hand in the air obove his waist, snapping her out of her shock.

“Oh!”

Kagome gathered up his hair in the water, running her fingers through it to dislodge chucks of things that she wished she didn’t recognize.

“Thank you.” She whispered.

Sesshomaru hummed in response.

She got the worst of the blood and other things out of the soft mass, massaging the dried parts until they fell loose. It was strangely calming and reassuring for her.

“You may be picking up inuyoukai tendencies, Kagome.”

They both smiled softly.

“Well, I’m part of your house, now, right?”

“Yes. Though it is customary that _you_ take _my_ mark.”

“Huh?”

She let go of his hair as he sat upslowly, squeezing the liquid out as best as she could while he did so. He turned around and met her eyes, lifting his left sleeve to reveal the trail of hop stars.

“Imagine my surprise when I came across these as I dressed.”

Kagome stared, confused and inexplicably drawn to the little stars. Her brow crinkles and she looked at Sesshomaru in question.

“I don’t understand.”

“This mark contains your reiki, Kagome. It is _your_ mark.”

“But how…”

“I believe that it happened at the base of the mountain. The day your reiki flared for what we thought was no reason.”

He let his sleeve fall back over the mark and stood again, seeing the confusion linger on her face.

“Do not worry, Kagome. We can speak of it when we reach the wolf dens and more pressing matters are taken care of.”

He made it all the way to the door this time, even had it partially open, when she spoke.

“Sesshomaru!” Her hand was reached out toward him when he looked. “Just… be safe.”

He smiled at her.

“I will do my utmost.”

Then he was gone.

She stared at the door for a few minutes until _something_ brushed against her arm.

“Euuugh…Time to get out.”

She batted at the globs of flesh and guts floating around her and climbed out of the water, ready for some sleep, finally.


	25. Regroup

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Posted 2.2.2020  
> Unedited

Paradigm Shift

Chapter Twenty-five: Regroup

… … …

"Lord Haruki. So far from your own lands. What might bring you into my waters?"

A smile curved his lips as the dark fox sprawled himself comfortably on the woven nest of grass and leaves that covered the floor. Dark rock curved around the nest as if one of the ocean's waves had been petrified in its prime; made that way just for Yuuko.

"Come now, Yuuko. When have you ever stood on so much formality? Can't I just come for a visit with my dear friend?"

Haruki tucked one hand under his head and raised the other hand above his face. He snapped his fingers, conjuring a tiny ball of blue fire at the tip of his finger. He snapped again and it flickered out. Again and it was back. He continued playing with the flame as his smile grew wider and crinkled the corners of his eyes in mirth.

"Haruki, if you set my nest on fire, I'm going to hurt you. Do you realize how long it takes to build one this nice?" The click of Yuuko's long, dark, curved talons was loud against the rock wall where he stood, looking down at the mischievous fox lord. "I know you despise the water. I have never had the patience for your mischief. Get to it, fox."

Haruki clicked his tongue and pouted.

"You take all of my fun away, Yuuko." He sat up and scooted around to face Yuuko. "You look well, my friend. I hate to bear bad news but I must. The Western Hall has fallen." He watched the pale yellow of Yuuko's irises nearly disappear as the man's pupils dilated. To most, it wouldn't mean much. Haruki had known Yuuku for their entire lives, though. He knew how angry Yuuko was at that moment.

"What of our brother?" The smooth black and white feathers that covered Yuuko's head in place of hair bristled and fluttered as he spoke.

Haruki shook his head and looked away.

"I do not know. The report that I received didn't say." His eyes hardened and his jaw clenched as he glanced at the eagle and then looked away again. "I cannot believe that Sesshomaru would be defeated so easily. His Hall may be taken, but no." He shook his head, dark waves scattering around his shoulders.

"No. He still lives." His hands clenched into the nest at his sides. "We would know if he had been defeated. We would."

Yuuko smoothed his feathers with both hands and walked to the edge of the rock, letting the spray of saltwater dampen his hakama and wash up over his bare feet.

"I like to believe that, as well." He looked down the side of the rock, maybe a ten-foot drop to the water, watching the waves crash against it. "So it is that we go to war." He looked over his shoulder and watched Haruki stand, nodding.

"Yes. All of those on the Southern Isles who wish to fight are gathering at the Southern Hall in Kushima."

"They will not cross into the west undetected."

"No."

"Then we will fly."

And Yuuko smiled a truly intimidating smile as he leaped from the rock toward the water. Streaks of silver and yellow jaki were left in his wake as Haruki took his place at the edge of the rock and watched him. It was a magnificent sight, watching his friend assume his beast form.

His eyes sharpened and cut through the darkness of the night as he watched Yuuko's body grow and stretch.

An echoing screech sounded into the air as Yuuko took on his form. The talons on his feet dipped into the water and his wingtips dragged along the surface before he pumped his massive wings and shot into the air.

"We shall fly, brother." Haruki whispered.

As Yuuko circled through the air and passed near to the rock outcropping, Haruki jumped. He landed in a crouch on the giant eagle's neck. His hand stroked down the soft feathers as he draped himself along the crook between Yuuko's skull and neck.

"Naraku will rue his very existence, Yuuko. He will pay dearly for these crimes."

Another loud cry from the eagle answered him in agreement.

… … …

Heiji shot a rakish grin at the pale taiyoukai bounding over the land next to him. In his next stride, he hit the earth with a resounding blow. His knees bent to their limit and he propelled himself over the canopy of the forest, laughing as he surveyed the surrounding land. They had come more than halfway already. He bellowed with laughter as he landed again, looking ahead of him at the long silver braid swinging behind Sesshomaru.

Every now and then, he would gain ground on Sesshomaru, only to fall back when he was leveled with an impatient glare. He would hold his hands up in surrender even while his face split open to show his teeth in amusement.

They traveled swiftly and, as the sun began to wake, the great trees that housed the bear clans finally came into view.

Sesshomaru smirked as he looked to the sky above the towering trees. His brothers had come to him before he had even set out from the bears to find them.

Heiji spotted the eagles circling his home amongst the trees, as well. He watched Sesshomaru vault high into the air, consumed by greens and gold jaki as he took on his great dog form. If they weren't so imposing, they could almost be called adorable.

A long, pink tongue lolled between huge, pointed teeth as Sesshomaru bounded and swatted and snapped around the equally large eagle in greeting. A barking laugh rent the air when the eagle dove and latched its talons in the long white fur of the dog's back; lifting him from the ground with straining flaps of his wings.

As Heiji came to a stop near the suspended houses in the treetops, he watched the swirl of clashing jaki in the morning sky. He was pulled into a tight embrace by his father and they clapped each other on their broad shoulders before turning to watch the taiyoukai reign their beasts back into submission. Three figures fell gracefully to the ground in the distance and Heiji looked to his father as a heavy arm was slung around his shoulders.

"It has been quite a long time since the three of them have been in the same place at the same time, son." There was no light humor or easy-going air that their clan was known for around the man as he spoke.

"Not in my lifetime."

"No. Not for over two centuries."

"They are definitely a spectacle to behold. I have never felt such a swell of jaki all at once."

His father squeezed his shoulders as he replied.

"Nor will you, often. There are not many taiyoukai left and they are usually too busy for social calls. When they gather, you can be sure that danger will follow. Danger and vengeance."

Heiji nodded to his father as the three approached. Quite a sight indeed.

Haruki bounded ahead of the other two and Heiji's father released his shoulders, stepping away from him off to the side as the dark fox collided with his chest and he found himself rolling over the dirt. There were snarls and yips as roots and vines shot from the earth and flashing blue flames overtook them in a scuffle.

"Should I be concerned?" Heiji asked Sesshomaru who had come to stand at his side.

Sesshomaru shook his head and the eagle at his side chuckled.

The ground shook as Heiji's father was pinned to the ground by Haruki.

"Good to see you, old man." Haruki grinned down into an answering expression.

"Welcome, Lord Haruki." He accepted the hand up. "Though the circumstances are grim."

Their playful demeanors changed in an instant. They turned back to the other leaders, not giving any mind to the flashes of jaki in the sky as the other eagles released their best forms. Foxes and eagles joined bears on the walkways in the treetops. Some leaned over railings to watch, some fell to the ground to gather near their meeting, and some coaxed children into a group near the base of the widest tree in the middle.

Sesshomaru and Yuuko were each pulled into a hearty embrace in turn.

"Raiden, I see that I have little need to explain the reason for my visit."

"There are not many reasons that would bring two youkai lords and the eagle king to my doorstep."

Sesshomaru nodded and gestured to the assembled bear youkai.

"Your clan will join us in the mountains, then."

"Of course. Did you ever have a doubt?"

Sesshomaru rested his hand on Raiden's shoulder.

"Not for a moment, Raiden. I may have been young, but I remember well what you and yours did for myself and the west."

"Where would the lovely Yua be?" Yuuko asked.

Raiden turned and pointed to the group of small figures at the base of his home.

"Yua has gathered all of the cubs together for the trek." He looked into Sesshomaru's eyes. "All of the cubs, brown and black alike."

"So Taadaki and Naiko will join us?"

Raiden grit his teeth and clenched his fists at his side.

"No. Not yet. They will travel to the south to retrieve the cubs from their kin. The rest of their clan goes with them. They have not decided one way or the other, and they won't until they're sure their cubs are all safe." He blew a hot puff of air through his nose. "You remember what happened to their clan."

Sesshomaru nodded, his eyes following Yuuko's progress through the crowd toward Yua and the clan children.

"If your clan is prepared, we should be on our way. If we keep pace with all of the clan, we can be at the dens in a day's time."

Raiden smiled at him.

"You underestimate my bears, Lord Sesshomaru. We could be there by mid-day. My people are not so weak as we are assumed to be." He pointed a furry finger between Sesshomaru, Yuuko, and Haruki. "You three may want to reign in all of that jaki though. You're not easily overlooked alone, even less when you're all together like this. You'll be a beacon."

… … …

Atsuta Shrine practically buzzed with tension and everyone was fed and gathered, preparing for their departure. A handful of residents would accompany the inu pups, along with Kagome, Miroku, and Nozomi.

The gray inuyoukai was uncomfortable leaving Atsuta bereft of both herself and Heiji, but she had enough faith in Tatsuo and her twin Seijun to leave for _one day_. The thought still put her on edge, though. They were too impulsive. Too reactive and full of bluster. Too young to be left with so much authority for too long.

Her hackles rose in her discomfort. Times like this would always be filled with uncomfortable decisions and actions. She bared her teeth and shoved down the urge to snarl at the monk and miko busily preparing the inu pups. Humans had no part in the affairs of youkai. When would the western line learn? Her hackles practically stood on end as she turned and stalked away from the two humans.

Kagome stiffened as she felt Nozomi's jaki flare briefly and looked up through her lashes at the woman as she walked away from them.

"Nozomi doesn't like us much, does she?"

Miroku just rubbed his hand over her back in response.

Kagome gave herself a shake and twirled the pigtails of the little girl's brindled hair into twin buns at the back of her head. She wrapped the girl up in a hug, trying to quiet her sniffles. She couldn't do much to help get all of the kids ready, no one could do much other than explain what they would be doing and where they were going without giving away too many details. That, or finding new clothes for the pups whose clothes had been torn up the worst as the fled the Western Hall with the guards… some had even fled on their own; the oldest of the children.

Kagome and Miroku had taken it upon themselves to mingle with them all, trying to distract, entertain, and comfort the scared inus.

"You look so cute, sweetie!" Kagome nuzzled at her little cheek, but the girl's sniffles wouldn't subside.

"Th-Thank you."

Kagome wiped the tears from her little face with a sympathetic smile, nearly crying herself. Some of the pups had been inconsolable. It was only expected, she thought. When her dad had died, she had been a wreck for a long time. She couldn't even imagine what it would be like to lose both parents. And in the midst of so much blood and violence, no less.

"I can't find my brother…"

The girls big chocolate eyes looked up into her own, swimming with fresh tears and it twisted Kagome's heart painfully. She didn't know what to say. Didn't know how to comfort her. So she pulled the girl into a tight hug and hoped for the best.

"Come on sweetie, we have to get going. I think the others are ready, too."

She pulled the girl up with her as she stood, cradling her close. Miroku's hand at the small of her back was a welcome repose, drawing her focus away from the little girl's pain.

"Rin and Shippou are with the younger ones, waiting for us and Nozomi to head into the cave passages."

Just the sound of his voice warmed her. He made her want to believe that everything would turn out okay, that somehow everything would be alright eventually.

"Well, let's get going then. The sooner we get them safe, the better, right?"

"Mhm." Miroku rubbed across her back from side to side until Kagome walked away to join the group that was leaving Atsuta. He picked up her bag and slung it over her shoulder with a deep breath, thankful that Kagome seemed to be dealing with everything better than he had hoped.

After everything she had been through in the last few months… everything that they had all been through, she was finally coming into her own, showing her true strength, letting herself believe in her own ability to endure and overcome.

Nozomi had decided that they should all start out as early as they could instead of waiting until the evening. She told them all that the children shouldn't be allowed to settle in, just to be uprooted again just as they began to relax and that nothing could be accomplished by sitting around until that evening, anyway. She didn't receive a single disagreement, so the haggard group stood at the edge of Atsuta's grounds and watched as Nozomi spread her blood over some nondescript rock wall, letting her jaki pulse into the stone.

Miroku and Kagome had expected some sort of dramatic grinding or shifting of stone, but the whole thing was pretty anticlimactic. The stone just shimmered and faded from view, revealing the passage that led into the wolf dens.

They didn't rush as they made the long walk through all sorts of areas. Some parts were steep inclines and others level. There were wide caverns and narrow crevices to squeeze through, jagged floors, slick and damp passages, caves full of hot air currents, and even some amazingly beautiful crystal formations. The crystals turned out to be a lot sharper than Kagome had expected.

Rin was nestled into a guard's arms and Kagome could completely sympathize with her. It was a hard task to keep pace with a group of youkai, children or not. Her legs and sides burned from the hike and she hoped that they would reach the dens soon.

Kagome glared at Miroku's back. He didn't seem phased by the exertion at all. She wondered if she should pick up some martial arts training. With her focus elsewhere and her body struggling to keep up after the long hours of difficult travel, Kagome missed the smooth, flat chip of stone laying on the cave's bottom.

She took off down the smooth incline on her back as she stepped on it and fell with a scream that only lasted until she hit the floor and had the air knocked from her.

"Kagome!"

She heard a few of the group behind her call out. There was another familiar voice in the mix, though. She could swear that it was ahead of her, too.

Kagome found the bottom of the incline painfully, her left leg slamming into the rock as it leveled out. She went stumbling forward, biting her cheek as her left leg had to take her weight and she collided with something warm and _hard_.

"Owww" She groaned.

The thing that broke her momentum happened to be a hard chest covered in harder armor, and it was laughing at her.

"Good to see you, Kagome. You okay?"

She turned her face up into warm blue eyes and a roguish smile with relief as strong arms wrapped around her waist.

"Kouga!"

"Yep! Just got back, actually. Haven't even had time to see my cousin. Gotta say, having you fall into my arms is a nice welcome home."

Kagome sighed and let herself sag into his arms.

"I think I twisted my ankle."

Not needing any other excuse, Kouga swept her up off her feet and walked to the mouth of the passage she had flown out of.

"Oi! Everyone alright up there?"

A chorus of affirmatives echoed down to them. Satisfied, he turned and made his way into the open space of the cavern.

"So. Want to fill me in on what I've missed? All the wolves are in an uproar and I haven't been here long enough to ask any questions."

Kagome opened her mouth to tell him that she wasn't sure where to start when she was interrupted by Kazuo's shout.

"Kouga! Welcome home, cousin." He eyed the two of them. "Oh-ho! Don't let Sesshomaru catch you manhandling his little miko. He's pretty possessive."

Kouga's arms tightened around her back and thighs.

"Yeah, well, tell me something I don't already know."

"Come on, Cousin. Let's talk." He laughed. "Bring your bundle of miko if you want."

…

Kagome curled her toes and hissed.

"Yeah. Definitely a sprain. Ouch."

"How long until you'll be able to walk on it?"

Kouga sat on the ground with Kagome's foot in his lap, fussing at her even though he knew there wasn't anything he could do for her. He'd missed her, after all, and wolves were widely known to be very physically affectionate.

"Just a couple of days. It'll be sore for a few weeks though."

"So delicate. I forget how fragile humans are." Kazuo interjected.

Kouga rolled his eyes and Kagome puffed her cheeks full of air.

"I'm not _delicate_! Why does everyone think I'm _delicate_?"

"Because you are, my sweet." Kazuo rolled over onto his side on the floor and propped his head on his hand to look at her. "You could be one of the strongest humans out there and you'd still be delicate to us. You have to know that by now."

"Knock it off, Kazuo. Just tell me what the hell has been going on since I left." Kouga lifted Kagome's foot out of his lap and stood to kick Kazuo in the thigh.

"You saw what the pack is doing, Kouga. You know exactly what it means."

"Not exactly. How bad is it?"

"The Western Hall was attacked." He stood and pointed to some open scrolls spread out around them in their little corner. "We have to figure out how far they're spread out and what our first move is going to be."

"Attacked _how badly_ , Kazuo? I _do_ know why we're following the old plans, you know. How bad?"

"Taken. A handful of guards, some of the kids, whoever could make it out without being noticed. Dead or scattered or here."

Kagome's face flickered between the two wolves. She was doing her best to wrap her head around the fact that there was this whole world of cultures and politics among the youkai population. She'd never thought much of it when Kouga's wolf pack had called him _Prince Kouga_ but it was apparently a real title.

And now she was smack in the middle of a youkai war. Because of Naraku, who would never have gotten so strong if she hadn't broken the Shikon Jewel in the first place.

"There's more to come, Kazuo. Yokuto and his damn birds are gathering in the eastern lands. They've allied with Naraku."

"We figured out that much. Sesshomaru said that Naraku's hordes weren't the only ones to attack the Hall." Kazuo crouched over one of the bigger scrolls and gestured Kouga to copy him. "I've already shown this to Sesshomaru. This cavern in the middle, here. This is where we're going to set up the barriers. There just aren't enough of us anymore to bring up barriers over the whole system."

"That's true. They'll have clean water there, that's good." Kouga tapped his fingers on his knees. "How many of the pack are going to stay with them?"

"Depends on how many kids there are. Sesshomaru is bringing the bears back here soon. He left last night after taking your little miko to Atsuta."

When they both looked over their shoulders at her, Kagome blushed and smiled nervously, giving them a little wave.

"Both clans?" Kouga asked.

"Don't know. Shouldn't be long until they're here. I'm surprised that he isn't back yet."

"He might be keeping pace with the clan if they're bringing their cubs."

"True."

Kouga walked over to Kagome and scooped her up off the floor.

"Not much for us to do until everyone gets here, then. I'm gonna go see the women about getting this _delicate miko_ cleaned up."

Kagome couldn't decide whether to be aggravated at being called delicate again, or thankful at the mention of a bath. She settled for smacking Kouga in the shoulder.

"She knows that a female showing aggression toward a male is a sign of interest in a potential mate with wolves, right?" Kazuo's voice was laced with humor and his smile was hidden behind his fingertips.

"Come on, man. You had to tell her, didn't you?"

Kagome was doing a lovely imitation of a tomato, mouth agape and fighting the urge to shove Kouga in her indignation now that she knew it was considered flirting in some way. "I was hoping it would take at least a few days in the dens before she figured that out."

"Kouga!"

"Awe, don't be mad, Kagome." He gave her a calculating look. "On second thought, it's okay if you're mad. I like it when you're a little violent."

" _KOUGA_!"

"Let's see about finding the girls, hm?"

He laughed as he walked, marveling at her ability to keep everyone smiling just by being present. Even bright red with embarrassment, arms crossed and pouting, with a little anger on her face, she still made everyone around her feel a little bit lighter just by being there. Here they were talking about war, death, and betrayal, and this tiny woman in his arms managed to coax teasing and playfulness from them with nothing more than her existence.

… … …


	26. Under The Surface

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> AN: So I’ve been reading over everything I’ve gotten up for Paradigm Shift so far, rechecking some of my hints and markers for the plotline…and I lied again. Sorry guys. Editing hath commenced. Chapter one just went through its first edit and repost.
> 
> Le sigh
> 
> ~Ele
> 
> … … …  
> Posted 2.7.2020  
> Unedited

Paradigm Shift

Chapter Twenty-six: Under The Surface

**_ … … … _ **

Sango breathed a sigh of relief as she felt them pass out of the reiki-infused area around Edo. Her skin was buzzing and she absolutely ached from the effects of it. The energy didn’t affect her nearly as bad as it would a full youkai or even a hanyou, but it definitely made an impact.

The man that Kaede has sent her with had been rambling on and on about all sorts of things that she had stopped listening to a long time ago. The droning voice fell into the background the same way that just about everything did when she was recovering from a particularly bad wound.

There was something morbidly fascinating about watching her wounds start healing right before her eyes. The little bit of youkai blood in her was usually dormant. It sort of woke up when she was badly bodily wounded… sometimes when she got extremely angry… some other times that seemed pretty random, really.

Then again, she did her best to forget about her distant heritage as often as she could. She even carried around pigments so that she could excuse the markings over her eyes that would give her away. Kagome had brought her back some _eyeshadow_ from her home once. Sango had needed to make excuses for weeks about not using it. The pigment didn’t dye the skin the same way, it felt strange, it wasn’t the right color, and all sorts of other feeble reasons.

There weren’t a lot of people left these days that would remember where the taijiya village had originated. Not that it mattered too much anymore… there weren’t many of them left. There might not be any left, except her and what remained of Kohaku.

“Miss Sango?”

She was startled out of her thoughts by the man’s voice.

“Oh, uhm.” She smiled at him and wondered how long he had been trying to get her attention. “I’m sorry. What is it?”

He returned her smile after a moment.

“I was asking if you have family in the village ahead.”

“Oh. No. No, I don’t.” She looked off to the side of the road, watching the colors curl their way across the horizon as the sun came up.

“Oh. We’ll be there soon enough, at least. Is there someone else you’re going to stay with while you recover?”

Sango shook her head mutely.

The rest of the ride was quiet.

Once they passed the first houses on the outer edges of the village, Sango insisted on parting ways with her young escort and walking to the inn on her own. She was reserved at the best of times with her friends, and his curiosity grated at her frayed nerves. She had impatiently brushed aside his concerns of her leg, telling him that she would be able to go the short distance to the inn with little trouble, and had given him plenty of gracious and genuine thanks for taking her as far as he had.

Looking around at how much the village had grown since she had last stopped in, Sango found herself impressed. While she wouldn’t call the place wealthy, it was thriving. They had often visited here when they set out after collecting Kagome, carrying goods or messages from Edo. Messages.

They had carried a lot of messages from Kaede and the other villagers to this inn. There were a few people who would carry messages just about anywhere you asked, for a price. She knocked on the frame of the open door as she walked into that inn, one thought stuck in her head.

“Excuse me?”

A woman came hurrying around the corner of a hallway off to her left and Sango gave her a smile as they bowed to one another.

“Good morning, miss. Do you need a room for the night?” Once her eyes traveled over Sango’s form and landed on the blood soaking her long, layered yukata, she amended the question. “Or a few nights, perhaps?”

“If it’s possible, I’d like to send a message to Lord Kuranosuke. His compound is a few days toward the west of here. I would need a room until his response arrives if you could spare one for so long.”

The innkeeper bowed to Sango again.

“I will bring one of the men who carry such messages to your room after we get you all settled, then.”

Sango spared a minute to wonder if she was making the right decision by sending for the lord who had expressed so much interest in her, but she could hardly afford to stay here at this inn for the entire time it would take her to heal. The bite wounds were deep enough as it was, nevermind how much farther her leg had been opened up to extract the snake’s venom for her and the venom that hadn’t been taken care of; still making its arduous journey through her body.

Yes. Maybe. Hopefully, Lord Kuranosuke would respond kindly to her message.

**_ … … … _ **

Kouga and Kagome found the majority of the female wolves fawning over the inu pups in the large space where they would be erecting the protective barriers. Kagome smiled as she watched Shippou belly-crawling over the stone floor, staring down at the rock and using his fox abilities to very very slowly coat the whole cavern floor in a thick layer of soft mosses and grasses. He was obviously doing his best to make the place more inviting. He had even surrounded the pools of water in the cavern with flowers. There was one large body of water near the center, and it trickled down into a series of three pools that looked shallow enough to bathe in.

Kagome felt pride rising up in her chest the longer she watched the little kit. He was growing up and getting stronger quickly. The pride she felt was tinged with disappointment and sadness when she thought about the fact that she hadn’t even realized that his abilities had advanced so much, but she did her best to cling to the pride and the happiness that came with it.

Looking around intently, Kagome tapped her palm against Kouga’s armor and pointed once she finally spotted her target.

“Kouga! It’s Miyu!” Kagome waved excitedly when Miyu looked up and met her eyes with a wide smile. “Can you let me down now?”

Kouga chuckled at her exuberance and did as asked, though he kept his hands on her shoulders to steady her.

“You know Miyu?”

“Yep! I met her when Sesshomaru brought me here after the battle.”

Kouga wanted to ask for more details but didn’t have the opportunity.

“Kagome!” Miyu swept the smaller woman up into a hug.

“Miyu! I have your dress in my bag. I tried to clean it up but you’re probably going to want to go over it again.”

“Don’t worry about it. It’s yours.” Miyu winked at her. “Besides, it looked good on you.”

Kouga perked up at the direction their conversation was heading. Miyu had given Kagome a dress? A _wolf pack_ dress? He inhaled deeply, imagining it. That sounded like something he would love to see.

“Dress?” He coughed into his hand at the scratchy sound of his own voice and Miyu’s knowing look. “What dress?”

Kagome blushed and Miyu laughed.

“Prince Kouga! It’s good to have you back. Welcome home!”

“Thanks, Miyu. It feels good to be home.” Well, if they were going to ignore the dress then so could he. Outloud, anyway. He was sure that it would be in his head for a good long while. “So how are things going here? Almost ready?”

Miyu nodded and started pointing to different areas in the spacious cavern.

“All of the supplies are over there but we have to organize them still. We’re going to set up the food and wood over there where the little kit wants to try building a garden area. The bathing herbs are already set up around those two pools, they’re both big enough and shallow enough for us all.” She grabbed Kagome’s hand. “We’re about to get the kids in the bath with us girls, Kagome.” She started tugging Kagome away with her, slowly, as she finished updating Kouga. “The sleeping piles are going over there! The other guys could probably use some help!”

For her part, Kagome was torn about bathing now that her and Kouga had finally found the other women. On one hand, she was dying for a good bath. On the other, she really didn’t like the idea of walking all the way back through the maze of passages to wherever they were all planning to wash up.

“Hey Miyu?”

“Yeah?”

Kagome winced as she stumbled along in her new friend’s wake and her ankle yelled at her about it.

“How far a walk is it to where we’re taking the kids to clean up?”

Miyu stopped, much to Kagome’s delight, and turned to her while Kagome shifted her weight onto her uninjured foot.

“What do you mean?” Miyu’s confused gaze met hers. She pointed to the pools, just a few steps away. “They’re just right there. You okay, Kagome?”

“Oh! Yeah, I just sprained my ankle earlier. Wait..” Kagome’s eyes rounded as she took in Miyu’s words. “We’re bathing _here_?”

“Yeah, of course. Why would we go somewhere else when we’re here already?”

“But there are so many _guys_ here!” Kagome sputtered in a panic.

Miyu blinked rapidly at her.

“Yeah…”

“But…” Kagome searched for words to explain how Miyu obviously wasn’t grounded wholly in reality right now. “Guys! Here! Naked!”

Miyu looked around, still confused.

“Kagome… are you sure you’re alright?” She touched her hand to Kagome’s forehead, checking for a fever. “None of the guys are naked, Kagome.”

“No, I mean.. _we_ are going to be naked. Naked in front of the guys if we bathe here right now!” She whispered furiously.

Miyu gasped, finally grasping the problem.

“Oh! I forgot that humans don’t act like wolf packs. That’s so weird that you all bathe at different times. I mean… wouldn’t that take forever?”

Kagome stared, lips parted, not knowing how to respond.

“Don’t worry! The guys don’t care. Well. I’m sure they appreciate the sight if they take the time to pay attention…who wouldn’t like looking at us sexy things!?” Miyu preened and smirked at Kagome. “But we all bathe together most of the time. The guys won’t bother us while we wash, we’re all used to it. They’re not going to attack you or anything.”

Kagome started giggling in nervous hysterics, still not really comfortable and not really able to speak coherently.

“If it makes you feel better, you can be in the middle.” Miyu told her with a shrug.

Kagome’s nervous giggles quickened and she clamped her hand over her mouth as if she could shove the giggles back down her throat. **_That_** sentence didn’t conjure horribly suggestive images at all. Nope.

Miyu was shouting and waving at the other girls and the children, calling everyone over to them so they could _bathe in front of more than a dozen male wolves_. To Kagome’s surprise, none of the wolves or inu pups seemed bothered one bit about disrobing and starting to splash around in the water. They seemed to be having a lot of fun, actually. She was waved over a few times by some of the wolves until she finally sat down on the edge of the pool Miyu was chasing a couple of kids in. The poor things were nearly up to their necks in the water but that didn’t seem to slow them down at all. The water came up over Miyu’s ribs and she held her hands over her head with her claws extended, growling; obviously pretending to be a monster after them. It was adorable.

Kagome made up her mind and walked over. It wouldn’t hurt to just sit near them, after all. She could wash up after the guys had finished their work and wandered off somewhere else. She rolled up her jeans to her knees and let them slide into the pool.

The water was crystal clear and notably cool on her skin. She felt herself relaxing and laughing just as much as everyone else as she watched everyone play. The kids deserved this. They should be smiling like this. After everything they had been through, this was really good for them.

She nearly jumped out of her skin when Kouga spoke from right next to her.

“Aren’t you gonna clean up?”

Holding both hands over her heart, Kagome met his eyes where he was squatting down at her side.

“Don’t do that! You almost gave me a heart attack!”

Kouga pressed his lips tight together, trying as hard as he could to not laugh at her. His nostrils flared as he sucked in deep breaths to calm his humor and speak again.

“How come you’re not in there cleaning up? He asked.

“Oh… well…” She blushed.

Kouga cocked his head to the side.

“What’s wrong?”

Even his ears couldn’t make any sense of her mumbles.

“Huh?”

Kagome turned her face from Kouga’s and covered it with her hands for good measure.

“It’s just… there are guys everywhere…”

When she heard Kouga’s bellows of laughter, her arms came up to cover her whole head in embarrassment.

“We’re not going to attack you or anything, you know.” He pushed at Kagome’s arms. “We can control ourselves around your luscious bodies while you wash.” His teasing only made Kagome tighten her arms around her head, knowing that it wouldn’t help save her from Kouga’s tugging hands. After no time at all and with no effort, he had her wrists pinned in his strong hands, so Kagome resorted to shutting her eyes to hide from him.

“So I’ve been told.” She grumbled.

“Well, they’re right. Go on, Kagome. Wash up, have some fun with the pups.” With another laugh, Kouga stood up and made his way back to the other guys where they were still setting up all the supplies. Kagome watched him go with a huff.

Once she realized that she was definitely staring at the men much more than they were staring at anyone in the water, a blanket of depression settled over her shoulders. Maybe she was just tired. Maybe she was just being stupid. Maybe she was holding on to what life in the future was like. Maybe there had just been too much bad crammed into too little time.

Suddenly it didn’t even seem to matter if she was stared at or watched, anyway. The fun in the water seemed so very far away from her, even though she could feel the ripples against her ankles.

She chewed over the wonder that somehow she felt like she was watching everything here and everyone with their smiles and laughs from far away.

She felt like a spectator.

The smiling and the laughing grated against the inside of her scalp, now. How was it even possible to just _let go_ and _forget_ like they all seemed to be doing?

There were so many dead… so much blood.

They were stuck in this purgatory where war was looming over them all, casting this shadow that should but somehow didn’t dim this light that they cast.

And here she way, a stranger in this strange land where all she really did was intrude and steal happiness for herself.

Wow, she was being rude. Understatement of the century, right? Five centuries, actually.

Kagome turned her face away and covered it with her hand so that no one could see the twisting clash of depression, anger, and longing that stole over her expression. She wished that she was ignorant and fifteen again.

Wished that she couldn’t see past all this lighthearted atmosphere and into the darkness that lay below it.

She was shaken out of her spiral by a hesitant touch on her knee. Funny that she didn’t even see Rin coming toward her.

“Hey, Rin.” Kagome smiled to cover the distance she felt from the moment.

“Come play, Kagome!” Rin’s brown eyes sparkled as she swayed side to side in the water.

And because it really didn’t matter at all, Kagome did. She undressed without any more hesitation and she washed herself and she chased the children with Miyu and she smiled and laughed and played and cried behind the lighthearted atmosphere she took part in.

She volunteered to help when a few of the wolves started pulling clothing into the water and scrubbing at them with herbs, glad for the reprieve if not happy about it. At least she wasn’t having to smile smiles that didn’t reach her heart right now. Both feelings were foreign and uncomfortable.

She scrubbed harder to ignore it.

Eventually, some of the inu pups started to complain about hunger and everyone started trickling out of the water. The men were yelled at to bring some food for the little ones as the women started scooping up children and settling them on the soft moss floor, sitting behind them.

Not really thinking about it, Kagome let Miyu lead her over to the cluster of naked women and children. She sat down next to a pretty wolf with chocolate eyes and red hair who gave her a wide grin over the shoulder of a tiny inu who looked half asleep.

Kagome blinked at Miyu on her other side when a comb was pressed into her hand.

“Could you?”

Miyu scooted around and shook her hair out to fall behind her. It wasn’t as long as most of the other wolves’ hair, just barely past her shoulders.

“Sure!” Kagome smiled at Miyu’s back and carefully ran the tines of the comb through her wet hair. “Sesshomaru told me that grooming is important for inus. Is it like that for wolves too?”

Miyu hummed at her question before she answered.

“Sort of. I think it’s just as important, sure. Different though. Pack dynamics are different, you know?”

Kagome nodded, unseen, and set about French braiding Miyu’s hair. When she was done, Kagome passed the comb back to Miyu over her shoulder.

“Your turn!” Miyu exclaimed, scooting around in a circle to face Kagome and running her clawed fingers down her braid. “This feels nice. I haven’t ever felt a braid like this before.” She smiled and spun one finger in a circle in front of Kagome’s face. “Your turn!” She said again, excitedly.

Kagome laughed and did as she was told, letting herself relax into Miyu’s finger and the steady pull of the comb as she was groomed. She felt privileged and out of place at the same time, thinking about how easily the wolf pack had accepted her as one of their own with little to no preamble. She swallowed hard, shoving down the thoughts and emotions. She focused on the little tugs and the glide of Miyu’s claws over her scalp as her hair was twisted and wrung into whatever style Miyu had decided to give her.

She was nearly asleep when Miyu told her that she was finished. Kagome opened her eyes and looked around, noticing that most of the others had already wandered off to other places in the cave. There didn’t even seem to be many people left inside of it, either. They must have gone somewhere else. Maybe there were more supplies to be brought in?

“Well? Aren’t you going to feel it?” Miyu’s happy impatience was almost tangible.

Kagome’s blue eyes unfocused on her friend’s face as she ran her fingers over her hair. Miyu had painstakingly braided three locks of hair from behind her right ear and five from her left temple and jawline. They all reached backward and were twisted into a little bun at the back of her head, holding her hair away from her face.

“Wow! It feels really nice, thank you.”

“No problem! I wore my hair like that a lot when it was as long as yours.” She reached behind her and handed Kagome a pile of red and white silk. “That’s the stuff you left here last time. I washed it for you and fixed up the tears. They were pretty small and there weren’t many, so it didn’t take long.”

Kagome ran her hands over the smooth silk and was touched by this woman’s kindness and generosity. First she had gone out of her way to make Kagome comfortable even though they had just met and she was only there for a small amount of time, and now she had done this.

Kagome launched herself forward and threw her arms around Miyu’s shoulders.

“Thank you so much, Miyu. It means a lot to me.”

“Like I said, it didn’t even take long! Don’t worry so much!”

When Kagome let go of her, Miyu stood up and started pulling on some clean furs.

“I’m gonna go find my mate”

Kagome didn’t respond, holding the bundle of silk against her chest and looking past Miyu’s legs. Miroku was there, leaning against the wall and looking right into her eyes with something intense in his gaze. She distantly heard her friend laugh as she walked away, but her world had tunneled into a pinprick that only contained that intense gaze capturing her attention.

He was in just his white juban and gray pants again, barefoot and…walking toward her. She didn’t know why, but his approach made her stomach flip flop and her heart flutter. Inexplicably, she felt the urge to flee from him.

She scrambled to her feet and pulled the haori over her head. She didn’t manage to do more than straighten the haori before Miroku was standing right in front of her, his eyes searching her face, looking so deep into her eyes that she stopped breathing; wondering if he was somehow actually looking into her soul.

She gulped.

“Hey.” He whispered.

“H-Hey…”

His fingers brushed over her cheek and he leaned in, barely touching his lips to hers. It made her breathe again but it made her heart stop for a second, so it was a pretty equal trade.

“Here. I thought you might want these. You always seem more comfortable in them.” Miroku passed one of her pairs of jeans into her hands. These ones were black denim and about half a size too small, but she really was happy to have them in place of the silk hakama.

She noticed, with half a grin, that he had one of her shirts but was hiding it behind his back instead of passing that to her as well.

“I can’t have my shirt, too?” She pointed behind his back.

“Nope. I like the silk on you.” He leered and reached out, grabbing her wrist and tugging her into his chest. It was probably absurd that his warmth made her shiver but it happened anyway. “Why so sad?”

The question brought Kagome up short. She fisted her free hand in his juban and pushed her nose into his chest, hard. She was so sick of crying all the time and she refused to cry right now.

“What makes you think I’m sad?” Her wavering voice complete;y belied her confidence.

He let go of her wrist and crushed her into his body, making her very aware that her jeans and hakama had fallen to the floor by her feet and she was still in only the silk haori.

“I know because you’ve never been able to hide it from me, Kagome.”

And it was true.

Before her world had gone all topsy-turvy on her, even. He had always given her knowing looks when she caught him looking at her over dying fires. That didn’t include the times when he would slow his pace to match hers, offering her his steady and silent support when Inuyasha pushed them _just a little further_ as they traveled in search of shards. He had always known exactly when to pull her aside and offer sweet words, kind advice, an understanding ear, or a few minutes of fun distraction when her mood would fall.

She had never thought much of it over the years, but now, here, in his arms, with him so near, having seen all of him underneath that flippant attitude he wore like a mask, it meant worlds to her… and frightened her a little.

She pushed weakly against his chest with both hands.

“Stop it.” It was little more than a pleading whisper and she knew that he would ignore it as soon as she said it.

“Never.” He said.

Then his fingers were threaded into the hair at the base of her skull, and he was pulling her head back, and he was kissing her.

It lit her on fire and made her toes curl into the moss under her feet; made her forget the rest of the world and everything in it that felt like it would rip her heart into bits. Somehow, he made her feel like her heart was whole and would stay whole and she didn’t have a choice in that because it wasn’t really hers anymore.

She was panting for air when he moved from her mouth to bestow her hair a barely-there kiss. She felt bereft when he stepped back from her, pointing to the black denim covering her toes. She pulled them on, and snatched the hakama from the ground, while he talked.

“Everyone is heading out of the caves right now. Kazuo and Kouga have something planned for everyone. They finished in here, so now we’re just waiting for Sesshomaru and the bear clans to arrive.”

Miroku tilted his head to the right and turned. Kagome followed as he started walking toward the sleeping area that had been set up. She was impressed. Furs had been set up, squashed between large rocks on three sides, tied together at the seams, in what amounted to a really big, really warm tent. More pelts were hanging over the fourth side, acting as a series of door-flaps.

Between the insulating greenery that Shippou had grown and the thick pelts, the heat from all the bodies inside the makeshift tent was trapped, making the space more comfortable than she thought a cavern could possibly be.

Kagome sighed in contentment as she stepped inside. She hadn’t realized how numb to the cold she had gotten until she suddenly wasn’t cold anymore. Spotting her lavender backpack, she hurried over to tuck the silk hakama inside, wanting to satisfy her curiosity about this thing Kazuo and Kouga had planned outside.

She froze and blinked when she unzipped the bag and saw nothing but purple and black. Miroku’s robes. It seemed so personal, so intimate that his robes would be nestled there, on top of her own clothing and other supplies. She smiled softly and gently laid her hakama on to of them, giggling as she thought that now he was surrounded by her.

She zipped up the bag and folded back the flap that his the second pocket, opening that one and digging out the only thing in it; her projector that flung stars and suns and moons everywhere. Miroku chuckled as he watched her prance to the middle of the tent and turn it on.

All of the other occupants stared around at the lights in awe and she rocked back and forth on her heels at the sight.

“Ready to go?” Miroku asked.

“Yup!” Kagome practically skipped to his side and tucked her hand around his elbow, letting him lead the way out of the caves.

**_ … … … _ **

As it turned out, the surprise was a hidden valley that was cradled on all sides by mountains. It was in a shallow cup of a dip and it was breathtaking in the summer afternoon.

There was bustling activity everywhere. As Miroku led her down a narrow pathway, Kagome saw barrels of sweet-smelling juice. There was also a shallow, circular, metal basin the size of her bed. It was lifted over a fire pit surrounded by stone and full of water; littered with tokkuri and chirori of sake.

Little voices filled the air with echoing laughter and squeals of delight as they played. There was singing and music and roasting meat over cooking fires and all of made Kagome tighten her hand around Miroku’s elbow as she let the giddy feeling in her chest bubble over and out of her mouth.

She stood up on her tiptoes and pressed a kiss to his cheek when they reached the valley, walking away from him backward and forgetting the pain in her ankle for now. She turned and jogged over to Kouga with a grin, letting him lift her and swing her around in a circle over his head. She shrieked in delight and hugged him when he let her down.

Miroku watched them, walking at a much more sedate pace toward where Kouga sat down among a group of male wolves. He watched Kagome say something to him that made him grin up at her before she bounced away to, no doubt, talk to everyone she could.

He watched her with a full heart, knowing that even if she couldn’t see it, this was her element. She belonged in the midst of happiness and excitement. He hoped that she didn’t have enough time to think about how fleeting it was.

Midday passed, but the sun hadn’t set enough to call it evening, when shadows danced across the valley. Standing around the valley’s rim were dozens of bears, calling down to the wolves and being answered in loud rumbles and roars.

**_ … … … _ **

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> AN: Thank you all for reviewing! I’m glad you guys like it so far, and thank you to everyone who suggested that I keep the pairing out of the description / first few chapters.
> 
> ~Ele


End file.
